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Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

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ckdk
My girls

Member since 5/05

7027 total posts

Name:
Cheryl

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Sometimes I wish I sent DD to daycare a few days/week just so I could go back to the gym, do errands etc but I don't... I work from home and could really use the time too...
But having said that... I am sending DD to a toddler program at Montessouri twice/week in January so I will have some xtra time when DD#2 comes...
I think it will be great for her and me...

BUT, if I didn't have the money, I would not send my child to daycare if I was a SAHM but it also wouldn't bother me if someone else did it, not my problem...

ramble over...

Posted 8/10/07 1:50 PM
 
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FelAndJon
needs to update her avatar pic

Member since 6/05

10212 total posts

Name:
Felice (aka LuckyBride2004)

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I have read through all the previous posts. Here is my 2 cents...
I work full time outside the home. On Saturday and Sunday, that is my Jeremy time. I have a tough time making plans with grownups where I would have to leave Jeremy with a sitter because I get 48 hours a week to stare at and play with my beautiful boy. Now, if I were a stay at home mom, I would have a full 7 FULL DAYS to stare at that same boy. I think that is a bit too much staring, no? I think everyone needs a day or 2 off from their "job" so I fully support the idea of getting a mothers helper, nanny, day care, whatever for a few days to get things done

Posted 8/10/07 1:59 PM
 

lvdolphins
My Loves!

Member since 5/05

46292 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I was thinking of enrolling DS in a PT 2 day a week program at a local school.
He would go in at 9 and get out 11:30.
I wouldn't be using it so much as "Me" time, but, "Run errands time".

I think 4 days a week is a lot. Day Care is NOT cheap (as we all know).
She is simply wasting money.
IMO kind of silly.

Posted 8/10/07 2:21 PM
 

Jeanene
LIF Zygote

Member since 5/05

27 total posts

Name:
Jeanene

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I really can't judge anyone else's decisions. What matters is that she is happy and that will help her child be happy.

Posted 8/10/07 2:21 PM
 

JennChris
life moves fast

Member since 5/05

4225 total posts

Name:
Jenn

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

for ME, I stay home because I don't want my kids in daycare.... but each to their own, you have to do what works for you.

Posted 8/10/07 2:22 PM
 

jgm26
LIF Adolescent

Member since 7/06

583 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I think its not my place to judge.
That said, would I do it? Maybe one day a week for a few hours. But not everyday. Thast just me, though

Posted 8/10/07 2:33 PM
 

SuzyQ
Mama to 3!?!?!?

Member since 7/06

8069 total posts

Name:
Susan

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by pmpkn087

Hmmm...difficult to say.

My opinion right now is: When the child is 2 years or older, daycare part time can't hurt especially if the child doesn't have any other siblings.

And, a little alone time for mommy isn't bad. When I was home for the week, I was so ready to come back to work because I was exhausted! Chat Icon



ITA. I have been thinking about putting DD in something at somepoint for socialization and DH is away all week most weeks so I get no break except when DD goes to bed. We have no family/friends close by so I have been thinking about putting her in something a few hours 2 days a week. But I feel guilty. I'll probably wait until she's older.

Posted 8/10/07 2:44 PM
 

Faithx2
All good things in 2016!!

Member since 8/05

20181 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by Jeanene

I really can't judge anyone else's decisions. What matters is that she is happy and that will help her child be happy.



ITA!

Posted 8/10/07 2:46 PM
 

Cookiegobbler
My little love bugs!!

Member since 9/05

5759 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Ya never know why people do things... maybe she is extremely stressed out and would do more harm to be home with her child... maybe she wants the child to interact with other children... its kinda hard to judge whether its right or wrong...
However, I will add... unless I was severly stressed DH would FLIP if I ever told him I wanted us to pay for daycare so I could get a manicure/pedicure!

Posted 8/10/07 2:47 PM
 

LIMOMx2
...

Member since 5/05

24989 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by BlessedMommy

Posted by Jeanene

I really can't judge anyone else's decisions. What matters is that she is happy and that will help her child be happy.



