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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
CathyB's post reminded me to post what I was thinking about off and on. How many activities do you volunteer for with DC? Does it seem like the same parents volunteer for everything?
Currently, I'm DS's Cub Scout Den leader, Asst soccer coach, and an assistant instructor in some of his karate classes.
I rarely jump at the opportunity to volunteer more time, but nobody else seems to step up, so after the first round and nobody offers, I do, since I don't want DS and the other kids to miss out.
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Posted 5/26/10 8:19 AM  |
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rojerono
Happiest.
Member since 8/06 13803 total posts
Name:
Jeannie
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
I volunteer for NOTHING.
I'm not proud of it - but I simply do not have any time to commit to any of their activities beyond showing up to as much as I can. I am usually at work by 8 and don't generally get to leave until around 7. I rarely even make it to any weekday games or activities.
Rob - on the other hand - volunteers for all school trips, goes to every in school activity and goes to every game and practice that the kids have. We don't love that he's out of work.. but it really is kind of a blessing in disguise in some ways. Even when he works, he's usually out by 4pm so he always manages to get to after school events and games. He's awesome.
And yes - it is the same parents who volunteer for everything most of the time. Sometimes I am envious of the time they are able to make - but mostly I'm just grateful that they are such wonderful people and friends and always make Robbie feel great even when I can't be there.
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| Posted 5/26/10 8:41 AM |
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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Posted by rojerono
I volunteer for NOTHING.
I'm not proud of it - but I simply do not have any time to commit to any of their activities beyond showing up to as much as I can. I am usually at work by 8 and don't generally get to leave until around 7. I rarely even make it to any weekday games or activities.
Rob - on the other hand - volunteers for all school trips, goes to every in school activity and goes to every game and practice that the kids have. We don't love that he's out of work.. but it really is kind of a blessing in disguise in some ways. Even when he works, he's usually out by 4pm so he always manages to get to after school events and games. He's awesome.
And yes - it is the same parents who volunteer for everything most of the time. Sometimes I am envious of the time they are able to make - but mostly I'm just grateful that they are such wonderful people and friends and always make Robbie feel great even when I can't be there.
But to me, that still counts as YOU volunteering. As a family, the collective "you" are volunteering. DW doesn't volunteer for stuff, but I don't see that as "not volunteering" because I cover that.
I absolutely understand that many families are super swamped with work, kids, family, etc., but a lot of parents that don't volunteer spend the entire class/activity sitting on the sidelines, so it isn't because they have no time.
I don't think less of people who don't volunteer, but sometimes I just wish other people would help out so I could volunteer for less sometimes.... I don't want DS to think that Daddy will ALWAYS be helping out with everything, and will always be assisting him. I want him to do stuff without me. (I don't help with all of his karate classes, just the Saturday ones, and I don't help with swimming, so I'm not there 100% of the time for all his activities)
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| Posted 5/26/10 8:48 AM |
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FranM
And so it goes....
Member since 9/05 2217 total posts
Name:
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
DH and I believe its important to be involved so we do what we can. I am a PTA member and Cub Scout Den Leader. Next year I will be the Committee Chair for our CS Pack and have signed up for a few PTA committees, DH is signed up to Asst. Coach soccer.
From what I have experienced so far there is a fairly large size group of parents that I see over and over again that are the "doers". I see them at PTA, scouts and on the fields.
I have also found that most parents are willing to help when a short term commitment is needed. Our PTA committees get lots of volunteers for the day of evnts. We usually have no trouble finding a CS parent to put together a specific trip/event.
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| Posted 5/26/10 9:02 AM |
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kellybean
LIF Infant
Member since 9/07 85 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
I am a team mom for both boys. I do not attend PTA meetings because they are on my late night at work. But I have been a comitte chair and I help out as much as I can. I try to be involved in everything they do. Its hard. and sometimes I am so worn out I want to scream but when I think about it they were to yesterday , today they are almost ten and eleven. I know the time is coming where they may not want me to be so involved so I do it as much as possible now. I do not get annoyed at parents who dont sign up for these th ings at all. you never know why another person cant and there are times I have to say no. I dont like it but I do have to. I wanted to add that the only time I get annoyed is with the parents who NEVER help with anything but complain the most ..ex: they come to watch the child in a game...they dont pay attention to the kid at all etc..if the coaches ask for help that day they ignore it and at the end complain the loudest about the coaches etc..that makes me crazy
Message edited 5/26/2010 9:19:22 AM.
