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Christine2
LIF Adult
Member since 2/09 1217 total posts
Name:
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Bus stop drama
My neighbors are all really friendly with each other, but DH and I are pretty busy, work all the time and are not very close with any of them. We are friendly, share a few words, but not much more.
The bus is in front of my house, but the bus door is on my neighbor's side. The last few times we spoke a little and I even crossed to her side.
Today I cross to her side, another neighbor and she are involved in conversation and do not even acknowledge me or my children. Even their children do not interact with mine. They were the middle of her driveway and I was standing at the end. I felt uncomfortable going into her driveway without even a hello. It was so awkward even my kids made mention saying "they aren't talking with us." It was so uncomfortable. I said a quick "Hey guys" after the bus left, but then went on my way.
I have to say, I was insulted. It was very rude. I'm not super social, but I would at least include or acknowledge a neighbor. Should I just stay on my side from now on? I wouldn't want a repeat of that. It was awful.
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Posted 9/13/21 9:47 PM  |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
I would continue to go to their side of the street. The more you do it the more they will include you. If you have been standing on your side the whole time they probably think you don’t want to be bothered with them. They might even think you are being rude by not coming to the other side of the street. I would just walk over with your kids tomorrow and walk right up and say good morning and ask them how they are doing.
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| Posted 9/13/21 10:50 PM |
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BFNY516
LIF Adult
Member since 7/20 1189 total posts
Name:
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Bus stop drama
I think you’re making a way bigger deal here to be honest. Sometimes people are so wrapped up in a conversation they lose sight of everything else around them. You know how many times I have witnessed two women who have ran into each other in a store and start chatting, as they are blocking the ENTIRE aisle and have no spatial awareness?
This sounds like that.
If everyone is normally friendly, keep that in your mind and don’t look for issues where there probably aren’t any. I’d also keep going to that side for safety purposes. I bet they will talk to you soon enough!
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| Posted 9/13/21 11:17 PM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7274 total posts
Name:
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Bus stop drama
I agree with you. I would never not at least acknowledge someone, even if I were deep in conversation I’d at least smile and wave.
If it makes you feel better, I don’t know any of my neighbors.
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| Posted 9/13/21 11:29 PM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7790 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
Posted by lululu
I would continue to go to their side of the street. The more you do it the more they will include you. If you have been standing on your side the whole time they probably think you don’t want to be bothered with them. They might even think you are being rude by not coming to the other side of the street. I would just walk over with your kids tomorrow and walk right up and say good morning and ask them how they are doing.
Agreed. I am in a similar situation but I am your neighbor. I didn't even realize there were kids in their house until they showed up to the bus stop. They very much keep to themselves, which is fine. Initially, the mom was a little stand offish and stood down a ways from us but then out of the blue, the mom started striking up conversation with us and now its totally fine. She must have felt as you do.
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| Posted 9/14/21 7:46 AM |
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soontobemommyof2
My boys...my everything <3
Member since 4/15 3635 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
U said u were at the end of the driveway and they were in the middle of it? How can they involve u in their conversation when u’re not even next to them? Were u making eye contact with them or they with u? To acknowledge someone or just to say a simple hi, I would need to make eye contact with someone if that person is not next to me. Maybe that was the case here? I’d continue crossing the street and wait for the bus with the other parents, like others have said eventually conversations will happen.
Message edited 9/14/2021 8:27:13 AM.
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| Posted 9/14/21 8:25 AM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Bus stop drama
I would just continue to go to their side and they will start to include you. Say hello first if they do not say something. Neighbors are tricky. I live in the middle of 3 best friends. They all have been living there for 20 years and me about 7 years. They have parties, coffee on the porch, walk across my yard to each other's houses but not once have ever included me in anything. We will wave when we see eachother. That's about it.
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| Posted 9/14/21 8:36 AM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name:
Pomegranate5
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Re: Bus stop drama
I'm going to assume that because you've kept your distance in the past, they may interpret that as you being standoffish and not interested in chatting. Or maybe they were just in a personal conversation that would have been awkward to include you in. Or maybe they are actually very rude lol.
Keep going to their side. Make the effort to go over a minute or two early and start up conversations and see if it changes.
