Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

There are 2 reasons I dont want alcohol at the christening. Number 1, I don't think I want it there since there will be many children invited. I can't see parents coming and having a few and then getting in the car with their kids..I also have some family issues . My aunts Husband last weekend almost ruined my brothers wedding because of his drinking, he started with a few people on my moms side of the family, and basically told my uncle to F himself, started with my other aunt and cousin..I almost died.. he was kicked out and told not to come back. He called my brother and mom to apologize and says he dont know why he did that and barely remembers (Just a poor Excuse)...but he wants to buy my uncle baseball tickets and to apologize to him. Anyway now those people he upset, dont want to come to anything if he will be invited....I just cant..I am so upset..I feel like Iam in the middle..Is it rude to tell my Aunt she can come, but her husband isnt welcome?? This is supposed to be a happy time in my life and my DD and I will not have it ruined...Please tell me what you would do and how to deal with it? I am so confused and want to cry...

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

I think you should invite everyone you want there and let them figure out if they want to come or not.

Easier said than done, I know, but I think it is the only way to go.

As for alcohol, we also run a tab at functions like this, even with kid parties so I would not eliminate alcohol based on the antics of one family member. I would however have no qualms about telling him up front that in light of what happened I would appreciate it if HE would refrain.

Sorry you are going through this-I have own share of family drama so I know what it's like

Message edited 4/23/2010 12:11:02 PM.

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

Don't have alcohol if it makes you uncomfortable.

Personally, I wouldn't not invite your aunt's husband (he is your uncle as well,e ven if by marriage....) unless this is a constant problem with him. Unfortunately people do make mistakes, and if this was a one time mistake, let him try to make it up to your other uncle and don't leave him out.

ETA-We have beer and wine at our family parties

Message edited 4/23/2010 12:13:14 PM.

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

We had beer and wine. I feel that people can and should make their own choices about drinking. I know if I have a drink at a party with the kids then Dh will not and vice versa. DH and I will never get loaded but enjoy and drink or 2. As far as your family goes they too, will do what they will do and unfortunatly you can not change it or control it. Good luck to you and try to enjoy!

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

He is to put it bluntly a real @sshole, he is always obnoxious even when not drinking. This is also a man who has had 2 Dwi's in the last 2 years...I am just embarrassed by the whole thing. He made me cry last Sunday, gave my Aunt a panic attack and just made us all feel uncomfortable.. it was supposed to be a perfect day for my brother and he had the whole place looking at him especially since he had to be escorted out since he would not leave. Why does ther always have to be some kind of family drama..Why cant everyone be normal!

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

if he almost ruined your brother's wedding, he should not be welcome to your christening

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

Posted by Jonsgirl04

He is to put it bluntly a real @sshole, he is always obnoxious even when not drinking. This is also a man who has had 2 Dwi's in the last 2 years...I am just embarrassed by the whole thing. He made me cry last Sunday, gave my Aunt a panic attack and just made us all feel uncomfortable.. it was supposed to be a perfect day for my brother and he had the whole place looking at him especially since he had to be escorted out since he would not leave. Why does ther always have to be some kind of family drama..Why cant everyone be normal!

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

Thanks ladies for listening and helping out! I appreciate all your advice and you taking the time to give me your opinions.

If everyone all could be like this happy guy drinking then alcohol would not be a problem!!! LOL..

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

Can you call your aunt and let her know she is still invited to the Christening party, but in light of recent events, you would appreciate it if your uncle would "sit this one out" and not come? You can tell her your whole family is still really upset over the whole issue, and you really want this day to be about your baby's Christening, and not about family drama.

Re: Christening, Alcohol and dealing with a family problem.

We generally don't provide alcohol at events. Pretty much everyone on my father's side are alcoholics - some recovering, some not - and I refuse to enable them. Everyone knows not to expect it and it hasn't been a problem yet.

I also have an uncle who is a complete jerk. He's been around for 20 years so by now everyone pretty much ignores him and my aunt gives an excuse for why he's not there. He's definitely not missed.