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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
I was on a line today and saw a man behind me in his 70s. He had a walker and I could see he seems to be struggling with his leg and just standing there. When I was called next in line, I offered for him to go next and he nastily said, "why would I do that? you go." It was in a nasty tone. So I guess he felt insulted that I wanted to let him go in front of me. I guess I should think twice next time. 
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Posted 9/5/12 8:41 PM  |
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newbie00
LIF Adult
Member since 3/11 1191 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
Posted by Sunny10
I was on a line today and saw a man behind me in his 70s. He had a walker and I could see he seems to be struggling with his leg and just standing there. When I was called next in line, I offered for him to go next and he nastily said, "why would I do that? you go." It was in a nasty tone. So I guess he felt insulted that I wanted to let him go in front of me. I guess I should think twice next time.
Yikes.....I'm very paranoid that someone will snap at me like that if I offer, so I usually don't unless they have a few items and I have a lot.
I don't like offending people.
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| Posted 9/5/12 8:44 PM |
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SummerMom
Now a mom of 2!
Member since 6/07 4970 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
When I was pregnant or with my newborn and people let me go in front of them, I was always very appreciative. So I guess it depends on the person and the circumstance.
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| Posted 9/5/12 8:46 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
Posted by newbie00
Posted by Sunny10
I was on a line today and saw a man behind me in his 70s. He had a walker and I could see he seems to be struggling with his leg and just standing there. When I was called next in line, I offered for him to go next and he nastily said, "why would I do that? you go." It was in a nasty tone. So I guess he felt insulted that I wanted to let him go in front of me. I guess I should think twice next time.
Yikes.....I'm very paranoid that someone will snap at me like that if I offer, so I usually don't unless they have a few items and I have a lot.
I don't like offending people.
I thought about this for a few seconds before I offered. I don't think I will be doing this ever again. Nothing like someone snapping at you for doing something nice, but I understand the other side of it.
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| Posted 9/5/12 8:47 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
Posted by SummerMom
When I was pregnant or with my newborn and people let me go in front of them, I was always very appreciative. So I guess it depends on the person and the circumstance.
Yes, I think it depends on who it is, but after today, since you never know who will be appreciative or snap at you, I think I am best to not offer again.
Message edited 9/5/2012 8:48:59 PM.
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| Posted 9/5/12 8:48 PM |
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SummerMom
Now a mom of 2!
Member since 6/07 4970 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
Posted by Sunny10
Posted by SummerMom
When I was pregnant or with my newborn and people let me go in front of them, I was always very appreciative. So I guess it depends on the person and the circumstance.
Yes, I think it depends on who it is, but after today, since you never know who will be appreciative or snap at you, I think I am best to not offer again.
Yeah, and I wouldn't offer assistance to a lady with a belly unless I was reaaaaalllly sure she was pregnant. 
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| Posted 9/5/12 11:15 PM |
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PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken
Member since 6/11 9145 total posts
Name:
Phyllis
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
Maybe he is very old school and felt embarrassed because you should be going before him (ladies first)
A lot of older/handicapped people would normally be very grateful - don't let this one man deter you from being thoughtful to others in this situation.
I always help older/handicapped people when I am out. I always wonder about those who don't. How could you not?
I recently saw an older lady struggling to put her packages into her trunk at S&S. I stopped what I was doing and loaded it up for her. She was very grateful and so was I - Grateful I was able to help someone else and that I had the ability to do so.
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| Posted 9/6/12 11:01 AM |
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Waste06
Waste not, want not
Member since 6/06 7219 total posts
Name:
Lois Mom Mommy Mama Ma
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
Sure. Especially if they are struggling or only have a few items.
He sounded like a grump. It wouldn't deter me from doing it again in the future though.
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| Posted 9/6/12 11:08 AM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
I generally will strike up a conversation first. If they are unresponsive or cold. Well then screw 'em they can wait. If they seem like a kind person, then yes, I'll even tell them "you can go ahead of me".
Plus, I have a lot of handicap family members. They may look as if they are seriously struggling but to them its just part of life and no trouble at all. They aren't looking for pity or attention. They are just average like you and me, just in a different way. I can see it in their eyes. So even tho I may strike up a conversation, I may not let them in front, but wish them a pleasant day, etc. Sometimes a kind word goes a long way, especially when it comes from genuine social/civil kindness and not from pity or gratefulness that you aren't handicapped. My cousin HATES this, says girls will talk to him because they are glad its not them with CP, guys too. They never say it, but he says he can 'feel' it. He knows the difference between a kind person who's just kind vs a pity party. For the record he doesn't have CP. People will often talk to him as if he does or ask him about it, he is twisted and crippled due to abuse. When people mistake it for CP, its a reminder to him. He taught me a lot. We were a gang of misfits LOL.
