Can you please help calm my fears?

I know there are similar threads on this topic - I've read them all - but could still use some reassurance.

I'm having a scheduled c/s on Tuesday morning unless my little guy decides to arrive on his own in the next 3 days and I am absolutely terrified.

Can you please share your best c/s advice, tidbit on what to expect the no one told you, and that I'll be ok? My anxiety is through the roof and I just want me and my baby boy to be okay. Its def not how I expected to have my first baby but whatever it takes!

Thanks!

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I can't help with the C-section because I've never had one but since they were letting you wait it out on your own will they not consider trying an induction? Would you be more comfortable with that?

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

Awe, I know how you feel. I had an emergency section and everything was great. It will be fine.

Just take an easy for a couple of weeks after.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I remember the fear. It was all consuming and had me crying my eyes out the night before. I had preeclampsia and had no choice.

After the fact when I was finally holding DD I couldn't understand why I was so worried. Later still, when I got out of bed for the first time, and took a shower at the hospital I remember thinking how much easier this surgery was compared to having my appendix removed. To date I still marvel at how much quicker I recovered from a c-section than an appendectomy.

The fears that I had were rational at the time. I was thinking back on my appendectomy recovery and believing with all my heart I wouldn't be able to take care of DD AND recover from surgery at the same time. The actual occurance proved that my fears were for naught, as I did do both with much greater ease than I thought possible at the time.

Good luck!!

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

i wanted a c-section. didn't want labor. ended up with both. labor, then emergency c. it really was easy. and they give you drugs afterward to control pain. truthfully, the pain wasn't that bad. i was up and moving 12 hours later. and i was feeling so mcuh better (since i had felt so awful while i was pregnant)

i had a scheduled c with the second one. it was even easier since i didn't actually go into labor ahead of time. recovery was easy. just don't push to hard to begin with. take everything slowly. and you will be fine. its really not so bad at all.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I've had 2 c-sections. The 2nd one was scheduled and because I knew what to expect, it was a much better experience. So, here are a couple of things I would have found good to know ...

*They're going to put on some weird really tight socks on you (without toes!) before the surgery.
*You'll drink some gross shot of antacid as well.
*The spinal is no big deal. Your DH will not be there, but will soon arrive. Oh yeah, but if you're easily freaked, don't look around too much.
*It's really freaky to feel nothing below your chest!
*You may feel like your breathing is a bit shallow--don't worry you can and you are breathing.
*You will be laying on a very VERY narrow table with your arms spread out (mine were not strapped down)--I felt like Jesus on the crucifix
*They will tilt you slightly on your side and you'll feel like you're about to drop face-down ...but you won't!
*If you're panicking, keep talking and try to joke around. If you're really freaking (who does that...that couldn't have been me... ) they can give you a sedative after the baby is out.
*I brought a small photo book of my older DD to get me through--I kept making my DH flip through it to focus me. You may consider bringing pictures of your honeymoon or another happy time.
*Afterwards, the nurses are going to clean you up (maybe even a bit roughly) and again...you may feel like they're going to drop you. At this point I had not a care in the world...my DD was just born!!!

These are a couple of details from *my* experience before the surgery. I left out one or two tidbits..hehehe...and I have a bunch more for the recovery period. I guess those are for a separate post!

Hey good luck...you're at the finish line!! Seriously, if *I* (they most squeamish, easily freaked out individual) can do it twice...ANYONE can do it!!!

Message edited 11/15/2008 12:20:51 PM.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

The advice I was given when I was going in for my scheduled c-section was:

take the pain medicine as often as they'll let you.

get up and move around as soon as you can. it helps break up the gas (make sure you take the gas pills they give you in the hospital) and will ultimately make you feel better faster.

Take any help that anyone offers. My ILs offered to come every day for a week once DH went back to work and at first I didn't want them to come, but once I had the baby I really appreciated it. I couldn't get around too well and they took care of all the cleaning and cooking so all I had to worry about was me and the baby.

