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BeachMom
Love my 4 kiddos!
Member since 11/08 8346 total posts
Name:
Kristie
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
while the new "recommendation" is 2 years, there is no requirement to wait till your child is 2. I think as long as you keep they informed of the new recommendation and let her make her own decision thats the best you can do.
FYI my DD was turned foward facing at 13 months. We had no choice with 3 kids and the car seats on both sides of the car and my 9 year old sitting in the middle, she could not get into the car with both seats rear facing and my ped said it was ok to turn her at 1 year.
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Posted 8/9/10 9:43 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by tatuka
Posted by ruby
Posted by peabody
You know what, I didn't know about the new recommendation either. DS is over 2, he is 2 and 4 months. We turned him around at 18 months, but I was told at a year I could turn him front facing. I just kinda ignored it and felt better having him rear facing. I am glad I went with my gut.
The ped's really need to know about this recommendation.
When did it come out? How long ago?
There actually is not a "new" recommendation for 2 yrs old so I'm kind of confused as to where everyone is getting this from. And if I missed something then absolutely tell me. But I just went on the AAP website which is where everyone is saying this new recommendation is stemming from and as of 2010 it still says just at least 1 yr old or as long as possible. It says nothing about 2 yrs old. Yes it may be safer I agree, but just saying that I don't see an "official" recommendation to keep them rear facing until the age of 2.
From the AAP website:
Infants should ride rear-facing until they reach the highest weight or height allowed by their car safety seat’s manufacturer. At a minimum, children should ride rear-facing until they have reached at least 1 year of age and weigh at least 20 pounds. When children reach the highest weight or length allowed by the manufacturer of their infant-only seat, they should continue to ride rear-facing in a convertible seat.
Convertible seats and forward-facing seats with harnesses:
It is best for children to ride rear-facing as long as possible to the highest weight and height allowed by the manufacturer of their convertible seat. When they have outgrown the seat rear-facing, they should use a forward-facing seat with a full harness as long as they fit.
I'm really confused too, where is everyone getting this "new recommendations"? as the pp already posted AAP website says FOR 2010 "At a minimum, children should ride rear-facing until they have reached at least 1 year of age and weigh at least 20 pounds." so what's the problem? I mean if someone wants to leave their DC rear facing much longer than that it's great , but it's ok to turn them. My DD was also around 1 when we turned our car seat (and we asked the ped, he said go ahead") She was sooo miserable in the rear facing car seat at that point, screaming in pain bc she was too big and uncomfortable and her screaming while I'm driving = not being able to concentrate on driving safely. so....
and honestly I personally wouldn't like it if another mom said something to me (unless it was my sister or my best friend or someone like that maybe)
Oh and here is a LINK TO AAP CAR SAFETY
At a MINIMUM...when do you do the MINIMUM you can for your child? Especially in cases of safety
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| Posted 8/9/10 9:44 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
this MUST be the *********** of all debates EVER on this website.
I hate it. I hate this debate so very much.
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| Posted 8/9/10 9:45 AM |
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annoyedTTCer
LIF Adult
Member since 4/09 3272 total posts
Name:
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by katiebug
Posted by Ophelia
I can't b/c I don't know how to do anything gently.
I like some of the ideas posted, so, go with that. Jen2999's approach is really good.
*I* would probably say something in person b/c I am much worse over email. I am a blurter. and people can tell my tone much better face to face.
I honestly never care if someone gets offended. It's not meant to offend, so that is an internalization that is on THEM.
all you want to do is keep the child safe as possibly, and assuming that is the same goal as the parent, there should not be any issue.
good luck!! 
I am like this as well. You are not telling her what to do, so not sure why she would get offended. Telling someone that you saw a video about internal decapitation could possibly save a child's life. It is called education. Once she is educated on the topic, she can make the decision from there.
I never understand why people get so offended. I like when people inform me about something they have learned. I had someone correct me on where the latch was on my DS car seat and I thanked them profusely.
