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PennyCat
Just call me mommy :)
Member since 7/08 19084 total posts
Name: Jib
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Oh the horror... Even Mr.Rogers explains breastfeeding
If anyone's kids need an explanation, just refer them to your favorite neighbor
Message edited 9/17/2014 1:50:31 PM.
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Posted 9/17/14 1:26 PM |
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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!
Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
Name: Marisa
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by MrsPenthouse
Posted by MarisaK
Posted by JME78
Posted by jgl
I personally think the teacher did the right thing. Im a teacher. IMO She was avoiding an issue of something that isnt really an appropriate conversation to have in school with other children of that age group. The other chikdren may begin to ask questions or even demonstrate it in an inapproprate way. Then other students go home and tell their parents and those parents call the school. Happens all the time
I did not BF, Im not against breastfeeding but as a parent as well I dont want pre- school to be the place where he learns about it
I don't understand this? What is there to learn about?
Not all 4 year old children have been exposed to breastfeeding - and right or wrong, not eveyrone is comfortable with it as a perfectly natural act. I didn't BF - My sister did. When my neice was born I had to explain to my boys that my sister was feeding the baby, that's where her milk came from, Mommys bodies make milk for their babies, not all babies take a bottle ....etc etc. They had 5 million questions and were intrigued and curious and nosey ........ But again, it was something I was able to explain to them -
Not all 4 year olds have been exposed to bottle feeding. Should I take issue with DS coming home asking me what a bottle is? Should I take issue with his nursery school for exposing him to bottles?
Feeding is feeding, end of story.
I should know better than to get involved with these type of posts ...........
MY OPINION - to the OP .........I think the teacher did the appropriate thing for a CLASSROOM full of 4 year olds - if you feel otherwise, then you have every right to speak up -
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Posted 9/17/14 1:29 PM |
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MrsA1012
love my little girl !
Member since 9/10 5777 total posts
Name: Me
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
I love Mr.Rogers !!!
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Posted 9/17/14 1:29 PM |
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Lola0703
LIF Adolescent
Member since 4/07 677 total posts
Name:
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by alli3131
Posted by MarisaK
Posted by JME78
Posted by jgl
I personally think the teacher did the right thing. Im a teacher. IMO She was avoiding an issue of something that isnt really an appropriate conversation to have in school with other children of that age group. The other chikdren may begin to ask questions or even demonstrate it in an inapproprate way. Then other students go home and tell their parents and those parents call the school. Happens all the time
I did not BF, Im not against breastfeeding but as a parent as well I dont want pre- school to be the place where he learns about it
I don't understand this? What is there to learn about?
Not all 4 year old children have been exposed to breastfeeding - and right or wrong, not eveyrone is comfortable with it as a perfectly natural act. I didn't BF - My sister did. When my neice was born I had to explain to my boys that my sister was feeding the baby, that's where her milk came from, Mommys bodies make milk for their babies, not all babies take a bottle ....etc etc. They had 5 million questions and were intrigued and curious and nosey ........ But again, it was something I was able to explain to them -
I completely agree. This is something the parents should be talking to their children about when they feel the need. A daycare teacher is not the right person.
I completely agree.
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Posted 9/17/14 1:40 PM |
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MrsT809
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 12167 total posts
Name:
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by BriBri2u
Posted by MrsT809
Posted by BriBri2u
Posted by JME78
Posted by JenandMikey
Just as I wouldn't want my four yr old coming home showing me how some other child does other natural bodily functions the same pertains to this.... like I wouldn't want my four old coming home telling me how she witnessed one child pooping and his method of wiping his butt.... or how a boy pees standing up rather than her sitting down .....or how this one kid burps or farts while eating his lunch ....and this list of very natural functions that I wouldn't want coming home can go on and on even to involving very natural sexual things that are very natural but are utterly inappropriate for four yr olds to simulate around other children in a school setting .....so just because it is a natural act it doesn't mean it is something appropriate to have children do around other children in a classroom setting ....teachers have to tread very lightly when it comes to anything that involves ones body parts especially private parts
This still reinforces the belief that BF is something to be done in private. How can you equate "utterly inappropriate" sexual things to BF?
