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What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy

Member since 3/08

10420 total posts

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Momx100

What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

My good friend is throwing a 1st birthday party and it says that our presence is the best gift. Friend lives in a Manhattan apartment with 2 kids so I know space is an issue.

Would you go empty handed?

Feels weird to do so. Thought of getting a card with a $100 gift card.

We brought just a card to our first "no gift" party and we were like the only people who brought no gift. Afterwards, I have always brought at least a small educational book or toy or gift card.

Posted 10/12/14 5:07 PM
 
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dimples
LIF Infant

Member since 5/12

274 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

They wouldn't write that if they didn't mean it. I'd bring a card and maybe a bottle of wine (for the parents, of course).

Posted 10/12/14 5:10 PM
 

Kitten1929
LIF Adult

Member since 1/13

6040 total posts

Name:

What to take to

I know that it feels weird, but it's what they requested.

I'd use a book as a card/gift if you really wanted to push it.

Posted 10/12/14 5:14 PM
 

haveaquestion
LIF Adult

Member since 11/09

918 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

I'd bring a gift card. I felt horrible when we were the only people who didn't bring a gift to a "no gifts please" party.

Posted 10/12/14 7:14 PM
 

BaysideForever
LIF Adult

Member since 1/11

9976 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

I'd bring one or two books with a nice card. You could always bring a gift receipt if they really don't have the room for two extra books!

Posted 10/12/14 8:03 PM
 

2boys4me
He's coming soon!

Member since 4/10

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

She said no presents and you want to bring a $100 gift card?!! That's like the exact opposite of what she asked.

Posted 10/12/14 8:05 PM
 

PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken

Member since 6/11

9145 total posts

Name:
Phyllis

Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

I know what you mean. Id feel weird not bringing a gift. Maybe make a donation to children charity (st. Jude or w Xmas approaching toys for tots) and put the voucher in card "a donation has been made...etc ?

Posted 10/12/14 8:23 PM
 

MichLiz213
Life is Good!

Member since 7/07

7979 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

Posted by PhyllisNJoe

I know what you mean. Id feel weird not bringing a gift. Maybe make a donation to children charity (st. Jude or w Xmas approaching toys for tots) and put the voucher in card "a donation has been made...etc ?




This is what my cousin did for his 30th. He said no gifts, but should anyone feel it necessary to give a gift, to give a donation to the American Cancer Society or Leukemia and Lymphoma Society instead because he had lost his father to Leukemia.

Posted 10/12/14 8:38 PM
 

hmm
Sweet

Member since 1/14

7993 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

Posted by Bridex100

My good friend is throwing a 1st birthday party and it says that our presence is the best gift. Friend lives in a Manhattan apartment with 2 kids so I know space is an issue.

Would you go empty handed?

Feels weird to do so. Thought of getting a card with a $100 gift card.

We brought just a card to our first "no gift" party and we were like the only people who brought no gift. Afterwards, I have always brought at least a small educational book or toy or gift card.



of course we would all feel odd not bringing something, and someone will do the opposite of what is being asked. It sounds like your company is all they want. Sorry, but a one year old will never remember the gifts they received but might remember feelings and people.
perhaps the parents don't feel they need more "stuff" filling up space as you stated

bring a colorful card and write something beautiful, this mom might be a saver and someday this one year old might look back and read all the cards given and it will put a smile on his/her face

Message edited 10/12/2014 8:39:52 PM.

Posted 10/12/14 8:39 PM
 

MrsT809
LIF Adult

Member since 9/09

12167 total posts

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What to take to

I wouldn't feel bad for honoring their wishes. I don't think someone would write that and then be upset if you were one of a few who actually listened. I would think they'd probably be more bothered by all the people who don't listen. Bring a nice card and if you really feel obligated then do a book or a small gift card.

Posted 10/12/14 8:39 PM
 

RainaK
LIF Adult

Member since 4/14

904 total posts

Name:
R

What to take to

Hmm...maybe a delicious desert and card (with a donation if you feel the desert and card aren't enough?).

Posted 10/12/14 8:50 PM
 

julybride0706
LIF Adult

Member since 3/07

1376 total posts

Name:
kaitlyn

Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

Posted by dimples

They wouldn't write that if they didn't mean it. I'd bring a card.



This!

For DS 6th birthday at Bounce U, i did the same. I explained to DS that birthdays are time to celebrate with people you love and creating memories and not just for presents. He understood. I sent out 2 reminders about not bringing gifts because i really meant NO GIFTS, just a birthday card. Someone still end up bringing 1. I have to admit, I was annoyed.

Posted 10/12/14 8:54 PM
 

Adri
Joy!

Member since 5/05

3116 total posts

Name:
A

Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

Posted by MrsT809

I wouldn't feel bad for honoring their wishes. I don't think someone would write that and then be upset if you were one of a few who actually listened. I would think they'd probably be more bothered by all the people who don't listen. Bring a nice card and if you really feel obligated then do a book or a small gift card.



I agree with this. A book is always welcome or a small gc. $100 is too much imo.

Posted 10/12/14 8:57 PM
 

LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!

