Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

I'm a bit torn and was hoping for some advice. On one hand, i want so badly to have a baby. I feel like im just mentally and emotionally ready and DH would love to have a baby now too. But on the other hand, there are so many places i wanted to see in the world that i wont be able to see with kids. I've never been to europe, or toured asia or south america. he11, ive never seen most of north america for that matter! am i wrong in thinking that i wont be able to take vacations like this with kids? i have so many people telling me to travel before i have kids.

did you do all you wanted before TTC?

Message edited 11/17/2008 8:41:30 PM.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

Nope I didn't get to do anything I wanted to do and once you have that little baby, none of that will matter

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

There's definitely a lot more traveling that I want to do. But, I know a lot of people who travel with their kids. Plus...I'm hoping there will be plenty of traveling later in life when we retire!

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

That's what I hear from lots of people also, but the way I look it is when we have a family we will go on vacations together. My parents started traveling when my sister and I were born and I remember those road trips to florida or other places they took us and it just makes me smile & to be honest with you, they took their first vacation to mexico about 2 years ago alone, they came home and said how weird it was without us. (i have 2 sisters) so it was always the 5 of us, there was always a discussion, soemthing interesting going on.
I think its just the way life goes, you grow up and soon you have your little ones that you go on vacation with. I can not wait to go on family trips, take the grandparents along also.

Just my opinion of course.
I know there are many married couples who just want to enjoy newlywed life and travel and all that good stuff.
Everyone has different ideas, dreams....
I've been with DH for a year and a half, married 7 months, and we started TTC 8 months ago so go figure, everyone is ready for different things at different times.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

I've done alot - not everything that I have ever wanted to do -- but if I did it all what fun would the future be?

You do need to be ready because it is the biggest commitment - and some people are ready at different times - there is nothing wrong with that at all.

I took my son, who was 13 months old at the time, to Italy with us this summer - it can be done. It won't be as easy, or as relaxing, if you do it with a child - but it will be just as memorable - if not more - because you have your little one in the memories also.

I don't have the words to explain to you how your life changes 1000 times over when you have a child - but - it becomes a million times better. My son is the best thing I have ever done with my life and I can't wait to have another one. For me, seeing his face - and his smile - is just the most amazing part of my day. I don't remember life without him - and it sounds so silly but he is truly our world!

Message edited 11/17/2008 8:57:13 PM.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

I would never suggest that you TTC if you aren't ready, but I always think there will be things you want or places to go or things to wait for.......We personally wanted a family more than we wanted anything else and that is why we had DS when we did and not to mention i'm not getting any younger and we want at least 2 if not 3 children.

If you are able financially you certainly can travel with your kids although it is harder.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

There were quite a few things that I wanted to do before we had DD and it took me a while to be okay with the fact that I wasn't going to be able to do certain things/go certain places.

But then I realized that I'll be done having kids by the time I'm 25 (possibly 28) which gives DH and I ALL the time in the world to travel and do everything we wanted before kids and we'll actually have the money and not to mention there is no reason you couldn't travel with your kids once they get a little older! I actually look forward to taking DD everywhere I went when I was younger, my parents have already decided that once she's 5 we're taking a family vacation to Disney.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

No... but I don't think having kids will stop me from doing those things!

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

Nope. I always told DH that I HAD to get to Ireland before we have kids.
But, I was/am sooo ready for kids. Plus, I have now been trying for 7 months with no succes, so I guess I should just make travel plans while I can!

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

Yes and no. If you asked me before I had DS I would have said, no I haven't done everything. But now that I have him, I feel like he is ALL I ever wanted to do with my life. I pride myself in the title "mom". To me, nothing could be better. Do I still have travel plans in my head and places I'd like to go, most definitely. But I fugure I will get to most of them at some point. But I also have full intentions of traveling with my children the way my parents traveled with my sister and me.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

Nope. I wanted to go to Grad School before we started TTC and I had hoped to travel a lot beforehand as well. We even talked about going to Europe after his next deployment.

Now that we'e started TTC, that isnt stopping us from planning our trip to Europe (or any other future trips and plans we have). Your life doesnt end when you have kids -- it becomes something you SHARE with them.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

Personally yes. We traveled a lot, partied a lot and also did a bunch of nothing (ordering food and vegging out on the couch all day) a lot. Career wise, I wish I went to law school but that got put on hold for a few reasons. But next year my goal is to do something about my career. Either do the law school or move on to another firm..

