Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

Okay, here it goes.

I love playing with DS and as a working mom I try to spend as much time with him as possible when I'm home.

But there are times when I need to get things done at a particular time (dinner, phone call, etc.) and DS has started to freak out when I am not RIGHT THERE.

I'll sit with him in the play area and wait until he gets engrossed in something and try to step out and he screams and whines and generally throws a fit - even if I'm right next to the play area or in his sight.

He's in daycare all day so he's used to someone always being around.

How do I break him of the tantrums now before it becomes an even bigger issue?

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

I think it takes some time, but you have to let him get used to it. When he starts crying - how long do you let him cry for?
Lily will cry for about 30 seconds when I leave...and then she'll usually realize there's a toy there and start to play with that. If she doesn't, then I go back in to soothe her.

(and I'm so glad you didn't make the title of the thread "Advice for getting DS to play WITH himself" )

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

I have the same problem with DS. I almost think it's something they have to grow out of. I don't know how to fix it. I look forward to reading other responses. If I walk away to go do something and he's still in my sight but not right next to him, he'll crawl after me crying and whining and then just sit at my feet crying.

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

Set him up near you in the kitchen and keep talking to him.

Edited because I didn't read correctly...

Message edited 4/7/2008 10:19:17 AM.

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

Actually it sounds like Seperation anxiety , hes at that age wher ethey rarely play on their own for more then a few minutes without looking for approval.

I bet it will fade with time. ( Im hoping for BOTH out sakes, it does!)

Do you try alternating toys?

I keep some toys away from him for a few days and then in times like that make a production of pulling them out and he usually gets excited.

Or I try to give him part of what Im doing...a paper plate keeps him busy if he thinks I have using it.

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

I let him cry for a while. He just puts his head against the gate and howls.



I give him new or different toys. Whatever was so fascinating to him in the play area gets thrown aside when I leave.

He's even starting to stomp his little feet when I leave.

I think you are right and it's separation anxiety.

The thing is if I sit with him he doesn't play WITH me, just near me. He's independant otherwise.

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

noah will scream and then be fine if I just sit on the floor and watch him...same thing and stamp his feet and hit things if I move away.

Hope it gets easiest!

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

You just have to allow him to get used to it. Make sure you vocally tell him that you're right there and you can see/hear him and that's he is okay. It takes time, but he will get used to the fact that mommy is not going anywhere is that she is just doing something.

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

When I am cooking I put DD in her high chair and put a few toys on the tray for her. She gets so into playing with them she barely notices me, but would notice if she was alone in a room which lately she doesn't like.

If I have to get something done I just set her up in the room I need to be in with something to play with and most days it's fine.

I now fold laundry in the living room instead of the laundry room so she can sit in her exersaucer. I may look for a second hand exersaucer, stroller, or highchair to leave in the basement so I can get stuff done down there.

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?

Move him with a toy to where you need to be -- eventually your whole house will be a play area!

Re: Advice for getting DS to play by himself?