Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Can you share your experiences with me...

Did you have difficulty conceiving?

If you already had one DC, was it harder doing it again?

How tired were you having 2 young kids in your late 30's? Or, 1 for thatmatter, if it was your 1st child?

Anything else that you feel were pros/cons/etc? Please share!

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Obviously not me, but my mom's friend had her first child at 47 and her second at 50.

Everyone is happy, healthy etc.

I can't comment on conception though

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Oh good god - no way will I be 50 with a newborn

My grandma was a grandma for the 1st time at age 47!!!! By the time I was born (the baby) she was 50!

If that's the case, then it's just not happening - my cut off is 40. MAYBE 41, if I am still the energy bunny that I am now!

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

I was 2 months shy of 38 when DD was born.

I met my DH and married "later in life" We started TTC 8 months after our wedding (I was 35)

DD was conceived after 5 IUI attempts and 2 IVF attempts 2 years after we started TTC.



ETA: my DH is 44, we say ALL the time, there's something to be said for having kids at a younger age! She zaps what little energy we already had!

Message edited 9/14/2009 3:48:37 PM.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

I was 38 when I got pregnant. I gave birth at 39 and it was my first baby. I wasn't trying to get pg, we threw caution to the wind on vacation and came home with a souvenir!!!

I don't know if it was harder being and older mom because its all I know! He was a pretty easy baby though and by 2 months was sleeping 10pm to 7 am, so maybe we had it easy...

Now he is 2 and I am 41. He has more energy than any 5 people put together! I'm pooped, but in a good way!!

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

I was 34 when Roman was born. We conceived on our HM no probs. We actually started pretty soon for Clover because I thought since I was older it would be harder. I got pregnant first try and had her when I was 36. I had Paxton when I was 37. ALL of my pregnancies were great with no complications. My last two deliveries were amazing. I had some issues at delivery with my first but I think that was due more to the hospital and my doctor at the time. Going from Roman to Clover was ROUGH to say the least. I think because he was an easy baby and she was colicky and just a tough one. From Clover to Paxton was actually not as bad as I thought it would be but then again it depends on the baby. Paxton is a dream.

So while it is very exhausting with the three of them right now I love every minute and love that they are close in age.

Every person is different as you know though. Is somebody's biological clock ticking?????

Message edited 9/14/2009 3:58:11 PM.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

I had a little difficulty conceiving DD (when I was 33ish)...it took almost 10-11 months to conceive...had a little bit of issues being pregnant...nothing to be too concerned about.

Am I having issues conceiving #2. We have been trying over 2 years. In the beginning of those 2 years...I had an ectopic pregnancy and messed up my system for a while, but once got the go ahead...we have been trying ever since.
We are not covered for ANY testing to see why I am not getting pregnant...so until we can get some extra money in the bank...it is what it is for now

I am not sure if that answers your questions

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

First time mom at 38 here. DS is now 19 months old.

Yes, we had difficulty conceiving, but it was more a medical issue with DH. Not sure if his age had anything to do with it, but he's 49.

I'm tired, but I'm always tired. I think they call it lazy and being overweight. I'm working on that now so that I can
a. live for my son and have a healthy active relationship with him, and
b. attempt to conceive after 40. We tried for a while this past year, but will be taking a break to do IVF next year. I never thought I'd have children this late in life, but I also didn't meet and marry DH until I was almost 36.

One big pro is that I found myself really ready for the first time in my life to become a mom. I finally had my sh!t together (or most of it) when we decided to have a child. No, we didn't think it would turn into the challenge it was, but so be it, and I have a beautiful, healthy son. I was also a little more financially ready as I waited so damn long to get married that I had a few bucks in the bank and was able to buy a house before we had him.

Cons...just being tired, but I don't think that I'm any different than any working mom (except like I said, I'm a little lazy, but with a toddler you really can't be all THAT lazy)

Liza, it is what it is. You sound like a chick who has it together and can handle whatever comes your way.

Good luck!!

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

My aunt had my cousin when she was 37 (it was her 2nd marriage 2nd child). She said in some ways it was easier and some it was harder. With her first she was 24, she dealt with the sleepless night better, but my uncle was a POS and he abandoned her when my cousin was 6 months...she had to deal all by herself.

