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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
sorry you are dealing with this.
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Posted 10/29/10 2:58 PM  |
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snowprincess
My happy babies
Member since 3/06 3428 total posts
Name:
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Posted by neener1211
Posted by 4ForMe
What do we even do.
I'm only going to address this part, because all of us arguing over who should be angry at this kid, and who isn't and flaming other posters, isn't going to change anything.
If I were you, I would let all of my neighbors know so that you can all look out for each others children on the block. I would also encourage each of my neighbors in writing to lawmakers to see what can be done to supply this information to neighborhoods in the future. Even if it took me writing a letter, passing it out and having people sign it and mail it off.
I know that I would want to know if this had happened and be able to be extra diligent in keeping my eyes open for not only my own kids, but other kids, and even adults in my neighborhood. If more people speak up and do something about not being notified, perhaps change will happen.
That's the real issue, being notified, no matter what age the person is, should occur. Because it doesn't matter if the rapist was 17 years and 355 days old or 85 . If they committed a crime like this, (putting what should happen to the general him/her aside), the public should be notified. Age in this case, should not be factor-that's my opinion anyway.
be careful some these ideas can get you in trouble because of laws that protect minors and sexual assault victims
be careful if you state any names to other people
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| Posted 10/29/10 2:59 PM |
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Posted by 4ForMe
This kid also fathered a child in 7th grade.
Are you close with your neighbors and if so how are they dealing with this?
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| Posted 10/29/10 3:18 PM |
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Just reading this thread again now...........I forgot to ask in my OP how you found out this info, as well.
Can someone in the know as well elaborate a bit more on laws to protect the minor who did this?
(i.e. if OP was to tell her neighbors, could she get into trouble?).
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| Posted 10/29/10 3:25 PM |
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4ForMe
:)
Member since 11/05 5666 total posts
Name:
Barbara
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Posted by Kara
I would be horrified and sick to learn something like this. I can understand why the OP is so upset and concerned. Sex offenders have an extremely scary rate of recidivism. I completely understand being appalled by this entirely situation.
I have to ask, though... If he didn't have to register and you weren't officially notified, how do you know what happened? Did you do any independent research to make sure you have the story accurate?
ETA -- I don't mean you have to hire a PI or anything -- just curious if you researched court records or if you are taking someone's word for this story. (Court records may be sealed, of course, if he's a minor.)
First, I am not the type and would never spread any rumors, especially about a child.
To be honest, I heard it a couple of days ago from another neighbor who works in the school district. I didn't want to believe her and I wasn't convinced because it is just so unbelievable to me. However, yesterday I spoke yesterday with another parent who's husband is a Suffolk County cop, and she confirmed it. Her son is also on the football team along with the child that was raped, so she was at the game last week that the child decided to sit out for. In fact, the coach had to let the whole team know that this boy was on the opposing team.
It is actually very out in the open at school. It seems like the boy's (the one that was raped) classmates are really being compassionate.
And to a previous poster that asked, the teen that did this is 13.
Message edited 10/29/2010 3:34:18 PM.
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| Posted 10/29/10 3:29 PM |
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Posted by Goldi0218
Posted by SusiBee
How old is a child in middle school ?
12-13-14 ?
It is positively frightening that a child has the KNOWLEDGE and the RESOURCES to obtain date rape drug, has the KNOWLEDGE of how to use it, and the KNOWLEDGE of what to do to his victim.
This child is broken.
I fear that he will do this again because there is so much anger and violence in him at such a young age.
You would be surprised what children are exposed to. I have had 8 year olds in my class who could describe sex acts I have never heard of. Not exaggerating in the least. I have seen 5 year olds cuffed and carted to a psych ward because of things they have done and said. It is pathetic. In my heart of hearts, I know these kids cannot be rehabilitated. The future is very clear - dangerous and clear.
I hear ya! My very first job out of college was working in a residential treatment center for kids 12-18. I worked in the girl's cottage. Most of them were between 12-16. Sick, sick, SICK backgrounds. I believe a lot of it also went back generations, sadly enough. Most of them really didn't stand a chance in our society when they got out of the place I worked, and talked about how they were definitely going onto prison as an adult. 
I would say that most of them also had been sexually abused and had all kinds of mental health issues, and pretty much all of them came from a broken family, were born to someone way too young, or the opposite----came from a super rich family but just had no supervision there either because family was at work or wherever and issues were swept under the rug until it was too late.
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| Posted 10/29/10 3:32 PM |
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debsey75
My two best friends!
Member since 11/06 5879 total posts
Name:
Debbie
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
WOW, I am aggravated and appalled and I dont live by this child. Keep an eye on him and your children the best that you can.
If he is doing this at 13, what will 15 bring for him..
Sorry to sound harse but maybe a few yrs in jail with other rapists treating him as their boy toy will set his sorry arse straight.
Disguisting is an understatment!
