Anyone's DH a smoker?

Are you having trouble with him smoking?

I'm aggravated for several reasons:

1) Of course, smoking overall is not good and ESP not good for MF.

2) He smokes in the car. Regardless of whether I ask him not to.... He agreed that he would "cut back" with the smoking - we already discussed that when I am pg. there will be ZERO smoking in the car or else I just refuse to ride..

3) We are spending $$$$$$$$$ for IVF yet he continues to spend on cigs.

I'm sorry for the vent...I just get so skeeved by cigarettes...and I know it's hard bc of the stress and to quit right now would be diff.

I think I'm going to see if he's open to the patch again....he's done it before and I'm kind of surpised he hasn't mentioned it.

Oh I just had to add this gem

I'm down south visiting my MIL and she made reservations for dinner tonight. She tells me "I made them in the smoking section for (DH)". Ok breathe Jen...So I said "I'd prefer not to sit in the smoking section given our situation right now with IVF (she is well aware). She said Oh well I guess but you do have to go on living your life - so I said Yes, and if that means avoiding unnecessary secondhand smoke that's what I'll do! I said he can make an effort and get up to go smoke outside JEEZ! So I told my DH and he said no problem we will sit in the non-smoking area ! W-T-F!

eta: I just overheard my MIL calling to change it to NON-smoking

Message edited 7/4/2008 6:25:49 PM.

Re: Anyone's DH a smoker?

Actually my Dh quit smoking about a month ago and I am so happy for him. He was usually pretty considerate and smoked outside or went to the other side of the house. Now if only my mother would quit. Two heartattacks, breast cancer and a touch of empysema just hasnt scared her enough!

Re: Anyone's DH a smoker?

Honestly, when we started seeing an RE the first thing the doctor said when he found out DH was a smoker was "you're done smoking. You've just had your last cigerette." He gave DH a whole thing about how it affects male fertility and how even secondhand smoke can affect female fertility. DH quit smoking the next day. When we got his semen analysis results they were within the low end of the normal range (except for morph-below ave) and the dr said that his results would improve after dh quit smoking for a certain amount of time.

Have you tried having your doctor speak to him?

Good luck!

Re: Anyone's DH a smoker?

I'm sure if you look at my posts on this board two years ago you will see a very similar post from me.

He couldn't quit and the IF process was making things worse for him because he was stressed about it and felt he had no other outlet.

I screamed and yelled because all I was asking of him was to give up ONE THING, compared to everything I was having to do physically.

He didn't quit.

He smoked when I was pregnant.

He smoked when he had a tumor removed from his neck.

He smoked when Logan was born.

And I bitched and cried and threatened and punished every single time.

Then one day he finally just stopped. All on his own.

The simple truth of it is (and everyone told me this all along) he won't stop until he wants to. Nothing you can say or do will change that.

Re: Anyone's DH a smoker?

HUGS..I would ask the doctor to speak to him and then refuse to ride in a car with him if he cannot respect your wishes. If he wants to continue smoking then make sure that you take care of herself and do not put herself in a dangerous situation - tell him point blank..you can kill yourself with those things but I will not allow my own health at risk for your addiction. And then stick by your word.
HUGS.

Re: Anyone's DH a smoker?

This haunts me everyday of my life.. I am so scared!! i wish there was something I can do but I do not think there is.. My DH is very active. he plays racquette EVERY SINGLE DAY??? He wakes up at 5am and sometimes plays at night too?? i do not know how this is happening? he is trying to lose weight too so I can see how he would be scared it will make him gain.. I try everything.. Thank God he will not smoke in front of me EVER!! he even lies and says he quits and when I say I smell it he says I am crazy.. This goes on every single day of our lives.. if I find the cig's I throw them out.. I pray over his body every night. I ask God to please give him the desire to quit because i cant make him. He is 49 yrs old and I cant believe he is still doing this?? I leave notes all over pleading with him to please stop. Infertility is in my life as well. My RE has told him to stop but he just cant!!! I know this was your rant but I couldnt help myself

Message edited 7/5/2008 9:43:23 AM.