With her 2nd her husband was there to help as well as my family (we then lived around the block from them). So she said with the support it was easier but she was more tired. Her 2nd was also colicky so she said that was more difficult than her 1st but that would prob be the case at any age.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

I had my son when I was 33, the pregnancy before this one that ended in a late mc I got pregnant after trying for 3 months, I was 36, now I am 37 and I was sperminated on the first shag, second month after my cycle came back after my mc. I always think the odds are against us, but we seem to be a very fertile couple...lucky us!

Get Shagging!

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

No experience here....but I heard recently that 35 is no longer the age when women start to be viewed as high risk, but now 40 is. Not sure how true it is, but that's what I heard.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Liza,

As you know we had a week after I turned 37. We had gotten pregnant the 2nd month trying.

With we also got prego 2nd month trying (& I was 38)

Both pregnancies were wonderful.

For me going from 1-2 was rough; mainly b/c I do 98% of it myself b/c of DH's crazy hours. So that part is hard, especially after a full day at work. I'm sure if I was younger I'd have more energy than I do at 39.
Did you have difficulty conceiving?

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

I had Damien when I was 35 (got pregnant on the first try). I had Jaidy when I was 38 and got pregnant on the second try. I will admit that I wish I was younger. By the end of the night I am exhausted from working full time and taking care of them. Plus Jaidy is VERY high maintenance, still wants to be held all the time and she will be three in Nov. So that alone can can be very tiring. BUT I wouldn't trade a single second of it!!

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Ethan: had just turned 37 when I got PG. It was our 2nd month trying.

Baby #2: Got PG at 39 on our 3rd month trying. Ended in m/c.

If we did not EJ's diagnostic, we would have TTC again by now. PG at 40 and giving birth by 41 was my personal limit.

I wish I had been younger. PG in my late 30's did kick my butt. I realized there was a difference between being 32 and 37. I have to keep up so it's not like you really have a choice once you are in it. But man... that was really hard for me to recoup from a c-section also at almost 38 and BFing a NB. But I lived through it.

Message edited 9/14/2009 6:13:43 PM.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

So funny this was posted as DH and I have been discussing #3 like crazy lately.

We are both truly on the fence. We KNOW we want a third, but financially it wouldn't be the "best", and if we're going to do it, we need to do it NOW as I do NOT want to be pregnant much further than 37.

My first pg at 33 (turned 34 2 weeks before she was born) was a dream. My second I was 35 and it was MUCH more difficult. My recovery was quicker with my second though. Having 2 under 2 wasn't as bad as I thought after those initial hellacious first weeks. I can't imagine going to a third is much different.

Ugh- I just wish I was even 3 years younger. I wouldn't feel such pressure. I want to go back to work full time, but that will get pushed back another year.

I keep thinking, "no one EVER regrets having a child" and I don't ever want to regret NOT having #3. Stalking the pregnancy board doesn't help me either.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Posted by SweetCin

Liza,

As you know we had a week after I turned 37. We had gotten pregnant the 2nd month trying.

With we also got prego 2nd month trying (& I was 38)

Both pregnancies were wonderful.

For me going from 1-2 was rough; mainly b/c I do 98% of it myself b/c of DH's crazy hours. So that part is hard, especially after a full day at work. I'm sure if I was younger I'd have more energy than I do at 39.
Did you have difficulty conceiving?

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Pregnant at 40 and had DS at 41. Got pregnant on our HM, NOT trying, but obviously the little dude wanted to get here Thought I had the flu along with DH. He got better, I didn't. When I got the BFP I took about 25 more tests saying "noooooooooo waaaaay" (DH too). So now I'm 42 with a 1 year old and I have to say, for me/us, I wouldn't have it any other way. Part of me wishes we would have done it sooner but I *really* am feeling stronger, healthier,and more energetic than I did in my 30s. After the first trimester, the fatigue was gone, and even the sleepless nights weren't any more severe for us due to age. They suuuck whether you're 24 or 40.

Oh and my OB was in NYC, when I went for my first appt he asked "You seem freaked out, are you ok?" And I said well, to be honest I AM freaked out. I'm 40!!!! Aren't we too old???!!!" He literally did this and said "Colette, this is the upper east side. Everyone is 40."

