WWYD?

Robbie was assigned a 'big report' in May.

Every day I ask him how it is going.
Every day he tells me it's good.
Every day I ask if I can see it.
Every day he says he must only work on it at school for the time being. I'm okay with this.

Last week I was sick. I didn't ask him about the report. Last night I remembered it was due Friday. I say "How is the report going?"

He says "Oh MOM! I lost it! I was almost finished and I lost it!"

I smell poop.

He gives me some story of how he took it home while I was in the hospital and it got lost and now he has to do the whole thing over and he only has 2 days. I know it's bs so I lean in real close and tell him to stop lying or it only gets worse. He gets contrite.

So - first issue - let's get this report turned out. I tell him he must bring me the packet home from school TODAY and that his father will take him to the library after school to get the necessary research materials since the school library is now inactive. He tells me there are no extra packets and he can't get one.. blah blah blah. I tell him get it or I will call the school. He gets no television, games or fun of any kind until that report is 100% complete.

But.. there is another issue.. the lies, the not getting the work done, etc.. My kid tried to lie to get out of trouble and to delay work. It was never going to work.. but he still tried it. Rob feels that Robbie's going to be stressed out and working on this report non-stop for 2 days with no other entertainment and that it is enough punishment. I feel like that is not really punishment so much as it is just the result of his procrastination. He's got a friend sleeping over Friday and a playdate on Sunday that he was really looking forward to. I feel like both need to be cancelled AND that he should be unburdened of electronic entertainment for at least 3 days. Rob says I'm being unreasonable.

So.. what do you guys think?

Re: WWYD?

I'd cancel the sleepover as punishment but let the playdate go on Sunday.

The reason being is he's already not getting any entertainment & I think punishing him for 5 days at his age is too long. You can get the message across with cancelling the sleepover.

If it makes you feel better, last night I found a ditto for a report that's due TODAY. No name on it so I'm not sure which kid got the assignment.

Neither of them owned up to the ditto this morning so I laid it on thick that someone is going to fail their report - and it's going to be a long weekend if I hear about it. Next thing I know Joseph's stomach was hurting this am & he thought he should stay home.

edited to clarify - no entertainment to Sunday would be added on to the punishment. I feel no entertainment until the assignment is done is part of doing the assignment itself.

Message edited 6/16/2010 10:12:22 AM.

Re: WWYD?

I would also cancel the sleepover, he has to know that there are consequences to not doing (or lying) about school assignments.

Re: WWYD?

I agree the sleepover is out, maybe even the playdate. There needs to be something more than just getting the work done. Getting the work done under preasure is not a consequesnce for lying IMO.

I would make sure he understands that procrastinating has caused unnecessary extra stress and that lying is what lost the playdate etc.

Re: WWYD?

I dont think you are unreasonable at all. It wasnt one lie it was multiple lies. yes its a strict punishment....but IMO very fitting of the offense. IF he is truly effected by your actions this may not happen again....at least for a while any way

Re: WWYD?