Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

YES!!! I was convinced I was having a boy, people kept saying it, I took the intellegender test and I just fell for it...when they said GIRL I busted out crying thinking my DH was upset but he wasn't. It was my hormones and the whole experience I guess...the next day I got over it and I love my DD more than anything in the world!

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

I wanted a healthy girl when pregnant the first time and got a healthy girl-I was elated.

I wanted another healthy girl when pregnant the second time (even used to just put pink when TTC).

I was disappointed when I found out I was having a boy and I think I am being smited a little bit for it-to show me that all I really want is a healthy child and that I am a selfish B for thinking that his gender matters at all. It doesn't, I love him to pieces and worry sick over him and think how lucky he and our family will be if only he is a healthy kid and if he is not I still have to remember how lucky we are just to have him

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

I cried when I found out DS was a boy but they were happy tears (ecstatic tears) because I've always always always wanted a son. And then I felt guilty to DD that I was so happy to have a boy.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

No--I was really happy to have a baby, period. The sex did not matter at all--I was much more concerned that he be healthy. I don't think it's awful to feel sad, but this was not an issue for me.

It may have helped that I was absolutely convinced I was having a boy from the start, so finding out he is a boy just confirmed what I believed would be true. But a girl would have been welcome also.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

I always just knew I would have a daughter -- I think this is pretty common for most women. So when I found out #1 was a boy I was a little shocked just because I had convinced myself that it was a girl -- I almost had to "mourn the loss" of the little girl I had made up.

With #2 I knew from the start it was another boy. I was happy about the idea of brothers, but still missed the idea of a daughter. When the gender was confirmed I was really conflicted because I liked the idea of same gender sibs, but was a little sad I wouldn't get to pick out a girl name or buy girl things.

I really didn't have a problem until family members started making comments to me about missing out because I didn't have a girl -- that's what made me cry. I felt like everyone was so disappointed for me and that broke my heart.

As it is, I love having 2 boys -- they have so much fun together and I feel like they will always be best friends in a way boy/giril sibs could never be. If I have a thrid I'm either not finding out the gender or keeping it a secret.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

Posted by CrankyPants

I wanted a healthy girl when pregnant the first time and got a healthy girl-I was elated.

I wanted another healthy girl when pregnant the second time (even used to just put pink when TTC).

I was disappointed when I found out I was having a boy and I think I am being smited a little bit for it-to show me that all I really want is a healthy child and that I am a selfish B for thinking that his gender matters at all. It doesn't, I love him to pieces and worry sick over him and think how lucky he and our family will be if only he is a healthy kid and if he is not I still have to remember how lucky we are just to have him

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

No judgement here and I definitely don't think you're a bad person. That's a very emotional moment and you can't control how you feel.

I believe that people's opinions on the subject will vary in some cases based on their experience. Those who struggled with IF, those who have had miscarriages, those who have a child with some kind of disability at birth might come from a different place on the matter, than a person who had no trouble getting pregnant. Of course, EVERYONE wants a healthy child. But, when you've struggled to get to that point, the health part of it really trumps all of it, IMO.

It was interesting, when we were PG with our girls and we found out the sex, they knew right away that Deborah was a girl. With Meaghan, they had a 90% proof that she was also a girl but it wasn't confirmed. There was a part of me that had a small twinge of hope that they'd be wrong, but it lasted for maybe a nano-second.

Then when DW would tell people that it was two girls, alot of people asked if "Don was upset?" I understood why they asked because it's natural for a father to want a son, but given our circumstances, after that quick nano-second, it was the furthest thing from my mind.

Today, we get asked if we're going to "try for the boy". Another natural question, but the fact is, we went through a lot, maybe less than some have or are going through, maybe more than some. We feel blessed and lucky with what we have. And there's such a thing as "quitting while you're ahead"

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

no. we didnt find out the sex we wanted the surprise. but while pg, we were told there was a chance that the baby would have downs. when DS came out completely normal, i cried tears of happiness and relief. even with the next one, i dont care the gender. just a healthy baby is all i will ever ask for.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

No, we stayed team green so I couldn't be disappointed when a beautiful, healthy baby was handed to me both times.

But, I don't flame you for needing time to adjust your vision of your family - perfectly normal, and just because you may get the opposite of what you visioned, doesn't mean for one second you won't love that child.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

No, I didn't. This is why I think parents that really want a certain sex should wait to find out until the baby is born. This way there is no disappointment once they hand you that healthy baby!

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

DH was hoping for a boy and i was secretly hoping for a girl. When we found out that ds was in fact a ds I was really happy that dh got his wish.

However, that was dc#1 and I knew there would be plenty of time for me to get a dd.

Now that we are thinking about ttc#2 I am not embarassed to admit that I am partial to having a dd.

Yes, I pray for a healthy baby. That goes without saying. Yes, I know there are women that would do anything to get pregnant and are strugging like he11 to become a mommy- and I sincerely hope their dreams come true.

