BTDT BFing moms.....

What's some adivce you can give us new moms to be who plan on BFing....

What are some things they didnt tell you before you BFed...

TIA

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

Be open to options. If you have a plan, know that plans change. My plan was to only feed from the breast for the first 6 weeks, no bottles. I didn't even clean any bottles. Well, DS came home from the hospital before I did. Plans changed.

Before buying a pump, rent one for a month. Some girls have problems pumping, so you don't want to waste the money for a new pump if you won't do it past one month.

IT HURTS!!! I was told it hurt, but nothing prepared me for wanting to scream when DS latched. I wanted to rip my nipples off. I wanted to give up. By week 3 I didn't remember the pain. Get some Lansinoh (breast creme) and make sure you have it in the hospital. (Some hospitals give you samples.)

Everybody is different. Always seek help. Always ask questions. Your dr may not be right 100% of the time. Another nursing mother isn't right 100% of the time. A lactation consultant isn't right 100% of the time. You need to do what works for you. Taking direction from everybody helps.

If you are serious about BF, let your DH know your intentions before giving birth. If my DH wasn't supportive, I may have given up. I BF for one year.

Good luck!

Message edited 5/25/2009 4:07:34 PM.

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

They say being a parent is the hardest job you'll ever love. If you wind up lovng BFing, you'll find it's the hardest thing to do in the beginning. Nobody ever told me that. I think nobody ever says it because if they did women wouldn't BF. It requires a commitment and determination. If you go into saying "eh, if it doesn't work I can use formula" chances are you won't be successful. You need to be 100% committed. If you go into it expecting to be successful chances are you'll stick with it - even though you will want to quit 100 times.

All the other things Kelly said are right on target.

DD will be 18 months next week and we're still BFing.

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

Here is my "standard" reply to new BFing moms:

First, I'd like to give you some ...and inspriation:

DS is 11 months old and we are still going strong!

I'm no professional but here are my suggestions:

The more you supplement with formula, the less time DC spends latched, = less milk production. By supplementing and DC not at the breast your body is thinking DC is eating less. So you are actually decreasing your supply.

Try to remove all suckling items from DC's day except the breast. Don't give pacis, bottles, etc. The aforementioned require a different latch than the breast and could be confusing DC. I know this sounds impossible at 2:51am, but for the next few days really focus on BFing alone. Don't worry about laundry, cooking, cleaning, etc...it will all still be there once you have a BFing champ! Nap when DC naps so you have that extra umph at 5:59am.

Your nipples may be sore because DC isn't latching properly. Make sure majority of the bottom part of your nipple is in DC mouth. DS latched like a champ from the beginning, then around 3 weeks my nipples were so sore they felt like they were burning. I discussed it with my sister (who is now EBFing her 3rd) and she said "check your latch". Sure enough I had gotten too confident and he wasn't latching properly.

Also, try to nurse "ahead" of the feeding. For the first 2 weeks (especially because DS was jaundice) I would set an alarm. Every hour and a half I would wake him up and put him on the breast (even at night). If you get to it before hunger strikes they are more patient and willing to work on their latch. Versus being ravenous pigs

Maybe change how you are holding DC at the breast. For the first month I could only BF Ryan in the football hold. My breasts are/were large (38DD). I felt like the cradle hold suffocated Ryan and I wasn't quite coordinated enough to move my breast away from his tiny nose while holding him at the same time.

Pumping.....only pump (before 6 weeks) if you want to increase your supply. And make it a habit/schedule (most pumpers get the most in the morning since babies usually go their longest stretch between feedings at night). I have never been a successful pumper and to this day, only keep a few days worth of bottles in the freezer gosh forbid there is an emergency.

To also increase your supply make sure you are drinking at least one 8oz glass of water at each nursing session. (Don't forget to drink water in between as well). Add oatmeal to your diet. And there are a few good health food stores (Trader Joes, Whole Foods, etc) that carry a tea called "Mother's Milk". I never actually used it, but have heard great things.

Lastly, don't get discouraged. I know easier said than done but we have all been there. Especially in the beginning. They cluster feed, and cry, and you begin to feel like a cow. Anytime you get frustrated, drop me an FM...I'll boost your confidence You'd be surprised at what a "I think you are doing an amazing job" can do!

Oh, and one final note. Don't EVER feel like a failure. Ultimately only YOU, the MOTHER, know what is best for your DC. Go with your gut and stick with it! If your gut is telling you to stick with it, I say go for it!

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

I agree with the others posts. I went into it hoping for the best but if it didn't work out I wouldn't beat myself up over it. In the end it was exactly what everyone says.....takes a lot of commitment! It was not easy in the beginning, especially the sleepless nights! I remember saying to my husband, why is she crying, she can't possibly be hungry I just fed her...WRONG, she was hungry the milk was not in enough yet. But over time it got easier. I finally weaned at 14 months, cause it was time for me to stop and enjoy being "myself" before we try for #2.

If you want to be able to also give a bottle, don't stop occassionally giving one! My DD took the bottle at 6 weeks with no problem, but because of my DH work schedule and being a SAHM, I didn't give her a bottle often enough and eventually she won't take it much at all.

I found the nursing tanks worked well in the beginning and then I got some more bras once I knew if was going well. Stock up on nursing pads, lasionin (sp?), before you go to the hospital freeze some NB diapers with 1/2 C water---so soothing!)

my DH was very supportive, got up at night, kept me company when I fed (even when we were out)...I am not sure I could have done it without him too.

Good luck!