As for pediatrician recommendations, I am finding more and more that pediatricians are not informed by current studies and information. Just look at all the pediatricians who say not to start certain foods until a year. The AAP's current recommendation is no longer this stance, yet pediatricians still give out this advice.
Why do you assume she doesn't know about the recommendation?
I bet a bunch of people on this very board turned thier kids around before they were even a year old even though they knew of the new recommendations.
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| Posted 8/9/10 9:46 AM |
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4PsInaPod
My Loves <3
Member since 7/07 10079 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by Ophelia
this MUST be the clusterfuck of all debates EVER on this website.
I hate it. I hate this debate so very much.
it occurs every few months too.
I like crankypants idea. . . 
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| Posted 8/9/10 9:47 AM |
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katiebug
I'll love you for always
Member since 2/08 4624 total posts
Name:
Katie
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by katiebug
Posted by Ophelia
I can't b/c I don't know how to do anything gently.
I like some of the ideas posted, so, go with that. Jen2999's approach is really good.
*I* would probably say something in person b/c I am much worse over email. I am a blurter. and people can tell my tone much better face to face.
I honestly never care if someone gets offended. It's not meant to offend, so that is an internalization that is on THEM.
all you want to do is keep the child safe as possibly, and assuming that is the same goal as the parent, there should not be any issue.
good luck!!
I am like this as well. You are not telling her what to do, so not sure why she would get offended. Telling someone that you saw a video about internal decapitation could possibly save a child's life. It is called education. Once she is educated on the topic, she can make the decision from there.
I never understand why people get so offended. I like when people inform me about something they have learned. I had someone correct me on where the latch was on my DS car seat and I thanked them profusely.
As for pediatrician recommendations, I am finding more and more that pediatricians are not informed by current studies and information. Just look at all the pediatricians who say not to start certain foods until a year. The AAP's current recommendation is no longer this stance, yet pediatricians still give out this advice.
Why do you assume she doesn't know about the recommendation?
I bet a bunch of people on this very board turned thier kids around before they were even a year old even though they knew of the new recommendations.
So if she is, she is. What is the harm in mentioning it to her? If she knows and still turned her kid she obviously thinks that is best for her child and can say so, just like a bunch of people on this site have already done.
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| Posted 8/9/10 9:51 AM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by Ophelia
this MUST be the clusterfuck of all debates EVER on this website.
I hate it. I hate this debate so very much.
First-cool that you can say clusterfuck
ITA-there is no winning or losing here. Hopefully there are others like Jersey Panda who actually get the info, research it and decide what's best for their child/family.
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| Posted 8/9/10 9:53 AM |
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tara73
carseat nerd
Member since 11/09 3669 total posts
Name:
Buttercup
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by GoldenRod
In NY, legally, you can have them forward facing when they come home from the hospital, as long as they are in an approved car seat. There are absolutely no actual laws governing when to turn them around. The one year/20 lb recommendation is also just a suggestion.
There is actually a proper usage clause in the laws and since there is no seat on the market that will allow forward facing prior to 20lbs and only one I"m aware of that doesn't have the 1 year attached to it. So, technically, you can't put a 10lb infant forward facing since there is no seat manufactured which allows this.
I'm going to try to address what I can remember:
As far as RF not being "that much" safer than FF after 1? It was concluded via studies of actual accidents that RF is 5 times safer than FF in children under 24 months.
Here is a report from the British Medical Journal which used data collected by Swedish authorities and NHTSA which actually recommends RF to FOUR years of age. The NHTSA study was done retroactively and is where the new recommendations of RF to 2 are from.
http://www.bmj.com/cgi/content/full/338/jun11_2/b1994
The American Academy of Pediatrics' official stance on car seats has long been that children should rear face until they reach the limits of their convertible seat OR at a MINIMUM 1 year and 20lbs.
http://www.aap.org/advocacy/ncpsw.htm
On April 4, 2009, they released an article which recommends the new limit of at least 2 years of age.
http://aapnews.aappublications.org/cgi/content/full/30/4/12-a
Legs.
