New to Group-Need your help!! Please read!

Hello everyone. I could really use your help and thoughts in regards to my 5 year old son. Sorry-a little long.
My son does very well in preschool and is reading, is social ( that used to be a huge issue-was very shy), and always compliant. The only thing the teacher sees is nervousness on starting new topics and self doubt as if he has to do whatever he's doing perfectly.
At home, he is very different. Very demanding ( always has been), non self directed, often non compliant, appears to not be able to control strong impulses and anger, has tantrums and throws things and often annoys his 2 year old brother and regresses to his level when around him. He is very verbal and can talk about his feelings, however, to me it appears as if he cannot control impulses. His behavior is often out of control.
He has been diagnosed with some mild anxiety and sensory issues. We also saw Dr. Addesman at Cohen's, who didn't diagnose him with anything in particular, just said he is oppositional, possibly a little anxiety. He suggested therapy.
My personal thoughts are that he has some anxiety, sensory issues, oppositional, possibly ADHD ( no one else agrees with me on that) and sometimes I think a mood disorder or bipolar.
-The First question is: has anyone ever used Jill Soneklar at Cohen's for therapy for their child and have any thoughts on her? ( I am aware she doesn't take insurance).
-Second question: has anyone used NYU Langome child study center, the office in lake success? Besides behavior modification they do PCIT therapy in which studies have shown oppositional children relate to very well.
-Lastly, my son also has food allergies (dairy and tree nuts) and sometimes I think his behavior is linked to nutritional deficiencies. Can anyone shed any light on that or their experience?
Thanks so much.

Re: New to Group-Need your help!! Please read!

DS has a lot of the same issues.

We recently met with another DP at Cohen's who diagnosed him with ADHD mixed type and the other stuff as well.

I can bump the thread for you.

She had a meds discussion with us as well but we are holding off on that now.

My plan is to meet with the school psychologist over the summer before he begins K and see how he does in school and then go from there.

A big part of it too is I think he is overly smart and gets bored very easily. Also everyone needs to be on the same page with his behaviors which I know is not always the case.

I have heard of Jill and have spoken to her before (I actually work for the health system).

Personally, I don't think we're there yet for her program.

It's pretty intensive and a huge commitment.

I want to say it's like 2 or 3 sessions a week and I believe the kids are also slightly older.

ETA: at the suggestion of Dr. P I had him screened again for nutritional stuff and all came back normal. We thought that as well because the boy rarely will eat meat and veggies.

Message edited 5/23/2014 5:13:21 AM.

Re: New to Group-Need your help!! Please read!

Yes, I absolutely believe that "allergies/immune system" are connected to behavior. Neurobiology is a relatively new field, quite extraordinary and overwhelming once you delve into it. You may want to consider seeking out an integrative ped who can look at your child 'holistically" and perhaps conduct tests that go beyond typical labs for bloodwork.

And "environment changes behavior", many kids can hold it together in school. Sometimes it's the very compliant ones that fall apart the most at home :)

New to Group-Need your help!! Please read!

We did NYU Langone's PCIT therapy. My son was older (6) but started showing signs of Oppositional Defiance in nursery school but didn't get him evaluated later (all his teachers advised it was likely just a developmental delay). Did it work? The jury is still out. When things came to a head I threw every ounce of energy into researching causes, trying new things etc and what really works for my son is OT to address his sensory seeking needs & sensory breaks at school.

FM if you want more info on PCIT at NYU. In a family with multiple children and both parents working full time in NYC it was very very draining (time, emotionally and financially). I'm happy to share my experiences with you if it can help.

New to Group-Need your help!! Please read!

Thank you so much everyone for your replies.
yama405, I would really like to speak with you further. I private messaged you ( home I did it right) so we can speak.
Morningcupacoffee, our children sound very similar. I am wondering how he will do in K as well. My fear is as he moves up grades, it may be harder to hold it together.
Saphire

New to Group-Need your help!! Please read!

Sapphire, I agree. Is there anyone integrative ped that you would recommend? Thanks so much.