How can you equate pooping or peeing with BF?
Our society deems peeing and pooping and other bodily functions be done in private. Breastfeeding is NOT THE SAME. People should not be raised to believe that breastfeeding is not appropriate to do in public.
No one is saying that it is NOT appropriate to do in public.
The fact is that in a school setting there are children who are not exposed to it and will have so many questions. Questions that a teacher IMO should not have to deal with given all the careful eggshells they already have to walk around.
I want to explain to my child why one mommy feeds her baby with her own body and why other mommy's use a bottle.
There will be other questions that my child will want answers to as he is exposed to them and I feel myself and DH should be the ones to answer them in our own words.
I think what the teacher in the OP's post did was justified.
But isn't it essentially the same situation for the OPs child? The teacher is stepping in and explaining that bfing is something only to be done in private and shouldn't be talked about. I don't think that's right either. I can see both sides which is what makes it such a tough situation in my eyes. You may not your child exposed to this conversation but I don't want my child censored from pretending to do it either.
Sorry I meant to write that if the OP's daughter had her shirt up while doing it then I agree with the teacher.
If she didn't I don't agree with her choice of words stating it is something it should be done in private. She could have chosen better words.
I'm guessing given the sensitivity that teachers have to have when it comes to children, their bodies and school, she probably didn't have time to think them out as well. That's just my opinion.
Those points I agree with. If she pulled her shirt up then that should be addressed. I also stated in my first post that I totally understand as a teacher that sometimes you find yourself in a situation you're not quite ready for. To think through every possible repercussion of how you might handle it is impossible in that second or two where you're deciding how to proceed.
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Posted 9/17/14 1:41 PM |
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MrsT809
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 12167 total posts
Name:
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by Lola0703
Posted by alli3131
Posted by MarisaK
Posted by JME78
Posted by jgl
I personally think the teacher did the right thing. Im a teacher. IMO She was avoiding an issue of something that isnt really an appropriate conversation to have in school with other children of that age group. The other chikdren may begin to ask questions or even demonstrate it in an inapproprate way. Then other students go home and tell their parents and those parents call the school. Happens all the time
I did not BF, Im not against breastfeeding but as a parent as well I dont want pre- school to be the place where he learns about it
I don't understand this? What is there to learn about?
Not all 4 year old children have been exposed to breastfeeding - and right or wrong, not eveyrone is comfortable with it as a perfectly natural act. I didn't BF - My sister did. When my neice was born I had to explain to my boys that my sister was feeding the baby, that's where her milk came from, Mommys bodies make milk for their babies, not all babies take a bottle ....etc etc. They had 5 million questions and were intrigued and curious and nosey ........ But again, it was something I was able to explain to them -
I completely agree. This is something the parents should be talking to their children about when they feel the need. A daycare teacher is not the right person.
I completely agree.
I understand that to an extent. My issue is now what happens when the OP is attending a school function and one of her babies is hungry? Is she supposed to leave or not nurse her baby bc you don't want your child exposed to it? I understand this is not exactly the same as a 4 year old explaining the idea directly to another 4 year old but the message sent to the child and the mom is that nursing doesn't belong in the school.
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Posted 9/17/14 1:44 PM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name: Pomegranate5
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by MrsT809
Posted by Lola0703
Posted by alli3131
Posted by MarisaK
Posted by JME78
Posted by jgl
I personally think the teacher did the right thing. Im a teacher. IMO She was avoiding an issue of something that isnt really an appropriate conversation to have in school with other children of that age group. The other chikdren may begin to ask questions or even demonstrate it in an inapproprate way. Then other students go home and tell their parents and those parents call the school. Happens all the time
I did not BF, Im not against breastfeeding but as a parent as well I dont want pre- school to be the place where he learns about it
I don't understand this? What is there to learn about?
