If your child were being bullied

If your child were being bullied, how would you handle it? How would you equip your child to handle bullies in school? (Or if your child already has had to deal with this in school, how did you/they handle it?)

Re: If your child were being bullied

I'd get all Rebecca De Mornay ala "hand that rocks the table" on them and say "listen you little f**k" in the school yard.

Re: If your child were being bullied

In all honesty... I don't know HOW I would react...

Re: If your child were being bullied

Re: If your child were being bullied

I guess it would depend on the situation - who it was, how old dc was, where it was, etc.

Re: If your child were being bullied

I honestly have no idea... DS is only a baby now but just the idea of him being abused by his peers either verbally or physically makes my stomach turn and my blood boil!

Re: If your child were being bullied

Message edited 6/2/2012 10:32:14 PM.

Re: If your child were being bullied

I would do whatever I had to do to make it stop.

My ds is 5. One little boy has been a little nasty to him at baseball, not letting him borrow his helmet, but he let the other kids share. I went out and bought the same one for my DS. Problem solved.

I'm sure things will get worse as they get older. I really hope it's not a huge issue for them though.

Re: If your child were being bullied

Oh. I can get pretty scary. I am a mother lion.

Re: If your child were being bullied

Re: If your child were being bullied

My DC's pre-K class has a bully. He has repeatedly called my DS names. He has also pushed or "accidentally hit" most of the kids repeatedly.

And, this is a private school, private pre-K. IMO, the kid should have been expelled. Some parents were told his behavior is due to ADD. Bull@#$%!! I've taught for 20 years, bullying is bullying and ADD is ADD... having ADD does not give you an excuse to be an a-hole!! The kid's father acts like a total meat-head ... that has to be where he is getting it from. I can't even look at the mother when she comes for pick-up.

I've used role play with my kids and taught them to repeat, "J, why did you just call me a ____?" loud enough so the teacher would hear. The teacher wasn't happy with that one

When I spoke to the teacher about the bully, almost daily, calling my son "a girl, a sissy" in front of most of the class since he plays with the girls more than the boys, I was told to arrange more boy play dates and expose my son to more sports I told her my son is who he is and why should my son have to change for the bully. As a teacher, I would never say that to a parent.

I then asked her what she, and the school, have done regarding the new NYS anti-bullying legislation. I got a blank stare. I then said, they still had time to implement a school wide plan but it does become law on Sept 1, 2012

Just yesterday my son told me the teacher sat him next to "J" at the same table. He said he didn't like sitting next to him so he moved closer to "I". If "J" has taunted my son all year and she, and every other parent knows about it, why would you sit them together???

I never, ever thought I would be capable of hating a 4 year old until I met this kid. He'll be in serious trouble by high school.

Re: If your child were being bullied

Bullying seems to start at around 2nd or 3rd grade, from what I have seen. Up until then, they just try to get each other in trouble there is still such a sweetness there. The way they nurture each other, and take special needs peers under thir wings is so beautiful. It makes you wish they coud keep that side forever.....

Re: If your child were being bullied

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH

My DC's pre-K class has a bully. He has repeatedly called my DS names. He has also pushed or "accidentally hit" most of the kids repeatedly.

And, this is a private school, private pre-K. IMO, the kid should have been expelled. Some parents were told his behavior is due to ADD. Bull@#$%!! I've taught for 20 years, bullying is bullying and ADD is ADD... having ADD does not give you an excuse to be an a-hole!! The kid's father acts like a total meat-head ... that has to be where he is getting it from. I can't even look at the mother when she comes for pick-up.

I've used role play with my kids and taught them to repeat, "J, why did you just call me a ____?" loud enough so the teacher would hear. The teacher wasn't happy with that one

When I spoke to the teacher about the bully, almost daily, calling my son "a girl, a sissy" in front of most of the class since he plays with the girls more than the boys, I was told to arrange more boy play dates and expose my son to more sports I told her my son is who he is and why should my son have to change for the bully. As a teacher, I would never say that to a parent.

I then asked her what she, and the school, have done regarding the new NYS anti-bullying legislation. I got a blank stare. I then said, they still had time to implement a school wide plan but it does become law on Sept 1, 2012

Just yesterday my son told me the teacher sat him next to "J" at the same table. He said he didn't like sitting next to him so he moved closer to "I". If "J" has taunted my son all year and she, and every other parent knows about it, why would you sit them together???

I never, ever thought I would be capable of hating a 4 year old until I met this kid. He'll be in serious trouble by high school.

Re: If your child were being bullied

I also find how the teacher responded despicable. It seems that everyone bends over backwards to accommodate kids like this. It perpetuates this horrible problem!!!

Re: If your child were being bullied

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH


Edited for space.

Have you spoken to the mom? I would try that. If it were my son I would want to know.

Re: If your child were being bullied

ugh. I don't even want to think about it. As a guidance counselor I have all the "tools" but I will probably be the psycho mom yelling at the bully

Re: If your child were being bullied

Bullied children are raised by a parent who is a bully. IMO It is a vicious cycle. I don't stand for it as a teacher. I am not a parent so do not know how I would handle it but I won't let it be. Unfortunately, bullying is so out of control these days. It is scary and so sad.

Re: If your child were being bullied

I honestly don't know what I'd do.
Bullying makes me want to wrap my kids in a bubble.
If it was happening at school, I'd go right to the teacher. If nothing is done, then to the principal.
Same if it was happening on a bus. Teacher, Principal, and Dept. of Transportation would hear it too!

