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Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

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MamaNDaddyof3
:)

Member since 5/05

7267 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

So I'm about to take DD and my nephews to the pool and the little girl down the block calls to play So I invite her to come with us.... So the father gets on the phone and asks where we are going and then tells me that him and his son will come too.
now I find this uncomfortable.... We are not friends and his wife is at work and so is my dh. So it's not like we were all going
Am I wrong?

Posted 7/7/14 3:19 PM
 
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olive98
LIF Adolescent

Member since 11/12

791 total posts

Name:

Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

How old is the little girl. I wouldn't let my child go to the pool alone with a neighbor. He probably wants to keep an eye on her.

Posted 7/7/14 3:23 PM
 

Sonervous
LIF Infant

Member since 1/13

184 total posts

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Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

I really don't find that weird.. I would just take it as he will go to the pool too so the kids can play together. Is this a community pool? He's probably afraid his wife will kill him if he lets her go to the pool with someone they aren't really friends with.

Posted 7/7/14 3:24 PM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

54921 total posts

Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

I don't really find it odd. Maybe he isn't comfortable with his DD going to the pool with another adult. Maybe he wants to go to supervise. I know I wouldn't let DD go to the pool without me. No offense to you, as I am sure you are super responsible, but when it comes to a body of water, the more sets of eyes the better.

Posted 7/7/14 3:24 PM
 

GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!

Member since 11/06

26792 total posts

Name:
Shawn

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

There's a community pool, and your neighbor is going to take his kids to the same community pool as you at the same time as you? I don't see any problems. I think it's a nice idea so the kids can play together.

Posted 7/7/14 3:25 PM
 

Lauren82
LIF Adult

Member since 10/06

4580 total posts

Name:
L

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

I don't think it's that strange. Maybe he was nervous about sending his daughter so he decided to come also so she could still go and play with her friend? I'm not sure her age, but I wouldn't be comfortable letting my 7 year old go swimming with someone unless I knew them well. I wouldn't think too much into it...I've gone to play dates at my daughter's friends' houses and the dads have been home. I'm actually better friends with some of the dads now!

Posted 7/7/14 3:26 PM
 

Aries14
Can't plan life...

Member since 8/08

2860 total posts

Name:

Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

no - not weird. My DH would totally do this and just plan to hang with the son there while our DD played with her friends.

Posted 7/7/14 3:26 PM
 

KevinNKristin8-15-08
Welcome to the world Chase

Member since 9/08

6162 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

Posted by NervousNell

I don't really find it odd. Maybe he isn't comfortable with his DD going to the pool with another adult. Maybe he wants to go to supervise. I know I wouldn't let DD go to the pool without me. No offense to you, as I am sure you are super responsible, but when it comes to a body of water, the more sets of eyes the better.

I agree. I wouldn't let my dd go anywhere alone even birthday parties.

Posted 7/7/14 3:26 PM
 

LiveandLearn
LIF Adult

Member since 4/10

1586 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

I don't find it weird. He may not want you to feel responsible or may not feel comfortable with you taking his DD to the pool. It may just think it would be fun for his DS to go too.

Would you think it was weird if the wife did the same thing?

Posted 7/7/14 3:31 PM
 

peanutbutter2
Carpe diem!

Member since 11/10

5287 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

I don't see anything wrong here.

His daughter and son want to go to the community pool, and he is going to watch them.

Posted 7/7/14 3:43 PM
 

stinger
LIF Adult

Member since 11/11

4971 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

I can see what you mean about him being a male but I wouldn't take it that way esp as others said its a public place. Times are different I've gotten used to lots of dads being the primary parent for play dates etc.

Posted 7/7/14 3:50 PM
 

NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..

Member since 11/09

54921 total posts

Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

Posted by stinger

I can see what you mean about him being a male but I wouldn't take it that way esp as others said its a public place. Times are different I've gotten used to lots of dads being the primary parent for play dates etc.



This. My DH is pretty much a SAHD. He takes DD a lot of places where it's mostly women/moms. It's how it is.
Plus I have more male friends than female anyway, so I'd probably be happy to not have to hang out with a catty woman and get to hang out with a cool dad!
Chat Icon
I have a lot more in common with men than women anyway!

Posted 7/7/14 3:53 PM
 

MorningCuppaCoffee
Tired!

Member since 12/07

16353 total posts

Name:
Allison

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

Not strange at all.

Posted 7/7/14 3:54 PM
 

PearlJamChick
No one sings like you anymore.

Member since 7/10

9264 total posts

Name:
Petticoated Swashbuckler

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

Posted by GoldenRod

There's a community pool, and your neighbor is going to take his kids to the same community pool as you at the same time as you? I don't see any problems. I think it's a nice idea so the kids can play together.



Completely agree!

Posted 7/7/14 3:55 PM
 

Lillykat
going along for the ride...