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| Posted 10/29/10 3:34 PM |
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Ayne11
Yep
Member since 1/09 18021 total posts
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
I wonder why this never hit Newsday. It seems these types of stories are always in the paper unfortunately. 
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| Posted 10/29/10 3:42 PM |
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Daisy32
Mommy
Member since 2/08 8081 total posts
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
I know I commented on this already but being a mom now this story makes me sick to my stomach....knowing this kid is just walking around. 
VERY scary world we live in!!
ETA to the OP....please keep us informed with any updates (ie: if you were able to contact local politicians/ law enforcement and what they say, etc)
Message edited 10/29/2010 3:55:17 PM.
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| Posted 10/29/10 3:53 PM |
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8ternity
<3
Member since 11/08 10586 total posts
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Formally NYPD-Wife
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
omg I am sick to my stomach !!!
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| Posted 10/29/10 4:01 PM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
I do believe in second chances. Like a teenager caught stealing. Doing drug. EVEN selling drugs (to get extra $$) Or wrong time, wrong place.
But rape? No. It was a premedited act on top of that.
I do think he should have been in jail and trialed as an adult on the nature of his crime.
Now, he is free to go. Like just some community service. That's a slight tap on the wrist for the crime he did.
Yes, I WOULD be concerned for my boys. You bet, I would watch for my boys at all times with that kid around.
Can you imagine what the raped boy is going through? He was raped and HE has to skip the game so he would not face the rapist. That's insane!!!!!
How would we feel if it was OUR son that had been raped? Would we feel sympathy to give this rapist a second chance. HECK NO!!! I would DEMAND that this kid be removed from the field so MY kid does not have to face him HOW CRUEL!!!!
What if we had been raped as teenagers and the rapist got 2 months in a juvenile detention? That's unreal!!!!! Yes, we would be disgusted that we had been raped and the person go a slap on the wrist and is free to go among other children.
HE IS a sex offender and should be on all registries.
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| Posted 10/29/10 5:59 PM |
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alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!
Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name:
Allison
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Posted by Ayne11
I wonder why this never hit Newsday. It seems these types of stories are always in the paper unfortunately.
because both kids are minors.
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| Posted 10/29/10 7:03 PM |
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MamaLeen
:)
Member since 10/09 4594 total posts
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E
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Omg, I am so sorry you have to deal with this. 
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| Posted 10/29/10 7:49 PM |
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Ok this is like the 10th time I'm posting on this but why didn't one of the kids move? I guess there's lots to the story we don't know.
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| Posted 10/29/10 8:02 PM |
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Janice
Sweet Jessie Quinn
Member since 5/05 27567 total posts
Name:
Janice
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
I feel sick.
In all honesty, my first thought is to put the house on the market and see what bites we get.
I need peace and serenity.
I could not handle my son having a monster out for his a$$ next door.
Sorry to be blunt, but just reading OP...I would die.
i am sorry your family is going through this.
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| Posted 10/29/10 8:19 PM |
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neenie
Member since 5/05 22351 total posts
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Posted by Janice
I feel sick.
In all honesty, my first thought is to put the house on the market and see what bites we get.
I need peace and serenity.
I could not handle my son having a monster out for his a$$ next door.
Sorry to be blunt, but just reading OP...I would die.
i am sorry your family is going through this.
I feel the same way I really don't know what i'd do.... i'm sorry you're in this horrible situation!
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| Posted 10/29/10 8:27 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
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:)
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Posted by Mushesgirl
The individual who perpetrated this will never be a 'normal' member of society. And to be concerned about his mental health just shows (again) how upside down this country is. I've said this before on this website and i'll say it again, that I feel the country as a whole is upside down. Criminals are the new victims. Really?
WAKE UP HE'LL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR NEXT.
Well said. Too bad for this deranged "child". No one should have to pay the price for the person he has become (I dont care WHAT his upbringing is or was like). No one. Take the key and lock him up before he ruins OTHER lives. OP, I would go ballistic...find out your rights asap!!!
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| Posted 10/29/10 8:32 PM |
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Jan1975
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Member since 8/09 3846 total posts
Name:
Sarah
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Posted by SusiBee
How old is a child in middle school ?
12-13-14 ?
It is positively frightening that a child has the KNOWLEDGE and the RESOURCES to obtain date rape drug, has the KNOWLEDGE of how to use it, and the KNOWLEDGE of what to do to his victim.
This child is broken.
I fear that he will do this again because there is so much anger and violence in him at such a young age.
As a middle school teacher I would be frightened to even have a student like this in my class for fear for the other children.
He should not be in a mainstream school, he should not be allowed to play football. By doing so the victim is still being vicitmized.
This kid should be in a rehabiliation center until he is 18. Unfortunately, I am doubtful that a person who is capable of such a henious CRIME can be rehabilated at all. Perhaps I am jaded, maybe I should be willing to give people the benefit of the doubt, but now that I am a mother I see the world with different yese. You better believe that if my daughter was in school with someone like this I would be trying my hardest to have him removed or I would pull her out.
