Does this sound a little ridiculous?

I am not sure who I am really more angry with-DH or his parents.

DD's christening is coming up in two weeks and IL's are coming in from Poland for it. MIL has made it be known that despite the fact that we don't have the room to host them, she wants to stay with us. We don't have an extra room, nor do we even have a pull out couch. FIL is permanently disabled so we can't stick them on an ait mattress (DH doesn't think that we should give up our bed because DD is still in her cosleeper in our room and I am still nursing her)

So what do you think DH wants to do?

How about get my cousin to help him move a queen sized futon from my parents basement to our cramped living room and then bring it back to my parents house after IL's leave?

Even better, my parents offered for my IL's to stay in their totally private basement (with a full bathroom and private entrance) but DH (or MIL) wants IL's in our living room for a week.

My IL's are not bad people but I already had words with MIL when she was here in the fall (she basically ripped me a new one and I was too polite to say anything back) and DH and his mother argue ALL the time.

I wish I could get them to stay somewhere other than my living room. I can't spend a week with MIL and take care of my daughter. I will either end up hurting MIL or going to sleep at my parents' house with DD (which would start a huge fight that I am taking the baby away from them)

Sorry for the long vent. I have been keeping this inside too long and they are coming June 7th.

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

it does sound ridiculous, BUT I can also see that they probably want to be around the baby since they live overseas and their visits are probably few and far between.

MAYBE you'll get lucky and they'll see how inconvenient it is and change their minds mid-trip???

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

Totally ridiculous and I would not be happy either. They should stay with your gracious parents. Explain that they come come over every day and see the baby, but it is just not good for everyone to be in the same place like that. I'd explain that you are still nursing and it is often more comforatble for you to nurse in the living room on the couch and you'd apprecaite it if everyone respected your privacy and your routine.

I feel your pain. My MIL and FIL came and stayed with us when Molly was born and MIL didn't lift a finger. She even slept in the first morning home when she heard me in the kitchen up with Jack at 6am. You'd think she'd get up and say "I'll take care of this, you get some rest." Nope! She also sat around and watched her soaps and didn't cook a single meal.
AHH!! Sorry for getting off topic and venting, but I wish I would've been more forceful in insisting they not stay with us!

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

So sorry. I don't even want my parents in our living room on the pull out couch when they come next month and the couch folds back up after use. I hope it all works out and you have a nice visit. Just keep telling yourself "its only for a week".

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

She probably just wants to stay there to see the baby. I feel your pain though my DH isn't even talking to his mother right now because she is mad at us because we didn't ask her to babysit for a wedding we just recently went to. UGHH!!!

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

Posted by SkyzTheLimit

She probably just wants to stay there to see the baby. I feel your pain though my DH isn't even talking to his mother right now because she is mad at us because we didn't ask her to babysit for a wedding we just recently went to. UGHH!!!

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

Maybe after a night on the futon they will change their mind.

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

I don't understand people wantign to stay with you when there is clearly NO ROOM. My brother and his family do this when they come visit. I suggested once they might be more comfortable at a hotel, and we got into a huge fight about how you'make room for family'. So now when they visit, they stay with us out of spite it seems, like " see, we can all fit', when in reality, they really can't and their kids are up until 10 or 11 pm.
I get that they want to see the baby, but come over in the morning and leave later at night. WHY would they want to inconvience you ? There is no way I'd let my DH drag a futon in my living room for a week. What a nightmare.
Hopefully it goes quickly, be thankful they are not more frequent visitors.

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

I want to propose to DH that his parents try sleeping on the futon while it is still in my parents' basement and if FIL is not comfortable (he is disabled with severe back injuries) then they can go to hotel. Why move something to our house if it might not work out?

I was just looking around my living room trying to imagine how it will fit,

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

I don't know - I guess I'm in the minority here, but I would just deal with it. The fact is, your IL's aren't coming to visit your parents, they are excited to see their new grandchild and spend time with their son and DIL. They probably feel uncomfortable spending the night at your parents, and I honestly can't say I blame them.

They don't visit that often and are super-excited - I would just deal with it.
The last time my brother, SIL and their 3 kids visited, hubby ended up sleeping on the couch, and I slept on an air mattress in the living room. Did it stink? Heck, yeah!! I feel like for family, you just deal with it.

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

Posted by Juliet

Posted by SkyzTheLimit

She probably just wants to stay there to see the baby. I feel your pain though my DH isn't even talking to his mother right now because she is mad at us because we didn't ask her to babysit for a wedding we just recently went to. UGHH!!!

I have no problem with them coming over and spending their days here, but I really think it is better for them to sleep somewhere other than my living room.

It's so tough because DH and I spend a lot of time with my parents because they live 3 miles away and are VERY helpful to us. I feel like IL's staying with us is like payback for being able to see my parents so much.

Message edited 5/28/2007 2:25:38 PM.

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

Ok, I have to say, you need to put your foot down. You have a baby and a family to think of now. It is not like they have nowhere else to go. They have a wonderful offer from your parents, and they should accept the offer graciously or stay at a hotel. I think DH needs to tell them, "I'm sorry, I know you would like to stay with us and spend all your time with the baby, but it's not an option for this visit." This sounds like a mess. I can't imagine having two grown adults living ontop of us for a week. It's bad enough having a small space, but add two more people to the mix, ontop of having a baby and it's ridiculous. JMO.

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

Re: Does this sound a little ridiculous?

MY in-laws always stay with us when they visit. an they visit alot..It is hard and we do have the room for them. Once I told my dh that his brother should not stay with us (because we had other guests) and he actually suggest we pay for his hotel room! I was like, what?

Good luck. HOpe it all works out.