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Am I wrong to be peeved?

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LSP2005
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

I think you are looking too much into this. He is prob so automatically used to saying this is Dr. smith that it was not a dig at you. I hink you had a bad day and are over reacting. Sorry.

Posted 9/22/16 11:54 PM
 
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GoodThoughts
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by InShock

Posted by mommy2B3

I would probably be peeved too, but at least he's actually a doctor, so I feel like it's out of respect. My DS is in 2nd grade and the teacher has asked to be called Dr. So and so and I feel that's super pretentious and we all roll our eyes at it. I've had grad professors correct me from calling them Doctor, but this second grade teacher wants to be called that. I apologize for venting on your post Chat Icon



?? Did this teacher earn a doctorate in education? If so, why in the WORLD would you find it "pretentious" for the teacher to use the HARD EARNED AND WELL DESERVED title s/he worked for?

To the OP, I totally get your point. It sounds like it was more HOW the parent said it than anything.



When I was in 4th grade, the teacher whose room was next to mine was Dr. InsertNameHere. If you put in years and massive sums of money to earn your doctorate, why shouldn't you use the title for which you worked so hard?

Heck, had I gotten my doctorate, DH would be calling me Dr. at home! Chat Icon Chat Icon

Message edited 9/22/2016 11:58:48 PM.

Posted 9/22/16 11:58 PM
 

EclecticEsq10810
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by LSP2005

I think you are looking too much into this. He is prob so automatically used to saying this is Dr. smith that it was not a dig at you. I hink you had a bad day and are over reacting. Sorry.



Ditto.

Posted 9/23/16 12:05 AM
 

PennyCat
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

This wouldn't bother me, personally.

Message edited 9/23/2016 12:18:10 AM.

Posted 9/23/16 12:13 AM
 

JennZ
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Yes. You are wrong to be peeved.

Posted 9/23/16 6:17 AM
 

Jasminscent
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Am I wrong to be peeved?

I don't see what the big deal is. On a lot of the forms you fill out, there's often a choice of dr.along with mr., ms, etc. Plus, being a dr., he's called that all day long.

Posted 9/23/16 6:51 AM
 

StaceyWill
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Am I wrong to be peeved?

Like others have said, he is probably so used to saying Dr. So and So, that it just came out. I wouldn't be annoyed because I probably wouldn't have even realized he said that.

Posted 9/23/16 8:01 AM
 

scarletbegonia
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V

Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by InShock

Posted by mommy2B3

I would probably be peeved too, but at least he's actually a doctor, so I feel like it's out of respect. My DS is in 2nd grade and the teacher has asked to be called Dr. So and so and I feel that's super pretentious and we all roll our eyes at it. I've had grad professors correct me from calling them Doctor, but this second grade teacher wants to be called that. I apologize for venting on your post Chat Icon



?? Did this teacher earn a doctorate in education? If so, why in the WORLD would you find it "pretentious" for the teacher to use the HARD EARNED AND WELL DESERVED title s/he worked for?

To the OP, I totally get your point. It sounds like it was more HOW the parent said it than anything.



Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 9/23/16 8:07 AM
 

KarenK122
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Am I wrong to be peeved?

I definitely would have eyerolled but it wouldn't have bothered me too much. They worked for it and it was probably just a reflex response.

Posted 9/23/16 8:07 AM
 

BargainMama
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

NO idea why you would be peeved about that

Posted 9/23/16 8:18 AM
 

Diane
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

It would NOT bother me at all.

Posted 9/23/16 8:19 AM
 

NervousNell
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

I don't think he was trying to correct you or anything like that. Or act like he was superior because of his title.

I think he just automatically says, This is Dr so and so and probably wasn't even thinking about it.

Message edited 9/23/2016 8:21:02 AM.