Member since 5/05

16253 total posts

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Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

Most parents I know would want to supervise at a pool, private or public. Not sure the child's age but I would not be surprised esp if it is the dad who is the caretaker. Also if it is just him then he would probably need to bring his other child.

Posted 7/7/14 4:16 PM
 

MamaNDaddyof3
:)

Member since 5/05

7267 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

you have to have a pass to go to this pool which they do not have

he leaves her at my house all the time to play..... they even send their son over also

I just find it weird that he would invite himself to hang out with us
he said we will come also it will be a fun time
I get what a lot of people are saying that they want to supervise but I don't want to hang out with him lol (I don't know him that well)
I would never just tell another parent
hey Im gonna come and bring my other kids too

Posted 7/7/14 4:53 PM
 

readyfor3
LIF Adolescent

Member since 11/10

751 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

Posted by olive98

How old is the little girl. I wouldn't let my child go to the pool alone with a neighbor. He probably wants to keep an eye on her.




This

Posted 7/7/14 5:35 PM
 

Sparrow
LIF Adult

Member since 11/10

6826 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

Posted by MamaNDaddyof3

you have to have a pass to go to this pool which they do not have

he leaves her at my house all the time to play..... they even send their son over also

I just find it weird that he would invite himself to hang out with us
he said we will come also it will be a fun time
I get what a lot of people are saying that they want to supervise but I don't want to hang out with him lol (I don't know him that well)
I would never just tell another parent
hey Im gonna come and bring my other kids too



Yeah, that's sorta weird since they don't have a pass to this pool. I could see him ASKING if they could tag along (still ballsy though), especially since many parents wouldn't want their child at a pool without them. It does sound a little odd though given the other details you added.

Posted 7/7/14 5:37 PM
 

tourist

Member since 5/05

10425 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

It may also be that his doesn't want to send his daughter, but not his son & doesn't want you to take a 2nd kid.

Also--even though he lets his kids hang out at your house, some people are extra cautious when it comes to water.

Do you have to pay to have them as guests?

Posted 7/7/14 6:08 PM
 

starlitdragon
Me and my love

Member since 3/13

1301 total posts

Name:

Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

I'm so used to hanging out with SAHD's that this wouldn't phase me at all.

Posted 7/7/14 6:15 PM
 

MamaNDaddyof3
:)

Member since 5/05

7267 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

the thing I like most about this site is that all people have different opinions on situations

personally I just wanted to spend time with the kids not "hanging out or entertaining another adult" especially since we are not BFFs lol
I didn't feel like making awkward conversation while in my bathing suit etc

I appreciate everybodys feedback though

Posted 7/7/14 6:48 PM
 

mrsboss
my little love

Member since 12/09

5054 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

Posted by MamaNDaddyof3

the thing I like most about this site is that all people have different opinions on situations

personally I just wanted to spend time with the kids not "hanging out or entertaining another adult" especially since we are not BFFs lol
I didn't feel like making awkward conversation while in my bathing suit etc

I appreciate everybodys feedback though


I def get what you're saying, so yeah I think it's a little forward.

Posted 7/7/14 6:55 PM
 

Ayne11
Yep

Member since 1/09

18021 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

He's being a parent. If he didn't go now that would be weird.

Posted 7/7/14 7:03 PM
 

Lillykat
going along for the ride...

Member since 5/05

16253 total posts

Name:

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

Posted by MamaNDaddyof3

you have to have a pass to go to this pool which they do not have

he leaves her at my house all the time to play..... they even send their son over also

I just find it weird that he would invite himself to hang out with us
he said we will come also it will be a fun time
I get what a lot of people are saying that they want to supervise but I don't want to hang out with him lol (I don't know him that well)
I would never just tell another parent
hey Im gonna come and bring my other kids too



I understand what you are saying ...but I think it is very different having a child over to your house without the parents versus going to a pool where you are watching your child and theirs. And no offense to you but some parents are more watchful around water than others. How old is this child? I don't remember you mentioning it. Is she an amazing swimmer? Do you get in with them? I don't think the pass thing is an issue depending on the circumstances. Did he pay for himself and the kids to enter as guests or did he come along and expect you to pay? I would leave my child at a friends home but would expect to come if they are going to a pool. We bring people to our village pool and the parents often bring their siblings, but they pay. I can definitely understand the uncomfortableness you mentioned, but I can also see why a father might come and bring a sibling too. Many parents have trouble watching the 2-4 kids of their own at a pool never mind a playmate as well.

Etd to add I would decline in that situation but was just trying to offer why the situation might have presented as it did.

Message edited 7/7/2014 7:18:45 PM.

Posted 7/7/14 7:16 PM
 

Maybe-Baybe
My Sunshine

Member since 7/12

3415 total posts

Name:
My only Sunshine

Re: Do you find this weird/uncomfortable ?

I don't think it's weird per say, but yes, I would be a little uncomfortable given the details of the situation.

Posted 7/7/14 7:31 PM
 
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