ITA!



But I also believe that her DH should be happy.

Posted 8/10/07 2:48 PM
 

BaroqueMama
Chase is one!

Member since 5/05

27530 total posts

Name:
me

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by BlessedMommy

Posted by Jeanene

I really can't judge anyone else's decisions. What matters is that she is happy and that will help her child be happy.



ITA!



Ditto.

Posted 8/10/07 2:56 PM
 

LIMOMx2
...

Member since 5/05

24989 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by BlessedMommy

Posted by Jeanene

I really can't judge anyone else's decisions. What matters is that she is happy and that will help her child be happy.



ITA!



She should go back to work then and take some of the stress off of her DH. Not just send him off to daycare FT while she shops, etc. and they struggle.

Message edited 8/10/2007 2:57:55 PM.

Posted 8/10/07 2:57 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

Member since 9/05

18504 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by 5ofClubs

I do judge people. I am not a very good Christian I know.

I will work on that.



Everyone judges. We wouldn't be human if we didn't.Chat Icon

Posted 8/10/07 3:02 PM
 

johnsae
Sip.

Member since 3/06

18677 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I plan to do this when DD gets older...once a week. I think it will be good for both of us and I really want her to have some social interaction.

Posted 8/10/07 3:05 PM
 

jessicamd
LIF Infant

Member since 8/06

367 total posts

Name:
Jessica

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I just may fall under this catergory-- sort of.... I am a WAHM- my husband and I have an eCommerce business on top of owning a small construction company. I run the eCommerce business during the day. I also have a 5 month old and a 2 year old. My 2 year old goes to daycare 2 days a week from 8-3-- We decided to put him in daycare for a few reasons---1. I don't really have any friends that live close- I just moved here from Ohio in early 2005-- so Gavin does not have any "friend' playmates. DD is just 5 months- so she isn't too fun to a 2 year old!! I feel like he should be socializing with other little guys--- 2. I use the time that he is in school to run errands for both our household and the businesses- It is easier to do that with just my DD in tow. I also use that time to spend on just business related things... We had hired a mothers helper 3 days a week before puting him into daycare-- but it just didn't work out.


Chat Icon

Posted 8/10/07 3:07 PM
 

pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe

Member since 9/05

32436 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by 5ofClubs

Posted by BlessedMommy

Posted by Jeanene

I really can't judge anyone else's decisions. What matters is that she is happy and that will help her child be happy.



ITA!



She should go back to work then and take some of the stress off of her DH. Not just send him off to daycare FT while she shops, etc. and they struggle.



Once again, it is really none of your business...I think you need to stay out of it

Posted 8/10/07 3:10 PM
 

antoinette
boy mamma

Member since 5/05

2975 total posts

Name:
Antoinette

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by Moehick

I have a friend who does not work and sends her child to daycare from 8am-4 or 5pm.

She does nothing all day but nap, watch tv and shop...pure laziness. I thought the point of being a SAHM was to be there all day for your child, that the parent raises the child and if social interaction was needed the mom and child would attend the countless programs offered throughout the week..ie Mommy and me, music programming, read alouds at the library, gymboree




I agree with this whole heartedly BUT I also agree on a break so I say 2-3 days is GREat!! if you can afford it. The social interaction is benficial and so is the down time for mommy.

Message edited 8/10/2007 3:20:28 PM.

Posted 8/10/07 3:13 PM
 

CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(

Member since 5/05

13848 total posts

Name:
Christine

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I had DD in daycare at the Y two hours a day, 2-3 days a week so I can work out. I definately needed to do that for me. And she loved the interaction with the other kids and care givers. I also think she will be less tramautized when she goes to day care full time next week. But it is included in my membership. I don't think I would pay extra for it.

Posted 8/10/07 3:17 PM
 

JessInCA
live laugh love

Member since 8/06

5082 total posts

Name:
Jess

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I think a SAHM sending a child to daycare is fine as a general concept - it's important for a mom to have her own time too. If it were me, though, and I knew our finances were going to be strained because of it, no way would I be sending the kid to day care all day every day.