Posted 9/23/16 8:20 AM
 

Kitten1929
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by LuckyStar

Ehhh, I get it. I don't think he was being rude per se, but depending on his tone I can see why it might be obnoxious. You are both equals in this scenario (if anything, YOU have the upper hand) so pushing the title really isn't necessary. He's not at work. Also, way to pass along work ethic, your kid is a little plagiarizer.



Bingo. I totally agree. It sounds like he said it condescendingly (and come on, some people love to throw their titles just to make it seem like they are better than others).

Posted 9/23/16 8:29 AM
 

BargainMama
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by LuckyStar

Ehhh, I get it. I don't think he was being rude per se, but depending on his tone I can see why it might be obnoxious. You are both equals in this scenario (if anything, YOU have the upper hand) so pushing the title really isn't necessary. He's not at work. Also, way to pass along work ethic, your kid is a little plagiarizer.



I don't think that was the same instance. She said she was calling regarding an exam.

Posted 9/23/16 8:35 AM
 

ElizaRags35
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by Kitten1929

Posted by LuckyStar

Ehhh, I get it. I don't think he was being rude per se, but depending on his tone I can see why it might be obnoxious. You are both equals in this scenario (if anything, YOU have the upper hand) so pushing the title really isn't necessary. He's not at work. Also, way to pass along work ethic, your kid is a little plagiarizer.



Bingo. I totally agree. It sounds like he said it condescendingly (and come on, some people love to throw their titles just to make it seem like they are better than others).



I was at a wedding where the b&g's friend was invited with her SO whom the b&g didn't know he was a Dr. so the place card said Mr. so and so and he bitched about it while throwing his title around.

Posted 9/23/16 8:40 AM
 

Hofstra26
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by Kitten1929

Posted by LuckyStar

Ehhh, I get it. I don't think he was being rude per se, but depending on his tone I can see why it might be obnoxious. You are both equals in this scenario (if anything, YOU have the upper hand) so pushing the title really isn't necessary. He's not at work. Also, way to pass along work ethic, your kid is a little plagiarizer.



Bingo. I totally agree. It sounds like he said it condescendingly (and come on, some people love to throw their titles just to make it seem like they are better than others).



Unless you heard him on the phone, why would you assume he was being condescending? I'm sure he didn't give a passing thought to what he said when he answered the phone, he's probably on auto pilot when he says, "Dr. Smith".

The crap people get worked up over amazes me. Who cares how he referred to himself, seriously.............WHO CARES!! People are so hypersensitive these days. If someone WHO IS A DOCTOR refers to himself as a doctor and that bothers you, then that's your own insecurities coming through and has NOTHING to do with the person on the other end of the phone.

Posted 9/23/16 8:45 AM
 

MrsProfessor
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by Sweetlax22

I think this is all about the tone.
It sounds like the tone in this case was to remind the teacher that they are a dr and maybe some how better then them.




I think so too. Granted, people like to be referred to by their appropriate titles but from the way the OP described it, it sounds like the parent wanted an upper hand.

On a slightly related note my DH has a PhD and hates being called Dr. I also have a good friend who has a PhD and gets offended if you don't use her title- I think it's because she loathed grad school so much that she figures at least she got a title out of it. Chat Icon DH also has some colleagues who get very offended if you don't use their titles.

Posted 9/23/16 8:46 AM
 

Kitten1929
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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by Hofstra26

Posted by Kitten1929

Posted by LuckyStar

Ehhh, I get it. I don't think he was being rude per se, but depending on his tone I can see why it might be obnoxious. You are both equals in this scenario (if anything, YOU have the upper hand) so pushing the title really isn't necessary. He's not at work. Also, way to pass along work ethic, your kid is a little plagiarizer.



Bingo. I totally agree. It sounds like he said it condescendingly (and come on, some people love to throw their titles just to make it seem like they are better than others).



Unless you heard him on the phone, why would you assume he was being condescending? I'm sure he didn't give a passing thought to what he said when he answered the phone, he's probably on auto pilot when he says, "Dr. Smith".