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| Posted 9/14/21 9:05 AM |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7180 total posts
Name:
Katherine
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Bus stop drama
I think you’re totally overthinking it. You didn’t acknowledge them either, it’s not like you said hello and they ignored you.
I’m sure it’ll get better over time.
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| Posted 9/14/21 9:36 AM |
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kmr6107
LIF Toddler
Member since 7/07 463 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
Posted by KarenK122
I would just continue to go to their side and they will start to include you. Say hello first if they do not say something. Neighbors are tricky. I live in the middle of 3 best friends. They all have been living there for 20 years and me about 7 years. They have parties, coffee on the porch, walk across my yard to each other's houses but not once have ever included me in anything. We will wave when we see eachother. That's about it.
That's really rude that they walk across your yard to each other's house.
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| Posted 9/14/21 12:30 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by KarenK122
I would just continue to go to their side and they will start to include you. Say hello first if they do not say something. Neighbors are tricky. I live in the middle of 3 best friends. They all have been living there for 20 years and me about 7 years. They have parties, coffee on the porch, walk across my yard to each other's houses but not once have ever included me in anything. We will wave when we see eachother. That's about it.
That's really rude that they walk across your yard to each other's house.
Really? I would never care if someone walked across my yard to get to my neighbors house and my yard isn't even big. I'm assuming it's the front yard but even if it was the backyard I wouldn't care!
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| Posted 9/14/21 12:37 PM |
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kmr6107
LIF Toddler
Member since 7/07 463 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
Posted by lululu
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by KarenK122
I would just continue to go to their side and they will start to include you. Say hello first if they do not say something. Neighbors are tricky. I live in the middle of 3 best friends. They all have been living there for 20 years and me about 7 years. They have parties, coffee on the porch, walk across my yard to each other's houses but not once have ever included me in anything. We will wave when we see eachother. That's about it.
That's really rude that they walk across your yard to each other's house.
Really? I would never care if someone walked across my yard to get to my neighbors house and my yard isn't even big. I'm assuming it's the front yard but even if it was the backyard I wouldn't care!
To me it is. That's what sidewalks are for or the street if you don't have sidewalks. Everyone has their own opinions on what rude is.
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| Posted 9/14/21 12:56 PM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: Bus stop drama
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by lululu
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by KarenK122
I would just continue to go to their side and they will start to include you. Say hello first if they do not say something. Neighbors are tricky. I live in the middle of 3 best friends. They all have been living there for 20 years and me about 7 years. They have parties, coffee on the porch, walk across my yard to each other's houses but not once have ever included me in anything. We will wave when we see eachother. That's about it.
That's really rude that they walk across your yard to each other's house.
Really? I would never care if someone walked across my yard to get to my neighbors house and my yard isn't even big. I'm assuming it's the front yard but even if it was the backyard I wouldn't care!
To me it is. That's what sidewalks are for or the street if you don't have sidewalks. Everyone has their own opinions on what rude is.
I actually don't mind. I said it more of a visual for my example than a complaint. My grass sucks anyway lol.
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| Posted 9/14/21 1:29 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
Posted by KarenK122
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by lululu
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by KarenK122
I would just continue to go to their side and they will start to include you. Say hello first if they do not say something. Neighbors are tricky. I live in the middle of 3 best friends. They all have been living there for 20 years and me about 7 years. They have parties, coffee on the porch, walk across my yard to each other's houses but not once have ever included me in anything. We will wave when we see eachother. That's about it.
That's really rude that they walk across your yard to each other's house.
Really? I would never care if someone walked across my yard to get to my neighbors house and my yard isn't even big. I'm assuming it's the front yard but even if it was the backyard I wouldn't care!
To me it is. That's what sidewalks are for or the street if you don't have sidewalks. Everyone has their own opinions on what rude is.
I actually don't mind. I said it more of a visual for my example than a complaint. My grass sucks anyway lol.
Yeah I wouldn't care. We don't have sidewalks and stuff like that doesn't bother me. It's odd to me the things that people would take the time to get upset about. Life is short. Who cares who walks on your lawn?
