embarrassed by your living situation?

ok so i guess this makes me semi shallow...DH and i live in a teeny tiny 1 bedroom apt. we only have 2 rooms and a bathroom. 1 room is our bedroom which we will be sharing with DD when she comes and the other is 1/2 kitchen 1/4 office 1/4 living room.

we have tons of stuff crampped into this tiny place but it just WORKS for us! but i tend to get extremely embarrassed when people want to come up and visit.. semi because we live with my parents so i feel like they will judge us and semi because theres really no place for people to sit. i only have a tiny love seat and a kitchen table. i was hoping to be out of here before the baby comes since i know we're going to have tons of company.

i tend to invite people over when my parents are out so that i can use their living room so people never really have to see where we live. i try to keep it as clean as possible but we're so cluttered sometimes even when its ***** and span it still looks messy!!

does any one else get this or am i just being stupid!

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

do you want to move before the baby? Is there another part of their house that would suit you?

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

im sure people understand... plus they are coming to see the baby.. not how you decorated

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

Posted by butterfly20

im sure people understand... plus they are coming to see the baby.. not how you decorated

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

i have the same living situation. DH and I live in the basement apartment of my parents home in order to pay off debt and save up $. We hope to be out in a year but until then I am comfortable with our living situation. Our set up is very similar to yours. On one side of the wall is our kitchen, dining area and bathroom. On the other side is our bedroom/living room. Its all very small and looks alot smaller than yours and def. not set up as nice as yours but I am content with it.

We can only fit like 4 guests in there and its still cramped but you know what? Our living situation wasnt for us to please guests. It sucks that we cant have big gatherings down there (we use my moms place if we have get togethers) but its best for us right now. Family and friends do understand. Its not a permanent situation so don't worry too much about it.

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

I can relate to your living situation.

We just moved out of a very large 3 bedroom house (rental). We had a LR, DR, large kitchen, 3 BRs, bathroom, basement, garage... Plenty of space for the two of us, our baby and room to spare.

We are now living in my parents house. We have 2 bedrooms and a bathroom. The baby's crib will be set up next to our bed. The other bedroom is used as our living room, with a kitchen table and a mini-fridge.

Those that are close to us know why we moved out of our old place, and why we chose to move in with my parents (two different reasons btw).

I'm thankful I have the opportunity and the ability to live with my parents for a while and save money for a home that we like.

I'm I embarrassed? Absolutely not. It's a challenging transition, and we're making the best of it.

I only expect immediate family to come visit after the baby is born anyway. This is our living situation for the time being. If someone doesn't like it, then tough nuggets for them.

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

I always feel the same way. We have a 2 bdr. apt so there's a room for DC when s/he comes but our issue is storage! There are only 2 closets (one very small one in DC's room and one larger one in hallway. DH redesigned the hallway closet this weekend to maximize space which it did for clothes but everything else we had in there, luggage, etc. is now homeless. We have no storage in the living so a lot of things are out. I go thru stuff all the time trying to de-clutter but nothing ever seems to help. We finally gave in and got a storage unit which seems to be helping.


Honestly though people understand when you are married just over a year with a baby coming.

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

thanks jen and erin... i agree we choose to stay here so that we can buy something with out having to worry about "can we afford to do this" like i said im content with the way things are but i just feel sometimes people "judge" like "oh they cant even afford to live on their own and they have a baby" i know it sounds silly but noone really knows our situation except close family and like you have all say those are the only people who unerstand. and if people dont like it.. tough nuggets! thanks ladies!

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

Posted by Meggo613

thanks jen and erin... i agree we choose to stay here so that we can buy something with out having to worry about "can we afford to do this" like i said im content with the way things are but i just feel sometimes people "judge" like "oh they cant even afford to live on their own and they have a baby" i know it sounds silly but noone really knows our situation except close family and like you have all say those are the only people who unerstand. and if people dont like it.. tough nuggets! thanks ladies!

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

I have to say I have a house and I feel like you. We bought a house that needed a lot of work. We are living on the first floor which has a living room, dining room, kitchen, bathroom and a bedroom which is where we sleep right now. The basement is unfinished and a disaster and upstairs is 2 bedrooms and a bathroom. I hoped that the 2 bedrooms would be done by the time the baby is born but I am really beginning to doubt it! My dh hates contractors b/c they never do things completely right and he says he can do all the things himself, the problem is he works and doesn't have time to do it. Yesterday I almost cried thinking of where I will be putting all the shower gifts(it is only 2&1/2 months away). I still have bridal shower stuff not put away yet b/c I have no closets or storage not to mention MIL wants to buy the baby everything and anything(including a humungous carousel horse). I have a feeling the baby will be in the pack n play in the downstairs bedroom squished with us for a long time....sorry for my rant but I know how you feel.

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

thank you so much for all the replies ladies im glad to not feel alone in this situation!! and your right jen about it being really hard to live here which is why we are leaving! and i just feel its such a waste to move now to a bigger apartment just to move again in dec. when we coudl very easily stay here an save all that extra $$

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

There's no shame in that. I don't know anyone who just woke up one day in a big house of their own.
DH and I lived with my parents for about a year before we bought our house. We lived in my childhood bedroom and shared everything with them.

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

we have a 2br apt, so baby has his own [cramped]room (with a loveseat in there, bc we have no other place for it! hahaha)

Our kitchen and living room are really small though - no kitchen table (only an island with stools), only 1 couch and some ottomans in the LR with no room for additional seating, so i feel you!!

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

None of us are where we want to be at any given time.

I'm horrified by my kitchen and main bathroom, unfortunantly every visitor sees my kitchen and probably a third see the bathroom.

One day they'll look better and I'll be embarrassed by another part of my place or my wrinkles or my weight.

Just have to let it go

Message edited 5/27/2009 5:21:45 PM.

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

I think that most people our age are in the same situation. How are you suppose to automatically come up with the 20% to put down on such a high price item! With saying that, I think most people understand. I would never mind sitting on a bed or a bench or the floor for that matter if it was someone I cared enough about to go see their child!!

Could you ask your parents to use their living room while you have company? Just to make yourself feel more roomy!

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

Message edited 5/27/2009 5:17:05 PM.

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

I have the same situation. We have a one bedroom house with a bathroom, LR, Kitchen and breakfast area.

I do get embarassed sometimes.. but, like you said, it works for us. Don't worry what others think. It's your life, not thiers. But, i do get it. It sucks sometimes.

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

I know how you feel -- it seems like our friends live in these HUGE houses and we live in a "cute" 2 bdroom bungelow. We love it, but it's a little outside of town and it's cramped when we have more than ~6 people over.

Just remember that they are there to see and love on your baby -- they could care less about your house

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

I can completely understand! We live in a 2br apartment. This place embarrasses me for many reasons (which I don't even want to share becasue it's THAT embarrasing to me ) & it was only recently that I got some decent living room furniture. Before that, I didn't even like my parents coming by. In July we are moving to a somewhat nicer place, but it's still a 2br & we now have two kids. I feel embarrassed still sometimes that we can't have a bigger place right now. I want a house more than anything, but it's still going to be a few years.

I try to remind myself that we are our own biggest critics. I realize that people probably don't judge our living situation even near as harshly as I do. Long Island is not cheap & it is incredibly difficult for young families to make it here on our own. I wish we could live with our parents- I'd love to save the cash & be closer to my own home. As you can tell by this thread, you are certainly not alone in how you feel. Just try to focus on the fact that you are providing your baby with a home & tons of love- don't worry about the size of the home. You will be where you want to be soon enough!

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

Re: embarrassed by your living situation?

thanks so much girls for all the love! im glad to know im not alone!!!