So very sick of the grind.

Tired of getting up at 4:30, being at a job I hate by 7:30, home by 6 feeling exhausted and unable to enjoy my time home because of it.

I want a simple, quiet life somewhere. I don't know where. A house on a lot of land near a lake or something.

My kids are older. I am seriously considering taking off when they are done with high school. My daughter is a junior, so in another year she will be done. My son is in 8th. So I have another 4 years and I could go.

Anyone know someone who has successfully done this? I'm just so tired of New York and struggling to get by to live in just an okay neighborhood. There's trash everywhere here and its disgusting.

Anyway, I'm ranting. Happy Hump Day.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

i know how you feel. For the 1st time in 10 yrs ( same job), i came home last night and cried. 12 hr days with no break are REALLY taking a toll on me. I flipped out at work and adjusted schedules on my own. Nobody gives a crap about me, so I made some changes.

If it wasnt for DHs job, we would not be living here

Re: So very sick of the grind.

I feel the same exact way. I am always depressed. I hate the commute, I hate only spending an hour with my kids a day before they go off to bed. No matter what I do I never get ahead. Unfortunatley I am stuck here for another 19 years!! haha!!
I am tired and wish I could pack my bags and run to somewhere like you said. A place without the hustle and bustle. A place where there is peace and serenity.

So very sick of the grind.

Same feeling here! The daily commute plus delays rushing to get home a workout in etc.. I lost DH so I am sole provider otherwise I would have started to look for a job elsewhere. I am so over NYC. never though I would say that but I am.

So very sick of the grind.

This was me up until a month ago. I accepted a position making a little less money but very close to home. I could not do it any more. I commuted from Port Jefferson to Manhattan for 9 years and I had enough. I was way underappreciated in my job and I came to the realization there was more to life then my job and the extra money. Things will be a little tight until we figure it all out but it is more then worth it. I never saw my children in the morning, I would be at my desk right as they were working up to get ready for school. I had a baby 7 months ago and didn't get to kiss him in the morning. It was killing me, now things have been so much better a lot less stressful.

Message edited 4/26/2017 9:08:31 AM.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

So very sick of the grind.

I had a breakdown the other night about this. It seems there are never enough hours in the day to actually enjoy life. Everything is like... get the baby read and rush out the door in the morning to get him dropped off and get myself to work... rush home to pick him up, feed him dinner, eat dinner ourselves, and get him to bed... turn around and its 9:00 and time to clean up the kitchen and prep for tomorrow... like there is no time for actually enjoying life, or enjoying time with my son. It's all a cycle of just getting through the days and prepping for the next day... is this just how life is, or am I missing something?

So very sick of the grind.

I am feeling the same way. It is starting to take a toll on me. I think I want to move out of state. But I don't even know where to start!

Re: So very sick of the grind.

I think of this all the time.
Not only do we pay some of the highest costs of living to live here, we get NOTHING for our money.
Everything is old, dirty, gray and run down.
Even the beaches- everyone raves about LI beaches- but I find them gross.
Always cold too. And the water looks brown. Totally depressing. You look at beaches in Florida and compared to LI it's night and day with the beauty.

Add in to that some of the worst weather in the nation- always raining. Always windy. Winter lasts until June.

Yeah, it's hard not to get depressed

But then I think about moving and I think- how would I make money? I feel like yeah, cost of living might be cheaper elsewhere, but so are salaries. In the end I feel like it's all relative.
Unless you can go retire on a NY pension or keep a NY salary to work remotely elsewhere, it's kind of not feasible/

Re: So very sick of the grind.

I am planning my getaway too! I have 7 years til DD2 turns 18 and if i still have no ties here i will be looking for a job somewhere warm with better quality of life

I do have a short commute and good hours but we also live in a small 2 bedroom (no good parking, no storage) so i do sacrifice space for quality time for me and my kids. I would not be able to work or commute more than i do and stay healthy and sane (especially being single mom)

So very sick of the grind.

Not so much a getaway. But dh and I bought a house in South Carolina. We leave at the end of June. We will still work and life will go on, but we are hoping it will be less stressful out of the hustle and bustle of NY.

Message edited 4/26/2017 9:50:11 AM.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

I hate living here. Hate it. The weather is what gets me the most (and the cost of living). THE TRAFFIC!!!


