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bicosi
life is a carousel
Member since 7/07 14956 total posts
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M
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by NervousNell
Could you imagine what the case load would be like if everyone was picking up the phone reporting a parent yelling at their kid in Dunkin Donuts, the mall, Target?
It would be out of control and the kids who really DO need help, wouldn't get it.
I can't imagine calling them up and saying- "Um, yes, I just witnessed a dad who was REALLY mean to his poor son! He yelled at him in Target! I got his plate number- can you check him out?"
I agree. CPS is understaffed and overworked AS IT IS!!
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Posted 8/5/11 4:49 PM  |
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kerrycec03
Mom of 2 beautiful boys!!
Member since 6/06 13519 total posts
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Kerry
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by NervousNell
Could you imagine what the case load would be like if everyone was picking up the phone reporting a parent yelling at their kid in Dunkin Donuts, the mall, Target?
It would be out of control and the kids who really DO need help, wouldn't get it.
I can't imagine calling them up and saying- "Um, yes, I just witnessed a dad who was REALLY mean to his poor son! He yelled at him in Target! I got his plate number- can you check him out?"
EXACTLY!!! I also find it hard to believe that somebody 15 feet away would see a kid bleeding from their mouth....I know DS will bang his arm in the shopping cart at target and scream "I has a BOO BOO"....is somebody going to report me?? JMO
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| Posted 8/5/11 4:50 PM |
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JennZ
MY LIFE!!
Member since 8/05 25463 total posts
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by JennZ
I really think some of you are out of control. Honestly, thinking of calling cps on random people not knowing them from a freaking hole in the wall. I think we all are way to high on our "Im a great parent" soapboxes. Seriously do any of you just not have a crappy day every once in a while? I think I read posts on here daily where I  And think really? Whether it be, what do I do for a temp, what do I do if he sneezes to much, or who do I call for a hangnail. I think everyone thinks they are the perfect parent and cant see that sometimes you arent. Gasp.
I think there needs to a bit LESS judging and a bit more minding their business. Its really out of control.
**just MY opinion of course
yeah we should all turn a blind eye and then turn the page when we read about abused/murdered children.
Smack a child to point they bleed, go on I'm sure its the child's fault that you are having a bad day
And leave it to YOU to take it there. Im not saying beat the sh!t out of your kid, but if some random no one gets a glimpse of me and my ( since this seems to be the preferred word around here ) " spirited" child have a meltdown, and i have had meltdowns all day, and smack his asss i have to worry about some random chick calling cps on me. Really??
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| Posted 8/5/11 4:50 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
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:)
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by MrsMeloyellow
IMO smacking in the face is the worst! it's so disrespectful and i feel when you do that you are teaching your child that its ok to smack people in their face, it's ok to handle things with physical violence as a solution. but thats just my opinion...maybe me being beaten as a child has something to do with my POV
I disagree. I learned that my mother was seriously pizzed. I didnt learn to do that to others. I learned that I crossed the line that day and to listen better next time.
I was hit as a c hild here and there, not beaten. But that doesnt mean I plan to do that to my DD. I dont think it makes you who you are as a parent. Not at all. But I def dont think every time any parent hits its wrong or uncalled for.
Message edited 8/5/2011 5:05:57 PM.
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| Posted 8/5/11 5:05 PM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
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I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
My first thought was"wow, way to mind everyone else's business.". I don't even want to know what others think about me if I'm rushing my dd into the car. I know bad things happen to kids, and it sucks. I would never lay a hand on my child, nor would dh. I just think we need to do what's best for our own children.
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| Posted 8/5/11 5:14 PM |
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Aries14
Can't plan life...
Member since 8/08 2860 total posts
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
I agree that you cant judge a situation and/or parent by a few minutes of watching them in a parking lot, store, etc. BUT my heart does break thinking about all those kids that continue to be hurt/abused bc we all "minded our own business".  How many times do we read about these things in the papers when its too late and we all cry "why didnt someone say something!". it is a very tough call.
