Any preemie moms out there?

My little one was born 8 weeks early and today marks one year since I was admitted to the hospital and her birthday is Saturday. I'm such a wreck...having lots of NICU flashbacks and crying randomly. Anyone else have this? If so, is the lead up to every birthday like this?

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My twins were born 10 weeks early and are healthy. They are 3 1/2 now. Sorry, I have not experienced the same emotions. Believe me not a day goes by that I do not marvel at my 2 pound miracles but I manage to keep it together. Although it takes a lot to rattle me, I can understand the flashbacks.

Happy Birthday to your little one!

Any preemie moms out there?

my DD was born 7 weeks early and i had/have major PTSD following our ordeal. the week of her first birthday i def had flashbacks and anxiety and i still get uneasy when i hear songs that i listened to around the time she was in the NICU. by the time her birthday arrived i felt a little better and i decided i didnt want to spend the day grieving what i didnt have (a normal birth experience) but i wanted to enjoy what was here - my AMAZING DD. it hurts and i have totally been there. but it DOES get easier. i have been and still am exploring many different avenues to help heal from this experience because it was so scarring. please do not hesitate to FM me if you want to talk about it!!!

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

I was induced a month early due to being Intrauterine growth restricted (IUGR) and very small for gestational age. As his 1st birthday nears, when I think about it I do have NICU flashbacks! the beeping! Songs that I remember listening too then make me cry and I can only imagine how I will feel when the time is actually here.

I hope your baby is doing well now

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My twins were born 8 weeks early, and are healthy. Although I have not experienced emotions like this around their birthday, I can tell you that NOT one decision i make for these boys are not sprinkled with NICU in the back of my mind. Those 30 days def impacted me in so many more ways then I know.


Now that I am pregnant again, I AM def starting to get anxiety about this baby being early

HUGS

Any preemie moms out there?

DS was born 7 weeks early and just turned 2 last Sunday. Last year and this year I did think about his birth and time in NICU. I thank God that he is a healthy and happy 2 year old despite his early entry.

Now that I am pregnant with DC#3 I am nervous about another preemie, but am taking all the precautions I can and am being monitored closely by the dr's to hopefully have a full term pregnancy this time.

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My twins were born 10 weeks early. Their first birthday was last month and the anniversarys that they came home was last week. It has been VERY hard for me. My ppd started when they came home. Also remembering the sadness that accompanied what should have been a happy time. And then there was the terrible guilt from leaving one of the babies there while bringing the other one home. Yes ...I am having a hard time also.
My girls are amazing! The highlights of my life. They are happy and healthy. I am so greatful for the amazing care they got and the wonderful support and education we got from the nicu.
I guess this is just another part of what makes us premie moms awesome!!

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

Posted by maybemommy10

My twins were born 8 weeks early, and are healthy. Although I have not experienced emotions like this around their birthday, I can tell you that NOT one decision i make for these boys are not sprinkled with NICU in the back of my mind. Those 30 days def impacted me in so many more ways then I know.


Now that I am pregnant again, I AM def starting to get anxiety about this baby being early

HUGS

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

Lots of DS was born at 26 weeks and spent 4 months in the NICU with many, many complications. He just turned 15 months and is doing amazing but I'm still having a hard time. I'm still having nightmares and PTSD symptoms and the weeks leading up to his 1st birthday were a mess. We had his party the weekend after his actual bday because I wanted to celebrate his day with just DH and I and I was far too emotional to entertain anyone. I cried hysterically a few times at the party especially when everyone sang 'happy birthday'...And i could cry now just thinking of it. I started meds about a month ago and I just started seeing a therapist. I hope that it gets better, and everyone says that it does but I haven't gotten to that point yet. Happy birthday to your baby and I hope you enjoy her special day

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My oldest was 7 weeks early. The whole experience was very traumatic for me. It's very exhausting to go back and forth to the hospital, try to eat, pump milk, etc.

She turned 5 last month and I never stop thinking about it. ,but now I see how smart she is. Our never know she was a preemie. I mean she is a peanut, but no delays whatsoever.

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

Thanks for replying mommies! It really is amazing how much a premature birth can impact your life. I love my daugher to pieces and she is doing amazing but despite that, my mind still wanders back to the month before she was born, the NICU, the separation and random scary and amazing moments from the early days of her life, including a readmission after I thought she was dying. I want to be a happy mommy on her big day but I am so afraid that I will be a mess. My DH and family are great but honestly, nobody but other preemie moms get it.

Regarding, ptsd- were any of you diagnosed or did you self diagnose, like me? My OB never brought it up.

Thanks for listening!
to all of you!

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My son was born 7 weeks early and spent 2 weeks in the NICU. He is now 2 1/2 and it still very much effects me. My son still doesn't sleep through the night and I know it's my fault because people say "Just let him cry" but all I can think about is that for his first 14 nights of his life I wasn't there when he cried. I'm actually in tears writing this. It is very hard for me and I have flashbacks all the time. But I look at my little boy and I honestly feel like he is such a miracle and that helps a lot.