I lived in SWFL for 9 months. I LOVED it. More daylight, WARM weather for more than 2 months. Middle of January you could walk on the beach, go to the pool, just be outside!! Sun was always out!!

I definitely will find myself living back there again, hopefully sooner rather than later. I can deal with the less pay.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

Posted by Tulips915

I hate living here. Hate it. The weather is what gets me the most (and the cost of living). THE TRAFFIC!!!


I lived in SWFL for 9 months. I LOVED it. More daylight, WARM weather for more than 2 months. Middle of January you could walk on the beach, go to the pool, just be outside!! Sun was always out!!

I definitely will find myself living back there again, hopefully sooner rather than later. I can deal with the less pay.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

So very sick of the grind.

I do get salaries and jobs are better here. But I feel like I'm working just to make it and not spending any time enjoying what I'm working for. Does that make sense. And what someone said above about it being grey, and dirty, and overgrown and not taken care of. It is so depressing to me. When we drive through other states, the highways are mowed and manicured, there's no trash and graffiti everywhere.

I'm thinking I can take my proceeds from my house and buy something small and get any job and make it work. Maybe its a pipe dream.

Message edited 4/26/2017 10:21:34 AM.

So very sick of the grind.

Long Island is a dump. Overcrowded and mostly disgusting. You get NOTHING for your money, the traffic, weather and attitudes suck. Even with the higher salary the COL is outrageous. You can't even enjoy NYC because the cost the bring a family to a Broadway show, Yankee game, nice restaurant is absurd. The train in alone will cost you close to $100. My husband and I do fairly well, I guess, and we honestly have a hard time saving money. We want to enjoy life and everything is so damn expensive!!! I have NO idea how some of our friends survive here. I wonder if people are just living in credit card debt.

I would move in a HEARTBEAT. I am lucky enough to work for a company where I can work anywhere. My DH not so much, but he could probably figure it out and we wouldn't even be reliant on his salary if we were to move. He could probably get a 'hobby job' and we'd be fine.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

I'm starting to think about retirement. DH is retired and it is so tempting to join him.
Just can't deal with the commuting and the constant traffic anymore, been commuting into the city daily since 1980.
I stopped taking the express bus because the travel time was insane - I live in Bayside near the water and it was taking me 2 hours to get home every day, 1-1/2 hours to get in.
So I started taking the LIRR and now it's constant delays and problems, and more expensive.

I don't care about my job, it's just a paycheck, but the benefits are too good to leave. I'll just suck it up until I've had enough and retire.

I also can't stand the crime / filth / homelessness I see every day. It's so freaking depressing.
Cost of living is so expensive.

We are thinking about retiring to SC. That's as far south as I want to go. My only concern is the health care system, is it as good as we have in NY.

So very sick of the grind.

Wow....I needed to read this today. I feel the same exact way. Most of my immediate family and DHs family do not live on LI anymore. We're busting our butts to live in this house we don't love in an area we don't love...we run like rats in a cage for what??? I always think that there has to be a better way...a better place...but I just don't know where that would be. And time is just ticking on and I feel stuck here and it makes me really sad.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

My advice is to do it!!! Get through the next few years and go find that simpler, quieter life. Start researching other places to live now, start planning and dreaming about it and then make it happen. You only live once, you might as well enjoy your time!! What you're seeking can totally be your reality!

DH and I have always wanted to live in MA. We also REALLY want a log cabin vacation home on a lake that will later become our retirement home. We're both tired of the traffic and crowds on LI and overall, we just don't enjoy living here anymore. So, we're trying to leave this year and follow our dreams to MA. We want more space, a bigger home, less chaos, access to more outdoor things like skiing and hiking, and down the road.................access to lots of land so we can build our dream vacation home. We're doing everything we can to make this our reality.

I know it sucks right now but hang in there and while you do, make plans for your future. If you foster that dream of a simpler life and work towards achieving it, it will make dealing with the life you have now much easier because you'll know that your future will be brighter and better very soon.

Re: So very sick of the grind.

Message edited 4/26/2017 11:33:22 AM.

So very sick of the grind.

I agree with being sick of the grind. Constantly going. No time to enjoy most days. But I don't agree with all the long island haters. Love it here. Wouldnt move for anything.