Member since 5/05

19458 total posts

Name:
L

Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

I would have a tree planted in honor of the child's first birthday. You can enclose the certificate in a card. Alternatively, pick a charity you think the child would like and donate to it. Or go on one share and get one share of stock to disney or McDonald's or something a kid would find interesting when they are older.

Posted 10/12/14 9:26 PM
 

Mrs213
????????

Member since 2/09

18986 total posts

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What to take to

I like the book idea

Posted 10/12/14 10:24 PM
 

Paramount
Sweet!

Member since 7/12

4287 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

Posted by haveaquestion

I'd bring a gift card. I felt horrible when we were the only people who didn't bring a gift to a "no gifts please" party.



I wouldn't. You did EXACTLY as you were asked. I would be mad at the dumb schmucks who did.

To the OP: I would bring a card or a bottle of wine for mom and dad. If you really felt like doing more, make a donation in the childs name to St Jude hospital.

Posted 10/12/14 10:37 PM
 

cj7305
=)

Member since 8/05

12296 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

I would def not do a gift card. I agree with a nice card and delicious dessert or bottle of something.

Posted 10/12/14 10:43 PM
 

Hofstra26
Love to Bake!

Member since 7/06

27915 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

I can't go empty handed to a party, it just feels so weird. I don't even understand this new trend of "no gifts"........I find it strange to dictate to people that they can't bring a present.

I'd probably give at least a small gift card in the card. Maybe $25? I can't see anyone being annoyed by someone's generosity even if gifts were asked not to be given.


ETA - Bringing wine or a dessert IMO is still a gift. What is the difference if I give a $20 gift card or buy a $20 bottle of wine??? Doesn't make any sense to me.

Message edited 10/12/2014 11:33:58 PM.

Posted 10/12/14 11:31 PM
 

Hofstra26
Love to Bake!

Member since 7/06

27915 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

Oops

Message edited 10/12/2014 11:33:42 PM.

Posted 10/12/14 11:32 PM
 

MorningCuppaCoffee
Tired!

Member since 12/07

16353 total posts

Name:
Allison

Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

I would bring dessert or wine as a hostess gift because it's rude in my opinion to go to a party empty handed.

I think the $100 is however over the top and showy, even more so because they specifically asked for no gifts.

ETA: I also could get on board with the book for the child, but overall, DH and I get annoyed when family and friends lavish DS with tons of small toys and junk in general. I know they mean well and I'd never say anything, but I often end up throwing a lot of that crap out because it takes up space, is clutter and he doesn't play with it.

Message edited 10/13/2014 5:42:57 AM.

Posted 10/13/14 5:39 AM
 

SHOPAHOLIC
LIF Adult

Member since 1/07

1712 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

I can't go empty handed. I just can't do it.

I feel like in most cases " your presence is the present enough" means we don't want lots of toys and clutter that we don't have space for. But people can't write " Gift cards only please" because they would be burned at the stake.
I would give a $50 gift card to a store that has everything. Amazon, target. OR barnes and noble.

Posted 10/13/14 7:48 AM
 

BargainMama
LIF Adult

Member since 5/09

15657 total posts

Name:

What to take to

I would make a donation to the organization "Birthday Wishes" in their name. I think that's a great alternative if you feel like you *have* to get something.

Posted 10/13/14 7:52 AM
 

MrsProfessor
hi

Member since 5/05

14279 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

If they say no gift then no gift. I would do a donation if you feel you need to do more. DD has been to several no gift birthday parties lately- parents have been collecting for our local food pantry so we've brought canned goods and school supplies. I love the idea and will do the same for DD's birthday next time. She wants to collect for our animal shelter. Maybe find out what charities this family supports.

Posted 10/13/14 8:35 AM
 

MsSissy
xoxoxo

Member since 3/07

39159 total posts

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Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

Posted by MrsProfessor

If they say no gift then no gift. I would do a donation if you feel you need to do more. DD has been to several no gift birthday parties lately- parents have been collecting for our local food pantry so we've brought canned goods and school supplies. I love the idea and will do the same for DD's birthday next time. She wants to collect for our animal shelter. Maybe find out what charities this family supports.




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Posted 10/13/14 8:49 AM
 

Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy

Member since 3/08

10420 total posts

Name:
Momx100

Re: What to take to "your presence is the best gift" party?

Posted by MorningCuppaCoffee

I would bring dessert or wine as a hostess gift because it's rude in my opinion to go to a party empty handed.

I think the $100 is however over the top and showy, even more so because they specifically asked for no gifts.

ETA: I also could get on board with the book for the child, but overall, DH and I get annoyed when family and friends lavish DS with tons of small toys and junk in general. I know they mean well and I'd never say anything, but I often end up throwing a lot of that crap out because it takes up space, is clutter and he doesn't play with it.



This is a good friend, which is why I would spend $100. Plus I feel 1st birthday is a special bday vs others. I normally spend ~$50 for birthday gifts of good friends.

I only spend $20 for classmate gifts.

eta: Not sure if it matters but we are Asian. Asians often give $ for 1st birthdays. For DS's 1st birthday, almost everyone gave us cash or gift cards. $100 is standard.

Message edited 10/13/2014 9:01:32 AM.

Posted 10/13/14 8:59 AM
 
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