Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

My daughter is 4.5 months old and is on breastmilk. I went back to work about 6 weeks ago and she has been getting bottles of pumped milk all day and has been nursing at night. Lately she has not been wanting to nurse, she ends up cooing and talking everytime I try to nurse her in the middle of the night. Then she starts to get frustrated and I have to give her a bottle. I don't mind so much- it only means I have to pump more... I am just sad becasue i really miss that special time we have when she nurses at night.

I know my milk flow is good and my supply is good becasue I pump 5-6 times everyday and am producing about 22 ounces not including what I used to give her through nursing.

Does anyone have any suggestions how I can get her to latch on again? I really want to keep our night time nursing instead of giving her bm through the bottle only. Is there anything I can do to re-establish her latching on?

I am so frustrated and sort of sad.

Any suggestions would be really appreciated.

Thanks!!!

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

No advice. But I would keep at it, cause I think they go thru stages. She may just be enjoying your company. Good luck! Hopefully someon on here can help

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Hmm, well I had problems with her latching on at the beginning, and when it happened I just kept trying- one thing that worked for me was to relax and take deep breaths when she doesn't seem to want to stay on the nipple, it worked to keep her on a little longer.

On weekends do you still pump or do you breastfeed the whole time? I would say try this weekend to breastfeed, don't offer the bottle. I know I hear that the bottles give them a faster flow so maybe she's frustrated, but I think if she doesn't have a choice she'll go for it. Also does she suck her thumb or have a pacifier? If she does then maybe she just doesn't have as much of a need to suck as a baby that doesn't do those things?

Good luck, I remember how hard it was to pump and then feed your baby, wash the equipment, then start all over again. And I know exactly how you feel about missing the breastfeeding, as a working mom, that time breastfeeding her in the night and morning was the most precious time of the day for me, and looking forward to it got me through the day at work! I hope it works out!

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

My DC is almost 16 wks and in daycare. We've been dealing with the adjustment also. From what I've been reading, it's very common for 4 month old BF babies to become distracted.

distractable 4 month olds

I don't have an immediate answer for you, but I do have some questions.

What type of bottles/nipples are you using? Are they slow flow?

How much BM is your DC getting at DC? And how long is s/he there?

How often do you nurse while you are at home during the week? during the weekend?

Message edited 8/23/2007 9:28:29 AM.

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

My mother in law is sitting for us - lol- lucky me...- I leave the house at 6:30 am and come home around 5:30pm/6 she gets bottles all day- then I usually give her a bath around 8 and nurse her at 8:30/9 and its off to dreamland. Sometimes she wakes at 1/2am for a snack and really wakes up around 4/5am for a full feeding. I usually just nurse her in bed and then we all fall back asleep till the alarm goes off, when I get up an she continues to sleep.

I have been using Avent bottles, with 1 and 2 nipples even though she is 4 months old I didnt move up to the #3 bottles since I was afraid the flow would be too fast to compete with my natural flow.

My MIL gives her 3- 4 4 ounce bottles during the day. I have been sort of lax about it- letting her feed her when she is hungry. Do you think I should make her stick to a schedule?

So i usually only nurse 2 times a day- on both the weekends and weekdays- should I try nursing only on the weekends?

My problem is she really only likes to nurse in the laying down position. If you have any other suggestions on nursing holds that she might like I am all for trying.

Thanks for the article on distraction- It really describes her... here is a photo of my dd at 3 months

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

For a BFing infant, you should only being using slow flow newborn type nipples. That might be part of the problem. She's getting the milk so fast from the bottle, that she's getting frustrated when it comes time to nurse.

Here is an article on bottle feeding a BF infant: link

You should also check out this article on the amounts a BF baby eats per day. The average is 25 oz- the range is 19-30 oz. My baby seems to fall in the 30 oz range. For the 9 hrs he's there, I have them feeding him about 11 oz. However, he also isn't STTN (sleeping through the night) and that will impact how much they eat during the day. link to amount of EBM (I think you're probably falling within that range. But it's interesting information to have.)

I'm not sure how you're letdown is, but she may also be frustrated that the milk doesn't start flowing as quickly as it does from the bottle. You could try pumping a little bit to get it going before you attempt to latch her on. That may help a little bit. I would also BF whenever you're with her and try to refrain from using the bottle.

As far as positions, I usually nurse in the craddle hold. In the beginning when I was having latch problems, we used the football hold. I found that I could controle the latch more and see more what I was doing. I just recently mastered nursing lying down. (BTW- Do you mean she likes it when you are lying down while nursing or that only she is lying down?)

If you haven't found your way to the kellymom website, you should definitely check them out. It was suggested to me by some of the BFing moms on here and I have found it to be an extremely valuable resource, especially now that I am returning to work and dealing with daycare. They have articles on just about everything you could image that relates to BFing.

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

THank you so much for all your help!!! I'm going to change all her nipples to #1 when i get home today.

THank you for sending that site- it is really helpful- I am printing out the bottle feeding tips so I can talk to my mother in law about them tonight.

She likes nursing in when we are both lying down- i find she gets frustrated easily in the football hold but I will try the other holds- In the beginning i had problems wiht her latching on and she did it great int eh lying down position so I never used any other position once i found one that worked.