Not all 4 year old children have been exposed to breastfeeding - and right or wrong, not eveyrone is comfortable with it as a perfectly natural act. I didn't BF - My sister did. When my neice was born I had to explain to my boys that my sister was feeding the baby, that's where her milk came from, Mommys bodies make milk for their babies, not all babies take a bottle ....etc etc. They had 5 million questions and were intrigued and curious and nosey ........ But again, it was something I was able to explain to them -
I completely agree. This is something the parents should be talking to their children about when they feel the need. A daycare teacher is not the right person.
I completely agree.
I understand that to an extent. My issue is now what happens when the OP is attending a school function and one of her babies is hungry? Is she supposed to leave or not nurse her baby bc you don't want your child exposed to it? I understand this is not exactly the same as a 4 year old explaining the idea directly to another 4 year old but the message sent to the child and the mom is that nursing doesn't belong in the school.
I think the issue for some people is that the parents were not present to handle any questions and teach and explain at a level they felt appropriate for their kids.
And personally, if I were around a group of young kids and their parents weren't there I would BF covered up and as discreetly as possible.
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Posted 9/17/14 2:00 PM |
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JenandMikey
life is good =)
Member since 5/07 4216 total posts
Name: We're so blessed!
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
I'm so sick of everyone always making it a bf vs ff debate on here....this is NOT about a mother being told to cover up and the frustration that comes along with that for bf mothers ....I simply addressed the argument that "it is a natural bodily function" so in other words "what's the big deal" and so I addressed what the big deal can be for some .....yes I can very easily equate bf with peeing pooping sex etc etc bc these are under a big umbrella term of "natural bodily functions".....bottom line bf is an ADULT bodily function that can be done whenever necessary but we are not talking about adults here we are talking about four year olds..... so like I said before like any other natural bodily function I would not want my four year old simulating these things to other kids in a school setting so I don't think the teacher crossed any lines
Message edited 9/17/2014 2:20:51 PM.
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Posted 9/17/14 2:14 PM |
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JenandMikey
life is good =)
Member since 5/07 4216 total posts
Name: We're so blessed!
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by BriBri2u
Posted by JME78
Posted by JenandMikey
Just as I wouldn't want my four yr old coming home showing me how some other child does other natural bodily functions the same pertains to this.... like I wouldn't want my four old coming home telling me how she witnessed one child pooping and his method of wiping his butt.... or how a boy pees standing up rather than her sitting down .....or how this one kid burps or farts while eating his lunch ....and this list of very natural functions that I wouldn't want coming home can go on and on even to involving very natural sexual things that are very natural but are utterly inappropriate for four yr olds to simulate around other children in a school setting .....so just because it is a natural act it doesn't mean it is something appropriate to have children do around other children in a classroom setting ....teachers have to tread very lightly when it comes to anything that involves ones body parts especially private parts
This still reinforces the belief that BF is something to be done in private. How can you equate "utterly inappropriate" sexual things to BF?
How can you equate pooping or peeing with BF?
Our society deems peeing and pooping and other bodily functions be done in private. Breastfeeding is NOT THE SAME. People should not be raised to believe that breastfeeding is not appropriate to do in public.
No one is saying that it is NOT appropriate to do in public.
The fact is that in a school setting there are children who are not exposed to it and will have so many questions. Questions that a teacher IMO should not have to deal with given all the careful eggshells they already have to walk around.
I want to explain to my child why one mommy feeds her baby with her own body and why other mommy's use a bottle.
There will be other questions that my child will want answers to as he is exposed to them and I feel myself and DH should be the ones to answer them in our own words.
I think what the teacher in the OP's post did was justified.
Exactly
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Posted 9/17/14 2:19 PM |
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MrsA1012
love my little girl !