It will all be ok. You'll be fine and in the end you will have a wonderful new baby.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I am sure you and your baby will be fine. I went through labor, dilated to 10 centimeters with an epi that did not work at all and pushed for 4 hours until it was clear her head could not descend so I ended up with a C section. It was perfectly fine!!! Honestly at that point I was relieved and once they put the epi in again ( this time by the head of the dept) I felt great. One trick is to get walking and moving as soon as they say it is ok. I had a great experience.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

The best piece of advice that I had wished I had known before my c-section ( which to me was great and a fairly easy recovery ) is to expect to have some issues with gas (sorry if TMI) but really if you can, start asking for something for it even before it becomes an issue...The day before I was going home, the pain from gas was pretty bad, and I ended up getting a suppository ( icky- but I did not care, I was in pain !)...Also, drink the ginger tea, it helps !!!! You and baby will do great !!!

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

Erins thread really said it all...

My c-section was scheduled and I had a great experience...

The worst part was the spinal, and that was equivalent to a few bee stings.

The only advice Ill add is: dont be a hero, take the pain meds!

The key to healing is getting up and moving around, you wont be able to do that w/o meds.

I tried to just do motrin after the 1st day, and that was the most painful shower I ever took- after that I had them bring my meds every 4hrs as scheduled!

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I had a last min c-section bc she only made it to 6cms. By that time I couldnt breathe and just wanted her out so for me it wasnt a matter of wanting her vaginally anymore...I just wanted her out. BUT to be honest with you...it was quick, baby was out and there was absolutely no pain at all during the procedure. Just alot of pulling. Next AM I felt a little lightheaded and DONT BE SHY...hit the pain med button...LOL Its not that bad but why feel it. The next few weeks were ok. I just felt a little like hunched over rather then upright. I dont know if I was trying not to pull out my stitches or what but it felt a bit odd. If I can say anything bad at all about the procedure...til this day I still feel a mild soreness. It will be okay!

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

well I had a scheduled C and DS came early. the best part ab out the C is a few minutes after they start your baby will be out~!!!! if you were pushing, well that could take forever. I was very happy w/ my C sec experience eveyrone was joking around in the OR making me laugh. its so routine. Recovery is a little tough, I will say that, but the pain is very managable just keep on top of the meds. Don't be scared, just knkow these docs do so many of these every day


ask for Mylicon right after the surgery for gas! and you may want to start taking colace once you start eating bc the percocet can really constipate you. The docs told me to take colace when I was leaving the hospital 5 days LATER< needless to say, the first poo was tough, take it from the beginning

Message edited 11/15/2008 5:25:43 PM.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I can remember this feelign so well! Last year when I agreed to my scheduled c-section due to DS's size I was terrified, I had never had surgery, had never been in the hospital, the only IV I ever had was a pediatric one when I got my wisdom teeth out! I cried my eyes out thinking about SURGERY>

But the anxiety leading up was soo much worse than the actual day!

I went in got my IV (hurt more than anything else!!!) watched some TV, walked in to the OR (very intimidating) got my spinal (barely felt a thing), laid down and they were on their way.

Recovery was pretty smooth, I can't for the life of me say that it could have been any easier had I had a v-birth.

My advice:
- Tell family and friends you dont want visitors on the first day. Its just a very overwhelming experience, and to have 20 people come by is just too much! My SIL gave me this advice and it was great...DS's grandparents all came by but that was it, and by visiting hours (I had DS at 9:54AM) I was exhausted, and a little high on pain killers to be honest.

- Pass the GAS! Dont be shy, throw your mannors out the window, if you have to fart let it all out! It totally helps you when you start getting around.
- On the day after delivery they will let you get out of bed,you will be sore, it will not be comfy, but get up and walk around as much as possible. I used to walk to the nursery and look at the other babies at 5am..I walked to the L&D rooms and even paced the hall with a mom in labor. The walking helps you alot.

