Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

Unfortunately I lost my grandmother on January 11 suddenly. She was 81 years old, so at least knowing she lived a long and happy life up until the very end is comforting.

I took it bad at first, but I was ok, or at least I thought. It is so hard because life goes on and everyone around me is fine and happy and smiling, and even though I may smile, I feel like I am dying inside.

DH has been great, but then there are times where I want to beat him up b/c I just don't think he fully understands the way I feel. While I cry he will comfort me, but then also tell me that I have to stop. I know he is looking out for me and he does not want me to become depressed, but I guess the way he is approaching me is all wrong b/c he just gets me so mad that I just cry more b/c I feel like I am all alone.

I do not want to go to my family b/c everyone is having a hard time with this and everyone is dealing, I don't want them to have to worry about me. This is my dads mom, and I am heart-broken for my father, so that makes me even more upset.

I know with time it will get easier, but I feel like it is getting harder.

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

I am so sorry to hear about your loss

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

So sorry for your loss.

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

I'm so sorry.

Grieving with the loss of a loved one is hard, even if they did live a long life you feel sad, angry, maybe jealous of others who don't share your pain.

My Grandpa passed away last summer, he was 86. I understand what you're going through; it's a normal part of the process. It still hurts but it does get easier, I promise.

I know you said that you don't want to turn to your family because they're dealing with their own pain; but in all honesty I feel that's the best thing to do. It's better to turn to each other and deal with these things together; share the burden and become a closer family because of it. Don't feel guilty for smiling and laughing and actually being happy again; I think that's what your grandma would want.

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

The loss of Grandparents (especially at our ages) is very difficult because you feel (although you know otherwise) that they have been and will be there forever. My Grandmothers were 92 and 96 respectively and not a day goes by where I don't miss them terribly. My Mom's Mom (who passed in 9/08) was one of my best friends and I took it extremely hard because her loss came out of nowhere (her health was great up until a week of her death). My Dad's Mom had suffered some health issues for some time but I loved her more than words and I would give anything to see her one more time.

The only thing that heals the pain is time and the wounds are very fresh to you. You need to grieve; there is no rushing things like that. Men typically aren't wired to handle things like that the way we do and this wasn't his grandmother; his level of understanding isn't going to be the same as someone related to her.

My sympathies to you and your family

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

I am so sorry to hear about your loss.
It will be tough for a while and eventually you will start to feel better. That special person will always be in your heart.
It's OK to cry. Sometimes it's easier to deal with things when you do.
I lost my Dad suddenly in 2006 and I still cry when I think about him.
Hang in there..My prayers are with you and your family.

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

so sorry for your loss

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my beloeved Grandma a year and a half ago. I did not deal with it well at all when it first happened. I cried myself It does get easier with time but I feel like the wounds were reopened when I had my babies because I didn't think it was fair that God took her before she got to meet them. I feel her presence in my house and around me very often. Some days I still can't believe she is gone!

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

I could have written this myself 7 mts and still in pain here

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

Soo sorry about your loss.

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

So sorry

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

Re: Lost my grandmother...hard time dealing

So sorry for your loss