There has never been a documented case of a broken leg in a rear facing child from a collision. This is a myth. There have, however, been numerous instances of broken legs in FORWARD facing chlidren. Even if there were a slight risk of broken legs in a RF child?
Broken leg? Cast it. Broken neck? Casket.
Comfort/convenience.
I, personally, don't get the "he/she doesn't like it/unhappy" argument. There are many things that we, as parents, don't let our children do because they are dangerous regardless of how much they like doing them. You don't let your kid stick their fingers in electrical sockets or run around in parking lots unattended, right? No one said parenting would be easy, and there are going to be times when our kids have to do things they don't like. One of which is being properly restrained in the car. Children are not old enough or mature enough to understand the consequences of not being properly restrained. If you, as an adult, choose to not wear your seat belt you know what the risks and consequences may be from doing so. A child can not make that decision for him/herself and it is up to us as parents to do that for them. The laws are there as bare minimums, serving to protect those who are unable to protect themselves.
It seems like for car seat safety we, as society, let their wishes and wants overrule what is safest. Ironic, when you consider that car accidents are the leading cause of death for children under age 14.
BTW, September 19-25 2010 is Child Passenger Safety week. This is a great time to post information to your facebook pages or send out emails. There is also National Seat Check day on 9/25/10, you can search for an event in your area www.seatcheck.org or www.safekids.org
If you're interested in seeing a CPST and having your seats inspected before the National Seat Check event:
If you're in Nassau County, you can contact Carseatsafety Chris 516.571.1893
In Suffolk County, Hassell Auto Body on Rte 109 in West Babylon (631) 587-5500
If you're outside Long Island, you can use www.seatcheck.org or www.car-seat.org to find a tech near you or online.
Message edited 8/9/2010 10:07:41 AM.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:05 AM |
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bicosi
life is a carousel
Member since 7/07 14956 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by HomeIsWithU
Posted by ChilisWife
I wouldn't say anything. Personally I get a little offended when people bring things like that to my attention because it makes me feel like I am ignorant, or that I'm doing something wrong, or that I don't care about my child, etc. It's like when people told me "OMG you aren't breastfeeding?!?!?" Like I should be stripped of parental rights or something.
I agree. She isn't really doing anything wrong. At 12 months you can turn your DC front-facing. I did it ON his first birthday because he was a nightmare when he was rear facing. Now that he's turned around he loves the car and he's so good during car rides. Her DC is over the legal limit so I dont see a problem. I, personally, would be pretty PO'd if another mom said something to me about it.
Ditto...
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:08 AM |
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TLC1018
I AM A BIG SISTER!!
Member since 8/07 3880 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by Bops
Posted by SweetTooth
Posted by architectnycity
To be honest I don't know anyone IRL that didn't turn their DC around at 1 year. My ped told me to turn it and I went to the state troopers to have it inspected and they didn't say I should keep it rear facing either.
You could always just send the link and write A must watch for all parents. Then she can make her own decision.
I didn't - my kids are still rear facing at 19 months.
I would just send an email with the video to all your friends with babies, and say - this was an eye-opener for me.
And leave it at that. Then she can make her own decisions.
My DD is rear facing as well at 19 months
My 19 month old DD is also still rear facing.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:14 AM |
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tara73
carseat nerd
Member since 11/09 3669 total posts
Name:
Buttercup
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by CrankyPants
Tell her Gisele Bunchen said it should be a law to keep your kid rear facing until 5, but that you think she is an idiot since the new recommendation is to keep them rear facing until 2.
This?
