How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

And how old were they at the time?

Jack is 27 months, goes to nursery school Tues and Thurs from 9:15-11:15. He is having a hard time adjusting. He cries on and off the entire time. It's breaking my heart to the point where I don't want to leave him there.

I know this is fairly common (at least that's what the owners are telling me) but would love to know some other experiences.

Jack is soooooo fine on playdates - he could care less if I'm there. Gymboree he was very independent as well. I thought this would be right up his alley.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

4 classes...He was 25 months when we started.

The first two I stayed in the class , but away from him the entire time.

3rd session I left with 15 minutes left.

4th session I left 15 minutes into the class.

He was 100% fine after that, he runs in there now.

Every kid is different though. This is from a kid who had SEVERE seperation anxiety issues a year ago....Seems like thier personalities and attachements can /grow/leave so quickly.

Can you try a gradual seperation?

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

DS was 2.5 when he started and went from 9:30-12 2 days a week. It took a month before he stopped crying.
He will stop. Don't linger because it makes it harder for both you, him and the teachers (they can't distract him).

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

We are going through this now.. Maddie will be 3 end of October and is having a hard time- last week she was fine Monday, and then the fit hit the shan on Wednesday when she cried on and off the whole class.

Friday I went with her a little and then left- and she was miserable.

Yesterday I stayed w/ her the whole time and didn't really interact w/ her that much- I'll do the same thing tomrorow and try to separate for a while- we'll see how she does.

Some kids just take longer to adjust than otyhers.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

DS is 28 months and been in daycare since he was 6 months old----still cries at drop off!!!!

But then he is fine...I would keep sending him. Taking him out will only make it worse as he gets older IMO

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

ummm, 2 years and counting

Breaks my heart everytime.

It doesn't happen every morning anymore but my son certainly knows exactly how to pull at my haert strings and some mornings I just think he does it out of habit.

Like "wait, mom's leaving. I guess I should make a fuss, wah wah. OK, she's turning around and coming back for me, ok, i better give her a big hug and kiss so she doesn't leave. Oh no, she's leaving again, if I cry she'll come back and give me more kisses, wah wah, oh no, she's leaving again, i better cry louder cause it looks like she's not coming back, she's gone. Why am i crying again? let me go play with this cool puzzle".

And then it is all forgotton.

He still needs to get used to being without you. And you're doing it very gradually which is a great thing. He's going to be absolutely fine. And so will you

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

DD is 3. we did a week long camp at her school a few wks before school to help with the adjustment, She cried every day(it was 4 days long) she also cried the 1st day of school. 5 classes total. Now she walks in with a smile. The owner of her school did tell me that some children take up to a month though. hang in there - he will learn to love it, I promise.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

Kaitlyn started last week. They have an "exit" strategy at ours where the parents shadow the 1st week, then the second they slowly move the parents out to the hallway/behind the mirror- and hopefully by the third week we only stay a little while and then leave the building.

Honestly DD could care less that I am there for the most part. She stays with me for about 3 mins then wants nothing to do with me. I have caught her looking once or twice at the parents corner to see if I'm there but she didn't look upset or anything. She is the youngest in her class (they have me put her in the older class since she was border of the two classes). Most of the kid she is with are Dec-April kids. There are a few who are coming over to their parents and looking for them - but most are taking it in stride. So there will be some parents who can leave sooner than others. There are a few who are there with their nannies so I think separation might be easier for some of them.

Each child is different and some take longer to warm up than others do. I think playdates are had to judge if they will separate well unless you are used to leaving them at other's homes. With mommy and me classes etc they know you are there and not leaving them even if they don't want anything to do with you.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

It's so hard to say-DD started daycare when she was just 2.5 months so there was not adjustment really, she's been going her whole life.

I think it is tougher for toddlers. I know DD moved classrooms at 2 it was tough and took 2 or 3 days for her to be comfortable again.

This is one of the reasons I am only taking her to part time when I am home on maternity leave-I don't want to have to go through the adjustment again when she eventually goes back.

It will get better, I would keep sending him

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

awww poor baby.


Well the first time AJ was 3months old. So it took less than a week.

