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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name: ..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by lorich
Oh and a LI parking lot horror story... As a kid we had gone grocery shopping at the King Kullen in Levittown while visiting my Aunt. We must have gotten to a parking spot before this woman and she comes yelling like a nut that we took her spot. Keep in mind this is a family - Husband, Wife, and two young kids. Here's this woman getting irate over a parking spot. Ok, whatever. We go in, do our shopping...when we come out our entire car is covered in MUSTARD! I was I think 8 and terrified.
So here's the thing- like I said earlier in the thread- the VAST majority of Americans could use a few extra steps in their life. Trust me. So unless you are disabled, elderly or have a medical condition, I don't get the circling and circling to get a spot super close to the store. Park farther away and walk. Your body will thank you, your car has less chance of getting hit by these rogue carts or dinged by others parking on top of you, and you won't have to fight and argue with others who "took your spot".
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Posted 4/2/19 11:56 AM |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
Jacquelina
LIF Adolescent
Member since 10/11 767 total posts
Name: Jacqueline
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by MissJones
Okay can we please get off our high horses about the cart? While I'm usually a stickler about putting the cart back, I can honestly say there are times I don't. (Pouring rain or my kids are in the car and the coral is far). And I'm sure everyone here is guilty of not putting it back every single time.
Point is... Guy was nuts. Glad you're ok.
This. I find it very hard to believe everyone on here is a model citizen in public...where are all the a-holes that I encounter everyday that don't hold doors open when they see someone else coming, say Thank you and cut me off in a parking lot because they want a closer spot...puh-lease.
She admitted she was wrong and is not her normal behavior.
To OP - Glad you and your mom are OK! Its a scary world out there.
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Posted 4/2/19 11:58 AM |
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Sash
Peace
Member since 6/08 10312 total posts
Name: fka LIW Smara
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by NervousNell
Posted by Sash
Posted by MissJones
Okay can we please get off our high horses about the cart? While I'm usually a stickler about putting the cart back, I can honestly say there are times I don't. (Pouring rain or my kids are in the car and the coral is far). And I'm sure everyone here is guilty of not putting it back every single time.
Point is... Guy was nuts. Glad you're ok.
Funny story, one time I didn’t put the cart back and thought it was stable. Well I turn to walk to my car and the freaking thing starts rolling out of no where. No wind or anything. So now I’m chasing this damn cart like a mad woman in the parking lot. I caught it and put it where it belonged.
Long story short, it took more energy to leave the cart and I looked like a crazy woman. So now I put it back. I feel like there are little ghosts that secretly operate and move those things to hit your car.
OMG this reminds me of a story that I had forgotten about. Years ago, when DH and I were first dating, we were walking back to my brand new car in a parking lot when we see a rogue cart just start rolling- right towards my new car! I froze and just pointed. He started sprinting, full speed, and got to the cart just before it hit my car. It was that day that I decided I would marry him! LOL Chivalry is NOT dead!
This is a amazing. Definitely a keeper, good call
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Posted 4/2/19 12:00 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Deleted
Message edited 4/3/2019 12:02:52 AM.
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Posted 4/2/19 12:02 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by Jacquelina
Posted by MissJones
Okay can we please get off our high horses about the cart? While I'm usually a stickler about putting the cart back, I can honestly say there are times I don't. (Pouring rain or my kids are in the car and the coral is far). And I'm sure everyone here is guilty of not putting it back every single time.
Point is... Guy was nuts. Glad you're ok.
This. I find it very hard to believe everyone on here is a model citizen in public...where are all the a-holes that I encounter everyday that don't hold doors open when they see someone else coming, say Thank you and cut me off in a parking lot because they want a closer spot...puh-lease.
She admitted she was wrong and is not her normal behavior.
To OP - Glad you and your mom are OK! Its a scary world out there.