Full of awesomeness 
I can't believe another page posted after I started my post well over an hour ago. I never realized I typed so slowly 
I just saw another post on here where someone posted about the death of a forward facing 21 month old in a car accident. Absolutely heartbreaking to me to think of that happening to ANYONE, so if I come across as "preachy" so be it. The message is getting out there as evidenced by folks who "remember Joel's video and the "Broken Leg? Cast it. Broken Neck? Casket" mantra.
I don't care if I'm the most hated person on these forums for spewing facts and information out if it helps even ONE person keep their baby safer.
BTW, DD is 2 1/2 this month and is still happily rear facing. She will be rear facing until she is 4 or until she outgrows her seats, whichever is later. Yes, she WILL be that kindergartner with "that mommy" who keeps her in bubble wrap. I made the mistake of reading an actual NHTSA study with actual crash data and it changed my mind forever on how I look at safety in the car.
Message edited 8/9/2010 10:20:00 AM.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:19 AM |
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Hofstra26
Love to Bake!
Member since 7/06 27915 total posts
Name:
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by Ophelia
this MUST be the clusterfuck of all debates EVER on this website.
I hate it. I hate this debate so very much.
I don't even see the debate. The fact of the matter is that there is NO law stating how long your child should remain rear facing or even to be rear facing at all. It's all a recommendation and at the end of the day, if she wants to turn her child at 13 months then it's within her rights to do so as the parent and she isn't breaking any laws. You may not agree with it and more power to you for leaving your child rear facing longer but you can't really going around trying to "correct" someone's parenting.
You don't know people's reasons for doing what they do with their children and there will always be someone who parenting styles or views you don't agree with. Even if your advice is coming from a good place and is completely well intentioned, MOST parents don't like to be singled out for doing something "wrong" in your opinion. I just think unless someone is doing something so harmful and detrimental to their child the best thing to do is say nothing because ultimately, it's not your place to tell someone how to parent. Whether it's a carseat issue or a feeding issue or any of the 1000 other issues you have to sort of take the approach, to each his own. In this case, at the most basic level................she's doing nothing wrong by turning her child at 13 months. End of story.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:22 AM |
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Kissy331
My two miracles!
Member since 5/06 17826 total posts
Name:
Kristen
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by Niecey
I personally think you have no reason/business to say anything. I turned all my kids at 12 mos and if someone told me I shouldn't have I would have been annoyed esp since it is not yet illegal. Having 2 kids, I can't imagine keeping my boys rear facing until 2 between their sizes at that age and personalities. If you want to say anything, I would ask if she heard anything about the new talk of saying keep them rear facing until 2 and if her doctor said anything and listen to her opinions and if she has no clue tell her what you heard or say you can send her the article you read if she is interested...any other way to me would be rude.
This is how I feel too..Without seeing it on here, I would have never known that the carseat companies are "advising" the 2 year mark now.
I think it is a personal choice all around & would get mad if someone told me I was doing something "wrong" especially when it is not illegal. I know the safety issues around it, but I am one of those mom's that doesn't believe everything she reads. I might get flamed for it, but honestly when we were growing up, we weren't rear facing at all.
Message edited 8/9/2010 10:30:26 AM.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:28 AM |
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tara73
carseat nerd
Member since 11/09 3669 total posts
Name:
Buttercup
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by Kissy331
I might get flamed for it, but honestly when we were growing up, we weren't rear facing at all.
No flaming, just pointing out that the reasons car seat laws and recommendations keep changing is that we learn from past mistakes.
Those kids who were in survivable accidents but not restrained properly taught us to do better for our kids through their deaths.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:33 AM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by Hofstra26
Posted by Ophelia
this MUST be the clusterfuck of all debates EVER on this website.
I hate it. I hate this debate so very much.
I don't even see the debate. The fact of the matter is that there is NO law stating how long your child should remain rear facing or even to be rear facing at all. It's all a recommendation and at the end of the day, if she wants to turn her child at 13 months then it's within her rights to do so as the parent and she isn't breaking any laws. You may not agree with it and more power to you for leaving your child rear facing longer but you can't really going around trying to "correct" someone's parenting.