The second time AJ was 10months old. This was a little harder. She's been there almost two months now and she will still sometimes cry when we try to pass her over. But she's sooo much better than the first 3weeks.

Good Luck!

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

DD started 9/8 at 21 months. Day 1 was a total nightmare, screaming at the top of her lungs, no nap, screamed in the car on the way home from exhaustion, didn't sleep at night either. Day 2 she cried when DH went to leave, AND took a nap. Day 3 when DH said he was going to work she said NO, but didn't cry, and took a nap. Day 4 she smiled at the teacher, said hello and gave DH a kiss good-bye, and took a nap.

So, I guess it took a week.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

D,

We're still waiting for Caden to adjust. He sounds so much like Jack...could careless if Im there or not at playdates etc....

After leaving him screaming on Monday I called my girlfriend for a shoulder to cry on I was so upset...

I picked him up and saw him playing on the playground I immediately felt better. He was fine for the most part they said. They told me it could take another week or 2 but he'll adjust.



PS. He has the same type of school schedule that Jack has 2 days per week, 2.5 hours per day.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

Justin had his first day of school the other day and was the only kid crying in the class. I felt horrible.

If it continues and he doesn't stop I'm not gonna send him. I'll give him a couple of weeks, but he is only 2 1/2 and I'm not going to push it. If he's not having fun what's the point.

I feel like I leave everyday for work and have him scream and cry for me I'm not going to do it if I don't have to. I was all for it until I brought him the other day and heard him scream the entire time and when I went to get him at the end he was bright red and trying to catch his breathe he had been crying so much. He looked SOOO sad when the other mothers walked in before me like I wasn't going to come get him.

That being said the other kids seemed to have a great time lol

Some of the other moms said it took about 3-4 classes to completely adjust for their kids.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

Thanks everyone! I'm def. going to give it more time and pray that it gets better. I just hate leaving him like that, and knowing that he gets upset throughout the time there.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

DD started nursery school on Monday - 2.5 hours a day every day. Yesterday she was crying on and off the entire time. All the parents waited outside after 15- 20 mintues of settling them in - but I could hear my daughter she just couldn't see me. Today was her second day and the session also lasted an hour - to my surprise the teacher got the kids to play with instruments and they all came out smiling and happy - none of them were crying.
Initially she was but i found its been easier to hang out 15-20 mintues and then leave. The longer I stay the more worked up she gets.

Good luck its not easy

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

It took about 3 weeks.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

at 4 months it took him 2 days. but, i imagine it would be harder as he gets older.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

I think our kids go to the same school right? Except we are in the 3 day program.

My DD will be 3 in November. She loves it...however she is mute while she's there. Just does her own thing, but rambles on and on as soon as we are out the door on the way home. She hasn't cried at all at drop off and is always happy to see me but just does her own thing there. There is one boy there who cries each morning and it makes me get a lump in my throat. But the teachers are really comforting to them and my friend brings her daughter in 15 minutes late due to work and said nobody is every crying when she gets there so they get over it quick.

I would def give him more time - it's the best thing to do for him and he is going to love it!

ETA: I didn't want to ever say "when I pick you up later" so she wouldn't think I was leaving and maybe not coming back - I would say "so later on today after school we are going to...". It will get better!

Message edited 9/22/2009 4:29:18 PM.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

I did a Gymboree seperation school this summer....2 hours once a week. She cried for 6 weeks. i thought she would never be ready for school in September.

She started last Tuesday and had minimal tears getting on the bus...no tears at school. By the time Thursday rolled around no tears at all. So I would give him some more time esp. if this is his first school experience.

ETA: Kerri is 3

Message edited 9/22/2009 7:53:00 PM.

Re: How long did it take your child to adjust to nursery school/daycare

I so feel for you on his as we are going thorugh the same thing rght now.

My DD is 3 and is going M, T, W full days. She had stopped crying when droppign her off and picking her up - but today she jsut didn't want to go and was really crying when I left - I cried myself to work

It is sooo hard to see them upset and since I work she has to go. I keep hoping she will adjust. I keep doubting myself if I made the right choice to send her.