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jasmine
little boy blue <3
Member since 10/10 1475 total posts
Name:
x
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anyone else constantly asked by people...
if your pregnancy was planned?  
I think it's one of the rudest questions people can ask, and unfortunately one we've gotten A LOT. 
I realize we're on the younger side but have been together a very long time, married a few years, are doing very well financially and in our careers. Even if we weren't, MYOB!
(And yes, this pregnancy WAS planned although it did happen more quickly for us than we expected)
Message edited 3/1/2011 12:43:06 PM.
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Posted 3/1/11 12:36 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
julesrbf
Baby Girl
Member since 6/09 3882 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
My MANAGER asked me that when I told her I was pregnant. Holy inappropriate!
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:36 PM |
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Puppy-Love
LIF Adult
Member since 7/10 1394 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
I am not out yet but I feel like I will be asked this question at work.
How do you respond??????????
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:37 PM |
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MichLiz213
Life is Good!
Member since 7/07 7979 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
That was the first question out of my grandmother's mouth.
One of my cousins asked this at Christmas and my response was, "We're married, does it matter?" My grandmother was sitting there too, so it was towards both of them.
What do they expect me to say, "No, it was a mistake?" I don't understand what kind of response people are looking for when they ask the question.
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:38 PM |
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StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!
Member since 6/10 21539 total posts
Name:
Stacey
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
My mom asks me that at least once a week
I was a little rude to her last time she asked, so hopefully she will stop.
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:39 PM |
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Bops
My 3 wishes
Member since 12/07 13625 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
I get it all the time and its usually because "we already have a boy and a girl" 
Little do these morons know we are infertility patients and these babies were MORE than planned
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:39 PM |
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RocPin
Life's Beachy <3
Member since 2/08 6765 total posts
Name:
Heather
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
I think thats probably the only question I haven't gotten.
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:40 PM |
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M514
Hi
Member since 8/10 6011 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
surprisingly, no one has ever asked if it was planned. people did say they had been waiting for this news cause they figured it was the next step for DH and I.
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:40 PM |
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jasmine
little boy blue <3
Member since 10/10 1475 total posts
Name:
x
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
we usually answer something along the lines of yes it was planned but it happened more quickly/easily for us than we expected, but I hate that I qualify my answer in that way because YES IT WAS PLANNED AND WE ARE HAPPY should be enough. 
if it's one of DH's friends, DH then goes into his spiel about how we had a range of when we were hoping to get pregnant and how this was the very beginning of the range because he has very powerful sperm and we got pregnant first cycle off the pill. 
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:41 PM |
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GioiaMia
Let's Go Rangers!
Member since 1/07 14818 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
I always used to ask people this but now I try not to!
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:44 PM |
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Tiggeruth
I am a mom :-)
Member since 6/06 3433 total posts
Name:
Heidi
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
I was asked this a lot in the beginning (thankfully its stopped), actually more than i expected to be asked it, and i always said its as planned as any of these things can be...
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:47 PM |
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
I've been asked this several times already and I really can't stand being asked. DH and I have been together 10 years married almost 2, you would think if it wasn't planned it would have happened already
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:51 PM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
Posted by Tilde
I always used to ask people this but now I try not to!
It's okay, I'm guilty of this too. I guess because I've never really thought of how rude the question can be, it never bothered me and I had always heard others ask the same thing!
I think sometimes I have asked because I am always in awe of people who can actively do all the TTC stuff that would have driven me insane.
When anyone asks me, I say it was a "pleasant surprise."
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:56 PM |
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jasmine
little boy blue <3
Member since 10/10 1475 total posts
Name:
x
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
Posted by InHiding4Now2010
I've been asked this several times already and I really can't stand being asked. DH and I have been together 10 years married almost 2, you would think if it wasn't planned it would have happened already
lol I should use that line next time
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:56 PM |
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GioiaMia
Let's Go Rangers!
Member since 1/07 14818 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by Tilde
I always used to ask people this but now I try not to!
It's okay, I'm guilty of this too. I guess because I've never really thought of how rude the question can be, it never bothered me and I had always heard others ask the same thing!
I think sometimes I have asked because I am always in awe of people who can actively do all the TTC stuff that would have driven me insane.
When anyone asks me, I say it was a "pleasant surprise."
I asked b/c we so did not want children so I hated hearing about surprises. . . . I wanted to make sure that every single baby was perfectly planned and that there was NO WAY it could possibly happen to me! 
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| Posted 3/1/11 12:58 PM |
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summerbaby11
LIF Adolescent
Member since 11/10 779 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
Posted by RocPin
I think thats probably the only question I haven't gotten.
ditto. that's such a dumb question I think when you are married.
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| Posted 3/1/11 1:08 PM |
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Babylove10
LIF Adolescent
Member since 3/10 814 total posts
Name:
Doreen
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
With my ds people just assumed he was a mistake, he wasn't. We weren't married but we had been engaged for awhile. We knew we wanted a family together so we just went with it. I'm 22 and dh is 24 people always said "well i think you should enjoy youth and enjoy marriage first." I've had more wild times than most of the people who spoke about youth. AND Me and dh just got married in january and we still get to enjoy it just the same. People like to bring up the money issue too but the older you get doesn't mean you have more money.
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| Posted 3/1/11 3:36 PM |
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emomma17
All My Girls!
Member since 11/08 4392 total posts
Name:
Mia
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
I mostly get...did you use any drugs or was it natural because we are having twins.
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| Posted 3/1/11 3:43 PM |
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
alll the time!
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| Posted 3/1/11 3:49 PM |
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Ready4aBaby
LIF Adolescent
Member since 12/10 833 total posts
Name:
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
OMG , that annoys me so much. ALSO I hate people asking if we used fertility drugs or meds or IVF since we're having twins.
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| Posted 3/1/11 4:01 PM |
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RocPin
Life's Beachy <3
Member since 2/08 6765 total posts
Name:
Heather
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
Posted by Tilde
I always used to ask people this but now I try not to!
Me too! I never realized how annoying it was until I was preggo myself.
You live and you learn
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| Posted 3/1/11 4:08 PM |
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KrisT
Two Boys for Me!!
Member since 1/07 5213 total posts
Name:
Kristin
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
YES because my children will only be about 13 months apart! It aggravates me so much. People either flat out ask or make some kind of comment assuming that my second pregnancy was a "surprise"
Message edited 3/1/2011 4:11:24 PM.
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| Posted 3/1/11 4:10 PM |
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Ever-After
Goals w/o plans r just wishes
Member since 6/09 2585 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
that question really IS kinda rude. Even if you're wondering, what gives you the right to ASK? Will you be less happy for me if it WASN'T planned? I don't understand why it's necessary to know that.
When I first got pregnant 2 years ago, I ended up losing it in an early m/c and my boss actually asked me "Well, was the pregnancy planned?" I was very insulted by that because it made it seem like the m/c wouldn't be such a bad thing if it was a surprise pregnancy (which it wasn't - it was fully planned and would have hurt just as much if it wasn't).
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| Posted 3/1/11 4:22 PM |
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
ugh ! i hate this question, i get it all the time too.
people @ work even asked other people that im friendly with if it was planned...i find it really rude and hard to answer
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| Posted 3/1/11 4:25 PM |
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windest
LIF Adult
Member since 8/10 1064 total posts
Name:
Windy
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Re: anyone else constantly asked by people...
Yes I was asked that a lot too - especially since we are having a honeymoon baby - I think people like to imply that I was pregnant b4 the wedding.
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| Posted 3/1/11 4:43 PM |
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