How many people did you tell?

I told my close friends and my close family members about my two m/c's... And im the type of person who needs to share things. My husband, on the other hand, thinks that I have told too many people and this is something that is private. I am just wondering how you all handled it?

How many people did you tell?

I think that it is a very private experience. However, this happens to so many women and it is taboo because NO One talks about it. When the wound was still very fresh I didn't talk about it, but I don't keep it a secret anymore. (granted I usually only talk about it with women) but I find that I feel better and they feel better too.

Re: How many people did you tell?

Everyone knew about my first loss because I was already in the 17th week... so people knew I was pregnant. It was awful, I had to explain it to everyone, from my students (I was a teacher at the time) to the women at my nail salon. When I say everyone knew -- I mean EVERYONE .. even my old man neighbor.

I was a little more private about my losses after that, but only because I was more cautious about announcing my pregnancies. This is my 5th pregnancy and my best friend still does not know.

Re: How many people did you tell?

When I had my loss last November, I told our really close friends (about 8 people)- the ones we hang out with the most, and our families. We chose to tell these people because we are closest with them and wanted them to be aware of any potential meltdowns from me (of which there were plenty). Plus one of my close friends was also pregnant at the time and I wasn't handling that very well. It all worked out in the end. We only told other people if a situation arose that would need explaining. Otherwise, we were very private about it. It's completely up to you. We felt that telling people was the right way to go for us. I know that if I would've kept that private, people wouldn't have understood. Plus it took us a while after the miscarriage to concieve again and the whole thing was very frustrating and upsetting. It was so much easier that everyone knew the situation.

Re: How many people did you tell?

With the first one I didn't tell anyone right away. The second time I told my mom right away, but only b/c I had to go pick up my DS at her house the day it happened and I was devastated and she could tell.

Since then I've told my best friend and 2 other mommy friends.

It's really a personal decision though.

How many people did you tell?

I told ppl in my circle of friends or ppl that I would talk about their own experiences. I had NO clue how common miscarriages are until I opened up about mine. Its something I share b/c I know some went through it too.. and I want them to have hope like I did or be able to feel like they are not alone.

Re: How many people did you tell?

Thanks for all of your replies. I think I maybe have been too open about it.
That's what I feel comfortable with, But my husband believes it is a more private experience and thing to go through.
I also have issues with him telling people…
So, I am keeping quiet for now!

Re: How many people did you tell?

I'm on the other end. I blogged about it and will speak about it to whoever wants to know.

Personally, I think it's amazing how many people have m/c once you start talking about it. For me it helped me feel not so alone about it.

Here are all the posts about my 2 losses

But alot of people feel like your husband. Keeping it inside for me felt like I was keeping a secret. I wanted others to understand why I felt sad...and It also helped to have people give me hugs and say they were sorry...

but I may be in the minority.

Re: How many people did you tell?

I told my mom, brother, and one close friend. I think DH cares more about not telling people than I do, so I'm just trying to respect his wishes. Sometimes I really want to tell more people when they start asking me if I'm pregnant yet.

Re: How many people did you tell?

Re: How many people did you tell?

Everyone knew about my 1st loss because I was 23 weeks. My second I didn't really tell anyone. I told my BFF who helped me with my kids when me and DH were at the hospital etc. Eventually after the fact I told 2 more of my close friends when we were talking but that's about it.

Dealing with my first loss so publically, I wanted my second loss to be private.

But it is whatever you feel comfortable with. It's your body, your the one who physically went through it. If you want to share it with the world, that's your choice.

Re: How many people did you tell?

With my first only told my immediate family and one good friend then with my second I told a few more friends and with my third only immediate family- i contemplated not telling anyone on my last as I was so tired of being the one that always bears bad news but my mom would have guessed straight away so I told my family. Its tough as some people find it easier to tell people but for me I didn't feel able to speak about my losses ( I always cry even now) and I am very careful that my two kids dont hear about it.