The crap people get worked up over amazes me. Who cares how he referred to himself, seriously.............WHO CARES!! People are so hypersensitive these days. If someone WHO IS A DOCTOR refers to himself as a doctor and that bothers you, then that's your own insecurities coming through and has NOTHING to do with the person on the other end of the phone.



The OP clearly stated "There was hard emphasis put on the word "Doctor". It wasn't said casually like you would if you were introducing yourself to someone."

Posted 9/23/16 8:57 AM
 

PearlJamChick
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Petticoated Swashbuckler

Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

As others have said, he is probably on autopilot when it comes to his name. If his tone was neutral, why be upset?

He didn't ask you to address him as "his royal highness", "sir" or "sultan of swing"...just by his correct title.

Edit - just saw the other post about his tone. Eh. Maybe it's a power thing, I don't know.

I do know that I'm going to have the Dire Straits in my head all day now.

Message edited 9/23/2016 9:02:00 AM.

Posted 9/23/16 8:58 AM
 

mommy2B3
2 boys 2 girls!!!!

Member since 7/08

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M

Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by InShock

Posted by mommy2B3

I would probably be peeved too, but at least he's actually a doctor, so I feel like it's out of respect. My DS is in 2nd grade and the teacher has asked to be called Dr. So and so and I feel that's super pretentious and we all roll our eyes at it. I've had grad professors correct me from calling them Doctor, but this second grade teacher wants to be called that. I apologize for venting on your post Chat Icon



?? Did this teacher earn a doctorate in education? If so, why in the WORLD would you find it "pretentious" for the teacher to use the HARD EARNED AND WELL DESERVED title s/he worked for?

To the OP, I totally get your point. It sounds like it was more HOW the parent said it than anything.



She has a doctorate in Russian literature. Sure she worked hard, but what she learned in her doctorate makes no bearing in a 2nd graders learning. I could see if the doctorate was a broader subject, that she uses that education to better prepare her students. But I'm also from a family that doesn't use titles, my brothers and I have doctorates and would never correct adults or have kids call us Dr. So and so, so everyone is different.

Posted 9/23/16 8:58 AM
 

Hofstra26
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Member since 7/06

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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by Kitten1929

Posted by Hofstra26

Posted by Kitten1929

Posted by LuckyStar

Ehhh, I get it. I don't think he was being rude per se, but depending on his tone I can see why it might be obnoxious. You are both equals in this scenario (if anything, YOU have the upper hand) so pushing the title really isn't necessary. He's not at work. Also, way to pass along work ethic, your kid is a little plagiarizer.



Bingo. I totally agree. It sounds like he said it condescendingly (and come on, some people love to throw their titles just to make it seem like they are better than others).



Unless you heard him on the phone, why would you assume he was being condescending? I'm sure he didn't give a passing thought to what he said when he answered the phone, he's probably on auto pilot when he says, "Dr. Smith".

The crap people get worked up over amazes me. Who cares how he referred to himself, seriously.............WHO CARES!! People are so hypersensitive these days. If someone WHO IS A DOCTOR refers to himself as a doctor and that bothers you, then that's your own insecurities coming through and has NOTHING to do with the person on the other end of the phone.



The OP clearly stated "There was hard emphasis put on the word "Doctor". It wasn't said casually like you would if you were introducing yourself to someone."



In any case, I don't get why anyone would be bothered by it. This whole thing falls under, "Don't Sweat The Small Stuff". This is SMALL stuff.

Message edited 9/23/2016 9:11:07 AM.

Posted 9/23/16 9:09 AM
 

StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!

Member since 6/10

21539 total posts

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Stacey

Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by PearlJamChick

As others have said, he is probably on autopilot when it comes to his name. If his tone was neutral, why be upset?

He didn't ask you to address him as "his royal highness", "sir" or "sultan of swing"...just by his correct title.

Edit - just saw the other post about his tone. Eh. Maybe it's a power thing, I don't know.