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| Posted 8/5/11 6:50 PM |
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Jen I so agree with you! Look we all have bad days I get it but you don't know what the back story is. We can all sit here and oh I would this and I would that but in a lot of these posts the OP does NOTHING except mouth a dirty word to the partent. IF I saw what I thought was a case of TRUE child abuse or neglect I would say something or call the cops right away. I have no respect for people bashing somebody or accusing them of possible child abuse and doing NOTHING. I WAS in this situation last summer. I saw a little girl get hit and then forcefully placed int a van by an older gentelman. I called 911 and as I beeped and hinked for him to pull over I let dispatch know where they were. MANY people saw this and went on their day. This was a grandfather and his grand-daughter had some violent mood disorder. Washe pisssed about the police YUP he was, do I give a shitt NOPE. The little girls mother called me later and thanked me for reporting what I saw because it COULD have been something. The point is......if you REALLY feel THAT strongly about something DO SOMETHING!
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| Posted 8/5/11 7:18 PM |
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
I will add that I was abused as a child and CPS was called one time. Nothing came of it. House was clean I was clean (my mom also had OCD ) and there was food in the fridge. Hate to be a debbie downer, ht even calling CPS does very little.
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| Posted 8/5/11 7:29 PM |
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katiebug
I'll love you for always
Member since 2/08 4624 total posts
Name:
Katie
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Message edited 7/17/2012 3:06:19 AM.
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| Posted 8/5/11 7:56 PM |
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browneyedgirl
family is all that matters
Member since 6/06 6513 total posts
Name:
browneyes
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by JennZ
I really think some of you are out of control. Honestly, thinking of calling cps on random people not knowing them from a freaking hole in the wall. I think we all are way to high on our "Im a great parent" soapboxes. Seriously do any of you just not have a crappy day every once in a while? I think I read posts on here daily where I And think really? Whether it be, what do I do for a temp, what do I do if he sneezes to much, or who do I call for a hangnail. I think everyone thinks they are the perfect parent and cant see that sometimes you arent. Gasp.
I think there needs to a bit LESS judging and a bit more minding their business. Its really out of control.
**just MY opinion of course
hands down, the best post i've read on here in months
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| Posted 8/5/11 8:20 PM |
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thisisme
LIF Adolescent
Member since 3/06 560 total posts
Name:
ME
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by JennZ
I really think some of you are out of control. Honestly, thinking of calling cps on random people not knowing them from a freaking hole in the wall. I think we all are way to high on our "Im a great parent" soapboxes. Seriously do any of you just not have a crappy day every once in a while? I think I read posts on here daily where I And think really? Whether it be, what do I do for a temp, what do I do if he sneezes to much, or who do I call for a hangnail. I think everyone thinks they are the perfect parent and cant see that sometimes you arent. Gasp.
I think there needs to a bit LESS judging and a bit more minding their business. Its really out of control.
**just MY opinion of course
Blatant physical abuse aside, I completely and whole-heartedly agree with you!
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| Posted 8/5/11 8:25 PM |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by JennZ
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by JennZ
I really think some of you are out of control. Honestly, thinking of calling cps on random people not knowing them from a freaking hole in the wall. I think we all are way to high on our "Im a great parent" soapboxes. Seriously do any of you just not have a crappy day every once in a while? I think I read posts on here daily where I And think really? Whether it be, what do I do for a temp, what do I do if he sneezes to much, or who do I call for a hangnail. I think everyone thinks they are the perfect parent and cant see that sometimes you arent. Gasp.
I think there needs to a bit LESS judging and a bit more minding their business. Its really out of control.
**just MY opinion of course
yeah we should all turn a blind eye and then turn the page when we read about abused/murdered children.
Smack a child to point they bleed, go on I'm sure its the child's fault that you are having a bad day
And leave it to YOU to take it there. Im not saying beat the sh!t out of your kid, but if some random no one gets a glimpse of me and my ( since this seems to be the preferred word around here ) " spirited" child have a meltdown, and i have had meltdowns all day, and smack his asss i have to worry about some random chick calling cps on me. Really??