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

few things i tell soon to be mommies...

breast feeding is the HARDEST THING IN THE WORLD. lol...kidding but somewhat serious. no one ever told me it was hard...i mean they did mention it but i was like how hard can it be? believe me, it's a learning process. it hurts...newborns nurse all.day.long. no joke. it's normal. it gets better, but not for a few weeks. if you have any questions whatsoever, reach out to your lactation consultant, they are the best resource you can utilize. if i think of anything else, i'll let you know.

eta- don't be a hero. if it doesn't work out for you, accept it and be open to formula. i was 100% against formula and when i had to suppliment during her first week due to jaundice i was literally distraught. i cried for days..the pp hormones didn't help either. if i was more open to other options, i would have enjoyed those first few days alot more instead of calling myself a failure and beating myself up for nothing!

Message edited 5/25/2009 10:15:38 PM.

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

No one told me it would be so hard in the beginning!!! BFing is def. a labor of love. You have to really want to do it, to be able to go through all the hurdles.
For me the first 8 weeks were the worst, it got a little better after. It got a lot better after 10 weeks. That's right 10 freaking weeks it took me to FINALLY get it going without issues!
What I can say is, after you've gotten past the difficult part, it is an amazing experience! You may want to quit a million times but if you hang in there, you'll be glad you did! Wish you lots of luck!

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

I agree with the other ladies. It is hard and the beginning can be brutal. DD was jaundiced and she didn't want to latch at first and I was horribly depressed about it and cried about giving her formula. I even shuddered at having DH take pics of me feeding her a bottle. Eventually it worked out and at 27 months, I still nurse at night.

Just remember to keep an open mind and don't freak if it doesn't work out perfectly in the beginning.

And contrary to what everyone says, you can supplement and still successfully BF. You just need to remember to either nurse or pump often.

The beginning is tough, but the experience is amazing once it clicks. I am so glad I stuck with it!

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

It is emotionally and physically straining, but it does become so worth it! I wanted to quit every day until I hit about 1 month, when all of a sudden, I decided I loved it! Now, I am devastated to go back to work, partially bc I am afraid my supply will go down, and I want to nurse her for as long as I can. Just keep going through all of the pain-- it will not hurt forever, and the benefits totally outweigh your discomfort. Good luck!

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

One major thing is that everyone's experience is a little different. The one thing that I didn't expect was how easy it could be (for me and my baby)! Obviously all the women on here are responding because they finally got it so they finally did enjoy it but I really loved it from the beginning. Both my babies latched on right away and made the entire experience very easy for me. BF is not supposed to hurt, as long as the latch is right. Don't get me wrong, clogged ducts and engorgement hurt like h@ll, but the latch is what is not supposed to hurt!
Definitely take a BF class before so you know what to do and what to avoid and have your DH or SO come with you. You will need support, especially at 3:00 AM when it would be so much easier to have your SO just give the baby a bottle because you have, what it feels like, been nursing the baby for 23 days straight . Also, never forget that you aren't alone. Most likely, whatever you are going through, at one time or another, we have all been there

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

I had a good experience from the beginning.

I sufferred from PPD/Anxiety and that was the only thing I felt like I was successful with. BFing was what kept me going. That was the only thing I felt like I was doing right.

One thing I think BFing moms should know, is if they do experience PPD and need to take medication, you can still continue to BF.

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

Wow. Thanks so much for this thread. I am a mom for 1 week and breastfeeding has been H E L L! I have cried so much and felt like a failure, needing to pump, even supplement with formula on occassion. I am seeing a lactation consultant, talking to people, and continuing to try, but it has been very very very hard.

It is wise that you asked this question b/c I really wish I knew more about breastfeeding before I started. I heard that it would be hard, but i just had no idea about the pain and the emotional commitment I needed to have.

One thing I would like to add is that many people will have many conflicting opinions on what to do and how to breastfeed. It is good to be aware of that so that your head doesn't explode as mine has and you can choose what is best for you.

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

A number of the previous posters have offered good advice. I just want to say that BF is easier for some than others from the start but this means nothing in the end. I remember being SO discouraged by women who made it seem so easy and that it should never hurt unless you are doing something wrong and that it was so natural right from the beginning. This is NOT the case for everyone. So if it is awful for you for whatever reason BUT you want to stick with it - don't give up. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. I had the roughest time in the beginning (I'm sure you can find posts from my first few weeks pp) but ended up BF DS for 10 months - it took about 6-8 wks for all of my "issues" to resolve but, once they did, they were completely over and BF was like second nature.

I also want to say since not everyone's experience is the same don't let what other people say get to you. I know first hand that even if DC DOES latch correctly there can still be pain and nipple issues. Everyone's body is different. Also, alot of these Lactation Consultants can be like nazis so be wary of them too.

I guess my main point is you have to do what works for you. Do what YOU need to do to keep you and DC happy and healthy and what you need to do to continue BF if it is what you want dont be afraid to pump, give bottles or even formula if it helps you get through a rough patch - it doesn't mean you won't eventually be successful EBF

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

Re: BTDT BFing moms.....

The best advice I think I can give is to not listen to everything you hear/read. Everything I read said that newborn babies should be eating about every 2 hours....my DD ate every 3-4 hrs her first few weeks of life. I was petrified that she wasn't getting enough and she wouldn't gain weight properly. I never woke her to fed her like the books say to do. My mom (who BF'd 3 kids) said that she would wake if she was hungry and the fact that she was sleeping meant that she was content - and I truly believe that. My DD gained 2.5lbs her first month of life - so then I knew that I had doe the right thing and only fed her when she asked. And now that DD is 10wks old, we are going strong. She is a great sleeper (9hrs at night!) and I never wake her to feed her.

Best of Luck to you on your Bfing journey - it's really tough at first, but stick it out, it's soooo worth it!