Member since 9/10 5777 total posts
Name: Me
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Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Why would anyone care if a teacher told the children that breasts can be used to feed a baby and some moms do it that way and some moms do it with a bottle. You then explain what a mammal is and that animal moms, like cows, do the same thing. Then follow this statement up by saying that if they have more questions they can ask their parents. How is this controversial? It isn't like the teacher is explaining different sexual positions to the child, telling them to only vote Republican or that non-Christians are going to hell, lol ! They are just explaining a biological function in a straightforward manner. If a kid asked why do we poop , pee,burp or fart, I'd expect a similar answer. Again, I feel that if we are being honest, the discomfort exists because it is about breasts and they are perceived as sexual.
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Posted 9/17/14 2:42 PM |
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cateyemm
Twins!
Member since 7/10 8027 total posts
Name:
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by JME78
Posted by JenandMikey
Just as I wouldn't want my four yr old coming home showing me how some other child does other natural bodily functions the same pertains to this.... like I wouldn't want my four old coming home telling me how she witnessed one child pooping and his method of wiping his butt.... or how a boy pees standing up rather than her sitting down .....or how this one kid burps or farts while eating his lunch ....and this list of very natural functions that I wouldn't want coming home can go on and on even to involving very natural sexual things that are very natural but are utterly inappropriate for four yr olds to simulate around other children in a school setting .....so just because it is a natural act it doesn't mean it is something appropriate to have children do around other children in a classroom setting ....teachers have to tread very lightly when it comes to anything that involves ones body parts especially private parts
This still reinforces the belief that BF is something to be done in private. How can you equate "utterly inappropriate" sexual things to BF?
How can you equate pooping or peeing with BF?
Our society deems peeing and pooping and other bodily functions be done in private. Breastfeeding is NOT THE SAME. People should not be raised to believe that breastfeeding is not appropriate to do in public.
Thank you for saying this JME78
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Posted 9/17/14 2:47 PM |
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cateyemm
Twins!
Member since 7/10 8027 total posts
Name:
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
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Posted 9/17/14 2:47 PM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name: Keri
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by MarisaK
I think it depends on what exactly she was doing - I think there is a huge difference between picking up a doll and holding it to your chest, and lifting your shirt and/or explaining the detailed logistics of breastfeeding to her 4 year old peers -
Teachers have to be SO careful about what they say, how they say it, who's going to get offended ......who the touch - it's just so much extra stress.
I understand that you don't want your daughter to think feeding a baby is something to be done in private ........but a 4 year old is not a mother feeding a baby, and while you as her mother, in the privacy of your home may think it's sweet and natural for her to imitate you.......the teacher may feel it's inappropriate in the classroom.
I agree.
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Posted 9/17/14 2:49 PM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name: Keri
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
For all those who think the teacher was wrong-
Would you be okay with it if the teacher demonstrated breast feeding to the class?
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Posted 9/17/14 2:52 PM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name: Keri
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by BargainMama
I can't stand when people lose common sense to try to make a point.
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Posted 9/17/14 2:54 PM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name: Keri
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by JenandMikey
I totally agree that bf is a natural thing and I also agree that no one should ever be ashamed or embarrassed when doing so BUT
This is a preschool setting NOT an adult grown up forum where you want to "fight the fight" about bf
THIS is not an extension of anyone telling YOU as the mother to cover up in a public restaurant or store
Bottom line it isn't about you its about a school setting and what is appropriate and inappropriate to address
Just as I wouldn't want my four yr old coming home showing me how some other child does other natural bodily functions the same pertains to this.... like I wouldn't want my four old coming home telling me how she witnessed one child pooping and his method of wiping his butt.... or how a boy pees standing up rather than her sitting down .....or how this one kid burps or farts while eating his lunch ....and this list of very natural functions that I wouldn't want coming home can go on and on even to involving very natural sexual things that are very natural but are utterly inappropriate for four yr olds to simulate around other children in a school setting .....so just because it is a natural act it doesn't mean it is something appropriate to have children do around other children in a classroom setting ....teachers have to tread very lightly when it comes to anything that involves ones body parts especially private parts
Yes!! Exactly!!
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Posted 9/17/14 2:55 PM |
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MrsA1012
love my little girl !