You are comparing here things that might not be comparable. The one thread was about smacking a child so hard they bled. Yes, If I saw you smack your child's a$$ that hard, you better believe I would be calling SOMEONE...and I am a big mouth parent...meaning I yell at my kids, discipline them in public etc, and I expect people to mind their business, but if I smacked my child anywhere on his body hard enough to bleed, I would expect someone would say or do something.
You and others are generalizing and not sticking to this SPECIFIC incident.
I get it though, these threads are getting more and more common and really we aren't perfect parents...there is no such thing...But maybe lets all take the threads on a case by case example and not generalize and get into what if's. It just get's everyone all riled up needlessly. The CPS stuff should not be tossed around lightly ...EVER.
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| Posted 8/5/11 8:34 PM |
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monkeybride
My Everything
Member since 5/05 20541 total posts
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by JennZ
I really think some of you are out of control. Honestly, thinking of calling cps on random people not knowing them from a freaking hole in the wall. I think we all are way to high on our "Im a great parent" soapboxes. Seriously do any of you just not have a crappy day every once in a while? I think I read posts on here daily where I And think really? Whether it be, what do I do for a temp, what do I do if he sneezes to much, or who do I call for a hangnail. I think everyone thinks they are the perfect parent and cant see that sometimes you arent. Gasp.
I think there needs to a bit LESS judging and a bit more minding their business. Its really out of control.
**just MY opinion of course
yeah we should all turn a blind eye and then turn the page when we read about abused/murdered children.
Smack a child to point they bleed, go on I'm sure its the child's fault that you are having a bad day
Most of my bad days are from my children. There I said it. Being home with the two of them 24/7 wears on my last effing nerve.
I love them dearly but they try every last ounce of patience I have and I count the minutes until school starts again.
So yes if someone asks why I'm having a bad day a lot of times at this point in my life I'll likely say it's b/c of my kids.
Do I plan to smack my kid until they bleed? No. But honestly as women and mother who are generally pushed to our max with all we have thrown at us we should offer support not judgement. Maybe ask if there is anything you can do to help.
Here's an example. My friend's son who is 6 was having a ridiculous screaming temper tantrum. My friend was doing all she could not to lose her Sh!T and trying to hold it together so we could all go into our DD's little dance show. This kind grandmother comes up and instead of judging or telling my friend what to do engages her screaming lunatic (at the time) of a child. Asks if he wants to meet her grandson and play for a bit. That is kindness and what the world needs more of. Not the constant holier than though.
Being a parent, especially a mom b/c a lot of the burden falls on us, is the hardest effing job ever and if you are so great as to never lose your SH!T then more power to you. Go sign up to be a saint b/c most of us aren't.
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| Posted 8/5/11 8:37 PM |
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dm24angel
Happiness
Member since 5/05 34581 total posts
Name:
Donna
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by monkeybride
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by JennZ
I really think some of you are out of control. Honestly, thinking of calling cps on random people not knowing them from a freaking hole in the wall. I think we all are way to high on our "Im a great parent" soapboxes. Seriously do any of you just not have a crappy day every once in a while? I think I read posts on here daily where I And think really? Whether it be, what do I do for a temp, what do I do if he sneezes to much, or who do I call for a hangnail. I think everyone thinks they are the perfect parent and cant see that sometimes you arent. Gasp.
I think there needs to a bit LESS judging and a bit more minding their business. Its really out of control.
**just MY opinion of course
yeah we should all turn a blind eye and then turn the page when we read about abused/murdered children.
Smack a child to point they bleed, go on I'm sure its the child's fault that you are having a bad day
Most of my bad days are from my children. There I said it. Being home with the two of them 24/7 wears on my last effing nerve.
I love them dearly but they try every last ounce of patience I have and I count the minutes until school starts again.
So yes if someone asks why I'm having a bad day a lot of times at this point in my life I'll likely say it's b/c of my kids.