This is unacceptable and a disgrace. He does NOT get my sympathy.
Message edited 10/29/2010 8:50:28 PM.
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| Posted 10/29/10 8:49 PM |
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Stacey1403
Where it all began....
Member since 5/05 24065 total posts
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
I find it a little hard to believe that this kid would be able to play sports and such without any kind of repercussion I would think many, many parents would be outraged. I would think the victims family would fight this tooth and nail to get that kid away from other kids.
If it is true I would be super pizzed/fearful/upset, but I would investigate more to find out how true everything is. I have a feeling there may be some exaggeration in this story (not by the OP but by the ones telling it) I just can't see how there wouldn't be more public outrage.
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| Posted 10/29/10 8:58 PM |
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sweetie101
you make me smile :o)
Member since 5/08 4419 total posts
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
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| Posted 10/29/10 9:05 PM |
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MrsGmomof3
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Member since 6/08 3290 total posts
Name:
Irrelevant
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Baby rapists do not deserve to EVER see the light of day again.... regardless of their age, circumstances, or wherever they want to "place blame" for their actions. Making excuses for the perpetrator is just sickening. NO SECOND CHANCES for child molesters 
If this were my neighborhood, I am pretty sure I would have a hard time not warning every person I know
There would also be a for sale sign on my lawn PRONTO.
Message edited 10/29/2010 9:13:13 PM.
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| Posted 10/29/10 9:11 PM |
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Sunday
In love with a boy named Luca
Member since 6/09 1799 total posts
Name:
`
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
Posted by snowprincess
Posted by neener1211
Posted by 4ForMe
What do we even do.
I'm only going to address this part, because all of us arguing over who should be angry at this kid, and who isn't and flaming other posters, isn't going to change anything.
If I were you, I would let all of my neighbors know so that you can all look out for each others children on the block. I would also encourage each of my neighbors in writing to lawmakers to see what can be done to supply this information to neighborhoods in the future. Even if it took me writing a letter, passing it out and having people sign it and mail it off.
I know that I would want to know if this had happened and be able to be extra diligent in keeping my eyes open for not only my own kids, but other kids, and even adults in my neighborhood. If more people speak up and do something about not being notified, perhaps change will happen.
That's the real issue, being notified, no matter what age the person is, should occur. Because it doesn't matter if the rapist was 17 years and 355 days old or 85 . If they committed a crime like this, (putting what should happen to the general him/her aside), the public should be notified. Age in this case, should not be factor-that's my opinion anyway.
be careful some these ideas can get you in trouble because of laws that protect minors and sexual assault victims
be careful if you state any names to other people
IMO the OP has no duty to anyone to keep her mouth shut. She has the freedom to express her opinion to every neighbor on the block if she wants.
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| Posted 10/29/10 9:18 PM |
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
As an attorney who has represented children like the one you speak of, I can guarantee that he was likely not sent to just any juvenile detention, but a facility tailored to sex offenders. He is probably on intensive probation with many people counseling and closely supervising him. Out of curiosity, how do you know all of this? I am sure that he would be in a facility a LOT longer than a few months if what you are saying is true. What county are you in?
Due to the fact that he is a minor and the fact that he is so intensely supervised, his privacy will be respected. At his age, the system works to try to treat what is obviously mental illness.
I can understand that you are afraid for your children, but what do you exactly want done? Trust me, the juvenile system is doing everything it can to help him get better and learn from his experience and to protect others.
ETA-Just to clarify before what I said is taken out of context, I mean what do you want done within the confines of the laws that we have available to us.
Children like this are treated as ill. There is a huge debate, at least when I last dealt with this sort of case, about whether mandatory reporting laws should apply to minors.
The perpetrator is obviously ill. It is a sad situation all around.
Message edited 10/29/2010 9:26:58 PM.
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| Posted 10/29/10 9:19 PM |
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LightUpOurLife
Totally in love
Member since 8/06 12785 total posts
Name:
Bonnie-Jean
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
I think that is a horrible story and I feel for you.
I also think some of the comments directed at LB (headover) are absolutely horrible. She is voicing an opinion that she feels strongly about, stop projecting hatred at her.
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| Posted 10/29/10 9:44 PM |
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Momma2Be
Mommy of an angel
Member since 10/09 5911 total posts
Name:
Dina
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Re: I am so aggravated and appalled.
What an awful situation you are in and that poor boy (the victim). I think you are 100% right in your concerns for your sons' safety and that of the other children in your neighborhood. I know nothing about the laws surrounding sex offenses in regards to minors but am shocked that he is allowed to return to mainstream school and participate in extracurricular activities, especially since the victim is on the opposing team. So sorry that you are dealing with this
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| Posted 10/29/10 9:46 PM |
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