I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

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Message edited 6/15/2008 11:25:42 AM.

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

Sounds to me like she doesn't want to be left out. I'm sure jealousy plays a big part in this. Hopefully, she's also thought deeply about being a single mother and what she is doing. Cause it wont be easy for her (it's not easy with 2 parents). And she most likely will lean to her brother and you for help. I've learned that is what people do.

I'm sorry that you have to deal with this. I wish I had some great advice. I would tell you to stop letting her get you crazy. But easier said than done. Its too bad you can't enjoy the fact that you have someone to go through this all with. And I hear you with the "what if she gets pg first". That happened with a good friend of mine. I was doing this, then we were in it together and now she's 5 or 6mths along and I'm still here.

Venting is always good. This is a good place to vent.

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

All I can say is that IF issues can bring out the worst in us. For me, it brings out jealously, competition, insecurity, anger, resentment, etc. With that said, watch out for those feelings in yourself. The only one that ends up hurting is YOU!

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

awwwwww don't let her steal your thunder!
XOXOXO
BOTB

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

I'm so sorry. The whole thing is awful.

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

Your SIL sounds similar to mine - though she isn't close w/ DH or me and truly seems to resent me for some reason, though I still don't fully get why.... she just 'happened' to get pg (won't go into more detail than that but lets just say she has some track record)... and it just 'happened' at a time when her due date was 3 1/2 weeks before our wedding...

Both DH and I still think she planned the whole thing---- b/c she didn't like us being in the spotlight so to speak and it seems as though your SIL is the same way...

Hang in there- how does your DH feel about this? I would have him approach her and tell her that IF treatments are very difficult to go thru and you don't want to discuss it w/ her and neither does he- and that the 2 of you need more YOU time w/o her--- maybe if she's out of your triangle and it's back to just the 2 of you she'll get bored w/ IF treatments since she has no one to talk about (it really seems like she's doing it for attention).

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

I am so sorry you have to deal with. DH's friend's sister is like this. She has to copy everything her brother does.

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

Message edited 11/22/2010 10:52:47 AM.

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

I am sorry. That is pretty bizarre behavior. I mean that is seriously odd to say the least.
I would just yes her to death. Don't compare yourself and let her get to you

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

That really is bizzaro behavior. Can you ask her to not talk to you about this kind of stuff since it's difficult for you to talk about given your IF issues? Maybe your DH can have a talk with her about it. While I'm not in that sort of situation, my DH has asked certain family members to not bring anything up to me unless I bring up the topic. So far, it's been respected.

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

I don't think you're wrong at all. It all does sound a little strange. And if she does get pg, you're going to have to see her on a constant basis with a preggo belly? Who would want that?

I'm sorry this is happening to you. All I can say is, take each day as it comes. And try not to let her get in the way of what you need to do to keep a positive attitude about getting pg.

Re: I feel terrible..and torn...I need to vent.

Thanks girls Glad to know I am not alone in thinking it's strange! JennyPenny - no she doesn't have a boyfriend, she has an anon. donor.

I may just have to ask my DH to talk to her but it is just so awkward...plus I don't want him to get mad at ME because I feel like he'll say I am being unfair to her