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| Posted 5/26/10 9:16 AM |
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PatsBrat
LIF Adult
Member since 10/06 2326 total posts
Name:
Ms. Brat
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Nothing. I work full time. If there ever came an opportunity that I could work into my schedule I would jump at it, but right now it's impossible.
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| Posted 5/26/10 10:03 AM |
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mommy2bella
Where does time go?
Member since 12/05 9747 total posts
Name:
Kelly
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
I would love to be involved in the PTA and school board if I can...and I used to coach my little sisters in soccer, so I would love to do that again if my schedule allows.
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| Posted 5/26/10 11:05 AM |
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NinaLemon
It's a boy!!!
Member since 10/07 6453 total posts
Name:
Jeannine
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
We both volunteer a lot, not just in DSS activities but in the community as well. We want the kids to grow up experiencing volunteerism in everyday life.
I do find that in all groups (child related or not) it is always the same group of people that do everything. I volunteer for a charitable guild with over 200 members and the same 20 people are the ones who do everything to keep the guild running. DH volunteers for local theaters and it is the same thing.
DSS little league came up with a solution that I really like, in order for your child to be in little league the parents have to commit to at least one volunteer activity; it could be as simple as running the concession stand during one game. I am the team mender - the kids can be rough on those uniforms and not everyone is comfortable sewing, so it helps everyone. I think it is a great idea and one we are considering using for the guild I belong too.
Volunteering has been a wonderful thing for us, we get more involved in our activities and make lasting friendships. I have learned so much from the people I have met in the various organizations I help out with, so much more than I ever could have learned by just watching.
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| Posted 5/26/10 11:21 AM |
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rojerono
Happiest.
Member since 8/06 13803 total posts
Name:
Jeannie
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Posted by NinaLemon
DSS little league came up with a solution that I really like, in order for your child to be in little league the parents have to commit to at least one volunteer activity;
I apologize, but I really think that is terribly unfair. I pay a registration fee for my children to be able to participate in community sports leagues. We go to as many games as possible and take him to practice and support their interests as much as possible. Dictating to people that they MUST volunteer is against the spirit of volunteering and ultimately is a punishment to any child who has parents who simply do not have the time to help out.
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| Posted 5/26/10 11:32 AM |
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NinaLemon
It's a boy!!!
Member since 10/07 6453 total posts
Name:
Jeannine
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Posted by rojerono
Posted by NinaLemon
DSS little league came up with a solution that I really like, in order for your child to be in little league the parents have to commit to at least one volunteer activity;
I apologize, but I really think that is terribly unfair. I pay a registration fee for my children to be able to participate in community sports leagues. We go to as many games as possible and take him to practice and support their interests as much as possible. Dictating to people that they MUST volunteer is against the spirit of volunteering and ultimately is a punishment to any child who has parents who simply do not have the time to help out.
I understand what you are saying, but couldn't you also look at it as showing your children that pitching in and helping out is part of the game. The reason this all came about was because no one would volunteer, everyone was "too busy" so it was the same few people trying to make it work for the kids, the league almost dissolved because parents wouldn't help out. Those registration fees don't pay for people to work the concession stands or for the coaches etc. If parents are there watching a game why can't they take an hour and sell hot dogs too? With the number of games each season I find it hard to believe that one parent can't make it to just one single game to help out.
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| Posted 5/26/10 11:39 AM |
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rojerono
Happiest.
Member since 8/06 13803 total posts
Name:
Jeannie
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Posted by NinaLemon
I understand what you are saying, but couldn't you also look at it as showing your children that pitching in and helping out is part of the game. The reason this all came about was because no one would volunteer, everyone was "too busy" so it was the same few people trying to make it work for the kids, the league almost dissolved because parents wouldn't help out. Those registration fees don't pay for people to work the concession stands or for the coaches etc. If parents are there watching a game why can't they take an hour and sell hot dogs too? With the number of games each season I find it hard to believe that one parent can't make it to just one single game to help out.