Thank you! This is exactly what I said
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Posted 4/2/19 12:05 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Parking lots are a dangerous place for cars. The carts are the least of it. On LI with all of our giant SUVs crammed into too small parking spots your car is bound to get dinged by other car doors, scratched by peoples bags, etc. I can see being pissed if you have a leased car and now you have to pay for the damage, but other than that, life is too short to worry about a little ding or dent in a car. Get over it and move on.
And nothing gets under my skin more than anyone thinking it's okay to publicly shame someone ever!!! How dare that guy scream and curse at you. I feel like this kind of behavior is becoming more and more the norm.
And for the record I almost always put my cart back.
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Posted 4/2/19 12:08 PM |
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DiamondGirl
You are my I love you
Member since 7/09 18802 total posts
Name: DiamondMama
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by Jacquelina
Posted by MissJones
Okay can we please get off our high horses about the cart? While I'm usually a stickler about putting the cart back, I can honestly say there are times I don't. (Pouring rain or my kids are in the car and the coral is far). And I'm sure everyone here is guilty of not putting it back every single time.
Point is... Guy was nuts. Glad you're ok.
This. I find it very hard to believe everyone on here is a model citizen in public...where are all the a-holes that I encounter everyday that don't hold doors open when they see someone else coming, say Thank you and cut me off in a parking lot because they want a closer spot...puh-lease.
She admitted she was wrong and is not her normal behavior.
To OP - Glad you and your mom are OK! Its a scary world out there.
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Posted 4/2/19 12:10 PM |
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lightblue
LIF Adult
Member since 1/17 2249 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
He sounds unstable for sure. Try not to take it personally and next time put the cart back properly.
I get it though. One time (when I was in college) a truck driver got out of his truck and walked toward my car went up to my window, when we were stopped at a red light, and started cursing at me for apparently cutting him off! I was so scared lol.
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Posted 4/2/19 12:30 PM |
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skew
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 6794 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by Sunny10
Posted by skew
I am confused
You acknowledged that you were aware that the cart hit a vehicle. However, it never occurred to you to check on the vehicle or leave a note if vehicle was damaged?
I did not acknowledge that. I left the cart at a complete standstill. I have no idea where it ended up and was not going to ask this crazy ass man. My concern was my mom and getting out of there. Flame away
My intention is not to flame you. I am merely repeating what you stated. The cart was at a standstill when you left it. Cart hit a car several vehicles down from yours. You assume the wind must have blown it as it wasn't moving when you left it. Checking on the car and leaving a note was something you never thought of.
Again, I am in complete agreement with you that the man's actions were inappropriate. However, you are also in the wrong.
Message edited 4/2/2019 4:22:18 PM.
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Posted 4/2/19 12:35 PM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name: Karen
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Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
I think that it's really hard to say because you aren't remembering what you said back to him which could have escalated the whole thing. No he shouldn't have yelled but the cart ran into another car, which you did not leave a note for. So you were both wrong.
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Posted 4/2/19 12:57 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
As far as everyone saying she should have gone and checked on the car and left a note - it's possible she would have done that had he merely tapped on the window and said "Ma'am, the cart that you just left there rolled away and into a car right after you walked away." Then she might have felt bad, got out, checked on the car and if necessary, left a note. But instead this lunatic scared the crap out of her and her mother, so OF COURSE all she wanted to do was get out of there. I would be shaking I would be so scared.
Yes, leaving the cart was wrong but we have all done it!!! Frankly I never even knew it was an issue until LIF. Now I know and I always return the cart. But it's not like she rear ended someone and just drove away....
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Posted 4/2/19 1:05 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by KarenK122
I think that it's really hard to say because you aren't remembering what you said back to him which could have escalated the whole thing. No he shouldn't have yelled but the cart ran into another car, which you did not leave a note for. So you were both wrong.
Not sure how I escalated it. He came up to me angry and called me an fuckin$ b$tch. Then kept saying it repeatedly. i certainly didnt respond to him in that tone. I was terrified. I never saw where the cart literally ended up and quite frankly dont regret not checking. It was either getting me and my mom out of there or dialing 911. Not only was i dealing with someone without a full deck, but he is a bully as Im sure if my dh or brother was there he would not have come up to my car and attacked me like that.
