I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

For the past three mornings, Johnny has been trembling/shaking when I am getting him out the door to preschool. He starts shallow breathing too, like the start of an anxiety attack....then his lip starts shaking and he gets REALLY upset..clings to me and just cries.

The teacher has to rip him out of my arms and the whole time he is sobbing and yelling "MAAAMAAAA!!!!!". It is REALLY upsetting me.

He is not sick..we went to the doctor yesterday. And this is a child who LOVES school...was waving me out the door for the past few months and would ask for school on the weekends.

Now he is crying "NO SCHOOL!" and I can't get over how upset he is.

Do you think this is possible a phase?? DH thinks maybe someone at school scolded him or maybe another child hurt him and he is upset about that? I have no clue, he can't tell us what is wrong other than "no school mama".

I am just upset right now. The whole drive home I think about the look of terror on his face. This can't be normal

Edited to add: The teacher told me nothing has happened other than last week a huge gust of wind knocked him over while they were out walking and it scared him. But that was last wednesday, he was fine at school after that and its nothing that seemilngly tramautized him...

Message edited 3/11/2009 8:44:55 AM.

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

I am by no means at that time of Kristina's life.... but I would think that it's a phase.

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

We have weeks like that, he can be fine going to daycare everyday for months, and than for one week, its crying and reaching for me when I leave. I think its a phase, it should pass.

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

We went through a phase like that with Alex. Even now, on occasion, in the morning she will cry that she doesn't want to go to school. This from the same kid who won't leave school with me until everyone leaves and they start closing the doors, that's how much she loves it!

It DID freak me out and DH and I wondered if something happened at school to set her off. I talked with all her teachers, and also stopped in a few times during that week to just observe, to ease my mind that everything seemed to be ok, and once I was gone, she adjusted just fine

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

Good god I hope you ladies are right. This doesn't seem like just a small setback, that is whats bothering me. I expect some mornings for him to be clingier than others...but its like someone told him he'll be in a torture chamber for the next 4 hours with the way he is acting!!! It's awful. I could hear his screams leaving the school, his teacher and assistants are completely baffled. He is the LAST one to cry about going!! So odd...

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

My Dd went through a phase too but if you think its more than that do they have anyone he can talk to like a school psychologist? I dont know how old DS is or what school hes at, ours does but its an intergrated scchool so they have all of that. Did you try asking him why he doesnt want to go? I know you probably did that. I hope for you it gets better and him too, it really hurts seeing them like that. Breaks your heart. My mom said I cried for 3 months straight and she had to come back a few times because I was so bad!

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

Posted by kimmie

My Dd went through a phase too but if you think its more than that do they have anyone he can talk to like a school psychologist? I dont know how old DS is or what school hes at, ours does but its an intergrated scchool so they have all of that. Did you try asking him why he doesnt want to go? I know you probably did that. I hope for you it gets better and him too, it really hurts seeing them like that. Breaks your heart. My mom said I cried for 3 months straight and she had to come back a few times because I was so bad!

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

Aww, poor little guy. I hope it's a phase!

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

It sounds like a phase. I know how terribly upsetting it is. Hang in there! I hope it passes soon!!

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

My son goes 2 days a week. Weeks will go by and he runs to class and then out of nowhere one day will cry and cling to me yelling, "I dont want to go". It is very upsetting because all you want to do is put them back in the car, go home and cuddle with them. It wil pass.

Many

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

I think it's a phase, the seperation anxiety. It should go away in a while. Maybe you can try giving him a picuture of you or spraying a blanket or toy with your perfume for him to take with him so he has the reminder when he wants to be with you.

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

Can you maybe talk to him? Maybe something happened with one of the other children that the teacher wasn't aware of and maybe he will be able to tell you that.

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

Ryan is totally not there yet. But if I had to guess, it sounds to me like a phase of separation anxiety.

Sometimes kids just don't get that "you will come back".

Have you left him anywhere else (playdate, grandma's house, etc)? If so, did he have this same reaction? Or does it only happen at school? If it only happens at school than I might be a bit more concerned. Maybe see if you can privately "shadow" the class? (I wouldn't let the teacher know you are shadowing, maybe talk to the principal/director).

Re: I am upset about something, would appreciate thoughts/advice...

The teacher just emailed me....

He was knocked over by a big gust of wind on a walk recently, as I stated before. and since then whenever they get ready to walk he gets upset. I still don't understand why they took these poor kids out on a day where there were 60mph winds. Half the class was knocked to the ground..it really upset him.

Makes sense!!! I hope this is what it is!! At least I can work on that...

Message edited 3/11/2009 10:13:25 AM.