I wonder if there could be a deeper issue here... is the woman maybe depressed, and seeking reprieve from her life in general?? If you need a break from your child that badly, to the point where it's creating money issues and disagreement between you and your spouse...?

Posted 8/10/07 3:25 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by smdl

I see nothing wrong with it. As long as it's only a few hours per week.

1/ Help children with social skills

2/ Give mommy some time for herself. It is quite amazing what a few hours to yourself can do. You feel all refreshed. Even if it's for a mani/pedi. Maybe those few hours are just what she needs.

It's hard being a mommy 24/7. I think having a few hours to yourself if what is needed sometimes to be keep your sanity.

I don't see the difference if the child is with family or friends or in daycare. If mom leaves her child with a friend or the daycare to do her nails, isn't it the same thing? She is having free time to herself.




ITA -0 especially on the socialization. I think it's harder to have them adjust to scheduled that are 2 days, better to do a structured setting 5 days for a few hours a day.

I wouldn't spend your energy being mad or jealous about it. It's her choice. It doesn't reflect on your or your little guy at all.

Posted 8/10/07 3:42 PM
 

Claud
LIF Adolescent

Member since 6/05

759 total posts

Name:
Claudine

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Posted by chmlengr

I am a SAHM, and my DH works for a family business and is never home. Some days he's gone well past 9-9, and that includes weekends. I don't really have any time in there for "me" time. So would I love to send them to daycare once or twice a week - YES! But that's not what its all about for me. We don't have that much disposable income - to be a SAHM I gave up some of the things I used to do for me, so now it is all about the kids.



Could have written this myself. My situation is similar, although my DH doesn't work as many hours...and he is working from a home office, so at least we see him more.

IMO, sending my kids to PT preschool is enough "me" time for me. As a SAHM, I consider it my JOB and primary responsibility to be playing, teaching and caring for my children all week long. We seek out opportunities for social interaction and playtime by meeting friends at the park and arranging playdates.

It is hard to find things to keep them busy on a daily basis, that's true. But, you have to be up for the challenge really, otherwise don't have children.

Posted 8/10/07 4:37 PM
 

EmmaNick
*

Member since 12/06

16001 total posts

Name:
*

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I know SAHM's that have live in nanny's. Sometimes I go Chat Icon , but whatever floats their boat Chat Icon

Posted 8/10/07 4:37 PM
 

4monkeys
boys will be boys =)

Member since 9/05

7205 total posts

Name:
:)

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

WEll this is a HECK of a loaded question, because we all have different opinions on what a SAHM "*should* do.

TO answer the OP, if money is tight, and she just needs ME time, it's INSANE that she would do this full time.

Now IF money were NOT an issue and it was a day or two a week, why not ?
we ALL do what works best for us.
There's no cookie cutter description to what a SAHM should do day in and day out. We can all write the perfect answer on here, but let's get real.

A mom is a human being, with interests, needs, challenges and goals.

Some moms have more goals than others, whether they are educational, career, long term or short term.

Sometimes we need a break in routine, a time to ourselves, and time to work on our own interests and things that make us who we are.

So depending on the indivudual situation, I do think any mom should have her own time to herself (and any SAHM mom of 2 or more should agree Chat Icon)...

I hope that made some sense. Chat Icon

Posted 8/10/07 6:04 PM
 

Tracey
***********

Member since 5/05

6297 total posts

Name:
Tracey - brideinapril

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

I understand the reasoning behind it - but if you clearly can not afford it and are struggling - but yet don't want to work to help support the family - why would you add such a big expense to the pile? 4 days a week? I think thats ridiculous given the circumstances. Chat Icon

Posted 8/10/07 6:08 PM
 

monkeybride
My Everything

Member since 5/05

20541 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you think it's right for a SAHM to send her child to

Message edited 11/24/2007 10:57:04 PM.

Posted 8/10/07 6:16 PM
 
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