You don't know people's reasons for doing what they do with their children and there will always be someone who parenting styles or views you don't agree with. Even if your advice is coming from a good place and is completely well intentioned, MOST parents don't like to be singled out for doing something "wrong" in your opinion. I just think unless someone is doing something so harmful and detrimental to their child the best thing to do is say nothing because ultimately, it's not your place to tell someone how to parent. Whether it's a carseat issue or a feeding issue or any of the 1000 other issues you have to sort of take the approach, to each his own. In this case, at the most basic level................she's doing nothing wrong by turning her child at 13 months. End of story.
what you wrote is EXACTLY what I meant.
it has nothing to do with one being "right" vs. the other.
the OP asked how she could do something SHE felt strongly about and wanted to do.
the answers SHOULD HAVE advised her on her question.
instead we have a debate. WHY?
if you turned your kid GGGRREEEAATTTT.
if you didn't GGREEAATTT.
we each have our reasons for doing stuff.
does it make me cringe a little at the thought of a one year olds neck muscles being made to bear the brunt of the collision b/c the head is so heavy...YES. I admit, that does give me pause and make me sad.
and that is exactly why, whether it gets my FRIEND angry or not, I would say something. and hope she understands that it is ONLY and ALL out of love and concern for the child.
and you may not like it, but the simply PHYSIOLOGICAL fact is that there is a certain disadvantage for a neck that young to be bearing the brunt of the force of an impact at that age. THAT is the end of the story.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:41 AM |
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TaraHutch
True beauty
Member since 10/07 9888 total posts
Name:
Tara
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
oops...this was innocent on my part. forgot how ugly this debate can get.
In all honesty, I know my friend won't be insulted or offended, I guess I'm most worried that she is gonna feel HORRIBLE if I show her that video. But I feel like that video is a must-see. She's a lot like me, and I know she's gonna feel horribly guilty. Hell, when I installed Riley's seat, and then took it to the police station which is FIVE MINUTES DOWN THE BLOCK...when he showed me how horribly wrong I installed it, I cried.
I do love CrankyPants' idea though I already posted Giselle's rant on FB
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:51 AM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
Name:
:)
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Ignorance is not bliss. Share the info and know you meant well, I can't see why anyone would get offended b/c someone was sharing info.
Who would think "How dare you share info that may save my child's life that I may not have known! You awful person!!!"
Yes, SOME people do not know and WOULD appreciate the info. To TIPTOE around such a topic so as not to offend a parent, that is just ridiculous.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:51 AM |
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4PsInaPod
My Loves <3
Member since 7/07 10079 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by TaraGotHutched
oops...this was innocent on my part. forgot how ugly this debate can get.
God, Tara
I think everyone knows you meant no harm at all, just looking for opinions on how to approach the subject.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:53 AM |
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oneday
<3
Member since 5/05 4319 total posts
Name:
Pam
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
I really don't know why anyone would get offended if their friend mentioned it. No, it’s not a law. No the person you tell does not have to do what you say. I think it’s really all in how you say it. If you tell someone they are an idiot for turning a child too early (***This is not in anyway my opinion, it’s simply for illustrative purposes***) then yeah, I could see why they would get offended. If you say “You know, I saw this thing online about switching your child too soon” and give them the address if they are interested, I don’t see why anyone would get annoyed. It’s not like you are telling them what to do at all. Just sharing info.
When Tylenol was recalled - it didn’t sound to me like there was much likelihood that there was a real danger in it – but it was recalled in case. So, I stopped using it as did most parents I know. A few weeks after the recall, I was just talking to a friend about DS and giving him “Tylenol” when she said, “Oh, you know it was recalled, right?” I had actually meant a generic Tylenol, but she didn’t know and she just wanted to make sure I was aware of the recall. I wasn't offended because she was just trying to let me know something I might not have heard about.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:57 AM |
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Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!