Any preemie moms out there?

from all of the responses here i feel like we NEED to get a preemie PTSD support group going. it sounds like a lot of us are going through the same thing. if i could find someone to run it would anyone be interested? FM me if you feel more comfortable.

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My youngest DS was born 8 weeks early too & is now a 40lb 2 year old. I remember going through emotions after his birth & even approaching 1 year about his birth & his nicu stay. It also made my decision to not have anymore kids.

That said, I thank god everyday for the care he received at the nicu & know that all the decisions we made while he was there were worth it. I think any nicu mom.will tell you its s life changing experience & stays with you very vividly forever.

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

DS was 9 weeks early. I developed preeclampsia so they delivered him by emergency c-section. That was probably the most stressful time of my life. Also at that point we had just bought our first house and DH was fixing up the house every day after work. I felt like a single parent since DH barely got to visit him due to him trying to get the house ready for when he came home. I was pumping and my supply was low so I had anxiety about that and how I was failing as a mother. They were adding a fortifier to the breast milk that was too thick but no one realized it so DS spent extra time in the hospital bc he wasnt taking the bottles. It wasn't until I had to go back to work and stopped pumping and he started getting formula that we realized why he wasn't eating. It was so stressful and I had to go back to work even before DS was out of the NICU. Then after him being home about 3 weeks I caught strep and passed it on to my DS. We were almost back in the hospital. DS is going on 8 months (6 adjusted) and is doing unbelieveably well. He needs no interventions and is perfectly healthy. I try not to dwell on what we went through, but having a DC in the NICU is probably the hardest thing anyone can ever experience. I don't blame you for having anxiety thinking about all you went through. Try to focus on how well your DS is doing and how far he has come since his NICU days. Enjoy your little boy and have fun celebrating such a wonderful milestone!

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My son was born at 34 weeks and spent 41 days in the NICU. He had his first surgery at 2 weeks old and just had cleft palate surgery 2 weeks ago and had possibly 2 more to go. I went in for a routine doctors appointment on Wednesday December 21 2011 and had protein in my urine. I never expected to give birth but the next night I did since I had preeclampsia. I had an emergency c-section and he was born 5 13 which I thought was a good weight. I was in the hospital for Christmas which was extremely depressing. The best part was when one of the doctor's came in to check on me Christmas morning and asked if I wanted to go home. I got so excited to finally leave and get out however after she checked my chart she came back and said since my blood pressure was still high I had to stay. I don't remember much the Friday after my sons birth. With his first birthday coming up I find myself thinking more and more about my experience. I have spoken to flowerwife about what we have gone through. I think there are feelings that people who have gone through what we have gone through only understand.

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My DD was born just shy of 33 weeks. Being a NICU mom is no easy feat. One of the hardest things I've ever had to do was leave the hospital without my DD. She just turned 3 and her birthday is always a reminder to me of just how teeny my little girl was, how far she's come and how lucky I am to have this amazing, smart, big girl now!

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

Definitely had the same thing happen. I also had a really hard time when got preggo wtih DS #2...I was TERRIFIRED of having another preemie

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My DS was born at 30 weeks due to IUGR and a small gestational weight. He was born weighing 2lbs 9oz and needed surgery less than 24 hours after birth. He spent 46 days in NICU and, to this day, I have no idea how I managed to get through those days. I had my DD at home so when I was at the hospital with DS i felt guilty for not being with DD and when I was home I felt horrible that I wasn't with DS. I know he was sleeping and resting most of the time, but I felt so sad that he felt alone. I know that isn't possible, but I was so depressed and DH and I fought like there was no tomorrow. I definitely put a strain on our marriage, but we got through it. DS needed 2 follow up surgeries, which are behind us and he is developing wonderfully. He is hitting all the milestones for his birthage. I am sure when his first birthday approaches I will become very emotional because I know the truth is we could have lost him. His first birthday will be a happy yest very emotional time, but I will gladly take it.

ETA- I got emotional reading all your posts because it was like living the NICU stay all over again. But this all made us stronger as moms. Many to you and your LO's

Message edited 10/19/2012 8:52:14 PM.

Re: Any preemie moms out there?

My DD was born at 33 weeks. It was not easy at all being a NICU mom. I had a 2 year old at home, the hospital was 45 mins. away, I was going back and forth, pumping for her at home and at the hospital.

She is three now and is doing good. She didn't need any surgerys. She was in the NICU to grow. She was born at 2lbs 6oz and needed to gain. Also to learn how to suck, swallow and breathe. Took 6 weeks for her to accomplish that.

When we pass the exit to the hospital (actually just last weekend), I said to DH "I cannot believe we haven't been there in over 3 years. Feels like yesterday".