Message edited 4/2/2019 3:40:00 PM.
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Posted 4/2/19 1:08 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by lululu
As far as everyone saying she should have gone and checked on the car and left a note - it's possible she would have done that had he merely tapped on the window and said "Ma'am, the cart that you just left there rolled away and into a car right after you walked away." Then she might have felt bad, got out, checked on the car and if necessary, left a note. But instead this lunatic scared the crap out of her and her mother, so OF COURSE all she wanted to do was get out of there. I would be shaking I would be so scared.
Yes, leaving the cart was wrong but we have all done it!!! Frankly I never even knew it was an issue until LIF. Now I know and I always return the cart. But it's not like she rear ended someone and just drove away....
Thank you! Yes!
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Posted 4/2/19 1:09 PM |
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2BadSoSad
LIF Adult
Member since 8/12 6791 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
She doesn't need a lecture about the cart, so you don't leave your cart (neither do I) but I KNOW I do OTHER things that aren't perfect and annoy other people so I am not going to get on some pedestal and lecture her on the cart unless I am PERFECT in every aspect of my life. I am not.
Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK for ANYONE to approach you, screaming like a lunatic and making you feel threatened or unsafe! I repeat, under NO ORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK to become completely unhinged in public and approach, scream or intimidate another person. I am sorry that happened to you and I am glad it didn't become anything more serious. Next time, just drive away. Luckily, he didn't escalate it more.
When people harp on her not putting her cart back and make excuses for another person being threatening and screaming at a woman over a CART is where the real issue lies.
Message edited 4/2/2019 2:18:39 PM.
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Posted 4/2/19 2:18 PM |
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LI2VA
Love my life!!
Member since 11/05 3125 total posts
Name: Melissa
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by Sunny10
Where are all the people that leave 20 carts I see in each parking lot? Wow, just wanted to see how others woukd have handled this unfortunate situation that ruined my day here. I guess I deserved this terrifying verbal assault from a stranger at my car consudering what I did, didnt put my cart back. It was illegal what he did vs me leaving a cart. Shocked this turned into me being so horrible as not to put a cart back
Him yelling at you, using profanities is illegal? What law did he break exactly?
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Posted 4/2/19 2:23 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by LI2VA
Posted by Sunny10
Where are all the people that leave 20 carts I see in each parking lot? Wow, just wanted to see how others woukd have handled this unfortunate situation that ruined my day here. I guess I deserved this terrifying verbal assault from a stranger at my car consudering what I did, didnt put my cart back. It was illegal what he did vs me leaving a cart. Shocked this turned into me being so horrible as not to put a cart back
Him yelling at you, using profanities is illegal? What law did he break exactly?
Approaching my car in a threatening manner and calling me what he did is harassment at the very least.
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Posted 4/2/19 2:32 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by 2BadSoSad
She doesn't need a lecture about the cart, so you don't leave your cart (neither do I) but I KNOW I do OTHER things that aren't perfect and annoy other people so I am not going to get on some pedestal and lecture her on the cart unless I am PERFECT in every aspect of my life. I am not.
Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK for ANYONE to approach you, screaming like a lunatic and making you feel threatened or unsafe! I repeat, under NO ORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK to become completely unhinged in public and approach, scream or intimidate another person. I am sorry that happened to you and I am glad it didn't become anything more serious. Next time, just drive away. Luckily, he didn't escalate it more.
When people harp on her not putting her cart back and make excuses for another person being threatening and screaming at a woman over a CART is where the real issue lies.
Thank you so much for understanding my point and posting this. I never thought coming here I would get a lecture about the cart. I’m still very upset and am trying to grasp how to handle a threatening sutuation should I be unlucky for it to happen again. This caught me offguard.
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Posted 4/2/19 2:35 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name: ..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by 2BadSoSad
She doesn't need a lecture about the cart, so you don't leave your cart (neither do I) but I KNOW I do OTHER things that aren't perfect and annoy other people so I am not going to get on some pedestal and lecture her on the cart unless I am PERFECT in every aspect of my life. I am not.
Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK for ANYONE to approach you, screaming like a lunatic and making you feel threatened or unsafe! I repeat, under NO ORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK to become completely unhinged in public and approach, scream or intimidate another person. I am sorry that happened to you and I am glad it didn't become anything more serious. Next time, just drive away. Luckily, he didn't escalate it more.
When people harp on her not putting her cart back and make excuses for another person being threatening and screaming at a woman over a CART is where the real issue lies.
Nowhere in this thread did anyone say the man was right. I, for one, stated several times that he was a "madman" and he had no right to approach her like that. Someone had said- you are both wrong. You for not putting the cart back and him for acting like a psychopath. He is MORE wrong obviously. But i don't see anyone excusing his behavior.
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Posted 4/2/19 2:38 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by Sunny10
Posted by 2BadSoSad
She doesn't need a lecture about the cart, so you don't leave your cart (neither do I) but I KNOW I do OTHER things that aren't perfect and annoy other people so I am not going to get on some pedestal and lecture her on the cart unless I am PERFECT in every aspect of my life. I am not.
Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK for ANYONE to approach you, screaming like a lunatic and making you feel threatened or unsafe! I repeat, under NO ORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK to become completely unhinged in public and approach, scream or intimidate another person. I am sorry that happened to you and I am glad it didn't become anything more serious. Next time, just drive away. Luckily, he didn't escalate it more.
When people harp on her not putting her cart back and make excuses for another person being threatening and screaming at a woman over a CART is where the real issue lies.
Thank you so much for understanding my point and posting this. I never thought coming here I would get a lecture about the cart. I’m still very upset and am trying to grasp how to handle a threatening sutuation should I be unlucky for it to happen again. This caught me offguard.
Funny, because I actually knew the second I read your post that people would start cart shaming you! Lol
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Posted 4/2/19 2:42 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by lululu
Posted by Sunny10
Posted by 2BadSoSad
She doesn't need a lecture about the cart, so you don't leave your cart (neither do I) but I KNOW I do OTHER things that aren't perfect and annoy other people so I am not going to get on some pedestal and lecture her on the cart unless I am PERFECT in every aspect of my life. I am not.
Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK for ANYONE to approach you, screaming like a lunatic and making you feel threatened or unsafe! I repeat, under NO ORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK to become completely unhinged in public and approach, scream or intimidate another person. I am sorry that happened to you and I am glad it didn't become anything more serious. Next time, just drive away. Luckily, he didn't escalate it more.
When people harp on her not putting her cart back and make excuses for another person being threatening and screaming at a woman over a CART is where the real issue lies.
Thank you so much for understanding my point and posting this. I never thought coming here I would get a lecture about the cart. I’m still very upset and am trying to grasp how to handle a threatening sutuation should I be unlucky for it to happen again. This caught me offguard.
Funny, because I actually knew the second I read your post that people would start cart shaming you! Lol
I wasnt prepared for this. I plan on deleting it. Nobody deserves what I experienced over a cart. I would like to know where all the people are with all the parking spaces I attempt to turn in and cant because there are carts in the spaces
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Posted 4/2/19 2:56 PM |
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mrsrainbow
LIF Adult
Member since 1/17 1465 total posts
Name:
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Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
This thread really highlights the la la land mentality of a lot of people on here.
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Posted 4/2/19 2:59 PM |
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MC09
arrrghhh!!!!
Member since 2/09 5674 total posts
Name: Me speaks pirate!
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by Sunny10
Posted by 2BadSoSad
She doesn't need a lecture about the cart, so you don't leave your cart (neither do I) but I KNOW I do OTHER things that aren't perfect and annoy other people so I am not going to get on some pedestal and lecture her on the cart unless I am PERFECT in every aspect of my life. I am not.
Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK for ANYONE to approach you, screaming like a lunatic and making you feel threatened or unsafe! I repeat, under NO ORDINARY CIRCUMSTANCES is it OK to become completely unhinged in public and approach, scream or intimidate another person. I am sorry that happened to you and I am glad it didn't become anything more serious. Next time, just drive away. Luckily, he didn't escalate it more.
