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dealing with bad habits of other children

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Hotmamma408
LIF Adolescent

Member since 6/08

692 total posts

Name:

dealing with bad habits of other children

DS is 4 and he has been coming home from school saying inappropriate words and just acting totally different (fresh, sillier than normal, hitting himself in the face when I speak to him). I tell him we don't speak/act like that, ask him where he is picking up these habits, I've given time outs, threatened taking things. DS is pushing the envelope to see what I pick up on/let him get away with and he knows its not acceptable. DS has told me who it is that he is learning all these wonderful things from, and another parent has told me her DS has shared the same with her.
My issue is, do I tell the teacher? Do I tell my son not to hang out with this child? Or, do I just keep enforcing our rules and pray he will always go the right route? I feel like they are so impressionable at this age and I'm afraid I'm losing my well behaved boy. Any advice would be great!

Posted 5/23/13 2:40 PM
 

Adri
Joy!

Member since 5/05

3116 total posts

Name:
A

Re: dealing with bad habits of other children

I would just keep enforcing the rules. Unfortunately it is just the beginning since at school they are going to be around so many kids with different behaviors.

Posted 5/23/13 3:07 PM
 

KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination

Member since 5/05

4431 total posts

Name:
Karen

dealing with bad habits of other children

I deal with this all the time. It's exhausting! I just keep repeating our rules and repeat about 1000 times a day "be your own person".

Posted 5/23/13 3:34 PM
 

itsbabytime
LIF Adult

Member since 11/05

9644 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: dealing with bad habits of other children

I've had this issue ALOT this year since DS started K. Right away I noticed him doing/saying things that I knew were coming from other kids. I felt like you - my DS was always such a good boy and, being the oldest he was very innocent and sweet. Then, he started K and started picking up bad things especially from kids that had older siblings. He was even using words and phrases he had no idea what they meant! At first, I felt like you - the other kids were the problem. Then, I realized it was my problem and my child's problem. My DS had to learn not to imitate and repeat bad behavior. There will always be kids doing and saying the wrong things. And, what makes it even worse is that these kids are often getting a lot of positive attention for their bad behavior from the peers - makes it even more attractive for kids like ours to copy. It is important for our child to learn that being good and doing the right thing means NOT imitating and joining in with bad behavior.

My point is, I wouldn't say anything to the teacher etc. This isn't the other boys issue - now it is yours. We have to teach our kids to do the right thing, to recognize wrong behavior and NOT to copy it. I explain to my DS when I notice a new "habit" that it is wrong, why it is wrong and what happens when the other child acts like that (they get in trouble, the other moms see the behavior and don't want play dates with him etc. etc.). Now that the year is almost over I can honestly say 9/10 times my DS knows who to look up to and who NOT to imitate! Good luck!

Message edited 5/23/2013 4:05:03 PM.

Posted 5/23/13 4:04 PM
 

rojerono
Happiest.

Member since 8/06

13803 total posts

Name:
Jeannie

Re: dealing with bad habits of other children

Posted by itsbabytime

I've had this issue ALOT this year since DS started K. Right away I noticed him doing/saying things that I knew were coming from other kids. I felt like you - my DS was always such a good boy and, being the oldest he was very innocent and sweet. Then, he started K and started picking up bad things especially from kids that had older siblings. He was even using words and phrases he had no idea what they meant! At first, I felt like you - the other kids were the problem. Then, I realized it was my problem and my child's problem. My DS had to learn not to imitate and repeat bad behavior. There will always be kids doing and saying the wrong things. And, what makes it even worse is that these kids are often getting a lot of positive attention for their bad behavior from the peers - makes it even more attractive for kids like ours to copy. It is important for our child to learn that being good and doing the right thing means NOT imitating and joining in with bad behavior.

My point is, I wouldn't say anything to the teacher etc. This isn't the other boys issue - now it is yours. We have to teach our kids to do the right thing, to recognize wrong behavior and NOT to copy it. I explain to my DS when I notice a new "habit" that it is wrong, why it is wrong and what happens when the other child acts like that (they get in trouble, the other moms see the behavior and don't want play dates with him etc. etc.). Now that the year is almost over I can honestly say 9/10 times my DS knows who to look up to and who NOT to imitate! Good luck!




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Very Well Said!

Posted 5/23/13 4:41 PM
 
 

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