- Rest whenever you can, you have the rest of your life to get up in the middle of the night/day to care for your LO, if you are FF, let DH take a feeding so you can rest. I was BF but decided to supplement in the hospital because I was so wiped out at night that I let the nurses feed DS at night...I think that was one of the reasons I felt so good was because I got some sleep in the hospital. If you want to EBF then do so but once the baby sleeps, try to catch some shut eye yourself....even if people are visiting...you can all chat more later.

- Dont be afraid to take pain killers if needed.

- Dont be afraid to let people help you whenever necessary.

- Just relax and enjoy your baby!

Trust me, the minute you hear your baby cry, it doenst matter how they got into this world or how nervous you were....you will be willign to cut off your own arm, just to hear that first cry! Its worth every second and you will nearly forget the "surgery" aspect at that point!

ETA: Erins thread was great...
Some other things you may not know...
- You may get sick, I threw up all over DH and myself...Talk to the Drs throughout let them know if you are feeling anything odd....
- Erin is right about the breathing thing, I had a coughing fit because I felt so odd
- if you had heartburn, the MINUTE they pull DS out you will feel instant relief. The day of surgery as I laid on the table I could feel DS in my rib cage, once they pulled him out it was a great feeling.
- You may feel them moving stuff around as they get DS out, but dont worry tehy put it back jsut kidding but I could feel them pushing stuff around and the sensation fo DS being born.
- DH will be the first person to hold your DS, this bothered me leading up to the big day...not sure why but it did, now I could care less, but at the time I cried over it.
- If you are having a Spinal, they wear off faster than epis.... So you will regain feeling quicker...

Message edited 11/15/2008 5:40:40 PM.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

You will be OK!

The best advice i can give is to get up and take a shower as soon as you can! Insist on it! Walk around to the nursery, around the corridors as much as you can. That is what I did and it was painful, but my recovery was not bad at all. I walked every single day. I tried not to sit around too much. It will hurt getting into bed so maybe plan on sleeping on the couch for a night or two, that's what I did. Seriously, the most painful days when I got home were the first two days. After one week, I was fine!

Good luck!

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I had scheduled both times. It is fine. For me the fear and anticipation was far worse than the recovery. My best advice is big panties and bring your boppy to the hospital.

You will be fine. Honestly for me the IV hurt more than my recovery. I had never had an IV, never had surgery or been in a hospital over night I was petrified and it was fine.



Any questions please feel free to FM me.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

Having a c/s was really great! I wish I planned on doing it all along - the recovery isn't the best, but hey, if you have to be cut open and have stitches somewhere, would rather it be there and not on my hoo haa!!

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I had an unexpected c section and I was soooo scared. Everything was fine in the end. You have to remember , the Dr's do these all day everyday so its soooo routine.

Not gonna lie - the recovery was tough for me. The first 2 days in the hospital I was on heavy pain meds that really worked so that was helpful. It did hurt that first time they made me get up and walk around but the nurses help you. Once you start walking around, you feel so much better

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I had a c-section, but they knocked me out for it because I had blood issues. Best advice they gave me was to try and walk around as much as you can. It hurts like hell, and you might just walk to the end of the hall, but the more you get up, the easier the recovery.
Dont be a hero either. TAKE THE PAIN MEDICATION!! You want to utilize the hospital and get yourself better for that baby!! It's all worth it in the end though, when you see and hold that baby. GOOD LUCK

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I can't really add much to what everybody else has already said other than to take the pain meds around the clock. It is much easier to control pain before it gets out of control, KWIM? And when you still have the epidural, hit the button every 15mins -- that will keep a constant level of pain meds in your system so that your pain will be better controlled.

I had a really tough time in the first few days with pain. After they took out my epidural, I asked for pain meds 1/2 hour before I knew I was going to get up, so it helped blunt the pain and I do think it helped.

By the time you go home, you'll hardly need the pain meds. I think I used it 2-3 times after I was discharged.