Do I plan to smack my kid until they bleed? No. But honestly as women and mother who are generally pushed to our max with all we have thrown at us we should offer support not judgement. Maybe ask if there is anything you can do to help.
Here's an example. My friend's son who is 6 was having a ridiculous screaming temper tantrum. My friend was doing all she could not to lose her Sh!T and trying to hold it together so we could all go into our DD's little dance show. This kind grandmother comes up and instead of judging or telling my friend what to do engages her screaming lunatic (at the time) of a child. Asks if he wants to meet her grandson and play for a bit. That is kindness and what the world needs more of. Not the constant holier than though.
Being a parent, especially a mom b/c a lot of the burden falls on us, is the hardest effing job ever and if you are so great as to never lose your SH!T then more power to you. Go sign up to be a saint b/c most of us aren't.
Very well said !!
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| Posted 8/5/11 8:39 PM |
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jgl
Love my little boys!!!
Member since 8/07 7060 total posts
Name:
g
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Im so confused.
I feel like it is being said that it isnt a big deal that this woman smacked her kid across the face and he bled.
Im pretty sure no matter how frustrated you are (and yes our kids push us to the edge) it is NOT okay to do that.
Im not saying in this instance (I was not there) but we need to use our judgement. If I think a child is in harm, I will will call because to me I think it is worth the risk to make sure that kid is ok. I have to do this as a teacher.
I once called the cops on a woman who was clearly drunk and got in the car with her DD to drive home. I followed them and called the police.
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| Posted 8/5/11 9:23 PM |
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MrsRitaB
Love of my life! <3
Member since 4/10 4669 total posts
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Ri
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Perfectly said monkeybride
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| Posted 8/5/11 9:26 PM |
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MaZz
* Lovin my baby girl!!! *
Member since 2/09 6243 total posts
Name:
Gina
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by Goobster
I agree with you. I think many people don't discipline their children enough (not necessarily a physical sense of discipline) and when they see a parent disciplining (or reprimanding) differently, they right away think it's awful and cruel. I am all for protecting children but come on...children had much more respect back in the
day when there wasn't all this pressure to be perfect on a parent who never talked nasty, never raised a finger or never raised their voice.
I see too many situations where it "appears" the children rule the roost and that is only a disservice to them IMO. Teaches them to be spoiled brats who can't handle the word NO. I am not saying children should tolerate abuse but I don't think abuse is as broad as some people make it out to be.
1000 thumbs up for this comment!!! It's amazing how some kids have no manners and are downright bratty simply bc the parents are afraid of disciplining. It totally is a disservice to their generation.
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| Posted 8/5/11 9:37 PM |
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wingsofsong
My 3 little loves <3<3<3
Member since 1/09 7395 total posts
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Maureen
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by IansMommy23
imo its impossible to call yourself a good parent if you're smacking your kid in the face and making them bleed. NO parent should touch their child like that.
we were obviously all raised differently and have different views. you can think someones a good parent by beating their child and i can think that's horrible and trashy. my parents never laid one finger on me growing up and i would NEVER hit my son.
ITA 1000%!!! I hear where the OP is coming from as far as people getting all bent out of shape because they caught some parent in a parking lot saying something snippy to their child. It happens, every parent gets their buttons pushed, has a rough day, and loses their cool with their child(ren) at some point or another. We're all human and we all have those moments. And because we are all human, it is our nature to judge. We all do that too. But in those such instances, I see no issue with the silent judging in your head, and moving on. However, there is never EVER an excuse in this world that could justify hitting a child in the face and making him bleed. NEVER. That is hands down, absolutely 100% inexcusable. Whether it be an isolated incident or not. And I would hope to God that we all have the decency as humans to be able to stand up for those who don't have a voice. I think in a situation such as that, anyone who witnessed it would be totally within their rights to call the cops or CPS.