My friend Jen has 3 kids, no husband, 2 jobs and a son who absolutely adores baseball. WE take her son to his games because she absolutely has no time.. and any spare time she has goes toward spending quality time with her kids - not hawking hot dogs. The idea that Tom might not be able to play a game he loves because his mom can't volunteer rubs me wrong. And yeah.. exceptions can be made but then it becomes a slippery slope.. ya know?
I just really hate the idea of forced volunteerism. A kid will learn a lot more about generosity of spirit if they have parents who are doing things with them because they love to do them.. rather than b*tching about what they are being 'forced' to do.
I am sensitive about this subject because it touches me closely. I like to choose what i do with my time. If our little league or lacrosse club implemented this policy, I guarantee it would shut down because there would be a tremendous amount of outrage and kids being pulled out by parents who feel judged for their choices.
Message edited 5/26/2010 12:06:14 PM.
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| Posted 5/26/10 12:05 PM |
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CathyB
Member since 5/05 19403 total posts
Name:
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Next year I'm going to join the PTA and I'm really considering the Daisy Troop leader. I have a little "fear of the unknown" going on with that but I'm sure it will work out.
Oh, and I said I'd help out with pictures for DS's soccer team.
The hardest thing for me is that even though I'm a SAHM, DH works really long hours so I don't usually have someone to watch the other one. I'm hoping that now that we'll be in the public school I'll meet more parents who are willing to help out with babysitting here and there, at our preschool the moms tend to be standoff-ish. 
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| Posted 5/26/10 12:12 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Message edited 9/1/2011 3:47:10 PM.
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| Posted 5/26/10 12:47 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Message edited 9/1/2011 3:47:24 PM.
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| Posted 5/26/10 12:50 PM |
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paulandles912
My children are a blessing!
Member since 5/05 2598 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
DS is only in Pre-K, but so far I haven't really volunteered for anything. Like Barbara said, I need to save my paid days off to cover when he's not in school. Andrew plays soccer, but I haven't had to volunteer. I offered up DH to coach, but they didn't need him.
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| Posted 5/26/10 1:12 PM |
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joenick
Us
Member since 6/06 9370 total posts
Name:
Valerie...aka...Do Me A Favor?
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
I volunteer a LOT.
I was Nicholas' class mom in Kindergarten and First grade.
I am Joey's class mom in Pre-K this year. Will most likely do it for Kindergarten if I am selected.
I just became Grade Rep for 3rd grade, following the kids through till graduation...it's a pretty big job. Not sure if I'm excited about that yet. 
I volunteer for Bingo Night and the Fashion Show at school.
I am involved with the PTA.
I pretty much have my hand in everything.
I'm exhausted.
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| Posted 5/26/10 5:36 PM |
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ddunne2
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 4189 total posts
Name:
Doreen
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Posted by rojerono
I just really hate the idea of forced volunteerism. A kid will learn a lot more about generosity of spirit if they have parents who are doing things with them because they love to do them.. rather than b*tching about what they are being 'forced' to do.
I agree with this. We were looking at a Catholic school for my son and I was completely turned off that i was forced to volunteer OR I could pay $600 volunteer buyout. Needless to say, we are going the public school route. Its complete BS.
Message edited 5/26/2010 7:27:31 PM.
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| Posted 5/26/10 7:26 PM |
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HillandRon
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 2922 total posts
Name:
Hillary
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
I hope to get involved with PTA when JAcob enters in the fall. We will be new to the neighborhood so I thought this would be the best way to meet other people and also for the his grade school to get to know my face...
I think Jacob will not be one of the sports types plus My DH is not very into sports so that route will probably not happen....
I htink boy scouts doesn't happen until 1st grade for us..
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| Posted 5/26/10 8:26 PM |
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ChrisDee
My Girls
Member since 11/06 9543 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
I have been class mom every year since Kindergarten, I am in the PTA and run the schools Author Visit, i help out at lots of the yearly functions too. I am also the Brownie leader for Jordan. YES, It is the same group of parents that help out over and over again. I know lots of SAHM that volunteer for nothing but that is their choice. It is not easy for me, DH works nights and LONG hours in the city. I work 3 long days(but I do work for myself ) I have alot on my plate. However, the things that I love to do most in my crazy life are the things that I do for my girls. I love that all the kids up at school call my name from the playground when they see me at school and run up and hug me. Jordan loves it too! I feel bad for those that just do not have the time to do it but would love to.
