WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

Ladies - I really need your advice. DH and I are supposed to go on a cruise a week from Saturday for 5 nights. I am pretty anxious and worried about leaving DS for 5 days - to the point that we are thinking of cancelling the trip (luckily we bought the travel insurance).

My mom & sister are supposed to watch DS from Sat - Mon morning at our house. DS will still go to daycare during the week. DH's parents will watch DS at their house from Mon - Thurs when we return.

DS is a happy & good kid, and really good with other people (when I am around), however he is very attached to me (and to DH to a lesser extent). My sister watched Luke for the night at her house this past Friday and they had a rough night. Now she sees DS all the time, so it wasn't like she is a stranger. We have DS on a schedule and it works really well for us. He goes to bed every night at 8:30 without fail, but for my sister it was almost 10. I spoke with her this morning and she thinks it is going to be hard for DS and for me. That she can understand why and supports us cancelling, but knows he will survive if we are gone.

The other thing is as my mom has been sick (heart problems). Well she is sooo much better, however I am still nervous. I don't know if she could carry DS up & down the stairs and if my sister isn't here, then what. My sister is a coach and has a game on the Sat and a walk on the Sun. That leaves my mom to entertain DS all day. He is an active little guy and I don't know if she can chase around a 1 year old. Also she is not a morning person and DS wakes up and is ready to go around 6-6:30 every morning. She will need a nap more then he will!

I am not worried about DS with my inlaws too much, because they are really good with him and he is fine there. He may not like sleeping in their crib, but I think he will manage (he has slept over there before).

Lastly, I don't want to spend my vacation worried, miserable, or sad.

I feel like it is ridiculous that I can't leave him. But 5 days is a long time.

WWYD?

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

I am actually in the same position as you. DS is 7 months old and we are leaving at the end of the month for a vacation. I spend every day stressing about how sad he will be and how sad I will be. My parents are staying at my house, which I hope will make it easier on everyone. DS will be familiar with his surroundings, and will sleep in his crib every night. We are big on routine too, so that made it easier for me.

I think the best advice I can give you, is the same advice I give myself everyday ( fyi...i am still convincing myself) They will be fine. Its actually healthy for them to be with your family and other people. He will get all the attention he needs and probably be spoiled rotten by his grandparents. Go, enjoy yourself..at least try to. This might be your last vacation without him for a long time!!!

ETA: Sorry, but i have to add, my son is Luke..and he was born 02/23/08. What a coincidence!

Message edited 10/8/2008 11:51:12 AM.

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

This is such a tough call - there is a very strong part of me that wants to tell you to go - your son will be fine - and you probably need a vacation.

The other part of me knows how hard it is to leave your child - I mean - I can't even think of going away without him just yet. So, in that sense I completely understand where you are coming from.

Would you consider bringing him with you?

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

Did you want the time alone with DH? Is this why you decided not to bring him with you in the first place? If you think you could enjoy a holiday with DH and DC then I would cancel and just rebook for another time for all three of you.

Leaving him with your mom who might not be up to it 100% and you not feeling so sure about it either would ruin the holiday for me.

Good luck to you with whatever you decide to do

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

I understand your trepidation, but I would just go. He will be at your house over the weekend, and then his days will be pretty normal with going to daycare. I say go and enjoy every minute!!! I wish DH had an opportunity to be alone for 5 days, we're lucky if we can get a random night here and there.

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

I would go as long as my mom felt up to it. I would also arrange for a playdate/babysitting with a friend to break up the time & give your mom some time off.

Daycare during the week is routine so that will be time off for her too.

You don't have to chase around a 1 year old if the house is babyproofed. You can sit & watch them run around.

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

THANK YOU ladies!! I really appreciate and value all of your opinions.

That said I have decided not to cancel our trip. We need this. DH and I could use some relaxing down time to bond and reconnect. Who knows when we will be able to go away again just the two of us. When the little monkey arrives it will be much harder to get away.

I spoke to both my mom and my sister about my concerns. Unfortunately my sister is a HS Varsity cheerleading coach and they have a football game on Saturday and a walk for Breast Cancer on Sunday. So she won't be around as much as I would like. However, she is going to do her best and my mom might even take DS to the walk on Sunday. Also, I have arranged for DHs'cousin)to come by one of the days for a couple of hours.

After talking to quite a few people about my concerns and fears I know that DS is going to be fine. He will sleep and will eat when he is hungry enough. Kids are resilient and he will be fine. He might be a bit cranky, but I am sure our parents will survive and can handle it. The good part is he will be in his own house & environment over the weekend. Then during the week he will be going to daycare as usual, but then going to my inlaws.

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

Message edited 10/9/2008 12:34:32 PM.

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

I left for 3 days, nervous about it...

I called twice a day to check in, all was fine.

So, check in...then go about your day not worrying about naps, meals, diapers.

have a great time!

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

I am in a similar position. We are going to a wedding in the Carribbean in a month and leaving DS with my ILs for 5 days/4 night. I am really sad to go, DS will be about 10.5 months at the time. But at the same time I am excited to go.

It took awhile for DH and I to commit but now I feel it will be so good for us to reconnect as a couple. I dont have any concerns about leaving DS with my ILs as they watch him the 3 days I work so although he is practically glued to me when I am around, I know he will be fine with ILs. My only fear is that he will start walking for the first time or something while I am away!

In your case it sounds like there are some health concerns that play into it. Is there anyone, even a younger cousin who can come over to help your mom that Saturday when your sister is busy as say a Grandmas helper?

My feeling is to go, your son will be fine and it may be a tiring few days for your Mom, Sister and DS but they will get through it after all they only have him for like 2 days. And being that you are pregnant, honestly, this is probably the last time you are going to go away for a few days with just DH for awhile.

You will miss your DS but you will all get through it and I am sure you will have a nice time on your cruise.


ETA: i just read your response..I am glad you decided to go! Have fun, relax and get this...you can SLEEP IN!! DH and I can't wait for 5 days of sleeping past 6:30am!

Message edited 10/9/2008 1:28:48 PM.

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

IMO - a cruise is such a nice vacation and isn't cheap. If you're not going to be able to enjoy it right now - there's no sense in going, IMO

If that's the case, I would put it off until you could go away with less worry

ETA: Apologies, I saw you made your decision

Message edited 10/9/2008 2:26:58 PM.

Re: WWYD: Vacation & leaving your infant home with the grandparents ???

GO!!!
I left DS with my in laws for 2 weeks while DH and I went to Italy. It was a much needed vacation and I know I wont be able to do it again anytime soon.

I was worried--but we received phone calls and daily updates via computer. He was fine and I am sure your child will be also


Can I say it again?? GO