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

i feel that our life will be enhanced by having a baby. There is NO reason we won't travel, we will simply bring the baby/child wherever we go. We're not a couple who does a lot of 'staying home' and that will not change. It will simply mean we have an adorable baby/child to bring with us places...

we actually frequently talk about our child when they get back from summer vacation and ask him/her what they did....our child will have like 80 things they can list!

we'd own a house - that's all i'd change...

Message edited 11/17/2008 11:48:27 PM.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

Most DEFinitely.

I had some of the greatest opportunities and was fortunate to be able to travel a lot and live in some of the most beautiful places.

I had a very exciting and sometimes often "dangerous" lifestyle which made for LOTS of good times.

I had freedom to go and take off and to do what I wanted, whenever I wanted.

I owned my own clothing store on one of the most desired real estates for 10 years.

I enjoyed my life then very much and now...I am enjoying it even MORE.

Nothing I've done, seen, or experienced can compare to the eyes I am experiencing life through on a day to day basis

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

Yes, I have pretty much completed my "wish list", I guess that's why I am now TTC at 40 and worrying that I left it too late.

Sure, there are a few places I would still like to visit, but I figure they can be done in retirement.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

I agree with this :
Personally yes. We traveled a lot, partied a lot and also did a bunch of nothing (ordering food and vegging out on the couch all day) a lot.

We also first:
bought a house
I finished my degree
married for a few years before TTC


We traveled to the carribean and Europe frequently.
I think the reality is you will still travel, but wont be traveling thru Europe or laying on a beach for a week in the bahamas.
Atleast no one I know with kids does these trips!

so many people with children always tell me :travel a lot, eat out a lot now because once you have kids it changes.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

Before TTC I would have said that I had not done everything I had wanted...but when I gave birth to my son those things faded away...having him was the most amazing thing I have ever done.

Today I can 100% tell you that I have done the most amazing thing I could have thought of and I have no regrets.

Plus...one day we will go to Europe..we will go to all those places we had hoped to see...do all the things we have hoped to have done...but for me it will be more rewarding to share my experience with my son...to come home to him and his family and show them my treasures...to have them waiting for me.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

Yep! I'm done with school, have a great career, paid off all of my credit card debt (I used to owe a fortune), married a wonderful man & own a home with him! I partied so much in my teens & early 20s that it's all out of my system & I've travelled quite a bit the past 5-10 years. My brother lives in Europe, so the travelling that I'd still like to do will continue (we're going to start meeting up in different countries every year next year)...I've led a very fulfilling & fortunate life, so I'm ready

Message edited 11/18/2008 8:26:09 AM.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

I didn't, but I'm 33 and DH is 40. There's never going to be the perfect time to TTC, but we have a bigger house now, so why not?

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

The way I see it, is I can do all the traveling I want either when my kids get older, or after they are grown and DH and I can go alone.

My MIL goes all over the world! She loves to travel.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

This question is posted on the pregnancy board too!

It's great to read the responses from both sides of the fence.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

I'd say so...
*Married the love of my life
*We own a home
*Traveled to London, Rome, Florence, Paris & Amsterdam
*We have stable good jobs
*I got to spoil my nephew and spend precious precious time with him alone, just us.

I wish we could be a little more financially stable. I mean we're fine but I'd like it to be a bit more but that's what happens when you fulfill things in your life before having a child (aka- europe and a home)


Of course I'd love to travel more and do more to our house but I don't think I can wait much longer to have a baby. They would be such a blessing to have in our lives.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

pretty much.

On a different note, I have taken Josh almost everywhere with me.

He's been to Yosemite on a week long adventure, skiing, beach vacations...

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

I wanted to travel more and be a home owner , both of which will happen regardless .
My parents travelled all over the place with AND without us .
I have no problem travelling without my future kids and I know that I will be a home owner. I hope that life doesn't stop once you have kids, it just changes for the better.

Re: Did you do everything you wanted to do with your life before you started TTC?

i can see where you are coming from with the traveling.. if you feel in your heart that you want to do this.. then thats your answer.. then have kids later on..

for me.. i have always wanted to travel before kids... but kids is more important to me in the grand scheme of things..