However, none of those things mean that it is wrong for me to have a little girl to buy frilly little dresses for and take to get manicures. Also, it doesn't mean that if I get a ds#2 that I won't love him just as much as I would have loved a dd.

JMO.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

Posted by BaroqueMama

First of all, you are not in any way awful if you are disappointed.
I really was hoping that Chase was a girl at first because I have a sister and she is my best friend and I wanted the same thing for Ava, but honestly, now that I have a boy, I could never imagine having another girl! I wasn't upset that he was a boy, but definitely a little disappointed. But now, no way, I am so happy to have him Plus, I believe that everything happens for a reason and if I have a boy and a girl, that's because that's the way it was meant to be for me

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

I just wanted a healthy baby and thank God everyday for him!

Now that I have a boy I am very happy I had boy and know I was meant to have a son first!

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

Nope.........not at all. I cried from utter and complete surprise and happiness. I swore it was a . I don't know why I just thought the entire pregnancy I was having a and I didn't even want to get excited about the possibility of a because in my head..........it was a . When they pulled her out and the OB announced, "It's A Girl" I almost fell over. I cried but from excitement and happiness. It never really mattered to either of us if it was a or a . Sorry for the cliche but we just were happy to have a healthy little baby.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

I actually cried LOUD like a maniac with tears of joy when I found out DS was a because thats what I was hoping for. I cried so loud that a doctor and a nurse came running into the sonogram room all concerned.

But if I found out if the baby was going to be a I think I would have said to myself "oh crap... now I will have to try for a "

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

i didn't. We have 3 girls and love all of them. To be honest i don't know what i'd do with a boy

On the other hand, my SIL was very upset when she found out she was having a second boy. She see's our girls and wanted one sooooo bad, so when she found out the LO in her tummy was a boy she cried for a few days. Now she has come to accept it but it was a rough week there.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

yes with #1. i was hysterical for days because i "knew" i was having a girl. i was caught so off guard and all my dreams were shattered. now i do have a daughter as well and i'm so glad i had my son first. i don't regret my feelings because they were true feelings. and i don't let anyone try to make me feel badly.

everyone always say "just hope for a healthy baby" but that's not always possible when you're not thinking that way. i love DS more than anything in this world but at the time, i wasn't thinking in boy terms.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

Not at all!! I've always wanted a little girl. My mom is my best friend, and I cannot wait to share that relationship with my daughter one day. My husband from day one said he always wanted two little girls. EVERYONE told us we were having a boy. When I went for my level two I asked the doctor four times "are you sure it's a girl!?" We both could not be happier.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

Yes...going to be honest. I wanted a girl so badly for my second child, since I had a boy already. Now, of course, I feel so foolish...I couldn't adore him more. In fact, he's the child out of the three who I connect with the most. It doesn't matter one bit that he's a boy!

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

Posted by mlny

I did! For like a week! Idc who judges me for it!

I thought I read my body so well - I was 110% positive it was a girl - and to find out it was a boy - I was devastated! Not because I didn't want a son - but because I just had my heart set on a girl. Needless to say, I love my son more than anything - and when I have a second child, I won't be sad if I have another boy! It honestly seems silly to me now that I think back on it. But we're all entitled to our emotions. It doesn't mean we don't love the child any less

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

No way...I was thrilled to be having a boy! And next time around (God willing) I will be thrilled either way.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

With my DS, everyone was telling us it had to be a girl based on my symptoms and how I was carrying, so I think it was stuck in our head that we were having a girl. When at the level 2 we were told boy, we were both very surprised (but happy). With my DD- I really didnt care to much- I really wanted another boy so DS would have a brother but also really wanted my little girl. Deep down my gut was saying girl, but I tried to convince myself boy so I wouldnt be disappointed. When we heard girl at the sono me and my DH looked at each other with tears of joy. Honestly though, I really would have been so happy with another boy too.

Re: Did you cry tears of sadness after learning the sex?

I was there.

I wanted a son
I really thought it was a son

To say it was a girl was like "seriously, are you sure, check again"

I love AJ its easy to see

But I'd be lying if I said I was super duper happy it was a she instead of a he. She's my kiddo and I love her. She's mine and unique in her own very special ways.

I don't think of myself as compromising. I can't imagine if I had a son how it would have been because I don't have a son, I have a daughter.

I was bent on boy until nearly the middle of my last trimester. Then just accepted it was going to be a girl.

I was sad because in my mind I had imagined a boy, played with the image of a baby boy and grew that boy up in my mind.

Now i have a girl and she's a constant amazement and is so far the best thing that's ever happened.

Though sometimes when I think of a teenage girl.. i cringe and wish I did have a boy instead.. as the saying goes with a boy you only have to worry about one.... XXX with a girl you have to worry about all the ... XXX

I always think Moms & Sons have a special relationship and since my mother was a true nightmare.. I had nothing to expect, base or even prepare for when it came to having a daughter. But I think im doing alright. haha Just hope we can be as close as I want to be.