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If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

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FreeButterfly
hum...

Member since 5/05

6263 total posts

Name:

If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

DS's SM told him to get off the phone b/c they were going to get ices when I was talking to him today.

DS is 3 1/2.

Posted 9/11/11 8:49 PM
 

ThePinkGoose
In Your Hands

Member since 8/08

4706 total posts

Name:
Nunya

Re: If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

If we are on our way to do something and they are not discussing anything important, I have rushed them off the phone in the past. If we were just going to get ices, i'd probably just wait and let them finish but if I had my keys in my hand and we were stepping out, i'd have them finish the call later. It would depend on the situation, discussion, time of day, etc..... Chat Icon

Posted 9/12/11 10:45 AM
 

HomeIsWithU
Baby #2 on the way!

Member since 9/07

7816 total posts

Name:
Jenn

Re: If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

I can only answer this question from the POV of the BM, but if I was on the phone with my DS and his SM were to rush him off the phone for something as insignificant as "ices" I would be very upset.

This is something you should talk to ExH about.

Posted 9/12/11 1:51 PM
 

ThePinkGoose
In Your Hands

Member since 8/08

4706 total posts

Name:
Nunya

Re: If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

Posted by HomeIsWithU

I can only answer this question from the POV of the BM, but if I was on the phone with my DS and his SM were to rush him off the phone for something as insignificant as "ices" I would be very upset.

This is something you should talk to ExH about.



Just curious (I had to rewrite this because I don't want it to come out argumentative at all), if you were about to walk out the door and your DC got a call from his father wanting to "talk," are you saying that you would stand there and wait? For how long? Mind you, the child is 3 years old....how much can they have to say?

Posted 9/12/11 2:12 PM
 

FreeButterfly
hum...

Member since 5/05

6263 total posts

Name:

Re: If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

I feel its not how much DS has to say but that its the only time I get with him that day and just talking lets him know mommy is there.

Posted 9/12/11 11:09 PM
 

ThePinkGoose
In Your Hands

Member since 8/08

4706 total posts

Name:
Nunya

Re: If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

Posted by FreeButterfly

I feel its not how much DS has to say but that its the only time I get with him that day and just talking lets him know mommy is there.




Aww Chat Icon I totally understand that. I was just trying to be fair in answering your question. It must be very hard to be away from your DS especially at that age. It's not an easy situation and I always try to keep that in mind when it comes to my Stepchildren's mother. With that being said, it's a big responsibility to take on as a stepmom and I have my own schedule. When SK's are with me, there are times when we have a place to be or something to do and I tell them to finish up later. It's not intentional but AGAIN...it totally depends on the conversation, what is going on with my day, etc.

Is the problem really her making him get off the phone or is it just that you miss your DS? Could you be being a little bit sensitive to it? I'm not trying to be mean, but it's something that I have said to my SK's mother and it made her realize that the problem was not "ME" but that it's just a hard situation for all of us and we all need to be understanding of each other. Chat Icon

Posted 9/13/11 8:02 AM
 

HomeIsWithU
Baby #2 on the way!

Member since 9/07

7816 total posts

Name:
Jenn

Re: If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

Posted by AnaMaree77

Posted by HomeIsWithU

I can only answer this question from the POV of the BM, but if I was on the phone with my DS and his SM were to rush him off the phone for something as insignificant as "ices" I would be very upset.

This is something you should talk to ExH about.



Just curious (I had to rewrite this because I don't want it to come out argumentative at all), if you were about to walk out the door and your DC got a call from his father wanting to "talk," are you saying that you would stand there and wait? For how long? Mind you, the child is 3 years old....how much can they have to say?



Don't worry - I didnt take it as arguementative...this is a completely fair question Chat Icon

This is dependant on a few things. First, am I running out the door for an appointment or something time sensitive? Or am I running out the door for something such as the OP posted about - grabbing some italian ices? If it's the latter, then no, I wouldn't rush DS off the phone with his father. If I have someplace to be at a certain time and we're going to be late, then yes, I would rush him off...but I would also pick up the phone and say to ExH "Hey look, we have to be at X in 10 minutes, sorry to cut you short, is there another time today that DS can call you back to talk?"

The other thing this would depend on is how often DS gets to talk to his dad. If it's only once a week, then I would try to allow him to finish his conversation, especially if we dont HAVE to be anywhere at a certain time. However, if he just talked to him the day prior or he talks to him often enough, then I might be more inclined to rush him off, KWIM?

It sounds like the OP doesnt get to talk to her DC very often and the SM was just taking DC out for ices. In this particular situation I would be very upset as the BM to be rushed off the phone when I dont get to speak to my child very often.

Posted 9/13/11 11:05 AM
 

ThePinkGoose
In Your Hands

Member since 8/08

4706 total posts

Name:
Nunya

Re: If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

Posted by HomeIsWithU

Posted by AnaMaree77

Posted by HomeIsWithU

I can only answer this question from the POV of the BM, but if I was on the phone with my DS and his SM were to rush him off the phone for something as insignificant as "ices" I would be very upset.

This is something you should talk to ExH about.



Just curious (I had to rewrite this because I don't want it to come out argumentative at all), if you were about to walk out the door and your DC got a call from his father wanting to "talk," are you saying that you would stand there and wait? For how long? Mind you, the child is 3 years old....how much can they have to say?



Don't worry - I didnt take it as arguementative...this is a completely fair question Chat Icon

This is dependant on a few things. First, am I running out the door for an appointment or something time sensitive? Or am I running out the door for something such as the OP posted about - grabbing some italian ices? If it's the latter, then no, I wouldn't rush DS off the phone with his father. If I have someplace to be at a certain time and we're going to be late, then yes, I would rush him off...but I would also pick up the phone and say to ExH "Hey look, we have to be at X in 10 minutes, sorry to cut you short, is there another time today that DS can call you back to talk?"

The other thing this would depend on is how often DS gets to talk to his dad. If it's only once a week, then I would try to allow him to finish his conversation, especially if we dont HAVE to be anywhere at a certain time. However, if he just talked to him the day prior or he talks to him often enough, then I might be more inclined to rush him off, KWIM?

It sounds like the OP doesnt get to talk to her DC very often and the SM was just taking DC out for ices. In this particular situation I would be very upset as the BM to be rushed off the phone when I dont get to speak to my child very often.



OK, yes, I think we are saying the same exact thing Chat Icon

100% agreed!

Posted 9/13/11 11:53 AM
 

FreeButterfly
hum...

Member since 5/05

6263 total posts

Name:

Re: If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

Thanks guys - I think as a BM, the SM is always wrong anyway so I was probably being a little over sensitive. She is getting to spend time with MY son.

Also, if they told me they were leaving I would have understood better then her telling DS to get off the phone.

Posted 9/13/11 4:12 PM
 

Onemoretime
LIF Adult

Member since 9/12

1077 total posts

Name:

Re: If SC is talking to BM do you interupt?

Posted by HomeIsWithU

I can only answer this question from the POV of the BM, but if I was on the phone with my DS and his SM were to rush him off the phone for something as insignificant as "ices" I would be very upset.

This is something you should talk to ExH about.



Ita

I would def speak to exH about this Chat Icon

Posted 10/9/12 9:00 PM
 
 

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