Kind of freaking out...

So, DH and I lost our son at 36 weeks, as many of you know. His name was Nicholas Jr., obviously after DH. DH also has 2 other boys, George and Alex (yeah, he's Greek ).

So, my dilemma. I'm 28.5 weeks and we STILL have not come up with a name. I mean, we have some names we sort of like, but nothing is really jumping out at me and saying "THIS IS IT!" I mean, I know I'm a relatively indecisive person, but its freaking me out that I'm naming another human being and I just don't know what to name my poor little boy. People are saying to me "what's his name?" and I just say "he's the nameless baby right now" cuz I got nothin. I get all these weird looks and one woman said to me "well, that's the first thing I'd do!" Well, its not for a lack of trying! We just cant agree on or like anything!

So, my question is, when you finally chose the name for your DC, was it something you knew already? Was it something you both loved and agreed on right away? Or was it something that you thought you kind of liked that sort of grew on you?

TIA everyone!

Re: Kind of freaking out...

my .02 cents is, JAson was nameless until after and hour of life. I said Jason from the beginning. I have always liked it and it wasn't over used. DH said "NO". we made list of ALL sorts of names. He didn't want anything to ethnic (Italian) and I didn't want anything to super common. I was hung up on Carter. He not so much. So we waited, when he got here we BOTH decided he looked liked a Jason. Secretly I won!!!!!! LOL I got the name I wanted and the ethnic middle name. Win/win.

It will come to you. You DON't HAVE to have a name before. Maybe you will look at him and say he is a William. GL. I can't wait to meet little sprout!

Re: Kind of freaking out...

I know how you feel Lauren When we were originally told we were having twins, Jason & I panicked bc we only had 1 boy & 1 girl name picked out. Slowly we started to go through names & came up with an alternative list of names.

As you already know, DS will be named after Jason but not as a Jr. I know that is not an option for you but what if you made a list of the names you "sort" of like. I don't think you need to go into labor knowing the name bc my mom did that with me & then when I was born, she realized I didn't look like I would fit the name so they changed it!

Re: Kind of freaking out...

My DD#1 did not have a name until she was 24 hours old. I always liked Reilly, and it was a name that I came up with but DH and I were back and forth over what to name her. But, I had to fill out her SS forms before leaving the hospital so I had to figure out her name! Take your time, find one you both love and don't listen to anyone else. Even if it takes you until after he's born!

Re: Kind of freaking out...

I heard our DD's name on a TV show very early on in my pg. DH liked it and he picked her middle name.

As far as a boy's name we could not decide on one we liked right up until I gave birth. We knew we were having a girl, but if by some chance the sonos were wrong we had no idea what we would call a boy.

We are indecisive this time around as well but I am only 12 weeks so we have time.

I wouldn't stress about it. As others said once he is born a name might just pop into your head that fits him. My parents didn't have a name for me picked out until after I was born. No sonos so my mom didn't know what she was having and they couldn't agree. Once I was born my dad came up with a name and my grandma said she didn't like so he picked it anyway just to annoy her.

Re: Kind of freaking out...

we found his name in the parking lot of a Barnes and Noble about 2 minutes after buying the baby name book

i started flipping through it as we pulled away, and there it was - Luca! a gorgeous name, not too Italian, just enough

i know i am one of the lucky few though.

what i am doing for the baby - we have no names yet AND we are team !! - is going through the baby book, letter by letter, and making a list. DH is doing the same, then we'll compare lists.

it's a PITA but it works for us

Re: Kind of freaking out...

With DD, we were settled on a boys name but couldn't come to an agreement on a girls name. Of course, we were having a girl.

We had it narrowed down to two names by around month 8. Her name is Claire, and it didn't even make the list the first few run throughs of the name books. It just hit me one day, it was pretty and simple and not too common.

With this baby, we can't really agree on a boys name. I have faith that the same thing will happen and that in a month or 2 a name will just click. For now, it is very frustrating.

(We nixed our boys name from last round because I have since met 3 people with that name that I just don't like. If I can over come those encounters, we may go back to that name).

Good luck!

Re: Kind of freaking out...

I know 100% what your going through. We are so undecided. And as soon as I think OK, this is it, I just think, OK I dont "feel it" and start to become unsure again.

With Noah it just stuck out, was right from the start, no questions, but I cannot cannot find any girl names and my biggest fear right now is two nameless babies.

Your not alone.

Good luck!

Re: Kind of freaking out...

We only have a boy name picked out and we're team .

DH was named after his grandfathers so we're going to name DC, if it is a after his grandfathers (DH declared this long before we even were TTC and I came up with a combo that I could live with).

DH won't even discuss girl names yet - he said we will have three days to name her before we leave the hospital. I mean we throw out a name here and there and he'll either tell me it's ok or make a face that he hates it but, we haven't had a serious talk.

ETA - A lot of people think we're nuts that we haven't had a serious thought about names yet. I would tell people you aren't disclosing the name.

Message edited 8/25/2009 8:54:08 AM.

Re: Kind of freaking out...

Thanks everyone. You're making me feel a bit better. I just feel so awful about him having no name. I just call him the sprout right now. I just wish I had something to call him! I was so easy with my first pregnancy...and honestly, I almost wish I didn't name him Nicholas because we woudln't be in this mess right now. Towards the end we weren't sure if my first pregnancy was going to make it, so I said to DH, are you sure you want to keep this name for him? At the time he was sure...but now, we're both sort of regretting it. Well, what can you do...I guess right now we need to just figure this out!

Thanks again

ETA: We were thinking about Charles and calling him Charlie after my grandfather. And then we were also considering Jonathan and calling him Jack (love the name Jack and prefer Jonathan over John) and we also had the name James. Pretty much most of the names we chose, Nicholas is going to be the middle name.

Message edited 8/25/2009 9:07:34 AM.

Re: Kind of freaking out...

This is how it works over here...
-I make up a list of possible names I like
-He shoots down every single name and has a stupid reson for each one
-I make another list
-He shoots down every name again

For DS#1 this just went on and on until I FORCED him to go on the computer and search for a name. He eventually chose one of my choices but I think it was only because he didn't want to look anymore.

Re: Kind of freaking out...

I knew when Kevin and I got married that he wanted a son named after him so that was a done deal

with Mikayla, we tossed some names around and I said "what about mikyla" and he actually liked it, we went back and forth with the spelling for a while but ended up with Mikayla Shea (middle name tribute to the terrible baseball team I unfortunately love)

Message edited 8/25/2009 9:31:59 AM.

Re: Kind of freaking out...

We still had not decided on a boy name on the day I gave birth. Sophia we chose b/c it had always been DH's favorite and I found out it had always been my Dad's favorite, so Sophia it was!

Luckily we had a girl-but now the process begins again. Don't stress too much, you'll come up with something!

Re: Kind of freaking out...

we both wrote large lists of names that we liked and we were able to settle on one that way (he liked real italian names and i like cutesy names so it wasnt easy)

Re: Kind of freaking out...

We didn't know what we were having. DH and I tried to come up with names sometime in the second trimester, but we couldn't agree on anything. We actually sat at Borders and looked through baby name books, but we kept rejecting each other's suggestions.

I kept bothering DH about coming up with names, but he kept putting me off and saying we had time. Finally, at 36 weeks and while I was on bedrest, DH bought a baby name book and we each went through it. I made a list of names I liked and so did he. Then, we began crossing off names on each other's list. By the time we were done, there were only 3 or 4 names for each that we could actually agree upon. Although we ranked them, we didn't make a final decision until DS was born. We ended up picking the name that we originally ranked second, but definitely suits DS better.