Big age difference between kids?

I’m due with my second DS any day now. My other DS is 6 years old. I never quite envisioned having kids so far apart but that’s life. Anyone else have kids with big age differences? From one point of view my older DS is old enough to understand what is happening to some extent but he used to it only being him around so I worry. Luckily he is in school all day but I’m nervous about how he will react not having mom and dad to himself. And having to share grandma and grandpa too.

Big age difference between kids?

My boyfriend does - he has a boy (13), girl (10), boy (7), and a girl (6). And his ex just had another baby last month (so the youngest girl and the new baby are 6 years apart).

Going from an only to having a sibling can be a big deal or not at all - depends on the nature of the child. My boyfriend said that his oldest used to love babies so he was really helpful when the youngest 2 came.

Big age difference between kids?

My cousin has 3 kids - 10 yrs between the first 2 (1st and 2nd marriage) and then 5 yrs between the middle and youngest. They are older now, (33, 23 & almost 18) but they have always all been really close, despite the age difference

Re: Big age difference between kids?

My boys are 3.5 years apart and my daughter is 5 years younger than my middle one (right now almost 12, 8 and 3). They’re all at different stages, but the boys will still play with their sister and entertain her. My boys are extremely active with sports so she gets dragged around to various games, but she finds ways to entertain herself. The boys have been pretty helpful with her since she was a baby. The boys fight much more with each other than they do with her. She generally gets along with them although she will gravitate towards one or the other at different times. I never wanted my kids super close in age so for us, there hasn’t been an issue with a larger age gap.

Re: Big age difference between kids?

I am way closer to my sister who is 7 years younger than me than to my sister who is 2 years older than me.

It was awesome having a sister so much younger. My mom still says my older sister and I were so helpful. I remember fighting over who got to hold her or feed her!

Re: Big age difference between kids?

My husband is 13 yrs older than his brother. I came into the family when the brother was 7.

They have a close relationship but it’s more like a parent/mentor than playmate. There’s still a lot of love there.

I think you just have to know that relationships come in all different kinds and even if kids aren’t close enough to be “peers” they can still have a deep family love bond. There’s also Benefits that come from the age difference - my hubby being a confidant during teen years etc - they are just different than benefits from close in age. Both are beautiful.

Congrats on your new baby. Wish you and your family all the joy. This world needs more happiness.

Big age difference between kids?

I think it comes down to personalities.

My sister and i are 8 years apart, and not particularly close, and my husband and his brother are 2 years and not terribly close either.

Meanwhile, I know people with both age gaps who are close.

Re: Big age difference between kids?

I am six and nine years older than my brothers. Now that they finally have kids we are much closer than we were. It has taken us a long road to get to this point. For a long time it felt more like a parent than sibling relationship because both of my parents worked so late that I was the one taking care of them.

Message edited 9/23/2020 10:30:42 PM.

Big age difference between kids?

My DH is 10 years older than his brother and they’ve always been close.
Buddies as kids, but now at 30ish/40ish and both with jobs, families, houses they are very tight.

Re: Big age difference between kids?

Yup! Mine are 15 (girl), 11 (boy), & 3 weeks (boy). The oldest is a big help & just in love with her brother. My now middle guy is definitely adjusting a little. He's been a bit clingy to me & the baby always wanting to be involved/helping. He's obviously old enough to understand what's going on & he is at an age where he sure did not want my attention on him all day. But I can tell it's a little weird for him no longer having that place as the "baby" in the family & having to adjust to having a baby around crying & needing quiet to sleep. He's also adjusting to my boyfriend being a dad to the little guy versus just a buddy to him.

For the most part, he's handling it just fine. I'm just trying to let him be involved & "help" as much as I can so he doesn't feel left out or pushed aside.

Message edited 9/24/2020 12:04:27 PM.

Big age difference between kids?

My girls are 8 years apart. It's not what I planned but I love the way it worked out. They are 12 and 4 now and have an amazing relationship. My oldest is the best big sister ever and my little one adores her. They do fight now and then which blows my mind sometimes since they're so far apart in age but my little one is annoying lol. I feel like it's the best of both worlds. I got to spend a lot of one on one time with my oldest and by the time her sister came along she was beyond ready for a sibling and there has been no resentment on her part.

Big age difference between kids?

I don't think 6 years is that big a difference.

My sister and I are 8 years apart and I remember being helpful when she was a baby. I don't recall being upset having a baby sister. She was a hot commodity at school pick up/drop off. Everyone wanted to hang with the baby. We're not close now, but lots of siblings aren't close regardless of age. Its always a crapshoot.

Re: Big age difference between kids?

Big age difference between kids?

My children are 5.5 years apart (almost 10 and 4) and they have a really good relationship right now. They play together and like to be together as well.

My sister is 5.5 years older and my brother is 7 years older than me. We are all really close and always have been. I remember them taking me out with them when I was 12 and they were 18/20 to go night bowling with their friends.

Re: Big age difference between kids?

I remember reading somewhere that 5 years is an ideal age gap- long enough that the older kid is helpful and does not get jealous but close enough that they can play together. I don't think another year would make much of a difference.

Personally I'm 8 years older than my sister and 9 years older than my brother. I'm closer with each of them than they are to each other lol! Growing up I was very hands on when they were babies and was never jealous. We did grow apart a bit when I was a teenager and too cool for everyone. But that's to be expected- 16 and 8 or 7 are totally different ages. We're very close now as adults. They're both godparents to my children, live within 10 minutes of me, and I see them almost every other day, but at least text with them daily.