Am I wrong.. party related

Here is my 'issue'. 2 weeks ago I posted on this board I took my 11 year old sister out for fun for the day. DH and I bought the invites, party decorations and favors for the 10 girls that she is having for a sleepover at my mom's house in 2 weeks.. My sister also asked if I would make the cake (I am in a cake decorating class), I agreed.

My mom is basically responsible for snacks for the kids and pizzas and drinks, bagles in the morning. My mom calls me last night to tell me what my sister needs/wants and what would I like to get her as a gift. I said that I didn't plan on getting her a gift, I am doing a lot for the party already. My mom said "oh ok, well if thats what you want to do"

Am I wrong,,, should I be buying a gift too? My sister knows that all this is coming from me, and I usually buy her great gifts.

_______________________________
edt- for UPDATE-

I saw my mom and sister yesterday... My mom's tune was totally diffrent!!
The party topic came up and she said that I was doing so much and thanked me.

I think she realized what she was saying origionally was a bit rude... LOL

Thanks for the advise ladies!!

Message edited 4/13/2009 7:40:31 AM.

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

I think it's a little ballsy to ask, since you are doing a lot already.

If you feel bad about it, maybe just get a small gift?

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

I think you are being VERY generous. However, since she is 11 - she may not "get" the party as gift concept and I would get her something small to open. That is just me and you should not feel obligated to do so!

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

I think you are being very generous but I know with my 6 y/o niece...we give money for birthdays but I still need to get a gift for her to open!!
Maybe something small...like a little purselett from NY &CO...they arent too much.

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

The thing is I will most likely wind up getting something., however it bothers me that my mom who is spending HALF of what I am is telling me what to get her. Also my mom knows I am coming over to set up and hang out for a while with the girls (at my sisters request).

This is my sister not my daughter. I understand what you are saying Matilde about not getting it, but my sister does understand that.. she asked for the cake / and matching cupcakes as her present .

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

Posted by kimbalina

The thing is I will most likely wind up getting something., however it bothers me that my mom who is spending HALF of what I am is telling me what to get her. Also my mom knows I am coming over to set up and hang out for a while with the girls (at my sisters request).

This is my sister not my daughter. I understand what you are saying Matilde about not getting it, but my sister does understand that.. she asked for the cake / and matching cupcakes as her present .

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

Thanks, I just want her to have a great time.. but I can't do everything!! I felt like my mom was being a bit pushy.

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

Posted by kimbalina

Posted by Tilde

Posted by kimbalina

Thanks, I just want her to have a great time.. but I can't do everything!! I felt like my mom was being a bit pushy.

I agree with you about your mom! LOL my mom is the same way, so I am used to it!

LOL,, Glad to see that I am not alone!

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

Posted by CoopersMom01

Posted by Tilde

I think you are being VERY generous. However, since she is 11 - she may not "get" the party as gift concept and I would get her something small to open. That is just me and you should not feel obligated to do so!

I agree.

But Kim, that's so awesome that you are doing so much for her. She's very lucky to have such a cool older sister!

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

i kind of get the whole she doesnt have anything to open thing - but if you say she understands that the party/cake/cupcakes is your gift then that is fine....

a month ago MIL asked DH and I what we were getting the kids (one wasn't even born yet) for Easter - and of course DH and I planned on getting them something small, its his sister's kids, but nothing crazy b/c its only easter - but the way she brought it up was weird....she was like "did you get them anything for easter yet" and we were like umm easter is a month away and we were kind of thrown off b/c we figured just easter baskets not presents like xmas (this would be for a newborn and 2 year old)....and then she said, "oh okay, xyz needs a new dvd player, he broke his, so i said you could get that for him" (i guess that was the conversation between her and SIL?).....so now, i guess that is what we have to get this kid its not that i mind getting easter gifts but she basically told us what to get our nephew....

Moms/MILs are weird, what can i say....

Message edited 4/8/2009 10:29:56 AM.

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

I think you are being very generous and that at her age she can understand perfectly well that parties and such can be gifts. And you did say you were also going to get her a gift, so I have to say Mom is the one off base here!

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

You're already doing a lot but maybe I'd still get a small something, like bath giftset from Kohls or something like that.

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

Re: Am I wrong.. party related

UPDATE-

I saw my mom and sister yesterday... My mom's tune was totally diffrent!!
The party topic came up and she said that I was doing so much and thanked me.

I think she realized what she was saying origionally was a bit rude... LOL

Thanks for the advise ladies!!