Member since 9/10 5777 total posts
Name: Me
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by kahlua716
For all those who think the teacher was wrong-
Would you be okay with it if the teacher demonstrated breast feeding to the class?
If her shirt was down and she was explaining it in the context of how mammals eat, I would be absolutely fine with it.
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Posted 9/17/14 2:56 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by MrsT809 My issue is now what happens when the OP is attending a school function and one of her babies is hungry? Is she supposed to leave or not nurse her baby bc you don't want your child exposed to it?.
A grown woman feeding her child is a FAR different case than a child possibly exposing or referring to a body part that children are taught to keep private, covered, off limits to others for fear of predators and molesters. Teachers, adults AND other students as well can get accused of things that are VERY serious, so no, school is not the place for the teacher to chance ANYTHING crossing a line regarding the safety of a child's body.
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Posted 9/17/14 2:57 PM |
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JennyPenny
?
Member since 1/08 12702 total posts
Name: Jen
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by MarisaK
I understand that you don't want your daughter to think feeding a baby is something to be done in private ........but a 4 year old is not a mother feeding a baby, and while you as her mother, in the privacy of your home may think it's sweet and natural for her to imitate you.......the teacher may feel it's inappropriate in the classroom.
ITA!
She is not a mother feeding her baby, she's a four year old girl. It is inappropriate for her to lift her shirt (if that's what she was doing). If she was 'feeding' the baby over her shirt- than it should be a non-issue.
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Posted 9/17/14 2:57 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name: :)
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by JennyPenny
Posted by MarisaK
I understand that you don't want your daughter to think feeding a baby is something to be done in private ........but a 4 year old is not a mother feeding a baby, and while you as her mother, in the privacy of your home may think it's sweet and natural for her to imitate you.......the teacher may feel it's inappropriate in the classroom.
ITA!
She is not a mother feeding her baby, she's a four year old girl. It is inappropriate for her to lift her shirt (if that's what she was doing). If she was 'feeding' the baby over her shirt- than it should be a non-issue.
Some how I missed this.
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Posted 9/17/14 2:59 PM |
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kahlua716
3 Girls for Me!
Member since 8/07 12475 total posts
Name: Keri
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by MrsA1012
Posted by JenandMikey
I totally agree that bf is a natural thing and I also agree that no one should ever be ashamed or embarrassed when doing so BUT
This is a preschool setting NOT an adult grown up forum where you want to "fight the fight" about bf
THIS is not an extension of anyone telling YOU as the mother to cover up in a public restaurant or store
Bottom line it isn't about you its about a school setting and what is appropriate and inappropriate to address
Just as I wouldn't want my four yr old coming home showing me how some other child does other natural bodily functions the same pertains to this.... like I wouldn't want my four old coming home telling me how she witnessed one child pooping and his method of wiping his butt.... or how a boy pees standing up rather than her sitting down .....or how this one kid burps or farts while eating his lunch ....and this list of very natural functions that I wouldn't want coming home can go on and on even to involving very natural sexual things that are very natural but are utterly inappropriate for four yr olds to simulate around other children in a school setting .....so just because it is a natural act it doesn't mean it is something appropriate to have children do around other children in a classroom setting ....teachers have to tread very lightly when it comes to anything that involves ones body parts especially private parts Are you equating simulating a sexual act with simulating breast feeding ?
I know it's a stretch- but the original purpose of sex is for procreation-NOT pleasure. Just as the original purpose of breasts is for nutrition- not for pleasure. BUT they both have taken on other meanings in today's world.
Breasts are private. That's the MAIN thing I want my 4 yr old to know. SHe knows that they are also for feeding babies, but it still isn't appropriate for her to be lifting her shirt to pretend to "feed" a doll (or another child who may be pretending to be the baby).
If the demonstration was done with a doll over her shirt- then I agree the teacher shouldn't have said anything.
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Posted 9/17/14 3:00 PM |
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JenandMikey
life is good =)
Member since 5/07 4216 total posts
Name: We're so blessed!
