Losing your mom, with kids.......

I feel like it is so much harder now losing my mom, this past November.
I see my boys grow older and do new things each day, and all I want to do is talk to her and ask her parenting advice.
She did a darn good job at raising all of us
I know I cant ask my MIL, because she is crazy.
Plus my mom raised 4 kids.
Anyone feel this way

Message edited 7/9/2007 10:10:41 AM.

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

I feel the same way. As you know, I lost my Mom last March and Michael was born last Aug. I see him do all these things that I wish she could of seen him do. As I see him grow, I miss her more & more each day.

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

I fel exactly the same way. Everytime Aly does something new - it is bitter sweet because my MOm isnt here to see it.

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

I completely understand your feelings, Diane. My mom died nearly 5 years ago (7/26) and not a day goes by that I don't wish that she was here to watch these wonderful babies grow and explore the beautiful world around them. I wish I could picture her interactions, feel her excitement. There will always be that void b/c no one can fulfill it

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

i don't have kids but think i can relate because i'm always thinking about when i have them. i think about how my mom missed my engagement, missed my wedding, will miss me having kids and getting to know them, miss their weddings.... And like you, i will not be able to turn to MIL.

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

I feel the same way especially now that I have 2 little guys. I feel like I never needed her more than I do now.

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

I don't have kids - and I'm not sure if I want kids. I think the reason I'm so undecided about having kids is partly because of not having my mother around.. I feel like I have no support system, noone to call if the baby is crying or if I need help....

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

my mom never got to see either one of my babies born. i pray everyday that she could have been there even for just one day. i completely understand how you feel. i wish she was around to help me and watch them grow as well.

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

My mom missed out on seeing my brother and I grow up.

I am so happy that my IL's are wonderful people and love my children dearly but I often do get sad when I see them interact with them because my parents can't.

They will never hear my mom or dad (who can't speak from a stroke) hear them tell or read a story to them I only had one living grandparent after the age of 3 and both of my mother's parents lived in Scotland. I never met my maternal grandfather and only met my maternal grandmother once before they died.

I guess today, with great grandparents being more of a possibility, it's hard to accept that my kids have no grandmother on my side and a grandfather that has limited physical interaction.

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

Yep...
Diane, I too, think about this all the time.....
The only advice I could give is to keep your mom's memory close at heart and do the best damn job you can do... Which you are!!!!! It is so very hard though when you need to turn to a mother figure and just can't.........

Your mom would be proud of you every which way........ Never forget that!!!!!


Many hugs

Message edited 8/29/2007 11:22:02 PM.

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

My dad passed a yr before dd was born and it does seem very strange. He never saw me or my brother who is currently expecting become parents. It saddens me but I try to look at this as my "second part of life". I try to seperate the two. It kills me when family members say "oh your dad would love her". I just feel like he doesnt know her. Its hard but like I said I seperate the 2 relationships.

Re: Losing your mom, with kids.......

I lost my mom when I was 10, there is not a day that go's buy that I dont think about her and wonder "what if" but I know I cant change anything...I have pictures around the house and my kids say"grandma in heaven" I tell them stories and try to keep traditions alive that I remember! Yes it is hard -life is so unfair sometimes yaknow? I know she is around in spirit and watching over us all, but yes Id give anything to pick up the phoen and get advice!