First time on this board

Hi ladies,

I am going through the most painful, emotional time of my life. I am supposed to be 9 weeks along right now in my 1st pregnancy. At my 8 week appointment a week ago, the baby was measuring 6 weeks and the NP said she saw a "flicker". Saturday night I ended up in the ER because of bleeding and the sono showed a baby but no heartbeat. I talked to my Dr. today and she said that it is most likely a miscarriage. I have to go back Friday for one last sonogram to be sure. Then I'll have to make the decision of having a D&C or waiting for it to happen naturally. I am so heartbroken and devastated and I keep thinking of more and more questions. I was wondering if anyone could help me with sojme of them.

If the baby is only measuring 6 weeks and I'm at 9 weeks, why haven't I miscarried naturally yet? The baby hasn't grown in 3 weeks.

Do you recommend that I have the D&C or wait it out?

Thanks

Re: First time on this board

first off, I'm so sorry everyone is different, and some people miscarry naturally quicker than others might. For me I just happened to start miscarrying naturally the same week of my first OB appt, and I was measuring 2 weeks behind when I started......personally I preferred to have the D&C as quickly as possible, I felt once it was done I could start trying to heal. Passing it naturally at home was absolute torture for me, it was hurting too much emotionally so that was my preference to have it done. Also I wanted them to test the tissue removed in the D&C in case there's something going on that I should be aware of before trying to get pregnant again.

Re: First time on this board

I'm so sorry you are going through this. Your situation is similar to mine. I went for my sono thought I would be around 6 and a half to 7 weeks... only measured 5 and a half... baby had a faaaaaiiiiint heartbeat... a week later, started spotting, went in should have been 7 and a half to 8 weeks, baby still only measuring 5 and a half.. no hb... I miscarried naturally that night. It's sooo hard... I am so sorry that you are going through this!!!

Re: First time on this board

All I can say is that I am so very sorry. I miscarried naturally an didn't have to make the choice about a D&C. I would suggest if you are confident in your doctors that follow their advice but most importantly follow your instincts. This is a terrible time in your life but it will pass. In the mean time we are here for you. Feel free to FM if you'd like.

Re: First time on this board

I am so sorry for your loss...its a terrible feeling I miscarried last week at 8 weeks. The baby and sac were measuring on time but there was no heartbeat From what I understand, it could be weeks before actually miscarrying because the body still sees the baby...I am not 100% sure but I remember reading it somewhere. Anyway, I opted for a D&C because I needed closure and I did not want to wait to miscarry naturally...I just felt that would be more painful emotionally and physically on top of what I was already feeling.

We are here for you if you need to talk during this difficult time

Re: First time on this board

I am soooo sorry. I m/c two weeks ago and the same thing happened to me I was 8 weeks and the baby was measuring only 6 weeks but we saw the heartbeat so the Dr. said it may be something wrong with the dates of conception etc., then the following week we saw the baby but no heartbeat, so dh and I opted for a D&C but ended up miscarring naturally which was REALLY painful physically and emotionally.
FM me if you have any questions or need anything

Re: First time on this board

sorry about your loss

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I am so sorry.

I know it is so hard. We had a similar decision to make over the summer and we went with the D&C the day after it was confirmed it was not a viable pregnancy. It was like I had to get it done as soon as possible. We were 8 weeks but the baby was measuring a couple of weeks behind and there was no heart beat.

For me, I don't think I would have been able to wait knowing that at some point I would start to bleed I just had to get it over with, but it is such a personal decision.

I am so sorry that you are faced with it.

Re: First time on this board

i am so sorry you are going through this

its a personal choice.. if you want to wait and see if you MC naturally , or just have the D&C right away.. some opt for the d&C for some closure and not wait it out..

i miscarried naturally both times.. i think either way is just as hard..

Re: First time on this board

i am so sorry ur going thru this
My first mc (thru my ob/gyn) i opted to have the D&C bc i didnt want to wait to mc on my own.
My second mc (thru the re) i was given the option to take meds to mc or d&c, i opted for the meds (cytotec)....i started mc 2 hrs after i took them.


again im so sorry for your loss

Re: First time on this board

I am very sorry for your loss.

Re: First time on this board

Oh honey I am sooo sorry you're going through this
I guess it's different for everyone. My first m/c was natural-- the second I chose a D&C because I felt it would be easier for me-- you have to do what you feel is right

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I'm so, so sorry for your loss

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I'm so sorry for your loss, but know that I found this board to be a great source of comfort and a wealth of information for my m/c's. As far as the d&c I had one for my first m/c I was measuring 6 wks at my 8 wk visit and dr. said it was just my dates being off and then found no heartbeat at the 12 wk visit and baby only measure 8wk 3d so I had a missed m/c for almost 4 wk and not known it, so I opted for the d&c. On my second m/c I naturally m/c at 5 wk. I found the d&c to be harder for me but I was also much further along, or so I thought, for that pregnancy. No matter what you decide know we're here for you. HTH

Re: First time on this board

i am so sorry what you are going through. It is such a personal choice. I have had 2 d&c's. the first time, i started to miscarry naturally, but had a lot of complications and ended up having to have a d&c anyway. the second time, i opted to have the d&c right away, for fear of the same thing happening.

the d&c itself is really painless and quick. it is the emotional part that was really hard for me. Having it happen on its own was painful and there is always that visual that I hold onto. SO for me, the choice would be the d&C.

i wish you all the best, it is an extremely difficult decision. keep asking questions if you need to...

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I am so very sorry for your loss.

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I'm so sorry. Just went through this a couple of months ago. I went with the D&C. I was afraid of waiting and waiting to miscarry on my own. Maybe after your appointment it will help you decide.

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I am sorry you are going through this. I just m/c naturally, but you need to do what you feel is best for you. I am sure nothing feels "best" right now, but whatever decision you make will be the right one for you.

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I'm so sorry that we have to meet on this board.
Sorry i missed this earlier and if this hasn't yet been resolved.....its such a personal decision. I had the same decision to make in September and a D&C was what I decided upon...with help and opinions from DH. But many women on here prefer to do it naturally and feel most confident with that decision.
My recommendation is to follow dr. advice, and when in doubt ask DH and those you love most (parents, siblings, close friend,etc) and let them guide you.

Message edited 1/27/2009 11:53:45 PM.

Re: First time on this board

Posted by amfm714
If the baby is only measuring 6 weeks and I'm at 9 weeks, why haven't I miscarried naturally yet? The baby hasn't grown in 3 weeks.

Do you recommend that I have the D&C or wait it out?

Thanks