Oh and my older sister had her 3rd baby at 42 and she's 2 now, completely perfect in every way, and my sis is the YOUNGEST 44 year old ever. (Her oldest just started COLLEGE, and the little one is in DAYCARE, that might've done my head in but they love it).

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

You can be 21 and need IVF or you can be 40 and get pregnant on month 1. There is just no way to tell unless you already have medical issues.
And honestly, the same goes with each pregnancy. It is such a hard thing to predict. I was 32 when I get pregnant, 33 when I had Molly. There was no way to know that my a nerve in my leg would compress and cause me so much pain. That was just a chance thing. And there are 22 years who need bedrest.

I think there are pros and cons to each side of the having a baby in your late 30's and early 40's. There are higher risk factors as you get older- that is just a medical fact. But if you want to be a mother, than let nothing stop you. And remember if you are unsure about pregnancy at a certain age you can also look into adoption. My beautiful son is adopted and from the minute I held him he was 110% my baby.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Did you have difficulty conceiving?

-Yes but it was not age related. It was an anatomical issue of cervical stenosis

How tired were you having 2 young kids in your late 30's? Or, 1 for thatmatter, if it was your 1st child?

-Very tired. Though a woman in her late thirties is far from too old to have a baby, there is no question that if I had had children 10 years earlier, things would be easier on me physically.

Anything else that you feel were pros/cons/etc? Please share!

-my pros and cons would surely offend SOMEONE here so if you want to know, FM me.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

I had Ava at 31 and Brody at almost 36.

I do feel that I would have a lot more energy if I was 10 years younger, but 10 years ago I was swinging single, working and living it up... Def not suited to be anyone's Mommy back then!

My only regret is that I didn't have them closer in age.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

I am 38 and had DS at 36- had no trouble at all conceiving, I got pregnant second month trying, I had a HORRIBLE pregnancy and swore up and down never again. I will admit I get tired, it's not easy for us. My DH is older than me over 40 and he gets tired as well. IT's not a bad thing though and I feel beyond blessed to have my little man. He completes our lives in a way I could have NEVER imagined.

I do think how great it would be to have a second and would go through the hell again because the end result is soooo worth it but we are just not in a good spot right now. I wouldn't be able to try until at a minimum a year from now, which would put me at 39 during pregnancy and giving birth at 40, that scares me a bit. I admit I'll be a bit sad if I can't have a second...

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

I got pregnant at 38 and had DS at 39. We tried for four or five months and then got pregnant, so no trouble conceiving.

We had a few small bumps in the road during the pregnancy but everything turned out ok in the end. Another issue is deciding on which tests to have or not to have done, so I'd make sure both parents are on the same page with that. Fortunately, DH and I agreed...it would have been bad if we didn't.

My labor and delivery was typical with no major complications.

Breastfeeding was a lot harder than I thought it would be and this contributed to how tired I was for the first few months after the baby was born. Even though DH helped out with the occaisional bottle, it is hard to be the one handling the majority of the feedings, especially at night. There's no way to describe what it is like to go for months without a good night's sleep. Exhausted is just the beginning.

However, when I look at DS who is just 8 months old it was worth all of it and I'd do it again. However, we're waiting until he turns 1 to talk about whether we would like to try one more time. I am just turning 40 next month.

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Posted by lipglossjunky73

Posted by SweetCin

Liza,

As you know we had a week after I turned 37. We had gotten pregnant the 2nd month trying.

With we also got prego 2nd month trying (& I was 38)

Both pregnancies were wonderful.

For me going from 1-2 was rough; mainly b/c I do 98% of it myself b/c of DH's crazy hours. So that part is hard, especially after a full day at work. I'm sure if I was younger I'd have more energy than I do at 39.
Did you have difficulty conceiving?

Cailen was an oops.

Last year DH and I were unofficially trying - BD'ing every other night from days 11 to 20-something, and it was obviously not successful. However, I never used OPK or any other determination of my O, so it was a shot in the dark. Next year, when I'm 36, or almost 37, if our money situation gets better, we might try again - I'm wondering if we will be successful using OPK's. But there's a part of me that is thinking my body just might be "done". Which makes Cailen even more of a blessing to me...

Re: Spinoff to ME75 - moms who had DC at age 36, 37, plus

Wow - ladies - thank you for the honest and hopeful responses!