I am a little confused..

Pathology should be calling the dr next week I am thinking re: the embryo/fetus. What is it that I want to hear? I mean what is the best case scenario? I have TBH dh asked for the gender, I want to puke. I feel detached from the experience and dont know if I can handle hearing that its a girl/boy...too real. Any thoughts?

Message edited 12/20/2010 8:35:09 PM.

Re: I am a little confused..

Personally, if you don't know the gender already, I wouldn't find out (What's TBH, btw?)

I think the best case scenario now is to find out there was an abnormality that is not likely to reoccur and that the loss has nothing to di with your inability to hold a pregnancy. This is what I *think* anyway... My situation is different because we knew the cause of my loss right away.

Re: I am a little confused..

Posted by PennyCat

Personally, if you don't know the gender already, I wouldn't find out (What's TBH, btw?)

I think the best case scenario now is to find out there was an abnormality that is not likely to reoccur and that the loss has nothing to di with your inability to hold a pregnancy. This is what I *think* anyway... My situation is different because we knew the cause of my loss right away.

Re: I am a little confused..

i'm not sure what i want to hear...if there was something wrong i want to know if it's something we need to worry about for future pregnancies...once we get the results we are going to meet with a genetics counselor - something we need to do anyway b/c there is a genetic disease in my family (we also are having testing done for that disease)

part of me of thinks its best if they find nothing - and the dr said it's very likely that we won't ever know the cause...sometimes it just happens...

im not sure what the best case scenario is....

part of me wanted to know the gender but DH does not want to know. we decided nothing good can come from knowing just more heartache...to us, baby was "bean" and we decided to keep it that way....but i will admit part of me is curious to know, but i don't think i could handle knowing - like you said it makes it too real

Re: I am a little confused..

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I had 2 mc back to back 2 years ago. The second time they tested the fetus and told me the gender. It was a very wierd feeling knowing- I still feel kind of strange about it. Knowing personalizes it so much more, KWIM?