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| Posted 9/14/21 1:38 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
I am going to put this out there about the topic of neighbors. I moved in before I had kids and then a bunch of young families with kids the same ages moved in the next few years. We are all really tight. Throughout the years more people have moved to our neighborhood. Some have become part of our group, some have not. I was told by a friend of mine that some of the newer people in our neighborhood find us rude and exclusive which really took me by surprise. We will basically include anyone that wants to be included but we don't just start inviting everyone that moves to the neighborhood to the things that we are doing. I think if someone wants to be included they need to make an effort. Invite people over for playdates or a BBQ. Ask what we are up to. Express a desire to be invited if we are having drinks. I just don't have it on my radar to start inviting everyone to anything that I plan. Just putting that out there.
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| Posted 9/14/21 1:43 PM |
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JME78
LIF Adult
Member since 11/09 3672 total posts
Name:
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Bus stop drama
I don't think they did anything rude? They were in a conversation with each other.
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| Posted 9/14/21 2:26 PM |
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clotheshorse
LIF Adult
Member since 5/12 1293 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
Next time, just wave and say hello if no eye contact. That way you feel better knowing YOU acknowledged them. If they are impolite & do not say hello back to you, then you know they just aren't as friendly. I really don't think there's any drama, just different personalities maybe.
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| Posted 9/14/21 2:46 PM |
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kmr6107
LIF Toddler
Member since 7/07 463 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
Posted by lululu
Posted by KarenK122
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by lululu
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by KarenK122
I would just continue to go to their side and they will start to include you. Say hello first if they do not say something. Neighbors are tricky. I live in the middle of 3 best friends. They all have been living there for 20 years and me about 7 years. They have parties, coffee on the porch, walk across my yard to each other's houses but not once have ever included me in anything. We will wave when we see eachother. That's about it.
That's really rude that they walk across your yard to each other's house.
Really? I would never care if someone walked across my yard to get to my neighbors house and my yard isn't even big. I'm assuming it's the front yard but even if it was the backyard I wouldn't care!
To me it is. That's what sidewalks are for or the street if you don't have sidewalks. Everyone has their own opinions on what rude is.
I actually don't mind. I said it more of a visual for my example than a complaint. My grass sucks anyway lol.
Yeah I wouldn't care. We don't have sidewalks and stuff like that doesn't bother me. It's odd to me the things that people would take the time to get upset about. Life is short. Who cares who walks on your lawn?
Who said anyone was taking the time to get upset about anything? Someone can think something is rude without being upset. It's odd to me that you need to make so many comments about something that wasn't even directed to you.
To the original poster I would say hi to them a few more times when I went over to the bus stop and if they continue to ignore you they are just rude people and you don't need them in your life anyway.
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| Posted 9/14/21 2:48 PM |
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lululu
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 9511 total posts
Name:
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Re: Bus stop drama
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by lululu
Posted by KarenK122
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by lululu
Posted by kmr6107
Posted by KarenK122
I would just continue to go to their side and they will start to include you. Say hello first if they do not say something. Neighbors are tricky. I live in the middle of 3 best friends. They all have been living there for 20 years and me about 7 years. They have parties, coffee on the porch, walk across my yard to each other's houses but not once have ever included me in anything. We will wave when we see eachother. That's about it.
That's really rude that they walk across your yard to each other's house.
Really? I would never care if someone walked across my yard to get to my neighbors house and my yard isn't even big. I'm assuming it's the front yard but even if it was the backyard I wouldn't care!
To me it is. That's what sidewalks are for or the street if you don't have sidewalks. Everyone has their own opinions on what rude is.
I actually don't mind. I said it more of a visual for my example than a complaint. My grass sucks anyway lol.
Yeah I wouldn't care. We don't have sidewalks and stuff like that doesn't bother me. It's odd to me the things that people would take the time to get upset about. Life is short. Who cares who walks on your lawn?
Who said anyone was taking the time to get upset about anything? Someone can think something is rude without being upset. It's odd to me that you need to make so many comments about something that wasn't even directed to you.
To the original poster I would say hi to them a few more times when I went over to the bus stop and if they continue to ignore you they are just rude people and you don't need them in your life anyway.
It's a chat board. That's what people do. I think typically you (in general) find something rude if it offends or bothers you. I guess I misinterpreted. You seem super laid back and clearly not easily bothered. lol
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| Posted 9/14/21 4:08 PM |
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