Age to talk about 9/11

What age did you tell your kids about 9-11? What are they learning in school at what age?

My daughter was asked to wear red white and blue tomorrow so I explained it to her. She is in first grade. I made it simple and answered her questions. I think she will continue to learn more as she gets older of course. I didn’t want to give her nightmares but I wanted her to be aware it was a serious day and not something to be silly about.

Just curious what your experiences have been.

Age to talk about 9/11

In the past the kids haven’t discussed in much detail at school but now it’s a Day of Remembrance so I think a little more will be discussed.

We’ve told our 9 and 7 year olds about it at a high level - bad people flew planes into buildings and a lot of people died - but a friend has told every detail to her kids so they’ve learned a bit more than we told them. I don’t want to tell them too much detail as DH is in the FDNY and I worked down there for a long time so I don’t want them to be scared.

Re: Age to talk about 9/11

We started talking to them about it since they could talk. I think I started with "this is a very sad day" and moved more towards the actual facts of the day as they got older. I probably told them about a lot of people being killed when they were about 4. I was there that day though and I think it's very important for the next generation to understand what happened.

Re: Age to talk about 9/11

Re: Age to talk about 9/11

Age to talk about 9/11

My DD is young but I assumed it would be a fact of life sort of thing. It’s part of our history as Americans and New Yorkers.

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Re: Age to talk about 9/11

Age to talk about 9/11

My son is 7, DD just turned 5. DS knows what 9/11 is, we explained it to him probably around 5, maybe younger. I spoke with my DD about it last night and this morning again. I told her to be sensitive that some people (thinking of school staff) might be having a hard day with memories of the day and some may even have lost friends and family in the attack. Her eyes got very big. I further explained that while it happened before she was born it very much effected many people who are in her life today.

Age to talk about 9/11

There is a documentary on tonight at 6pm on HBO regarding 9/11 and it's geared towards kids.

Re: Age to talk about 9/11

Message edited 9/11/2019 5:49:07 PM.

Age to talk about 9/11

We've talked about it ever since she was old enough to understand.
I just asked her if they talked about it in school, and she said they wrote a paragraph about it. She doesn't remember what she wrote though.

Re: Age to talk about 9/11

We have spoken to our kids about 9/11 from a very young age. My daughter especially was acutely aware of the heaviness of that day from a young age and always had a lot of questions. We were honest with them about what happened, we talked about why it's a sad, hard day for so many Americans and we also talked about all of the amazing people that came to the rescue of so many. DH and I talked to them about where we were that day, about how we felt and who we knew that was lost because we felt it was important for them to understand the very real human side of this tragic event. I didn't want them to see it as just this thing that happened but instead to understand why it was such a devastating and heartbreaking day to live through as an American citizen.

To that end, I HIGHLY recommend bringing your children to the 9/11 memorial site and museum. It is such a moving, touching and incredible experience. I cannot say enough about how it feels to be in a place that holds so much sadness but at the same time, so much strength. The survivors who work at the museum are so wonderful, they are esecially great with the little ones. We had a lovely woman sit down with our kids (who were only 3 and 7 at the time) and explain to them the events of that day and her experience as a survivor. She spoke to them so gently and made everything she told them very kid friendly. She showed them some of the beautiful artwork in the kids area and praised the heroes that day who did so much. It was just really incredible.

Now that they are older I am looking forward to bringing them back, I think it'll have even more of an impact on them now than before. Although they weren't born at the time of 9/11 I think it's important that they too, "Never Forget".

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I have to say I'm so surprised by the responses. I commend the parents who have talked to their kids about it. Did any of your kids get scared?

My DD is almost 7. We have not truly talked about it with her. We've hesitated because it's a really scary and heavy topic for her to digest. She knows it's a sad day where we remember many people who have passed away. And that we honor the heroes who saved many people on that day. But I havent talked about what actually took place on that day.

And I cannot/will not bring her to the museum for a long long time. Maybe that's my projection....I was so deeply affected and upset from visiting the museum. I would have a really difficult time explaining and answering the questions she'll have from visiting it.

Re: Age to talk about 9/11

Age to talk about 9/11

My son is 10 & in 5th. On Monday his homework was to interview someone who lived thru 9/11. Now he's known about it before. Bad people flew planes into the towers. A lot of people died. But that was the extent I thought he could really process.

Well on Monday, he got the whole story. He knows where I was when it happened. I explained to him that his grandpa was on the bridge heading into the city & saw the smoke from the bridge. He knows how scared we all were. And I openly cried explaining to him that my childhood best friend lost her father in tower 2 & how awful the funeral was. He hugged me. I could tell he really understood the magnitude. And he was able to handle it at 10. They had a firefighter & a cop visit their classroom the next day to talk about 9/11 & after our chat, he wanted to talk about questions he could ask them about it.

I have not taken them to the museum yet. I cried from the time I entered until about 10 minutes after leaving. My daughter is 14 & has visited the Holocaust Museum so I believe she could handle it. I think after our talk my son may be ready too. I'll probably consider taking them sometime within the next year. But for a child under 10/11 I don't think I would even consider that.

TLDR, summary- it probably depends on the child. While my daughter asked questions & understood younger than 10, for my son this is the age he truly gets it & is ready to really talk.

Message edited 9/12/2019 10:16:59 PM.

Re: Age to talk about 9/11

Age to talk about 9/11

6 1/2, just this year.
I did it in a way they could handle, and I explained that last night's memorial was a sad occasion, not a celebration (they distributed programs and candles)

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Re: Age to talk about 9/11

Re: Age to talk about 9/11

Age to talk about 9/11

Hailey is in first grade and she came home on the 10th asking me about it. She said what happend to those buildings that were hit by planes. SHe said the teacher told her theyd be having a moment of silence the next morning. So she asked me about it and i told her. She wanted to see a picture. I told her later when my husband got home.

She was shocked and had a wide eyed look on her face. She didnt get upset until we talked about the firemen that died. It was because my husband is a Firefighter. She asked him to switch jobs.

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Re: Age to talk about 9/11

Message edited 9/19/2019 3:38:54 PM.