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2ofakind05
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/08 754 total posts
Name: Robyn
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Discipline
DS is going to be 4 next month and has PDD-NOS. When he is told no and he gets upset he starts throwing things. He will throw all his toys, hit the blinds(he already broke one of them), and he tries to hit me. I don't know what to do. I know he is trying to get my attention, and I have tried ignoring him. That only makes it worse! I can not accept him hitting me at all. I won't let him destroy the house and break stuff I can't afford to replace, like windows and blinds, and whatever else he goes for. I have tried putting him in time out and he won't stay. He'll keep getting up and run to throw something else, or hit the blinds in another room. He will say he is sorry, but he will do the exact same thing thing next time. I'm afraid if I don't figure out how to handle this now, it is only going to get worse. Today seemed to be a particularly bad day. Most days he is really good. Does anyone have any advice on how to react to the throwing and hitting? Please.
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Posted 8/15/12 6:21 PM |
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whyteach
LIF Adult
Member since 8/06 2697 total posts
Name: Christina
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Re: Discipline
Time outs never worked for our daughter. We have found putting her in her room most of the time works. We don't keep a lot in there that she can throw around and I always keep the cord on the blinds high enough so she can't reach it. She is 5, so we wil keep her in her room for 5 min (sometimes holding the door shut). After 5 minutes we will go in and say "all done?".....if she is, we hug, kiss and move on. If she continues, we start over. Good luck!
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Posted 8/15/12 11:34 PM |
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Domino
Always My Miracle
Member since 9/05 9923 total posts
Name:
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Re: Discipline
When you say he wont stay in time out how long have you tried? I was a Super Nanny fanatic and went into it with realistic expectations. I started timeouts with DS at around 18months (too early for him to really get it). It was hard. Very hard. But I was consistent. Every time he got out of timeout, I put him back in. DH and I took turns because it was exhausting. It took a good month of sometimes putting him back in time out over and over for an hour or more but I will tell you, at 34 months he sits where I put him now. He will still have a fit while in timeout but he has learned that he is not getting out until he calms down.
Another suggestion is to put him in a "safe zone." For us it is his room. I tell him he cant come out until he has calmed down and then i close the door (and watch him on the monitor). I noticed a lot of this behavior is done when he is looking for attention and so I try to use a lot of ignoring tactics when disciplining him.
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Posted 8/16/12 10:30 PM |
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2ofakind05
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/08 754 total posts
Name: Robyn
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Re: Discipline
I have tried to keep him there for an hour or so. When he gets up, he immediately goes to smack the blinds or throw something. I don't know where a safe zone would be. I have tried his room but he just destroys the whole thing. I'm afraid he'll throw something through a window or break the TV, or even rip all the blinds off the window completely. I feel like after 30 minutes of putting him back in time out, he is just getting angrier and so I'm not sure if I'm being counter productive by continuing.
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Posted 8/17/12 9:09 AM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
Name:
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Re: Discipline
I also did the Super Nanny approach. Used it with Time Outs and Bed time. I just kept doing it over and over and over again. Now, at age 5, I just have to say "1, 2...." and he stops me "Mommy, don't count". He hates time out and will correct his behavior immediatley. Our "safe" spot is the bottom of our staircase.
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Posted 8/17/12 10:07 PM |
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adeline27
LIF Adult
Member since 5/06 3121 total posts
Name: Angela
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Re: Discipline
Ignoring, redirecting and limiting the toys and storing them away on shelves helped me. I also would shorten his time out to calm down no more than 5 minutes. 5 minutes is an eternity to a 4 yr old. I don't think time outs up to an hour will do anything but get them more upset. I also force a clean/pick up for anything thrown before we move on.
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Posted 8/21/12 10:48 AM |
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Domino
Always My Miracle
Member since 9/05 9923 total posts
Name:
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Re: Discipline
Posted by adeline27
Ignoring, redirecting and limiting the toys and storing them away on shelves helped me. I also would shorten his time out to calm down no more than 5 minutes. 5 minutes is an eternity to a 4 yr old. I don't think time outs up to an hour will do anything but get them more upset. I also force a clean/pick up for anything thrown before we move on.
Wanted to clarify that I agree that you should not put a 4 year old in timeout for an hour. I put DS in time out for 2 minutes (he is 2 y/o) but it took a whole hour in the beginning to make him STAY in timeout for the 2 minutes. Once he finally realized that I meant business it became less of a struggle. Now when I tell him he is going into time out, he may cry and scream "NO" but he does stay where i put him (and I have put him in timeout everywhere -- even in the middle of the floor in Target).
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Posted 8/21/12 1:11 PM |
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