I'm a s ucker right? bedtime related

My DS will be 2 next week. Lately he's been crying at bedtime. He started a few days before we left on vacation. Screamed when we got near the crib for bedtime (nap time too but that has stopped). I thought he was developing a fear of the crib, the dark, or sleep.

While on vacation he got better about not screaming/crying bc it was bedtime and willingly went to bed, but NOT in the crib (we rented a full sized crib). Since we were sharing a room with him we put him in our bed and he'd fall asleep relatively easily and we'd transfer him later.

Now that we are home he's still crying at bedtime, hysterically. I tried to CIO last night and after 45 minutes of hysterical crying and headbanging I went up there only to find that he had a massive poopie diaper

Tonight I attempted to CIO again and let him cry hysterically for 27 minutes. I went up there (afraid he'd poopied or something but he hadn't) and picked him up. I sat in the glider with him and he was asleep in less than 5 minutes.

I'm a s ucker right? I'm supposed to let him cry longer. But how do you deal with hearing your 2 year-old cry hysterically and bang his head. Arrghh! Help.

Re: I'm a s ucker right? bedtime related

You are NOT a sucker, you're a good mommy! At this age it's so hard because it's not like they can tell us what's wrong but they are verbal and knowledgeable enough to really, really fight CIO.

I went through this with DS at 2.5 years and we realized that we needed to set a really firm, consistent bedtime routine. It helped tremendously! It's still working 6 months later. Do you have a solid routine at night? Does it include time for winding down? And do you think he might be ready for a bed?

Re: I'm a s ucker right? bedtime related

I don't have the heart to CIO - it's just not for me. I give him 10 minutes and then rock him back to sleep. Many times, like your DS, he falls and bangs his head or face, loses his breathe, or has a dirty diaper. In a few years he probably won't even want to hug me anymore so I need to get as many in as I can now!

Does he have any molars coming in? DS would arch his back like a cat everytime we tried to put him in his crib for 3 weeks. Turns out he got all 4 of his 1yr old molars at the same time

Message edited 9/28/2011 9:45:25 PM.

Re: I'm a s ucker right? bedtime related

Re: I'm a s ucker right? bedtime related

It could definitely be molars.. when does he see the ped next? If you can't get in his mouth they can check for you. I always give Motrin if my kids are teething and can't sleep, but obviously only if you are comfortable with that - though him falling asleep after 5 min of rocking makes me think otherwise

Re: I'm a s ucker right? bedtime related

You're not a s ucker. If anything, you're just doing what's natural to a mom, going to her child when he/she cries for her. Nothing is wrong with that.

If you child needs to be soothed or rocked to sleep, then so be it. He will grow out of it. Mine did and when he wakes up in the middle of the night, I just bring him to bed with me. I treasure the time when he's still this young and I'm able to wake up with him sleeping next to me.

Sorry if I'm not help, but you have to go with your instinct here. Try CIO again in a few weeks or months if you feel he's not handling it well now 'cus of teething, separation anxiety or other reasons.

Re: I'm a s ucker right? bedtime related

I don't think you're a s ucker. I would do what works and then slowly wean from that. DS would go CRAZY if we didn't sit with him or lay on the floor while he slept (this was after taking away the binkies) and slowly we weaned the time we spent with him and the proximity to him. Now (2 months later) it's not a battle anymore. He has his moments, yes, but it's MUCH better and back to "old times" of good sleeping habits. DS has all his molars but I think it was a combination of the loss of his binkie and separation anxiety. He'll be 2 in a few weeks.

Re: I'm a s ucker right? bedtime related

DD is 16 months old and I had to go back to rocking her to help her calm down.

We have a routine now where we change into pj's, brush teeth and then sit in the glider and rock until she's nice and calm then into the crib. I rub her back for a bit then I walk out. Sometimes she's asleep sometime not.

If i didn't do this, she cried for over an hour. It just wasn't fair. We took away the paci at 12 months and all bedtime he!! broke out.

So be it for now. Don't know what else to do. We were all suffering b/c we hated hearing her cry and she would not get a good night sleep like that.

Re: I'm a s ucker right? bedtime related

You are not a sucker.. who would not rather be rocked and cuddled to sleep. I have seen patterns with my DD - right now her molars are coming in so if she does end up going in to sleep she wakes up and screams until I come get her. It ususally goes this way for a few weeks and then we can get her back to her regular sleep patterns. Good luck!