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by kahlua716
Posted by MrsA1012
Posted by JenandMikey
I totally agree that bf is a natural thing and I also agree that no one should ever be ashamed or embarrassed when doing so BUT
This is a preschool setting NOT an adult grown up forum where you want to "fight the fight" about bf
THIS is not an extension of anyone telling YOU as the mother to cover up in a public restaurant or store
Bottom line it isn't about you its about a school setting and what is appropriate and inappropriate to address
Just as I wouldn't want my four yr old coming home showing me how some other child does other natural bodily functions the same pertains to this.... like I wouldn't want my four old coming home telling me how she witnessed one child pooping and his method of wiping his butt.... or how a boy pees standing up rather than her sitting down .....or how this one kid burps or farts while eating his lunch ....and this list of very natural functions that I wouldn't want coming home can go on and on even to involving very natural sexual things that are very natural but are utterly inappropriate for four yr olds to simulate around other children in a school setting .....so just because it is a natural act it doesn't mean it is something appropriate to have children do around other children in a classroom setting ....teachers have to tread very lightly when it comes to anything that involves ones body parts especially private parts Are you equating simulating a sexual act with simulating breast feeding ?
I know it's a stretch- but the original purpose of sex is for procreation-NOT pleasure. Just as the original purpose of breasts is for nutrition- not for pleasure. BUT they both have taken on other meanings in today's world.
Breasts are private. That's the MAIN thing I want my 4 yr old to know. SHe knows that they are also for feeding babies, but it still isn't appropriate for her to be lifting her shirt to pretend to "feed" a doll (or another child who may be pretending to be the baby).
If the demonstration was done with a doll over her shirt- then I agree the teacher shouldn't have said anything.
Amen!!!! Exactly!!!
Every body part including breasts have multiple purposes in all different households.....the first and main "teacher" to address these topics about private parts and ALL of their functions, especially to preschool children, should always be the parents
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Posted 9/17/14 3:34 PM |
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rsquared
Sweet P is here!
Member since 4/11 2026 total posts
Name: R
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
I would be upset. Part of normalizing breastfeeding is kids seeing it and talking about it, and acting like its a normal thing that people do, because, well....IT IS. I think that teacher should have let it go, honestly, unless the child was exposing her chest.
I am a breastfeeding teacher, and I approve this message.
Message edited 9/17/2014 3:41:47 PM.
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Posted 9/17/14 3:41 PM |
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b2b777
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 4474 total posts
Name:
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by Goobster
Posted by MrsT809 My issue is now what happens when the OP is attending a school function and one of her babies is hungry? Is she supposed to leave or not nurse her baby bc you don't want your child exposed to it?.
A grown woman feeding her child is a FAR different case than a child possibly exposing or referring to a body part that children are taught to keep private, covered, off limits to others for fear of predators and molesters. Teachers, adults AND other students as well can get accused of things that are VERY serious, so no, school is not the place for the teacher to chance ANYTHING crossing a line regarding the safety of a child's body.
I tend to agree with this. I refuse to make any judgement until i know exactly what happened here. Did the child raise their shirt or not? That to me is the defining factor here. I dont see how everyone can get so wrapped up in this without even knowing what actually occurred.
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Posted 9/17/14 3:44 PM |
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rsquared
Sweet P is here!
Member since 4/11 2026 total posts
Name: R
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Re: Kids pretending to breastfeed at school
Posted by rsquared
I would be upset. Part of normalizing breastfeeding is kids seeing it and talking about it, and acting like its a normal thing that people do, because, well....IT IS. I think that teacher should have let it go, honestly, unless the child was exposing her chest.
I am a breastfeeding teacher, and I approve this message.
I probably would have just observed the kids playing and let them work it out unless it got super detailed and inappropriate and then I would probably say "If anyone has questions about how different babies eat in different houses, you can ask your parents when you go home." And then I would redirect them into something else, so that the child doing the "breastfeeding" wouldn't feel like she was wrong in anyway (because she is not).
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Posted 9/17/14 3:47 PM |
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