How would you respond to this?

I am 14 weeks pg with baby #3. DS will be 6 in November and DD will be 3 in October. Three people so far has asked me if this pregnancy was planned and I find that such a rude question How would you respond to this question? I would never ask that question to anyone but there obviously are people who think that it's a reasonable question.

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My boss actually asked me that I was like wtf??
My repsonse was if you're not doing everything you can to prevent it, then all babies are planned.

I dont have the right answer, but I can see you getting annoyed with it. Some people don't know boundaries.

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People are so rude. When I got pregnant with DS on our honeymoon- I had so many comments about how it wasn't planned and if I wanted my baby. I mean people were counting on their fingers how many months I was, and if I was pregnant before I got married. I can't even make this stuff up- people are just rude!

How would you respond to this?

i've had at least 5 people ask me if this was a planned pregnancy or not - it's very rude of them to have asked!

i'm not very confrontational so i just say yes and avoid them after that

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I don't know what I would say. OMG!

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Ugh!

I got pg after TTC for over a year and going through fertility treatments. Nobody at work knows any of this. So when I came out at work, EVERYONE was asking, "was this planned?" I would NEVER ask that.

I wish I had a snappy comeback, but I just always said, "We always wanted kids."

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When I was pregnant I was surprised by how many people came out and asked me that. I got the feeling that most people felt it was a perfectly acceptable question and that if they were wondering about it, they had every right to know these private details.

I usually just said something like "this baby is wanted and loved and we couldn't be more excited about it." And I made sure that the look on my face made them aware of how uncomfortable I was with the conversation.....although they usually were oblivious to that.

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My son Ryan is 6, my daughter Emma is 4 and my baby is 2.....I'm pregnant with my fourth and due in November....I am asked all the time if we planned it- which we did. We wanted them close in age and honestly it's already chaotic, what's a little more?! People are nuts! Babies are miracles no matter how they come about, no one has any right to question motives or whatnot!

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Omg...thank you for all the responses! I am so amazed at how people would just come out and ask a personal question like that! A baby is a blessing no matter if the pregnancy was planned or not planned. The last person that asked if it was planned I responded: is this a serious question? Do you know she actually said yes I just gave her a look and she said: it's alright, you don't have to tell me People are unbelievable

How would you respond to this?

I would ask if they had PLANNED on asking such a rude question. It's not like your kids are 16 and 13... not that it would be ok to ask them either but I mean how close together do they think kids should be in order to be "planned"? This is my first and I had one person ask me if I had planned on getting pregnant and one person say "Is this a "Congratulations" pregnancy??" They even did the "air quotes" when they said Congratulations which irritated me even more... My response to that was "what the hell does that even mean?" People are just generally stupid.

How would you respond to this?

"thats not really anyones buisness" would be my response....

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I would say with a straight serious face accompanied with an attitude "planned or not, we are excited and happy and that's all that matters!"

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It's a rude question - but I'd just say Yes -

if it was an 'oops' pregnancy and you don't want to say that, then lie and say it was planned. -

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I would flat out ask them why they would ask a question like that. People have no bountries when it comes to pregnant people.

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My FIL asked me this (and this is only our second). I told him that it wasn't, but I've heard a lot of sad stories in the past few years, and I feel lucky to have one healthy DD and another one on the way. It shut him up pretty effectively.

I HATE this question... but have a couple of answers if you're in a b!tchy mood:

1) No. Are you going to take back your congratulations now?

2) Yes, it was... by G-d.

3) Yes. After a few more, we want our own reality show!

Re: How would you respond to this?

Message edited 8/14/2012 3:52:29 PM.

How would you respond to this?

i haven't come out to anyone at work yet. I'm not showing yet so i figure when i start to show i will let them know. i have no idea whether or not they will ask this but i wouldn't be surprised if they did. Our parents know, and they knew our struggles with IF, so they would never ask us this as well as our siblings...

How would you respond to this?

"Does it matter?"

How would you respond to this?

I hate this question. As someone who tried for a year and a half and was on fertility meds, this baby WAS DEFINITELY PLANNED and will be extremely loved. One of DH's friends said, "So, you got drunk and forgot to use protection?" I put on my most serious face and said, "This baby was wanted and planned." Some people are just SO rude :(

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I am bracing myself for this question once we start telling people. My twins are 19 months we needed IF help for them and this happened in one night! So while were weren't "planning on it" happening bc we didn't think it could happen. It did and I wouldn't say it was unplanned.

Tell them whatever you want, lie if you want. It is none of their business! After having twins I was amazed what private questions people I knew and complete strangers will ask me. I have fun making up stories now :)

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This is my first pregnancy and people were always asking " Did you plan this or not?" I would always say "both" and walk away it left people confused enough to not have anything to say while I went about my business. It is no ones business. i was really surprised at how many people asked this question.