When people harp on her not putting her cart back and make excuses for another person being threatening and screaming at a woman over a CART is where the real issue lies.
Thank you so much for understanding my point and posting this. I never thought coming here I would get a lecture about the cart. I’m still very upset and am trying to grasp how to handle a threatening sutuation should I be unlucky for it to happen again. This caught me offguard.
Oh honey, you have to know coming on this particular forum the majority of posters would ONLY harp on the cart thing and completely ignore the insane man thing (and there were some posters who completely ignored the screaming man part and only commented on how they are upstanding citizens always returning carts or saying what if the man had his car smashed by a cart in the past and he's reacting to his past experiences). She said she parked the cart on a grassy patch, it's not like she left it behind a car trunk. And she has acknowleged she was wrong not to return it and that she usually does, but of course on this board everyone has to keep reminding her she was wrong post after post.
Also, those harping on the fact she drove away without leaving a note.. why would she get out of the car to go assess any possible damage with a crazy unstable man screaming obscenities at her? How does she know he wouldn't have attacked her? You did the right thing driving away.
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Posted 4/2/19 3:01 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name: ..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by MC09
there were some posters who completely ignored the screaming man part and only commented on how they are upstanding citizens always returning carts or saying what if the man had his car smashed by a cart in the past and he's reacting to his past experiences.
So to clarify I was the one who said maybe he was reacting to having his car smashed in the past but only because she asked- "why would he care of my cart hit a car if it wasn't even his car?" So I said, well maybe....
I mean who knows why he's insane. Maybe this, maybe that, who knows? She asked why he would get upset about a car that wasn't his and I gave one possible scenario.
However I never ignored the fact that he was a crazy lunatic screaming man. I said several times that he was wrong, he was psycho, I would have been scared too and his behavior was NOT JUSTIFIED.
Message edited 4/2/2019 3:06:37 PM.
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Posted 4/2/19 3:06 PM |
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gina409
TWINS!
Member since 12/09 27635 total posts
Name: g
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
I’ll bite
You in NO WAY deserve what the guy did
He was wrong. I would have been scared too
Now in saying that
I also think your wrong for not putting the cart back
Everyone is talking about this cart shaming etc
But what really is the reason it’s not put back. I get the 99 yr old woman maybe. I will even take the woman with all her kids.
But just as a general. If you are able. Why isn’t it put back
I see so many times on this board people talk about society going to shit. Entitled people. Etc. And I don’t mean you op
I’m talking how it always comes up. Well isn’t this a part of it. There is a spot for carts. You are physically able to put it back. Should t it go back
Op I’m sorry the man scared you. He should t have done that and I’m glad you are ok
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Posted 4/2/19 3:06 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name: ..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Harrassment from stranger in parking lot
Posted by gina409
I’ll bite
You in NO WAY deserve what the guy did
He was wrong. I would have been scared too
Now in saying that
I also think your wrong for not putting the cart back
Everyone is talking about this cart shaming etc
But what really is the reason it’s not put back. I get the 99 yr old woman maybe. I will even take the woman with all her kids.
But just as a general. If you are able. Why isn’t it put back
I see so many times on this board people talk about society going to shit. Entitled people. Etc. And I don’t mean you op
I’m talking how it always comes up. Well isn’t this a part of it. There is a spot for carts. You are physically able to put it back. Should t it go back
Op I’m sorry the man scared you. He should t have done that and I’m glad you are ok
You're not allowed to say that. You must live in la la land. The part where you said the guy was wrong and you are sorry he scared her will be ignored because apparently caring about your vehicle that you spend hard earned money on not getting dings and scratches and looking like shit makes you in la la land and not in touch with the real world.
Just leave your cart against someone's bumper... it's fine. It's a first world problem. We have to walk too much in a day as it is. Why add to it?
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Posted 4/2/19 3:09 PM |
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