Lastly, once the staples come out, you'll instantly feel cured of all post-op pain.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

Everyone posted all the advice that I would give you. .. just to reinforce:

Take the pain medication. I made sure to take it an hour before they would bring my DD to me so that I was in less pain when I was spending time with DD.

Walk as much as you can after, it hurts, but walking helps with the gas pains.

Make sure to wear the abdominal wrap they give you. Apply pressure to your stitches if you need to cough or sneeze, even just to laugh. It can be painful and applying pressure helps.

The boppy pillow really helps.

I had a rough recovery and felt that I was never going to feel better... but here I am almost 3 weeks later and feel fantastic. It does get better every single day.

I had an unexpected C Section and was very unhappy about it, but when they bring you your DC and you hold them in your arms, it makes everything ok.

You will be just fine, its over in a matter of minutes which is really nice... and then you will have your beautiful baby in your arms.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

I suppose the anticipation of a section can be a bit nerve racking.

I was an emergency section. And by the time we made the decision to do it, I had labored (naturally/no pain med) for over 29 hours. I was exhausted and just wanted the kid out.

The procedure was a breeze. Recovery was a little painful, but just take the pain meds. They really do help.

Try not to over exert yourself. It will only slow down the process.

And if all else fails, just think of the amazing outcome you get out of it all!

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

My scheduled section was the best experience ever. The spinal was no big deal and the surgery was quick.
The oxygen calmed me down and made me breathe better...and I agree with a PP...don't look around too much or listen to the doctors. Have your dh talk to you and distract you.

Take the drugs afterwards, take a shower and walk whenever you can.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

katie, read my birth story. i had the BEST experience with a scheduled c-section.


the best pieces of advice i got:

1. don't worry about the spinal. if you get nauseous, tell them RIGHT away - they will give you something to take care of it. if you start shaking, it's normal - they will keep you warm. the anesthesiologist is your friend - they will be there the whole time taking care of YOU and they are truly amazing people.

2. get up as soon as you feel able. i had a c-section at 8:30am and by 9pm i was out of bed and walking myself to the bathroom. DH "helped" but really. if i took it slowly, i was able to do it myself. i am not a martyr by any means but it was so nice to be able to pee without a catheter!

3. what no one told me: once your catheter is out, even if you feel like you have to pee really bad, you might have trouble relaxing your muscles enough to go. don't worry - it WILL get better. i was able to pee on my own by the next morning.

4. shyness will go out the window - your nurse will be there cleaning you down there (you'll be bleeding as much as someone who had a vaginal birth) until you can clean yourself, so just deal with it.

5. if you are tired, or want to BF your baby, KICK EVERYONE OUT OF YOUR ROOM. i made the mistake of trying to please too many people and as a result by day 2 i was so tired i couldn't see straight. a nurse noticed and took DS for a few hours - that was the best sleep i got, and everyone that came to visit noticed how much better i looked the next day

you will be FINE - i promise i can't wait to hear that your DS has arrived!!!

ETA: if you get pains in your shoulders and back, those are gas pains (from when you were open during the c-section). ask the nurse for gas pills, i forget what they were called. they will help you a LOT!! those gas pains are going to hurt worse than your c-section incision.

speaking of your incision, don't be surprised if you feel worse on day 3 than day 1. once the meds wear off fully, you will feel it more. totally normal.

Message edited 11/16/2008 6:20:31 PM.

Re: Can you please help calm my fears?

Everyone has said exactly what I would say. I never dreamt I would need a C- section. Even when I found out that DS was breech, I had visions of him turning and being able to deliver vaginally. I wound up having an emergency C-section because he came 2 weeks early. It was a great experience and if I had to have another one, I wouldn't hesitate. Definitely get up and moving as soon as you can! Take a shower... it made me feel "human" again. Also, take pain medication as needed!! It really will help. Don't be afraid to ask for anything you need.

Once you see your little boy, it's all worth it. I promise. You won't be able to recall why you were so scared.