Re: If your child were being bullied

Posted by greenybeans

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH


Edited for space.

Have you spoken to the mom? I would try that. If it were my son I would want to know.

EVERY parent in the class knows about this kid.

The mom definitely knows, the kid has a Behavioral Intervention Plan. Every day she gets a progress report. At pickup, I've heard the kid practically DEMAND his "I've been a good boy and haven't tormented anyone today" sticker

I can assure you it would be a complete waste of my time talking to this mother, I've seen her type before at many a parent-teacher conference. At a recent birthday party her son was acting very aggressively, trying to pin other kids down, in a bounce house. She sat for the entire two hours of the party playing with her smart phone... she never looked up, not once.

The kid is obviously craving attention and has a meat-head Dad that tells him and shows him that males should only be aggressive and dominant. While I do feel sorry for the kid, my sympathy ends where my son's right to be who he is begins.

We are a very open-minded liberal family. We know several gay couples, several inter-racial couples and several of them have children. A few family members, including their grandfather is severely disabled, I never had to teach my kids to accept all types of people as all types of people have been in their life from the moment they were born.

I just wish more parents were as evolved instead of passing their ignorance, aggression and fear onto their own children. It is 2012 isn't it?

Re: If your child were being bullied

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH

Posted by greenybeans

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH


Edited for space.

Have you spoken to the mom? I would try that. If it were my son I would want to know.

EVERY parent in the class knows about this kid.

The mom definitely knows, the kid has a Behavioral Intervention Plan. Every day she gets a progress report. At pickup, I've heard the kid practically DEMAND his "I've been a good boy and haven't tormented anyone today" sticker

I can assure you it would be a complete waste of my time talking to this mother, I've seen her type before at many a parent-teacher conference. At a recent birthday party her son was acting very aggressively, trying to pin other kids down, in a bounce house. She sat for the entire two hours of the party playing with her smart phone... she never looked up, not once.

The kid is obviously craving attention and has a meat-head Dad that tells him and shows him that males should only be aggressive and dominant. While I do feel sorry for the kid, my sympathy ends where my son's right to be who he is begins.

We are a very open-minded liberal family. We know several gay couples, several inter-racial couples and several of them have children. A few family members, including their grandfather is severely disabled, I never had to teach my kids to accept all types of people as all types of people have been in their life from the moment they were born.

I just wish more parents were as evolved instead of passing their ignorance, aggression and fear onto their own children. It is 2012 isn't it?

If the kid has special needs, I wonder why he is in this setting.

We all want the best for our kids but this does not seem like the right placement.

Re: If your child were being bullied

My DD, 7, is a constant target for bullying. She's autistic, you see and clearly the weakest one in her class. She loves everyone and wants desperately to fit in.
That said, she's been through the wringer: sexually abused, verbally bullied, physically bullied. All at the ripe age of 7.
I'm extremely on top of things with her. She's a high-functioning autistic and I'm teaching to hold her own.
The principal knows us quite well. I've been at the school many times (don't ask me about the police) and the teacher is well aware. She has an aide, who is also aware. But at the end of the day, teachers, aides, etc. don't always have their eyes on my kid. I teach her to WALK AWAY. We do a lot of role play at home and practice different scenarios. We've taught her to tell the teacher immediately if she feels like she's being bullied. And last case resort-with the new laws in place, there's always the threat of a lawsuit.
Best advice I can give: Be present-at the school and for your child. Make sure they know they're not in trouble for telling you what's going on (some kids threaten kids for telling), and believe and back your child up.

Re: If your child were being bullied

Re: If your child were being bullied

Re: If your child were being bullied

Posted by smdl

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH

Posted by greenybeans

Posted by Tah-wee-ZAH


Edited for space.

Have you spoken to the mom? I would try that. If it were my son I would want to know.

EVERY parent in the class knows about this kid.

The mom definitely knows, the kid has a Behavioral Intervention Plan. Every day she gets a progress report. At pickup, I've heard the kid practically DEMAND his "I've been a good boy and haven't tormented anyone today" sticker

I can assure you it would be a complete waste of my time talking to this mother, I've seen her type before at many a parent-teacher conference. At a recent birthday party her son was acting very aggressively, trying to pin other kids down, in a bounce house. She sat for the entire two hours of the party playing with her smart phone... she never looked up, not once.

The kid is obviously craving attention and has a meat-head Dad that tells him and shows him that males should only be aggressive and dominant. While I do feel sorry for the kid, my sympathy ends where my son's right to be who he is begins.

We are a very open-minded liberal family. We know several gay couples, several inter-racial couples and several of them have children. A few family members, including their grandfather is severely disabled, I never had to teach my kids to accept all types of people as all types of people have been in their life from the moment they were born.

I just wish more parents were as evolved instead of passing their ignorance, aggression and fear onto their own children. It is 2012 isn't it?

If the kid has special needs, I wonder why he is in this setting.

We all want the best for our kids but this does not seem like the right placement.

If he has a BIP, who is overseeing it??? It is clearly not working!!!!!

Re: If your child were being bullied

The best advice to parents is what the other poster said, you need to be present at the school and call everybody you can. As a teacher, I feel I have my hands tied most of the time. YOu call parents and they are in denial of what their child is doing.