Member since 6/06 14437 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by DRMom
Posted by jellybean1420
Technically she isnt doing anything wrong...the recommended age to turn a child forward facing is 20 lbs. and 1 year.
If it happens to come up you could mention they are now suggesting you keep them rear facing as long as possible but I wouldnt go out of my way to say something.
What to consider when positioning carseats for toddlers
Lori O’Keefe
Correspondent
New research indicates that toddlers are more than FIVE TIMES SAFER riding rear-facing in a car safety seat up to their second birthday. Following are some safety tips for car seat use:
All infants should ride rear-facing in either an infant car seat or convertible seat.
If an infant car seat is used, the infant should be switched to a rear-facing convertible car seat once the maximum height (when the infant’s head is within 1 inch of the top of the seat) and weight (usually 22 pounds to 32 pounds) have been reached for that infant seat as suggested by the car seat manufacturer.
Toddlers should remain rear-facing in a convertible car seat until they have reached the maximum height and weight recommended for the model, or at least the age of 2.
From the AAP website
I've read the article. My point was it is not an official recommendation as of yet.
DS #1 was rear facing until 15, maybe 16 mo. I will keep DS #2 rear facing as long as I can as well but at some point it's gets extremely uncomfortable for them b/c their legs are so long.
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:57 AM |
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jerseypanda
Life is good.
Member since 1/07 9164 total posts
Name:
Amanda
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by TaraGotHutched
oops...this was innocent on my part. forgot how ugly this debate can get.
In all honesty, I know my friend won't be insulted or offended, I guess I'm most worried that she is gonna feel HORRIBLE if I show her that video. But I feel like that video is a must-see. She's a lot like me, and I know she's gonna feel horribly guilty. Hell, when I installed Riley's seat, and then took it to the police station which is FIVE MINUTES DOWN THE BLOCK...when he showed me how horribly wrong I installed it, I cried.
I do love CrankyPants' idea though I already posted Giselle's rant on FB
But you know what, if that is the kind of person your friend is, then she will APPRECIATE you giving her information that maybe she was not aware of. And while she may feel guilty for the short amount of time that she had her DC forward facing, she will most likely change back to rear facing because of the information you provided to her. (and be thankful that nothing happened in between those 2 events)
It's not like you are going to tell her what a monster she is or tell her that she is parenting wrong. (because "technically" according to the law she's not doing anything wrong) You are simply going to share some new information that is now out there dealing with child safety. She can do what she wants with the information, but you can rest assured that you tried!
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:58 AM |
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CrankyPants
I'm cranky
Member since 7/06 18178 total posts
Name:
Mama Cranky
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
At this point I really think we need to petition Gisele to make a final proclamation for us.
Gisele knows best.
Who will take point on this?
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| Posted 8/9/10 10:59 AM |
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katiebug
I'll love you for always
Member since 2/08 4624 total posts
Name:
Katie
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by Kissy331
Posted by Niecey
I personally think you have no reason/business to say anything. I turned all my kids at 12 mos and if someone told me I shouldn't have I would have been annoyed esp since it is not yet illegal. Having 2 kids, I can't imagine keeping my boys rear facing until 2 between their sizes at that age and personalities. If you want to say anything, I would ask if she heard anything about the new talk of saying keep them rear facing until 2 and if her doctor said anything and listen to her opinions and if she has no clue tell her what you heard or say you can send her the article you read if she is interested...any other way to me would be rude.
This is how I feel too..Without seeing it on here, I would have never known that the carseat companies are "advising" the 2 year mark now.
I think it is a personal choice all around & would get mad if someone told me I was doing something "wrong" especially when it is not illegal. I know the safety issues around it, but I am one of those mom's that doesn't believe everything she reads. I might get flamed for it, but honestly when we were growing up, we weren't rear facing at all.
