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I'm sure this has been posted before....

Posted By Message

Bluepixie
Mamarazzi

Member since 6/07

2618 total posts

Name:
Laura

I'm sure this has been posted before....

.... but I haven't seen it here yet.

My best friend sent me this when DS was first diagnosed. I only recently stopped reading it every day. I found it extremely comforting - and I hope some of you will too!

Welcome to Holland

c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.


Posted 4/18/11 8:23 AM
 

jozieb0925
Double Trouble!

Member since 5/05

4358 total posts

Name:
Josie

Re: I'm sure this has been posted before....

That was great! I am going to pass that along to some friends.

Posted 4/18/11 9:19 AM
 

islandersgirl74
Love Being A Mommy!

Member since 6/06

5804 total posts

Name:
Michelle

Re: I'm sure this has been posted before....

Wow...this was great!

Posted 4/18/11 6:51 PM
 

cjik
Welcome 2010!

Member since 2/06

8879 total posts

Name:

Re: I'm sure this has been posted before....

Thank you! I saw this years ago and thought it was beautifully written, though I had not had this experience then.

Thank you for posting it again.

Posted 4/19/11 12:17 PM
 

AidansArmy
LIF Adult

Member since 3/11

1292 total posts

Name:
Suzanne

Re: I'm sure this has been posted before....

I just picked up a book called Roadmap to Holland about a family and their down syndrome child. I can't wait to start reading it. The back of it has the Welcome to Holland note.

Posted 4/19/11 5:10 PM
 

smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!

Member since 5/06

32461 total posts

Name:
me

Re: I'm sure this has been posted before....

I know I am the only one but I HATE this poem.

Posted 4/19/11 5:20 PM
 

colesmom
Brady's mom too!

Member since 5/05

1989 total posts

Name:
Lea

Re: I'm sure this has been posted before....

Posted by smdl

I know I am the only one but I HATE this poem.



I happen to like it ... but I have a good friend who's FB status is often F**k Holland! Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 4/19/11 8:25 PM
 

smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!

Member since 5/06

32461 total posts

Name:
me

Re: I'm sure this has been posted before....

Posted by colesmom

Posted by smdl

I know I am the only one but I HATE this poem.



I happen to like it ... but I have a good friend who's FB status is often F**k Holland! Chat Icon Chat Icon



I might have to steal that status on a bad day. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 4/19/11 8:27 PM
 

maybebaby
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

6870 total posts

Name:
Maureen

Re: I'm sure this has been posted before....

Posted by smdl

I know I am the only one but I HATE this poem.



I hate it too..but i understand why others like it.

It made me feel even worse when johnny was diagnoses pdd-nos. Especially cause i was concentrating on helping him, and feeling a sense of normalcy in our lives. I knew he was a great child, like all our kids are. He had his quirks, his way of learning differently but i just didn't feel better reading that poem.

Posted 4/20/11 9:17 AM
 
 

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