Ever feel so hopeless?

DH and I are struggling financially. I really need to find employment but I have no sitter for my baby DS and no one to get my older DS to and from school. No family to help and whatever little I would make from a job would go to before/after care and day care and Not to paying the bills like we need it to. It would put us in a bigger hole. Our car needs more work. Major work and we can not afford it. Now DH called and they had a meeting at work. Their health insurance went up again and are going to take more out his check. So much that its really going to hurt us. We barely make it with food shopping as it is and now with less.

Idk what to do, I have an asthmatic son and a toddler. They both need health insurance but we can not afford to keep it anymore. I just want to curl up on the couch and cry. I hate this life.

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

i am sorry you guys are going thru this have you considered babysitting from your home to make extra money?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

I just wanted to give you some

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

If you are in NY check out Child Health Plus health insurance from the state for your kids. Can you get a part time job on the weekends or evenings when your DH is home from work? Do you clip coupons? What does your budget look like? Are there things like Netflix you could cut out of the budget?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Posted by blu6385

i am sorry you guys are going thru this have you considered babysitting from your home to make extra money?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now, but know it will get better. Everything always seems to work itself out.

See where you can make cuts.
- Cable: Go to basic
- Cell Phones: Basic
- No luxury items AT ALL until you get
back on your feet.
- Lower the heat just a lil bit and wear
warmer clothes around the house
to lower heating bills
- Clip Coupons for grocery shopping
and buy only sale items.
Pasta can go a LONG WAY.

I remember as a child my parents had 4 kids, my mother worked full time days and my father worked full time nights just to scrape by. We had a lot of Macaroni with beans, Macaroni with squash, macaroni with broccoli... We had Breakfast for dinner a lot. Pancakes aren't expensive to make. We'd go months like that and then they'd catch up. When my father got sick and couldn't work anymore, it got even harder, but my mother somehow did it. She worked VERY hard but made it happen for all of us. Did we have everything we WANTED? no. But we had all we needed and it helped us become more aware adults. I don't take anything for granted.

Keep your head up. Everyone feels down sometimes and you have every right to. Cry, get it out. Scream. Do what you must, but just know you will find a way out of this.

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

i am so sorry

You definitely can not get rid of the health insurance. Try to cut corners elsewhere...the pp listed some great options.
do you rent? is it possible to move somewhere that may be a little less expensive? and may also save money on dh commute?
Are you collecting unemployment? If not, look for a weekend job so that Dh can stay with the kids while you work. even if its jsut weekend help at the mall its better than nothing.
dont give up on a full time job though, i dont know what field you are in, but keep searching. you may find a job that pays enough for you to put your kids in daycare and still come home with some extra cash each month.

Message edited 1/10/2012 10:39:40 AM.

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Thank you for the tips.

We live pretty basic. Basic cable, one cell that's prepaid which cost $10 a month (which because of the car messing up all the time we need), we live in a apartment complex so we dont pay for heat or water (thank God).

I just started with clipping coupons and it helps.

I will look into CHP but I don't know if we can get any assistance since DH job offers health insurance. We just want the boys covered. We could care less about us for now. We rarely go to the dr now as it is.

We can not move.

DH works Saturday so I could get a job on Sunday only during the weekend. Thankfully we live less than 5 minutes away from DH job so he walks to work. That is such a blessing.

Message edited 1/10/2012 10:45:04 AM.

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Have you tried looking into Child Health Plus...(I think thats what its called). It's so much cheaper than traditional health insurance and I think they even have a family plan. Many hugs and prayers that things turn around for you soon

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

You may qualify for food stamps. Check it out.

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

ive felt the same way in the past.

what worked best for us and made us feel better was writing down EVERY bill we had. and then ones that were loans we wrote down the date they were going to be paid off. we then wrote down misc. expenses (gas, grocerys, things like coffee, etc....)

we saw places that we were wasting money (who knew coffee adds up so fast!). it was also a big relief when we realized that in 3 years our car would be paid off, 4 years one of my student loans would be paid off, etc... it gave us HOPE! that in a couple years we would have less bills. it can be overwhelming when you think about all the bills you have but when you actually see when they will be paid off it lessens your anxiety.

but have you also tried selling things you dont use anymore? people will buy ANYTHING on craigslist, even broken things. i sold a broken air conditioner for $15 once lol the guy was selling it for scrap metal

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Just praying for you and your family. I grew up watching my parents struggle like that and I know how it's just one thing after another. I really hope something comes through for you soon.

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Thinking of you during this time.

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

You should definitely apply for public assistance. That's what its there for. have you considered watching a baby or another child? I'm sure there are many out there looking for responsible child care. A teacher's child would be great, same schedule, summers off etc. How about working at a restaurant at night? You can probably find a job that you will just need care for an hour for your kids until your DH comes home. Good luck

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

So sorry to hear about this. I would definitely try and babysit from home. This is often a cash payment and could be a nice amount of additional money. I'd also work Sunday if DH is home then. Try Starbucks, Costco or Home Depot. They all pay pretty well.
I know you said moving is not an option, but Long Island is so expensive. Could DH see if there is job availability somewhere with a lower cost of living?

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

cancel cable, if you need to watch something I will literally burn stuff for you and mail it.

Babysit if you can, you can try to start up your own business but there are childcare places out there that work for low income families.

My SIL lived on pasta growing up bc it's all they could afford.

Check out Child Healthcare + and Foodstamps, you may qualify. And if you can work on a Sunday, it's a few more dollars in your pocket.

What are your DH's hours? It may suck but you could always get a night position, it's what my stepmom did. She worked nights, dad worked days. It sucks but you pull through.

Message edited 1/10/2012 1:10:01 PM.

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

I feel ya :hugs:

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

DH has health insurance through his job and we still qualify for CHP. We pay an arm and a leg for health insurance that hardly covers anything through his job for just the two of us that we would def not be able to swing having DS on as well. Thank goodness for CHP. You are able to pick plans that work with the doctors you already have. CHP gives you a list of plans they have then I called up the ped with the list and they told me which ones they took. Just make sure you do that before you pick a plan if you really want to stay with your ped and other doctors.

Re: Ever feel so hopeless?

There is some great advice on this thread. Just wanted to send you some hugs and prayers Please hang in there and take it one day at a time