I am sorry but I don't understand this argument. When our parents were children, they were in the front seat without any seat belts. Obviously our parents were not killed or injured because of this, but it does not meant that thousands of other people were not so lucky. Which is why they have the regulations they have now. We evolve and learn from our mistakes.
Message edited 8/9/2010 11:01:37 AM.
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| Posted 8/9/10 11:01 AM |
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Linda1003
love my 2 boys
Member since 8/08 10923 total posts
Name:
Linda
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by katiebug
Posted by Kissy331
Posted by Niecey
I personally think you have no reason/business to say anything. I turned all my kids at 12 mos and if someone told me I shouldn't have I would have been annoyed esp since it is not yet illegal. Having 2 kids, I can't imagine keeping my boys rear facing until 2 between their sizes at that age and personalities. If you want to say anything, I would ask if she heard anything about the new talk of saying keep them rear facing until 2 and if her doctor said anything and listen to her opinions and if she has no clue tell her what you heard or say you can send her the article you read if she is interested...any other way to me would be rude.
This is how I feel too..Without seeing it on here, I would have never known that the carseat companies are "advising" the 2 year mark now.
I think it is a personal choice all around & would get mad if someone told me I was doing something "wrong" especially when it is not illegal. I know the safety issues around it, but I am one of those mom's that doesn't believe everything she reads. I might get flamed for it, but honestly when we were growing up, we weren't rear facing at all.
I am sorry but I don't understand this argument. When our parents were children, they were in the front seat without any seat belts. Obviously our parents were not killed or injured because of this, but it does not meant that thousands of other people were not so lucky. Which is why they have the regulations they have now. We evolve and learn from our mistakes.
Yeah I agree with Katie.. when my mom took us home from the hospital she was HOLDING US in her arms!!! Should we still do that? We all know better now. 
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| Posted 8/9/10 11:05 AM |
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tara73
carseat nerd
Member since 11/09 3669 total posts
Name:
Buttercup
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Re: Any ideas on how to gently inform a friend that her child is safest rear facing?
Posted by oneday
I really don't know why anyone would get offended if their friend mentioned it. No, it’s not a law. No the person you tell does not have to do what you say. I think it’s really all in how you say it. If you tell someone they are an idiot for turning a child too early (***This is not in anyway my opinion, it’s simply for illustrative purposes***) then yeah, I could see why they would get offended. If you say “You know, I saw this thing online about switching your child too soon” and give them the address if they are interested, I don’t see why anyone would get annoyed. It’s not like you are telling them what to do at all. Just sharing info.
When Tylenol was recalled - it didn’t sound to me like there was much likelihood that there was a real danger in it – but it was recalled in case. So, I stopped using it as did most parents I know. A few weeks after the recall, I was just talking to a friend about DS and giving him “Tylenol” when she said, “Oh, you know it was recalled, right?” I had actually meant a generic Tylenol, but she didn’t know and she just wanted to make sure I was aware of the recall. I wasn't offended because she was just trying to let me know something I might not have heard about.
For some reason, though, people don't get offended when told about recalls or whatever.
There is a strange phenomenon around car seat usage. Look at how heated this is for an example. No one is being singled out or called names and people are all in a huff about it. The only other topic I've seen get as nasty and heated as the RF vs FF argument on various parenting boards is circumcision. You have camp A screaming they're doing what the law requires or that they didn't have car seats 20 years ago and we're all fine etc, some who think all the studies are a bunch of nonsense and then the other camp showing studies and sharing real life stories and research screaming back.
I had a friend make nasty comments on my FB page just because she didn't agree with an article I posted (it was one that said that most car seats are installed and used incorrectly). A totally benign article and comment about getting your seats checked by a pro and it caused this person to freak.
I can't begin to explain human nature or why this is such a hot button topic for people, but it really is. Baffling.
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| Posted 8/9/10 11:15 AM |
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