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| Posted 9/6/12 11:13 AM |
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jerseypanda
Life is good.
Member since 1/07 9164 total posts
Name:
Amanda
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
I wouldn't let this one man deter you from offering again next time.
I find that in the law of averages, you will encounter more people who will appreciate the gesture than those who will give you attitude for it. I'm not going to stop being a good person because a handful of people take it the wrong way. That was very nice of you!
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| Posted 9/6/12 11:53 AM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
I do. If they snap at me, it's thier problem. I'm grateful I can stand in line and don't mind giving up my spot.
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| Posted 9/6/12 12:01 PM |
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Sunny10
LIF Adult
Member since 10/10 1287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
Posted by Xelindrya
I generally will strike up a conversation first. If they are unresponsive or cold. Well then screw 'em they can wait. If they seem like a kind person, then yes, I'll even tell them "you can go ahead of me".
Plus, I have a lot of handicap family members. They may look as if they are seriously struggling but to them its just part of life and no trouble at all. They aren't looking for pity or attention. They are just average like you and me, just in a different way. I can see it in their eyes. So even tho I may strike up a conversation, I may not let them in front, but wish them a pleasant day, etc. Sometimes a kind word goes a long way, especially when it comes from genuine social/civil kindness and not from pity or gratefulness that you aren't handicapped. My cousin HATES this, says girls will talk to him because they are glad its not them with CP, guys too. They never say it, but he says he can 'feel' it. He knows the difference between a kind person who's just kind vs a pity party. For the record he doesn't have CP. People will often talk to him as if he does or ask him about it, he is twisted and crippled due to abuse. When people mistake it for CP, its a reminder to him. He taught me a lot. We were a gang of misfits LOL.
While I appreciate this, I didn't do this over pity for this person or grateful that I am not in this person's shoes. It was a pure genuine gesture that because of the wait and line being long, this person wouldn't have to stand as long. He was my parents' age and I knew I would appreciate anyone who went out of their way for my parents.
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| Posted 9/6/12 12:01 PM |
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PhyllisNJoe
My Box Is Broken
Member since 6/11 9145 total posts
Name:
Phyllis
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Re: Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
Posted by Sunny10
Posted by Xelindrya
I generally will strike up a conversation first. If they are unresponsive or cold. Well then screw 'em they can wait. If they seem like a kind person, then yes, I'll even tell them "you can go ahead of me".
Plus, I have a lot of handicap family members. They may look as if they are seriously struggling but to them its just part of life and no trouble at all. They aren't looking for pity or attention. They are just average like you and me, just in a different way. I can see it in their eyes. So even tho I may strike up a conversation, I may not let them in front, but wish them a pleasant day, etc. Sometimes a kind word goes a long way, especially when it comes from genuine social/civil kindness and not from pity or gratefulness that you aren't handicapped. My cousin HATES this, says girls will talk to him because they are glad its not them with CP, guys too. They never say it, but he says he can 'feel' it. He knows the difference between a kind person who's just kind vs a pity party. For the record he doesn't have CP. People will often talk to him as if he does or ask him about it, he is twisted and crippled due to abuse. When people mistake it for CP, its a reminder to him. He taught me a lot. We were a gang of misfits LOL.
While I appreciate this, I didn't do this over pity for this person or grateful that I am not in this person's shoes. It was a pure genuine gesture that because of the wait and line being long, this person wouldn't have to stand as long. He was my parents' age and I knew I would appreciate anyone who went out of their way for my parents.
I feel the same. I always hope that someone is just as kind to my mom if she is in need of help while she's out and about.
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| Posted 9/6/12 12:11 PM |
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Xelindrya
Mommy's little YouTube Star!
Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
Name:
Veronica
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Do you let people go in front of you on a line that seem to have a handicap?
Spin off.. do you hold off getting in line in FRONT of a handicapped or disabled person? I find that I need to tie my shoe, or got distracted at *just* the right time. So they are generally in front and not behind me.
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| Posted 9/6/12 12:45 PM |
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