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| Posted 5/26/10 9:17 PM |
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rojerono
Happiest.
Member since 8/06 13803 total posts
Name:
Jeannie
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Posted by ChrisDee
I feel bad for those that just do not have the time to do it but would love to.
And I just wanted to say how grateful I am for people like y'all who can get to these activities and make an effort to include and love the other little ducklings whose parents don't have the same opportunities. I know that my SAHM friends who are among the consistent volunteers always treat Robbie and No as part of their own so they don't feel too left out or abandoned and it means the WORLD to me!
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| Posted 5/27/10 6:40 AM |
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LisaI
Momma's Little Beans
Member since 1/06 3923 total posts
Name:
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Pretty much everything. I can as a SAHM. Now that I will have two in school next year I am splitting my time equally or as much as I can. I have been a room mom for 4 years and will continue to do so but now in two classes. Even though it's a lot of running around with their acitivties and at times can cause me to be down right overwhelmed, I suck it up (after venting ) and carry on. There will be a day close enough I can't and my children won't let me
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| Posted 5/27/10 9:12 AM |
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NinaLemon
It's a boy!!!
Member since 10/07 6453 total posts
Name:
Jeannine
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
Posted by rojerono
Posted by NinaLemon
...
My friend Jen has 3 kids, no husband, 2 jobs and a son who absolutely adores baseball. WE take her son to his games because she absolutely has no time.. and any spare time she has goes toward spending quality time with her kids - not hawking hot dogs. The idea that Tom might not be able to play a game he loves because his mom can't volunteer rubs me wrong. And yeah.. exceptions can be made but then it becomes a slippery slope.. ya know?
I just really hate the idea of forced volunteerism. A kid will learn a lot more about generosity of spirit if they have parents who are doing things with them because they love to do them.. rather than b*tching about what they are being 'forced' to do.
I am sensitive about this subject because it touches me closely. I like to choose what i do with my time. If our little league or lacrosse club implemented this policy, I guarantee it would shut down because there would be a tremendous amount of outrage and kids being pulled out by parents who feel judged for their choices.
I totally hear you and I absolutely hate that it had to be this way, but I have to say I am glad they did it and it is working out. The people who were taking on all of the work were burned out and could not do it anymore. No one would step up and it came down to make it a condition of the league or close the league all together.
I will say, not one child in my DSSs age group dropped out of the league (I don't know about other age groups) but it did work for this league.
There are also volunteer positions that don't really require time, parents can provide snacks for the team after the game. They tried to make it so, if you had no time you could buy a few bags of oranges, and if money was tight, you could spend some time. If you can't make it to games, maybe you could run the phone tree. It wasn't set up as 'we hate these lazy parents and are going to force them to work!" it was done to save the league.
But i 1000% agree with you, I hate the idea that you have to force people to volunteer.
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| Posted 5/27/10 10:28 AM |
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
with my oldest DD I was involved at school and PTA always class mom and also with my 8yr old when she first starte but when I had my 3rd child and started watching my nephews I stopped doing the school activities because it was too much with all the kids
my DH coaches 2 of my DDs soccer teams
he also volunteers on her other team
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| Posted 5/27/10 10:33 AM |
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cantbelieveit
Love these kids!
Member since 10/05 4708 total posts
Name:
Tammy
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
I'll be honest and say that I probably won't volunteer for much other than school trips, parties, and the like. My DD is still young but wants to try out some sports and I am just not that good at sports nor do I know enough about them to help out. I show my appreciation to those that do.
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| Posted 5/27/10 7:15 PM |
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Bops
My 3 wishes
Member since 12/07 13625 total posts
Name:
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Re: How many of DC's activities do you volunteer for?
My DS is only in Pre-K, but the teacher is always looking for volunteers for various activities....Myself and a small handful of the moms (and a dad) are the only ones who are there time and time again...
In our peticular situation, all but 2 of the mom's in the class are SAHM and they still don't participate...
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| Posted 5/27/10 10:14 PM |
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