I do know that I'm going to have the Dire Straits in my head all day now.



Chat Icon Chat Icon I love that song.

Posted 9/23/16 9:13 AM
 

LuckyStar
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Member since 7/14

7274 total posts

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Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by Kitten1929

Posted by Hofstra26

Posted by Kitten1929

Posted by LuckyStar

Ehhh, I get it. I don't think he was being rude per se, but depending on his tone I can see why it might be obnoxious. You are both equals in this scenario (if anything, YOU have the upper hand) so pushing the title really isn't necessary. He's not at work. Also, way to pass along work ethic, your kid is a little plagiarizer.



Bingo. I totally agree. It sounds like he said it condescendingly (and come on, some people love to throw their titles just to make it seem like they are better than others).



Unless you heard him on the phone, why would you assume he was being condescending? I'm sure he didn't give a passing thought to what he said when he answered the phone, he's probably on auto pilot when he says, "Dr. Smith".

The crap people get worked up over amazes me. Who cares how he referred to himself, seriously.............WHO CARES!! People are so hypersensitive these days. If someone WHO IS A DOCTOR refers to himself as a doctor and that bothers you, then that's your own insecurities coming through and has NOTHING to do with the person on the other end of the phone.



The OP clearly stated "There was hard emphasis put on the word "Doctor". It wasn't said casually like you would if you were introducing yourself to someone."



Yup. I work with multitudes of doctors. Some of the best doctors in the world, actually. The vast majority correct me if I call them "Dr." and tell me to use their first name. The ones who go out of their way to identify themselves as "doctor so and so" do it for the sole purpose of being obnoxious. Maybe not every doctor to ever be a doctor in the universe, but most. I know this because they've told me.

I agree its not something to get worked up over, but isn't that what these boards are for? To vent anonymously to a large group? I think we should all be entitled to whine about silly things without judgement Chat Icon

Posted 9/23/16 9:16 AM
 

gina409
TWINS!

Member since 12/09

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g

Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

I do t get shocked by a lot of the comments on here

But I am
On this thread Chat Icon

Posted 9/23/16 9:44 AM
 

klingklang77
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Member since 7/06

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Völlig losgelöst

Re: Am I wrong to be peeved?

Posted by mommy2B3

Posted by InShock

Posted by mommy2B3

I would probably be peeved too, but at least he's actually a doctor, so I feel like it's out of respect. My DS is in 2nd grade and the teacher has asked to be called Dr. So and so and I feel that's super pretentious and we all roll our eyes at it. I've had grad professors correct me from calling them Doctor, but this second grade teacher wants to be called that. I apologize for venting on your post Chat Icon



?? Did this teacher earn a doctorate in education? If so, why in the WORLD would you find it "pretentious" for the teacher to use the HARD EARNED AND WELL DESERVED title s/he worked for?

To the OP, I totally get your point. It sounds like it was more HOW the parent said it than anything.



She has a doctorate in Russian literature. Sure she worked hard, but what she learned in her doctorate makes no bearing in a 2nd graders learning. I could see if the doctorate was a broader subject, that she uses that education to better prepare her students. But I'm also from a family that doesn't use titles, my brothers and I have doctorates and would never correct adults or have kids call us Dr. So and so, so everyone is different.



That's what she wants to be called. I don't see anything pretentious about it. I think it's good that she is teaching that to 2nd graders.

TBH, I'm a Ms. and I don't like being called Mrs. That's not my name.

I don't know maybe I'm being sensitive coming from the land of titles, but I think a Dr. (MD or not) is someone to be regarded. They publish and give a lot of info and research to the academic community. Just because someone did humanities shouldn't make it eye-roll worthy.

As a side note, here if you have someone who has earned their Professor (higher than a Dr.), Dr. and are a woman you address them like this: Frau Prof. Dr. (Mrs. Professor Doctor).

Posted 9/23/16 9:52 AM
 
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