I'm going to check all the nipples and try nursing more tonight. I told my MIL not to feed her after 5 today so I can get her nice and hungry.

I'll let you know how it goes. Thank you so much for all the great tips!

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

First of all, you are doing great!

I went back to work full time in January and continued to nurse my baby until June. I would nurse him in the morning (while he was bascially still sleeping - a dream feed) and at night when I can home from work 1 - 2 times, depending on when I got home. Yes, I think you should ask your MIL to not give DD that last bottle. Let her be a little hungry. She wont starve!

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

thanks!

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

I just have to add that I just switched to Adiri bottles and they really mimic the pace of BFing more than the Avent ones I was using, even with the nipple #1. Changing bottle might be a last resort, but I love these new ones.

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

I nursed/pumped for 5 months and also used Advent bottles. DS actually had a fit and refused to eat when I tried to up the nipple size. He's 10 months now and will drink from a 2-3. It took until the past month or so for him to take the size 3. I would suggest bringing her back down to a size 1 so she has to work a little harder with the bottle. I would also say that at 4 months, you can get her on a regular eating schedule. She should be able to go about 4 hours between feedings. Now DS is now almost 10 months, but if DS wakes up earlier than usual, I don't feed him until his regular feeding time, or maybe a half hour early.

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

DS went through this stage for a short time. I just started to lie down to nurse. Now we kept that nursing position for the first thing in the AM feeding. It's become a morning bonding thing now. He's sleeping 10-11 hours a night now so the middle night feeds no longer exist...

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Everyone, thank you for all the feedback.
Last night I gave my MIL print outs from KellyMom on bottle feeding tips, she didn't look amused at my new set of rules but breastfeeding is important to me and I tried to tell her in the nicest way possible. I know she is just selfish and wants my DD to be bottlefed mostly so she can do it more.
I proceeded to change all her nipples to #1 and tried to nurse her last night. SHe had her last bottle at 330pm but refused to nurse in the cradle hold or any position, whne i was lying down on my right side she kept trying to turn over the other way, or screaming bloody murder, so eventually i gave it a rest and fed her a bottle at 8:30 and hte other half at 10:30 after trying to nurse again to no avail.
But she slept until 530am when my hubby gave her a kiss in the morning and woke her... so I tried to nurse her again in her happy morning state and after some fumbling and figuring out a funky a position where she finally latched on, SUCCESS!!! I didnt even care that i was laying all twisted on the bed and she was happy and contentlaying on her back, wiht her head tilted to her right, drinking away. I was laying on my left and needless to say she didn't want the left breast, she wanted the right one- (but I wasn't going to complain) so i laid all twisted and enjoyed our bonding time.

I'm going to go and get those other bottles today...

Thank you so much for all the great feedback. I'll let you know how the weekend turns out!

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

My MIL was giving me a mouthful the other day that we shoudl up the ounces she is feeding her, etc becasue she is 4.5 months now, blah blah blah- I printed out that feeding info from kellymom that says increasing the ounces is not necessary.

I think it is on this thread in Thia's response.

grrr.. .MILs!

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Is there a place on long island that carries the adiri bottles? or did you just order them online?

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Posted by artjunkie

My MIL was giving me a mouthful the other day that we shoudl up the ounces she is feeding her, etc becasue she is 4.5 months now, blah blah blah- I printed out that feeding info from kellymom that says increasing the ounces is not necessary.

I think it is on this thread in Thia's response.

grrr.. .MILs!

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

I found a place on 9th ave and 48th street that has the adiri bottles- I'm going to walk over there today during lunch- it's 5 avenues away but worth it.

When DD went to daycare they said the same thing to me about sending her more bottles. thing is they don't keep the 5 hour rule where it's good for up to 5 hours onces they start a bottle if it doesn't get used in that sitting they toss it and start over. I was so upset since i feel like it's gold to me I hate waste.

Your DS is gaining really well. That is amazing! you are doing great!

My dd was born at 8, lb 4 oz and lef thte hospital at 7, 13 at her 4 month check up she was 12 lb 10 oz
i was concerned but the doc said she is consistant in her percentile at each visit so he is very happy with her weight gain. I dont want to obsess over it.
Although I think she has gained alot in the last 2 weeks- maybe a growth spurt, since she feels so much heavier to me. We'll see at the next check up on the 8th.

Yeah, MIL care is cheaper then daycare but it's tough to tell her what to do, since she thinks she knows better. atleast at daycare or a nanny they have to listen- it's their job to keep their opions to themselves.

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

15, 10!!! omg! I can't wait to give him a good squeeze!

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help

Hold your ground with Daycare... you are doing great!

I just sent my brother in law to get the bottles of rme on the west side since i couldn't leave my desk for lunch.
He called me - they only charge $10 a bottle for hte new ones- that is cheaper then anyplace i saw on the web. the palce is called RealBirth and it's a pretty cool place according to their site- they offer lots of classes and seminars, etc. I might chekc out the working moms seminar one day.

I got some size 0 -3 months and some 3- 6 months to try them out. I will keep you updated. And I iwll let you know if they heat up etc.

Re: Brestfeeding working mom- needs help