Having a hard time enjoying this

Hi ladies

Im a regular poster in hiding. I had a m/c in the fall and i just got a BFP last week.
Initially i was THRILLED. But the last couple of days I have been so uneasy. I am only 4w5d today and i have comig ad going symptoms. All these terrible thoughts keep running thu my head. Im so afraid of another m/c.

How do i enjoy this? My 1st dr appt isnt until 3/31. Its obv WAY too early to see anything now so there is no way to reassure myself that everything is ok. I am fearing the worst and not able to apprciate this blessing at all

Re: Having a hard time enjoying this

I'm not sure I can help, but I just wanted to share that just this morning I was wondering how I will handle it when and if I get pregnant again. The first time I exploded with excitement and immediately called my parents, but now that I see how hard my mom and mil are taking the mc I'm considering not telling anyone (except DH) until the first prenatal appointment.

Message edited 3/11/2009 9:35:59 AM.

Re: Having a hard time enjoying this

unfortunatly having a mc takes away the excitement and carefreeness of being pregnant again. ive had 2 mc and im pregnant again and its an ongoing scare battle within me every day. ive already heard the hb, but i still cannot stop worrying.
I see u have ur first drs appt on the 31st. can u call ur dr and ask to ahve bloodwork done and another one done 2 days later to make sure ur betas are doubling and ur progesterone is good?
Im sure they will send u for bloodwork bc u had a previous mc b4.
Good luck !!!!!

Re: Having a hard time enjoying this

Re: Having a hard time enjoying this

I'm going through the exact same feelings. I recently had 2 m/c in a row and am now pregnant 4w 6d and am terrified. Every cramp is a sign of m/c not pregnancy to me and I keep running to the bathroom looking for blood on my underpants. Its really horrible.

ITA on the bloodwork its been my only sanity that my levels were good but having to wait another week for the first sono has been killer.

All we can do is hope and pray that our pregnancies will work out for the best. I know much easier said than done.

Re: Having a hard time enjoying this

I definetely agree about getting your levels checked- it will give you some peace of mind. But, you will continue to worry until you see the HB. Then you still worry that something will happen anyway......

The only thing that helped me in the beginning, and this is so hokey that I am kind of embarressed to tell this....was to physically not let myself think about MCing again....if I started to imagine that I was going to see blood when I went to the bathroom, I forced myself to picture myself sitting in a glider rocking a baby to sleep. I know it's goofy, but it took my mind away from going down the "what if it happens again" route to a happy daydream. Better to devote your mental energy to that.....

Re: Having a hard time enjoying this

I had a m/c in January and found out that I was pg again in February. I have been a nervous wreck. My next appt. is 3/19 and I have been counting down the days...its really tough

Re: Having a hard time enjoying this

Posted by GenLCSW

I had a m/c in January and found out that I was pg again in February. I have been a nervous wreck. My next appt. is 3/19 and I have been counting down the days...its really tough

Message edited 3/12/2009 9:15:29 AM.

Re: Having a hard time enjoying this

I don't think there is anyway to ease your worry other than time. I can imagine myself being crazed with worry during any future pregnancies based on my MC. It just takes away your ability to trust your body and your pregnancy.

In any case, congratulations and good luck

Re: Having a hard time enjoying this

I'm not enjoying my pregnancy the way I should be either. I hope it comes with time. Seeing the heartbeat certainly helped though.

I compare it to my first broken-heart. It just wasn't as carefree and innocent after that.