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| Posted 8/5/11 9:38 PM |
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julz33
i run for bacon
Member since 5/05 20584 total posts
Name:
julz
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by wingsofsong
Posted by IansMommy23
imo its impossible to call yourself a good parent if you're smacking your kid in the face and making them bleed. NO parent should touch their child like that.
we were obviously all raised differently and have different views. you can think someones a good parent by beating their child and i can think that's horrible and trashy. my parents never laid one finger on me growing up and i would NEVER hit my son.
ITA 1000%!!! I hear where the OP is coming from as far as people getting all bent out of shape because they caught some parent in a parking lot saying something snippy to their child. It happens, every parent gets their buttons pushed, has a rough day, and loses their cool with their child(ren) at some point or another. We're all human and we all have those moments. And because we are all human, it is our nature to judge. We all do that too. But in those such instances, I see no issue with the silent judging in your head, and moving on. However, there is never EVER an excuse in this world that could justify hitting a child in the face and making him bleed. NEVER. That is hands down, absolutely 100% inexcusable. Whether it be an isolated incident or not. And I would hope to God that we all have the decency as humans to be able to stand up for those who don't have a voice. I think in a situation such as that, anyone who witnessed it would be totally within their rights to call the cops or CPS.
ITA!!
And wanted to add, if someone is hitting their child that hard in public, imagine what goes on at home.
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| Posted 8/5/11 9:40 PM |
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maybemommy10
Big Brothers to Be !
Member since 2/10 3868 total posts
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
and this is why i plan to beat my children in private
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| Posted 8/5/11 9:51 PM |
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Nifheim
allo
Member since 1/09 5476 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
my father threw me up against the wall and choked me for a split second because I threw a piece of spaghetti at him. He never laid a hand on me, never hit me once but he lost it that one instance because i was a royal pain in the butt. My mother lost it a few times in public and hit me several times because i was acting out. I would never say that was abuse. That is just how I was raised. I am becoming less judgmental as time goes on, if i see someone smack a kid i do think damn but then I again i don't know what the kid was saying or doing before hand. When i do get concerned is when a child is being repetitively beaten that is the flag for me.
Also people's attitudes. Sometimes parents don't want to be with their kids, they don't want to take their kids out with them to get something and are annoyed about it. YOU see it and think OMG that person is such a horrible parent but you don't know they just worked a double shift, haven't slept, didn't get
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| Posted 8/5/11 9:59 PM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by maybemommy10
and this is why i plan to beat my children in private
 so very wrong but...
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| Posted 8/5/11 10:14 PM |
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BAM 2009
I am who I am!!!
Member since 5/09 6081 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by kerrycec03
Posted by NervousNell
Could you imagine what the case load would be like if everyone was picking up the phone reporting a parent yelling at their kid in Dunkin Donuts, the mall, Target?
It would be out of control and the kids who really DO need help, wouldn't get it.
I can't imagine calling them up and saying- "Um, yes, I just witnessed a dad who was REALLY mean to his poor son! He yelled at him in Target! I got his plate number- can you check him out?"
EXACTLY!!! I also find it hard to believe that somebody 15 feet away would see a kid bleeding from their mouth....I know DS will bang his arm in the shopping cart at target and scream "I has a BOO BOO"....is somebody going to report me?? JMO
Well..I am not blind...It wasn't hard to see the BRIGHT RED blood dripping down his chin. And the father yelling why was his mouth bleeding!! The mother said to him "I hit him".... Good enough for you!!! Don't call me on something when you weren't there to see it for yourself...
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| Posted 8/5/11 10:19 PM |
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neenie
Member since 5/05 22351 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
I always wonder where people's own kids are and what those kids are doing while their parents are watching and judging others
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| Posted 8/6/11 1:32 AM |
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BAM 2009
I am who I am!!!
Member since 5/09 6081 total posts
Name:
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Re: Can I just say....spinoff to bad mom/ dad posts
Posted by neenie
I always wonder where people's own kids are and what those kids are doing while their parents are watching and judging others
In case you are talking about me, DS was in the van with my husband at the time!!!!
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| Posted 8/6/11 1:35 AM |
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